35. Litany of Lost, Fallen Things
35
LITANY OF LOST, FALLEN THINGS
T he library was dark this time of night.
As Luella danced gracefully through the maze of tall shelves, her eyes strained in the darkness.
Where was Nyx?
The sky was blanketed in a thick fog of clouds and haze. Barely any light filtered in through the glass dome above, and Luella paid extra care to each step she took. An unlit chamberstick was a weight in her palm, but she didn’t dare light in—in fear of it acting as a beacon and drawing unnecessary attention to herself, where she was skirting along tall stacks of disordered tomes and towering shelves stuffed to the brim.
Luella huffed a sigh, annoyed.
She had hoped to stumble upon Nyx just as easily as she had the first time, but she guessed not everything would be that simple, would it?
She absentmindedly brushed a finger over her lips as she walked. A blush warmed her cheeks as she remembered the night prior. She and Graves had sat in this very library, and he had taken her first kiss. Barely a full day had passed since, and it seemed all Luella could dream of was the taste of him on her, the scent of him wrapped around her.
Her hands traced over the many shelves, and she came to the bend that led to the tiny, hidden spot Nyx had shown her.
Squeezing through the small shelves, Luella angeled the chamberstick above her cloaked head to fit through the space.
The greenery was thick in this part of the library, and a tiny vine brushed against her arm. She bit back a squeal. Not being able to see well in the dark of the area, her traitorous mind conjured up images of spindly hands and pointed teeth.
Nyx had said that there was a network of tunnels deep underground, and some entryways could be found in the library. Luella wondered what it would take for one to stumble into the vast tunnels and find their way into the palace. What if that’s how the attackers made their way inside?
She shuddered, suddenly aware of how alone she was here, in the darkness of the quiet alcove.
Her hands grappled for purchase on the slimy stone walls, and she carefully stepped over puddles of stagnant water and patches of slippery moss.
A sconce flickered with a faint flame, the brass handle fixing it to the wall was twined with vines, holding it like a gentle hand.
Tucked far in the back of the library, Luella felt safe enough to light her candle. She lifted the chamberstick and put the wick to the flame. It ignited with ease, casting shadows across the backs of her hands where they stuck out from the folds of her cloak.
The alcove was untouched, looking just as it had when she had been here with Nyx. Walls of stone, combined with overflowing shelves, coupled with spurts of greenery and the musty scent of old water.
Just when she thought she may never stumble upon the little sprite, she heard the faintest titter of laughter.
"Nyx," Luella called in a hushed whisper.
She heard a faint gasp, then a buzzing sound similar to the rapid beating of a hummingbird’s wings.
A whirlwind of shimmering green and bronze almost made her stagger back, but Luella caught herself with a hand against the wall.
"Lu!" exclaimed the sprite. Nyx perched on one of the shelves, dark green hair falling over her shoulders in little silken curls as she cocked her head, curious, watching Luella. "I’ve been waiting for you."
"I’m sorry," Luella said, biting her lip. "It was… hard for me to find a moment to visit you again."
Nyx hummed under her breath, twiddling with a leaf in her delicate hands. "No matter. You’re here now."
The sprite gasped suddenly, shooting away from where she was sitting and hovering midair in front of Luella.
Careful to keep the lit candle in her grasp away from the sprite, Luella angled the chamberstick off to the side, casting her and Nyx both in a dim glow of orange, mingled with the thick shadows of the alcove.
"Did you read the book I gave you?" the sprite asked impishly.
"No. I’m sorry. I truly haven’t had the time yet." Luella looked down, chagrined.
Nyx’s head dipped forward, eyes glistening and lower lip jutted out. Luella sighed, unable to stop herself from cooing over how cute the sprite was.
Nyx mumbled, "That’s okay."
"I will soon. I promise."
The sprite looked up. Placated, for now.
Her energy was infectious; she couldn’t help but feel completely at ease in Nyx’s presence.
Luella felt a rare grin curve break free.
