Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
I woke to a man singing acapella in a language I didn’t recognize. It was a pleasant, harmonious song prayer, like a Gregorian hymn or a Muslim adhan. The singing made me smile. I stretched my body feeling refreshed until I saw the dried blood on my hands.
I sat up and screamed as memories of being stabbed with an energy spear poured into my brain.
When the man didn’t stop singing, I calmed myself and took a few deep breaths before speaking. “Did I die from being stabbed?”
Finally, his voice stopped singing long enough to answer me. “Welcome back, lass. We don’t exactly know if ya’re dead or not. All we know is that no one’s ever broken the wall the way ya did. The elders are working on an explanation to calm the masses who now fear others will be able to do it.”
I put a hand on my chest where the spear pierced me. “Did someone operate on me? My chest doesn’t hurt anymore.”
“No, lass. The spear that stabbed ya faded away when the maker of it left yer presence. I don’t think the real purpose was to kill ya until ya were dead. I think it was done to discourage ya. A spear to the chest can do that to a person. They weren’t wrong in what they chose as an intimidation tactic. Ya’re healing from what could have been yer death. The sting of not being able to stop them will serve as a good reminder of the dangers. ”
He paused for a moment and rose from his seat. His hair was light brown, spattered with red strands and reddish highlights. His face was a smooth light bronze, slightly freckled, and oddly familiar. He reminded me of someone but I couldn’t think of who.
“What were they trying to discourage me from doing? All I was doing was going home to see Mom.”
“You should ask the ring to answer your questions. It probably knows. I hear ya can talk to it.”
I checked my hand and gasped. A small version of the Seal of Solomon now stared back at me with no cloaking on it at all. The red cinnabar stone was gone. Around the seal, tiny diamonds winked in their sets. I lifted my hand to study it. I couldn’t read the language, but I knew what it said. The symbols translated into a divine promise that “this too shall pass”. In the full context of the statement, it referred to everything bad that came to be in the world. Nothing was permanent. Everything could be changed. The ring could bring about that change or stop it from happening. It could make things come to pass.
“I can’t believe the ring followed me to my death. Shouldn’t it have stayed in the real world?”
“Well, ya see... that’s why we don’t think ya’re dead. The ring coming here should be physically impossible. Ya’re only a projection in this place. Yer body is elsewhere.”
“So am I dead or not?” I wanted a straight answer.
He chuckled at the insistence in my voice. Or that’s what I thought.
“So far, we’re going with no as the answer,” he said. “You’re not dead yet. Stick around a bit, though, and that might change.”
“If I’m not dead, why am I here with all the angels?”
“Most likely you’re here waiting on Semyaza to come get you. He’s the one who helped your soul get through the wall.”
“Who? What?” Then I gasped and put a hand on my chest. I pulled it away when I felt wetness. “Eww... I’m all bloody. Shouldn’t I be in pain?”
“There’s no genuine pain in this place. Mild discomfort is the worst a person feels here.”
“Well, I guess that’s something to be grateful for.”
His laughter seemed rude, but I was happy not to be alone, so I held my tongue. If I discovered he was my guide to the afterlife, though, I was going to tell him his bedside manner sucked.
And the way he stared at me was unnerving. That would have to go as well.
“There’s no getting around the reality of what happens when the soul leaves the body. It used to worry me something fierce. Ya wake up one day and everything ya know is gone. This is why I asked not to be embalmed when my body died. I was afraid to wake up in a mummified corpse and not be able to move inside it.”
“Do you consider yourself dead here?” I asked, swinging my legs around. The table was tall and my feet dangled a little. Mom would have had to jump off the table. I slid to the edge and eased my legs down until my feet touched.
I took a few steps and tried to ignore how gross I felt in my bloody clothes.
If this was my afterlife, it sucked so far. I was mad and wanted to go kill the beings who’d stabbed me. I looked around and wondered where Tony was... or the Semyaza person. Knowing the truth about him was harder to deal with than I thought it would be.
