Chapter 5
Brad
Oh no.
Joey looks sad. I don’t like seeing Joey sad.
“I’m sorry,” I repeat, feeling gut-punched when Joey takes a full step back.
“Not your fault,” he says roughly, his eyes downcast as he scrubs a hand through his hair. “I just assumed. But… Hold up, what about Jason?”
I’m thrown. “What about Jason?”
Joey’s eyes meet mine again. “Your ex?”
“My… Ohhh . Jason and I were never together. Not like that. Platonic bros only.”
He looks shaken, and I wish I could give the poor dude a hug. Probably not the best idea right now, though.
“So you’re just friends?” he asks.
“Just,” I confirm. “Like, super-close friends, but I swear our dicks have never touched. Well, there was that one time, but we were both clothed, and it was an accident. Honest.”
He shakes his head a little, and my breath puffs out of me. “So tonight…” he says. “This wasn’t a date to you?”
Oh, God .
“No,” I say, even as I hate it. “I didn’t mean to lead you on, Joey. I’m so sorry.”
He huffs an almost pained laugh. “You didn’t, though. That’s the thing. I don’t think I ever called it a date. I just…”
He groans, turning around, both hands on his head.
Fuck , it hurts.
“If I were into guys, you’d be my first choice,” I tell him honestly.
He groans again.
“Not helping?” I ask.
He shakes his head.
I lean back against my door, my head thunking onto the wood. “ Fuuuck . I’m sorry. This effing sucks. I was really into you, you know? In a nonsexual way,” I rush to clarify. “Like, as friends. Gym-bros. And now I fucked it all up, didn’t I? Was it the winking? I thought that was a thing. Jason said it’s not a thing. Fuck .”
Joey doesn’t seem to know what to do with any of that, but at least he’s facing me again, watching me in that steady way of his. My chest squeezes tight.
“I never meant to hurt you,” I tell him seriously. “I’d take it back if I could.”
“I wouldn’t,” he says, making my pulse jump. “I’ll still be your friend, Brad.”
I jolt upright. “You will?”
“Yeah,” he says, even as he shakes his head again. “You’re a nice guy. And… I could use a friend here. If it wouldn’t weird you out.”
“Why would it?” I ask, genuinely confused.
“Because I’m a gay man? And clearly attracted to you?”
Oh .
Kinda flattering, actually. But what about Joey?
“Would it weird you out?” I ask.
“No,” he says, and that’s it.
“Well, I mean… I don’t care that you’re gay, dude. Jason’s queer. Pansexual, specifically. And demi. He liked this one guy back in high school? And this girl in college, but nothing happened with either. And then he met Cas, who’s a dude, and that was it, you know? He’s all about the D now. Although I think he likes Cas’s ass, too, considering the things I’ve heard through the wall. You would not believe —”
“Brad,” Joey says, huffing a laugh. And, fuck , there’s his smile. “I get it. It doesn’t bother you that I’m gay.”
“Not at all. So…friends?”
Joey blows out a tiny breath. “Friends.”
“Hug on it?” I offer before reconsidering. “Or…shit. Shake on it? Foot five?”
He blinks at me. “What’s a foot five?”
“Like, you just hold out your foot…like this…” He watches my demonstration but doesn’t put his own foot out in return. That’s fine. “And then you just kinda tap . Right? Like a little side foot five.”
He looks as if he’s battling laughter. “Don’t change, Brad. We can hug on it if you want.”
“You sure?”
“Positive.”
Relieved, I pull Joey in. He’s not that much taller than my six feet, so it’s a good fit. Like last time, his arms swamp me, and I let out a breath at the welcome squeeze. I think Joey might be a better hugger than any of my past girlfriends. Which, nothing against them, but their arms were much smaller. And with the exception of Jane, who was wicked strong and, honestly, scared me a bit, they all liked being the ones who were swamped in my arms.
I like being on this side of things. Being the smaller one for a change. Feels nice.
Secure.
“You have to tell me if I do anything that makes you uncomfortable,” I tell him. “I don’t want things to get weird.”