"I’m here for your help again." Luella procured the journal from within the folds of her cloak and presented it to the sprite. "I want to find more books like this one. It was interesting. How long ago the words must have been written; the history was far more telling than a simple history book. To hear a personal recounting…"
Luella stopped herself from saying anything further. She still had to be careful with her word choice in front of the sprite. Nyx answered to Tharen—her so-called master—and Luella didn’t want to risk saying the wrong thing.
Nyx gave a tiny nod, leaves falling from her hair. "Of course, I can help you." The sprite smiled, her two front teeth poking into her bottom lip.
Luella’s shoulders sagged, thankful for her help.
Maybe, just maybe , she could learn what was truly going on and escape.
She had to.
For Az.
Her knees ached.
Luella stretched her hands above her head, the billowy sleeves of her cloak falling to her elbows and exposing the expanse of her skin.
A yawn threatened to crack her jaw in half.
She and Nyx had been scouring the shelves in the hidden alcove for what felt like hours. But Luella knew it couldn’t have been that long.
The night was still and solemn, and every so often, Luella sent Nyx to check the height of the moon through the skylight in the main part of the library.
She still had time.
But with every passing moment, the hour for Luella to venture back to her room was growing closer and closer.
She sighed, fingers stilling on the spine of some nameless book. The leather was cracked and worn, and when she angeled it to check the front cover, she saw it was another senseless tome of spells and old proverbs. The nook was full of them. Luella wondered if she would ever find anything similar to the journal again. It must have been a fluke for her to happen upon the journal in the first place.
Every novel she and Nyx picked up and skimmed was some nonfiction collection of spells. No mention of a nameless he or the enigmatic Umbra…
"I’m done with this shelf," Luella mumbled as she walked on her knees to a small section of shelves at the furthest part of the nook. It was half hidden by the stone walls, and Luella wrinkled her nose at the sour scent of mold wafting from the slimy walls.
The cave entrance loomed in the furthest corner behind the shelf, and Luella felt she must keep an eye on it at all times. The pit of darkness made her fearful. What may crawl from its depths? Her body was angled toward where it lay, yet she was pressed far away, not willing to get any closer to it.
How could she venture into its depths if she could not even muster the courage to get closer?
Her knees were coated in pieces of algae and wet from where she had been kneeling on the ground for so long. She would have to find a way to discard the cloak before Ina or Osa saw it and mentioned the state of it to King Vale.
Nyx gave a soft and high hum under her breath in acknowledgment, flitting about the top shelves and checking them for Luella, who was much too short to reach.
"I’ll go check the moon again," said the sprite.
Luella nodded absentmindedly, attention stolen by the untouched corner of the library. Cobwebs stuck to the spines, connected to the corners of the wooden shelves. Little tangles of vines covered a large portion of the collection.
It was a litany of lost, fallen things.
Forgotten by time and taken by the elements.
Luella felt a strange sense of melancholy overtake her.
One day, would she be reduced to mere words on a dust-covered shelf?
Luella barely paid attention as Nyx flitted back into the alcove, perching atop her shoulder. The ends of her sparkling wings tickled Luella’s cheek, and she resisted the urge to bat them away.
But that wasn’t what made her pause.
No.
Luella’s focus was solely on a small brick jutting out from beside the shelf. It was wedged half behind the lowest portion of the bookcase, and the other half protruded from the stone wall. The stone was a mottled grey color, blending perfectly with the others. But something about it…
Her soul yearned. It reached. Clawed with desperate hands, begging Luella to look .
"Do you hear that?" Luella asked as she shook her head, trying to dispel the faint call ringing in her ears.
Nyx tugged on a golden strand of hair curling from behind Luella’s ear. "No."
"That stone…" Luella trailed off.
Her knees pressed into the rough floor, water dampening the fabric and chilling her skin. The sleeves of her cloak brushed against the stagnant pool of water, the little dripping noises as it plinked off the sleeves and fell back to the stone floor sounded far too loud, echoing in time with her heart.
Nyx said something, but Luella didn’t quite hear. Her brain was utterly consumed by the faint buzz that emanated from deep within her soul, calling out to whatever was tucked behind that stone.
Her head cocked, eyes falling upon the well of nothingness she knew to be carved into the stone wall behind the towering shelf. Was it coming from there? Her ears strained while her heart kicked up into an anxious beat. What if someone was hiding there, lying in wait, ready to pounce?
