18. My Lady
Chapter 18
My Lady
R aewyn
What was happening?
Well, I knew I was being kissed for the first time in my life, but how had it happened?
When Stellon had touched my cheek and looked into my eyes, my heart had started pounding like a drumbeat from one of my ancestors’ traditional battle songs.
My eyes had fallen to his lips, taking in their full shape, their appealing softness. I couldn’t say the thought of kissing him hadn’t crossed my mind.
But the reality of it was mind-bending.
In fact, I couldn’t think at all. My knees were shaking, and my eyes had closed without my permission. My skin felt flushed all over, sensitive to even the touch of the light breeze.
When Stellon sank his hands into my hair and stroked the back of my head and neck, I feared I might actually pass out—or fly apart like sparks lifting off from a bonfire.
This must be that sexual glamour Pharis had mentioned.
Of course I had none, but that had to be Prince Stellon’s glamour.
Maybe both brothers had it.
The kiss had been so unexpected there had been no time to reach into my purse and apply the poison to my lips first.
And now I had even less desire to do so than before.
All I wanted was to continue drowning in these delicious sensations for the rest of my days.
But we were alone. It was dark.
And there was no one around to see.
Stellon’s guard was clearly down. An assassin couldn’t hope for a better set of circumstances.
If I was going to do it, now was the perfect time.
There is no if. I have to do it.
I would tell him I needed a moment, touch my own lips with the powder, then ask him to kiss me again.
After the poison took effect, I could push Stellon’s lifeless body over the wall where it wouldn’t be found until at least the morning. It would plunge into the dark sea–or maybe strike the jagged rocks lining the shore.
Then I’d be free to move on to Pharis.
The word NO screamed inside my head and echoed through every part of my body.
It might not have even been a sound, more a loud, overpowering feeling of resistance. It was followed by a sick sensation in my stomach.
Stellon had been kinder to me tonight than any man ever had been. He was not the cruel, callous prince that had been described to me. And the poor thing was obviously under some sort of love spell concocted by the Earthwife.
He had no idea the interest he felt in me wasn’t real. How could I even think of killing someone so vulnerable?
Think of Papa. Think of the girls. They’re vulnerable, too.
I wanted to cry. I wanted to run away and never look back. But I had no choice.
Pressing a hand to Stellon’s chest, I created some distance between us and broke the kiss.
“I… need a moment,” I said. “I’m afraid my lips are rough and dry. I need to apply some balm.”
Feeling as if my heart was lined with lead, I delved a hand into my bag and started thumbing the cork off one of the vials.
Stellon’s voice was soft. “I assure you they’re not. Your lips are—”
A loud, facetious voice interrupted.
“Soft as star-poppy petals? Tender as a kitten’s nose?”
It was Pharis, moving quickly toward us across the lawn. He barked a bitter laugh. “Come on brother, you can do better than those old, tired lines.”
Stellon stiffened and turned, taking my hand in his and pulling me to his side.
At the sight of Pharis, a rush of relief nearly buckled my knees. Which made no sense. Based on his ground-eating stride, he’d figured out my true identity and my nefarious mission.
But when he reached our position, he didn’t even bother looking at me. His sly smile was reserved solely for Stellon.
“Getting a little fresh air, are we?”
“What are you doing here?” Stellon asked, his tone filled with irritation.
“Apparently stopping you just in time,” Pharis said. “These things can get out of hand very quickly—and I know you don’t have as much practice as I do starting and stopping.”
“ No one has as much practice as you do,” Stellon growled. “I told you, I don’t need a chaperone. Go back inside.”
Now Pharis’ stare moved to me. A sexy grin curved his lips.
“You might not be in need of a chaperone, brother, but what about little Wyn? She looks rather… overwhelmed by your attentions.”
His tone became a cruel taunt. “Was that your first kiss, love?”
He laughed again at my answering scowl. It had been my first kiss, but I certainly wasn’t going to discuss that with him .
“Leave her alone,” Stellon ordered.
Pharis was unfazed. “I’m not sure Lord Elardis would appreciate you luring his innocent daughter out into the dark garden and ravishing her. Wars have been started for less.”
He actually winked at me, as if to say your secret is safe with me .
Pharis knew I wasn’t a noblewoman, but I hadn’t confessed that to Stellon. He still thought I was Lady Wyn of Altum.
I guess I hadn’t seen the point in clarifying misconceptions when my aim had been to end his life. Just thinking of it now made my stomach roil and threaten to eject the enormous dinner I’d consumed.
That was the source of the relief I felt. I’d missed my opportunity.
Pharis had stopped me just in time… and I was glad. I was also sick with worry. I might never get another chance like that one.
What was going to happen now?
Casting a glance back toward the castle, I searched the darkness for the Earthwife. Had she been watching? Did she know I’d failed?
“My intentions toward Lady Wyn are entirely honorable,” Stellon told his brother.
“Honorable,” Pharis echoed then said it again in a much lower tone, making a silly face as if he was emulating a much older and very ridiculous man.
“Honorable. Ah yes, the heroic Crown Prince, always doing the right thing. What, are you planning to marry the girl?”
His expression and tone both indicated the idea was ludicrous.
Stellon said nothing, simply raising a single brow at him. For a few moments, a tense silence reigned, and then Pharis exploded into anger.
“You can’t be serious. You just met her.”
“As I told you, I feel as if we’d already known each other. That must have significance,” the Crown Prince said.
“And I told you what I felt with the matchmaker’s glamour,” Pharis practically shouted. “She’s not only wrong for you, she was literally the least suitable woman who came through the door.”
“Then why have you attempted to spend every moment with her since the evening began?” Stellon fired back.
Pharis’ aggressive stance softened. He took a deep breath before speaking.