His laugh passes near my ear, those thick arms giving me another squeeze. “Same.”
“Dude. There’s literally nothing you could do that would make me uncomfortable. At least, I don’t think. You’re a good hugger, by the way. You’re all warm, and you smell nice.”
“I…smell nice?” he asks.
“Yeah. Would it be odd if I asked what soap you use? Actually, never mind. Matching scents might be a step too far, huh?”
He huffs a laugh. “This is a long hug.”
“I know , man. It’s great. Did you know if you hug someone for at least six seconds, your body releases endorphins that make you happy and calm? And the longer you go, the more endorphins you get. Kinda like sex, probably.”
Joey grunts.
“So I figure if we hug for sixty seconds instead of six, we’re getting, like, ten times the happiness.”
“Makes sense.”
Right? And if I can make Joey a little happier after everything that went down tonight, I’ll feel better. He said it’s not my fault, but fuck , I sure feel to blame. There has to be something I can do to make it up to him. He thought he was going on a date, only to strike out with a straight dude.
“ Joey ,” I whisper. “I have the best idea.”
“I’m…almost afraid to ask.”
I lean back, placing my hands on his shoulders. “I’m going to help you find the one .”
His mouth pops open.
“Yes!” I insist. “It’s the least I can do. I’m gonna be your wingman, bro! Say yes.”
“I…yes?”
“ Yesss . You’re not gonna regret this. Let’s meet up tomorrow. Unless you’re busy? I’ll make a list. Yep. We’ve totally got this, dude. Tomorrow?”
“Uh, sure?”
“Okay, good.” I give Joey a little shove. “Go home so it can be tomorrow. Wait. One more hug for the road?”
There’s another laugh. “I think I’m good.”
“Yeah, okay, man. Sleep tight! See you in the morning.”
I shut my door on what I’m sure is Joey’s excited face and grab a pad of paper. Pen in hand, I flop onto my couch and start a list. Joey’s best attributes. Good first dates. Where to pick up guys.
My new bud isn’t going to know what hit him.
“Are you a boob or an ass man?”
Joey coughs, his hand going to his chest as I sink into the booth across from him at the diner we agreed to meet at. I was so excited last night I barely slept a wink. “Uh, hey, Brad.”
“Hey, my dude. So?”
He takes a long sip of his water before answering. “If those are my options, I guess ass.”
I make a note on my pad of paper. “Top or bottom?”
“Jesus Christ,” he mutters, cheeks flushing.
“Are you shy, man? It’s okay if you are. But the more honestly you can answer, the better chances we have of finding your guy.”
Joey looks like he doesn’t know whether to laugh or smack his head against the table. Honestly, I’m used to that reaction.
But I’m committed to this. Joey deserves the best, and, like I told him, I’m going to make sure he gets it. Which means finding out everything there is to know about my new friend, including whether he’s a plunder or be plundered kinda guy.
After taking a breath and looking around the fairly empty diner, Joey says, “It depends on the person I’m with.”
“How so?” I ask, intrigued.
“I’m fairly versatile,” he answers, fidgeting with the handle of his coffee mug. “But I’ve been in relationships where I’ve exclusively topped, and I’ve been in others where we didn’t do anal at all. I like making my partner feel good, so, to some extent, I’m going to be into activities that complement whatever they’re into.”
“ Dude . That’s rad.”
“Is it?” he asks, an eyebrow raised.
“Yeah. Your partners sound lucky. Do you like rimming?”
Joey spits out his sip of coffee. I cringe, handing over a few napkins. Luckily, a waitress takes that moment to approach. I ask for more coffee—a pot this time—as well as my own mug. Plus some hash browns with extra ketchup. She nods and walks off.
Joey’s eyes meet mine from across the table. They’re such nice eyes. So warm and inviting. “This truly doesn’t bother you? Talking about gay sex?”