The man got a glass and filled it with water. He smiled as he handed it to me. “If ya can drink this, ya’re still alive. I drink all the time so I figure I’m not dead, either. Of course, try telling that to my sweet Bridgette. She was mad as could be when I had my heart attack. Leaving her was the only regret about living that I ever had. I had to help her find another man to warm her bed before she forgave me for leaving her.”
I drank the water down. My thirst for answers was also unquenchable. “Could I have some more?”
“Sure,” he said, taking the glass from my fingers to refill it.
“Did you have children before you came here?”
“One. A daughter. There are things I wish I’d done differently with her, but I knew she’d be okay. I’ve not worried about her much.”
“How did you know that?”
“My daughter was born with a good heart. It was always going to win life’s biggest battle no matter how many wicked gents she let herself care about. Now I figure if they didn’t see her for the gift she was, that was on them. The light of all our ancestors burned too brightly inside my child to be extinguished by some lying Jack.”
“I think I must be dead. I’m hearing your story but I’m not feeling it. Instead, I feel mad at the ones who stabbed me and sad that I never got to hug my mother one more time. If I seem rude, that’s the reason. I appreciate your company and your patience.”
He rubbed his jaw. “No worries, lass. Don’t ya think death is a limited concept for what happens when yer corporeal body ceases to live? I was shocked to wake up here, but knew my soul was here for a purpose. Take my advice. Work on expanding yer mind so ya can pick how ya will spend your life after yer soul’s final transfiguration.”
“You sound like you like being dead. I mean... if you are.”
“Well, I no longer walk the Earth, so it’s the same thing to most humans.”
His chuckle was soft and kind. It was nice of him not to tell me to shut up and stop asking stupid things. “My grandmother’s name is Bridgette just like your wife’s.”
“Life is full of coincidences. They’re messages from one soul to another. Not everyone bothers to listen.”
I looked around as I drank my water. “Is this your room?”
“No, it’s where new souls come. I’ve never been drawn to one before. Ya’ve been quite the surprise for me.”
“My grandmother has an Irish accent like yours. Maybe that’s why they sent you to me.”
“Maybe so,” he said, smiling at me. “Are ya feeling any need to run away?”
“No. Should I be feeling that?”
“Everybody reacts differently. I try not to judge.”
“Me too,” I said. “Do you ever feel the urge to run?”
His laugh was friendly... and I liked his smile. He looked barely older than me. Guessing by his reddish hair and his accent, if he was an ancestor of mine, he would have come from my mother’s side.
He stroked his smooth chin. “If ya’re asking if I mind being here, the answer is no. I’m at peace now. I do miss my wife and the family we created. But they had work to do in the Earthly realm that required their physical presence. After I died, I chose to stay here and do some good while I waited for them to find their peace.”
I grunted in disgust. “Well, I wasn’t given a choice. Four demonic beings did this to me. I saw the wall and all of you behind it. As I passed out, I heard the wall dissolving. It sounded like static.”
The man studied me. “Maybe it’s not my place to tell ya this, but Semyaza chose this place for you. He also chose me to look after ya. I haven’t seen him panic often, but he sure panicked when he saw that spear in yer chest. I think he’s fond of ya, lass, which is saying something rare because he rejects females on principle these days.”
“Those guys that tried to kill me... I didn’t even know who they were. I never saw them before. After they stabbed me, they waited to make sure I was going to die. Who does that?”
“Well, now, that’s a complicated question. There are forces of good and forces of evil in the world, Fiona. How a person views them depends on their circumstances. Those four ya tangled with were the ones who don’t want the world to improve or change. They’re powered by negativity. Since negativity breeds fear for their own existence, they mastered projection, which I can tell ya cost them a lot of magick. They seem odd to ya because ya’re powered by nothing but good intentions. The ring wouldn’t talk to ya otherwise.”
“I’m a protector of the ring, but I guess you know all about me since you’re an angel.”
“Well, I’m something like that,” he said kindly, smiling at me. “I serve in his legion. Semyaza was the original leader, or so I’m told. He’s currently doing something else but he still recruits for our cause. That’s all I can share about the matter. We’re more secretive about our purpose than ya have to be about protecting the ring.” He grinned at me. “That’s a joke, girl. Ya know ya can’t go around announcing what ya do, don’t ya?”