But, no, she didn’t think so.
Her eyes drifted back to the stone that had caught her attention.
As a fae, Luella was raised to believe in higher powers and the gods, but never had she actually paid much heed to words of destiny. Not until that moment, with her magicless soul crying out and a sprite by her side, Luella felt like this exact moment in her life was written in the stars. Some unforgotten, celestial place of purples and flecks of blue and the shine of countless stars, far above in the sky.
Luella reached with shaking hands to unlodge the stone from the wall.
She tugged and tugged, jaw clenching as she tried to free it from where it was wedged. The stone bit into her palms, but with a single-minded focus, Luella ignored it. Until a jagged edge sliced into the skin of her palm.
Luella gave a short gasp of pain and pulled her hands back from the roughened stone, cradling them to her chest. A long, thin cut was sliced directly across her left palm. Even through the haze of whatever was clouding her mind, she felt the sting.
Hissing through her teeth, Luella inspected the wound. Red blood trailed in thin rivulets down the cut to her wrist, dotting the ends of her black cloak and turning it dark and wet.
"Lu!" Nyx exclaimed. "You’re hurt."
The tang of iron from her blood mingled with the musty air of the alcove, making Luella’s stomach roil with nausea.
"I’m alright," she replied. Her voice sounded thin and thready as if coming from a great distance.
Luella tugged down the sleeve of the cloak and held it tight to her palm, keeping any more blood from falling to the stone ground. The last thing she needed was a certain vampire to stumble into the library one day and smell her old blood from somewhere within. She wasn’t sure how, exactly, vampires scented blood, but Luella didn’t want to risk it. Not now.
Not when she was so close to something .
She bit her lip; the call thrummed in the air, a faint hum of adrenaline making her feel like she was standing at a precipe—overlooking a vast canyon, toes hanging over midair as the balls of her feet kept her firmly grounded, awaiting her to step off and leap into nothingness.
"Can you—" Her mouth was dry. "Can you help me?" she asked the sprite.
Luella didn’t wait to hear her reply. She went back to tugging on the stone with a renewed vigor, determined to free it.
Nyx lept off her perch on Luella’s shoulder. Small hands grasped a corner of the stone, and Nyx wedged her body behind a corner, wings fluttering as she used the motion to propel her forward to try and dislodge it.
The piece of stone came free with a clatter, nearly cutting into Luella’s hands again and crushing Nyx under its weight. It was almost the size of the sprite herself.
It fell against the floor, and she didn’t even glance at it. Luella’s attention was captivated by what lay tucked in a hollowed-out space in the wall.
A book.
It was small, a personal journal or diary of some sort.
Nyx’s tiny hands shot up to her mouth. "Wow."
Luella gave a soft hum in agreement, awe clouding her mind and making her limbs feel tingly.
Reverently, her fingers traced along the spine. A small spider scurried from the cover, disappearing further back into the hole, and her teeth dug into her lip to stop a startled yelp from breaking free. As she pulled the book away, cobwebs stuck to it, tangling with her hands. Dust motes floated in the air, caught in the candlelight of the chamberstick resting by her knees.
Luella’s focus was so stolen by the discovery she barely noted how the call within her had settled to an inconsequential pitter-patter, almost drowned out by her heart. If she hadn’t been so concentrated on it, she would’ve assumed it was the skittering of a cockroach across the floor.
Her hands smoothed over the cover as she rested the book atop her knees. It was a wonder it didn’t crumble under her touch. Luella didn’t think she had ever felt anything so aged. Not even in this deep part of the library, full of old tomes, as it were. It was a dichotomy. An ageless power radiated from the book, yet it appeared as if it had just been bound.
"How long has this been here?" Nyx asked, coming to settle on a shelf at eye-level with Luella.
Luella looked at the sprite, mouth slightly parted in her awe.
"I have no idea," she replied, words soft.
Luella looked down at the purple cover of the small journal; no title, no markings at all, an unadorned cover of leather. The pages were white and pristine, but the musty scent wafting from it spoke of its age. "But I feel I was destined to find this."