“No?” I say slowly. “People are people, man. Sex is sex. I guess I don’t see why talking about other dudes’ dicks and assholes should bother me when I have my own. Singular dick and asshole, obviously. I’m not, like, doubling up down there. Whoa , could you imagine?”
“I’m not even sure I understand what’s happening right now,” he mutters.
Our waitress returns with a pot of coffee, as well as a mug for me. “Hash browns will just be a minute,” she says.
“Thanks,” I tell her, pouring my coffee as she walks off. “Would it help if I shared, too? I’ve never been rimmed, but I love going down on girls.”
Joey stares while I sip my caffeine. Perfectly black and oh so delicious.
“Should I expand on that?” I ask, setting down my mug.
“I think I’m good,” he answers, crossing his arms on top of the table. “Yes, I like rimming. Both ways.”
I make a note. “Do you want kids?”
His lips twitch. “From rimming to kids?”
“We’re starting with the big stuff, dude.”
He shakes his head, but he’s smiling. “I think I maybe would. But only if I end up with someone who feels the same. It’s not a deal-breaker for me either way.”
I nod, marking that down.
“What’s next?” he asks.
I look up at him with a grin. “Balls. How do you like them?”
Joey covers his face. I think he’s laughing, considering the shake of his shoulders, but on the off chance he’s crying instead, I push a few more napkins his way. When he drops his hands, there’s a smile on his face, and I breathe a sigh of relief.
“Christ, Brad. I’m really curious about the organization of this list. Uh…if we’re talking about my own, I prefer to shave if I’m, you know, sexually active. If we’re talking about my partner, it honestly doesn’t matter to me what their manscaping habits are.”
I nod. That tracks with what I know of Joey. He’s pretty down to earth and easygoing. It doesn’t surprise me that he’s not picky about whether or not his guys have bush, nor does it surprise me that he keeps his own balls in trimmed condition. He’s tidy like that.
“I shave,” I inform him, in case he’s curious.
“I’m well aware,” he mumbles.
I nod, lost in thought. “In my experience, people seem to prefer having hairless balls in their mouth more. And since I like my balls being in mouths, it only makes sense to stay smooth. Better chances that way, you know?”
“Oh God,” he whispers.
“Do you have a physical type?” I ask next, checking my list.
He blows out a breath, sitting back in his seat as our waitress arrives with my hash browns. I thank her again and dig in. I pause when I realize Joey is watching me.
“Baby frites?” I offer, pointing at my plate.
He shakes his head, biting his lip before saying, “I’m good.”
“All right, man. So? Type?”
He blinks, eyes running slowly over me. “Good smile. Because it means he’s nice. I like the roughness of stubble on my skin and someone who’s sturdy enough where I don’t have to be too gentle. Lately… I’ve had a thing for the color green.”
I nod, writing those things down. Smiley. Masculine. Green eyes .
“Anything else?” I ask.
“The inside is more important to me,” he says. “I want someone like… Well, someone like you.”
“Dude,” I say slowly, setting down my fork. “That’s a super-nice compliment. Thank you.”
Joey swallows, looking a little uncertain, so I reach across the table to give his arm a reassuring squeeze.
“We’ve totally got this, Joey-roo. I’m gonna find you the most wonderful guy. Just you wait and see.”
He nods, letting out a soft huff of laughter when I flip to the next set of questions in my notepad. “How many pages do you have?”
“Six, I think? You have time?”
“Yeah,” he says, a small smile on his face. “I have time.”
“Awesome. Let’s talk kinks.”
Joey’s chuckle is warm, like melted milk chocolate. It makes me feel warm, too, and my resolve to find Joey’s person strengthens.
Maybe we met for a reason. Maybe this is what I’m supposed to do for my new friend. It’s not like it’s a hardship. I want to help Joey. It feels like a step in the right direction on this winding trail called life.
I flip to a familiar page in my notebook and jot that down.
Step two in Brad’s Guide to Finding Himself and Falling in Love:
Do a good deed .
Heck yeah.
I’ll be the best wingman Joey has ever had. Mark my words. By the time I’m through with him, he’ll be head over heels in love.