I chuckled. “Yes. After being stabbed today, I won’t need any further convincing. Is Tony Semyaza in Earthly disguise? I need to know.”
“When he and I worked together on the physical plane, I wasn’t in a good place. I didn’t take his advice the way I should have. He knows ya turned down Kabir to stay with yer overseer. He thinks ya’re dumb for doing it and yet pleased ya made that choice. I don’t know what’s between the two of ya, but he’s conflicted about his feelings. Most of us didn’t know he could feel anything more than simple compassion.”
I slid off the table and gingerly walked around. The more I moved, the better I felt. “So were you a protector of one of Solomon’s rings when you were alive?”
“Before I came here, yes, I guarded one of the rings. And I could have done better. I never had yer gifts but I had more than I used. I was one of those humans who developed to a certain point and stopped growing. It was not good for my soul but it made for a simple life.”
Instead of explaining his unused gifts, he stood there smiling at me.
“Are you allowed to talk about it with me?”
He chuckled softly. “I don’t ask that question since I’m the sort who asks for forgiveness rather than permission.”
My sigh filled the room we were in. “I think I play by the rules too much. It was my way to control my world when Dad and Mom’s relationship fell apart. Controlling my environment has become a need for me. I can see how that could work against me.”
“I can tell ya that protecting an artifact capable of granting great power is not a straightforward job, especially when ya don’t always have someone to share the burdens of it with. When word gets out about ya protecting the ring, powerful beings will track ya down and try to kill ya before yer time. They think if they possess the ring they’ll get its power too. They’ve heard the stories of how the rings truly work but refuse to believe they won’t be an exception.”
I crossed my arms over my bloody chest and nodded. “I figured that out already. But I’m more than a protector. The ring speaks to me. When I ask for its help, it helps me, providing it agrees. I don’t know who is running the show inside the ring, but the voice I hear tells me there are legions of beings in it. I don’t know what that means, or why I’m developing a relationship with them, but I am. This is as natural to me as breathing.”
“So I’ve heard about ya. I think ya should consider it a gift, Fiona. Never believe anyone who says it isn’t. Also, don’t lose faith in those moments when it might feel more like a curse.”
“Like when I get stabbed by a hologram man with an energy sword?”
“Exactly so,” he said.
I chewed my lip. It was liberating to talk freely about the ring but I didn’t want to burden anyone with my struggles. Still, I could use some counsel other than the angel overseer I argued with all the time.
“I don’t trust Kabir. He doesn’t deserve to be an overseer. Tony or Semyaza or whoever he is can be a bastard but he’s got a mostly good heart. Kabir wants to control the ring himself. Whoever made sure he couldn’t has done the world a favor. He wants me to be the next King Solomon. That’s not the life for me. I will never do what Kabir wants.”
“So it’s true then,” he said with a happy sigh. “I can’t tell ya what it means to me to know for sure that ya’re the chosen one the ring’s been looking for. Tell yer mother the truth of it all, Fiona. She’s strong enough to share this burden with ya. If they come after her, Aran will cut them down.”
“Mom’s the one who told me about the ring. She borrowed it from Gigi to help a guardian. The ring talked to Mom. One of the things it told her was that I was to be the ring’s protector. It didn’t obey her commands but it worked with her. It was a case of mutual respect, I think.”
“I’m sure ya’re right.”
“I admit it was hard for me to believe her when she put the ring on my hand.” I bit my lip. “Those seven years Mom was in prison destroyed my faith in her. I know how powerful she is now, but I still feel unsure sometimes. Why wouldn’t Mom use her magick to be with me? I never figured that out. I can’t understand what was more important than helping me find my way in the world.”
He lifted an eyebrow, and his mouth twitched. “Well, speaking as one of yer angelic helpers...”
“Is that what you are?”
“I’m happy to be that for ya,” he said.
“Fine,” I said, playing along. “Sorry that I interrupted.”
He grinned at me. “Like all other beings walking the planet, yer mother’s primarily human. She loved yer father and was trying to spare all three of ya as much as pain as she could. Being a Child of The Dagda, she took the burden of making things work all on herself. Was she right to do what she did? She doesn’t believe so now, but she did at the time. Looking back and seeing something as a mistake is how most humans learn the hard lessons of their life.”