“I didn’t say she wasn’t suitable for me .”
He paused, looking down at the ground then back up at his brother.
“I’m trying to help you. If you’ve ever trusted me on anything, trust me on this… she’s not the one for you. Have you asked her about herself mind to mind?”
“What? No, of course not,” Stellon said. “We’ve only just met. Some of us have the good manners to wait until we know each other better.”
Now Pharis’ brows raised. “Looked like you were getting to know each other pretty well before I interrupted. I tried it. She wouldn’t answer me.”
“And I don’t blame her,” Stellon said. He looked offended on my behalf.
“Only you would be so insolent as to barge into someone’s mind the first time you meet them. I’ll thank you not to do that again to my lady.”
“Your lady…” Pharis appeared to consider the words. “Shaded stars, you really do intend to marry her. You fool.”
My mind, which had apparently frozen at the first mention of marriage, became unstuck and started whirring.
Was this conversation actually happening? Was this just some sort of sibling rivalry thing, or was Stellon serious ?
He glared at Pharis, stepping closer and clenching his fists. “You’re the fool if you think I’ll let you continue insulting her.”
Pharis’ stance changed as well, straightening to his full height as he looked slightly down at his older brother.
If the village brawls I’d seen were any indication, there was about to be a fight right here on the palace lawn during a royal ball.
I stepped forward, pulling at Stellon’s arm.
“I’m fine,” I assured him. “I don’t care enough about his opinion to be insulted. And I’m starting to feel rather cool out here in the night air. Would you escort me back inside please?”
For a moment, neither of them moved. Then Stellon’s shoulders rose and fell with a deep exhale, and he turned to face me.
“You’re right, my lady. It’s not worth it. Let’s go in for desserts.”
I nodded rapidly, darting a quick glance over my shoulder at Pharis as we walked away.
He still stood in the same spot, his unearthly blue eyes following us and seeming to promise that this discussion was far from over.
I couldn’t blame him for being angry of course. He’d been absolutely right. If he hadn’t come along when he had, Stellon might already be dead.
Another wave of nausea rolled over me. I’d come within seconds of taking someone’s life.
This someone, who’d caused feelings in me tonight I’d never experienced in my life—none of them mercenary—and who’d almost come to blows with his own brother over my honor.
Sorcha was wrong. Stellon didn’t deserve such a fate.
I was possessed by the desire to go back in time and undo my mistakes. If that were possible, I’d never have gone to the marketplace that day and met Stellon, never have been invited to this disastrous ball.
I’d never have made the bargain with Sorcha. Things had been bad then, but now they were worse.
The only thing to do now was to slip away as soon as I got the chance and make my way home as quickly as possible.
Maybe my family and I could leave the village, go somewhere the Earthwife couldn’t find us, and start again.
But she had powers I didn’t fully comprehend. Was there a place we could go that was out of her reach?
Probably not.
There was an Earthwife in every village, and they probably all knew each other. Plus how would Papa manage to travel if Sorcha withdrew her magical cure? She’d said his pain would be even worse if I failed to carry out my mission.
My head was a swirl of turmoil as we reentered the palace and the ballroom where the dancing had resumed. Desserts had indeed been laid out. In fact, they covered several tables on one side of the grand room.
Tindra and Turi would be in raptures just looking at them. Unfortunately, I had no time to think of sweets at the moment. I had to think of an excuse to get away from the prince.
“Are you all right?” Stellon asked, placing his hand at the small of my back. “Are you still upset over what Pharis said?”
“No. Truly. I don’t even care.” I had much more dire things to worry about. Saving my family, for instance.
“I want you to know I put no credence in it. My brother’s acting strangely tonight. It probably has nothing to do with you. Honestly, I think he might be afraid of losing me,” he said.
“Losing you?”
Panic stabbed my gut. Had Pharis somehow known I was a danger to Stellon?
Had he told him mind-to-mind that I was an assassin?
Was that why he’d brought me back inside, so he could reveal me publicly and the guards would be close at hand to escort me away?
“Losing our relationship,” Stellon clarified, “in its current form. Things will naturally change when I take a bondmate.”
I’d no sooner released a sigh of relief than I realized where Stellon had led me—to the raised platform at one end of the room.
It was empty now, the seaglass throne abandoned. Apparently the King had tired of the festivities, and he and his attendants had left.
What were we doing here? Oh gods, I hoped he didn’t intend to make me dance with him up here in sight of the entire crowd.
Stellon urged me to ascend the few steps then moved from my side to stand facing me, taking both my hands in his.
His eyes were bright, his smile uncertain.
What is going on?
Directly in front of us, couples on the dance floor were performing yet another dance I didn’t know. But one by one, they stopped and stared up at us.
The musicians stopped playing, and a hush fell over the ballroom.
“As much as I would have sworn I wasn’t ready for it before the Assemblage began,” Stellon said. “I am now.”
And then he dropped to one knee, keeping hold of my hands while gazing up at me.
My heart thundered, and it felt like I was seeing him—and myself—from far away. What was he doing down there? What was happening?
“I don’t need to dance with anyone else,” he began.
Oh no.
“I don’t need to discuss it with anyone.”
My eyes flickered away from Stellon as Pharis stepped into view, emerging from the crowd behind him. His glower was hot enough to melt the glass throne and the castle’s stone walls.
“I don’t need any additional counsel on the matter,” Stellon went on, obviously aware of his brother’s presence, though I wasn’t sure how.
My eyes dropped to connect again with the Crown Prince’s earnest light blue ones.
“I have made my choice,” he said, more loudly, speaking not just to me but so that everyone could hear.
“Lady Wyn… you have captured my heart, and I know you will hold it for all eternity. Would you do me the great honor of becoming my betrothed… and the future queen of all Avrandar?”
Oh no.