I snorted. “Like me stepping out from behind Tony? His elbows kept jabbing me. I thought I was helping him by getting out of his way.”
“That was an honest mistake made by an innocent soul. It’s nothing to regret. Willfully putting an innocent in harm’s way is another matter. Does that make sense to ya?”
“Yes. I guess everyone walking the planet makes mistakes.” I paced around. It felt good to move. “How do angels know so much about people? Do you follow them around? Do you pop in and out of existence when they need your help?”
The man laughed. “Well, in my case, I didn’t want to completely abandon my family. I came here because my instincts said they still needed me, even if I couldn’t be with them in person any longer. Validation of that decision took a long time to find me, but I’m glad now that I decided to wait here. I could have regenerated and started over. I chose not to do that yet.”
I went over and leaned against the table I’d lain on. It looked like an examination table in a doctor’s office. “No offense, but I don’t think I want to stay here. I feel like I have too many things to do.”
“None taken, child. I don’t think ya should stay here, either.”
An odd thought struck me. It popped out before I could consider if it was rude or not. “You used my name earlier. What’s your name? Are you allowed to tell me?”
He stuck both hands in his pockets and looked at the floor. He studied it for a long time. What was it about angels not wanting to share their real names? Was it some form of negative magick for them?
His gaze finally raised to mine and he sighed. “I could tell ya my name, but I’d rather ya call me Grandpa like ya used to when I was in my physical body. I know I don’t look like the old man ya remember, but I’m him. This is what I looked like when yer Gigi and I met.”
I stared, stunned by the revelation.
“Grandpa?”
“Yes. I’m here for ya, girl,” he said.
I moved silently into his arms. His embrace held all the comfort I’d been looking for. Bloody tears ran down my face and onto his shirt. “How are you here? You’re dead.”
“I’m not as dead as ya think, Fiona. I’m just not walking the physical plane anymore. I transformed into the being ya’re hugging. Our souls move on to other lives when we die physically.”
“Am I dead physically?”
“Ya’ll know soon enough. Semyaza has yer physical body with him. He’ll be calling yer soul back to it if it’s still usable. If not, I’m sure he’ll come to tell us in person. He crosses the veil routinely. It’s only one of his many gifts.”
“What do we do until we hear from him?”
He pushed me away and grinned. “We get to spend a little time together. I can tell ya what happened to me when I was the ring’s protector.”
I nodded. “Semyaza is Tony, isn’t he? I saw him change into his true self.”
“Semyaza is an immortal being. His humanity is merely a uniform he wears to do a job. I didn’t appreciate him the way I should have when I served the ring and he served me. But I did learn a lot about him. The world judges Semyaza too harshly. His actions were without malice and ill intent. He corrected his mistakes and paid for them. Try to keep an open mind when he’s training you.”
I looked at the ceiling while I fought to keep my blush from giving me away. Did I dare confess that I had kissed the being he admired so greatly? Was I leading him down the same corruption path he’d walked before?
My grandfather, along with who knew how many other winged beings, had watched Semyaza fighting for my life.
A wave of cold swept over me. “What is it?” my grandfather asked.
“I feel sick... and chilled to the bone.”
His hands gripped my arms tightly. “Ya’re being pulled back, Fiona. If ya fight it, ya might not return to yer body. Go back in peace. Live as happily as ya can. I’ll see ya again sometime. Beings with wings always come back here, even temporarily.”
“I hurt again,” I said, unable to take in his words because I was cradling the wound in my chest.
My grandfather gripped me hard. “Ya’re a survivor, girl. Don’t let anyone tell ya differently. Grit yer teeth and bear it. It’s yer destiny to use the ring for good deeds. Ya’ve done it already. Ya know this to be true.”
Still holding me, he began to sing again. I relaxed a bit as I listened.
“Close yer eyes, Fiona. I’ll ease ya back across the veil as easy as I can.”
I closed my eyes, tried not to cry over the pain, and prayed for the hurting to end.