34. A Pretty Good Deal
Chapter 34
A Pretty Good Deal
R aewyn
Why did he have to be like this, so different from who I thought he was?
Why did he have to do this to me, again and again?
My heart, which had felt solidly frozen toward him less than an hour ago, now seemed to be melting. In a panic, I searched my mind for some of the less endearing things Stellon had said during our time together, trying to rebuild that wall of ice.
There was a sound from the adjoining sitting room. A door opening.
My eyes flew to Stellon’s face, expecting to see panic written there. He looked calm. Pleased even.
What was happening? Had he changed his mind about keeping me a secret?
My gaze went back to the closed bedroom door, afraid that at any moment it would open, and my presence here would be revealed.
There was more clamor from the other room as what sounded like several people entered. A closed door separated us from whomever was on the other side, so I couldn’t see them and they could not see us, but surely this was bad?
Stellon still sat calmly, wearing a half-smile.
I mouthed the words, “Should I hide?” at him.
He shook his head and got up, coming over to my chair and leaning down to whisper in my ear.
“It’s okay. Just a few moments, and you’ll understand.”
His closeness and the heat of his breath sent a shiver down my back. What was he up to now?
Was someone delivering yet another gift I’d have to refuse?
It couldn’t be any harder to resist than the previous ones, which had been things I’d always wanted without even knowing it.
I sort of felt like I might die if I didn’t get to smell that heavenly perfume again—and if I had to give back the magical hummingbird.
There was a bit of a clatter now coming from the balcony, which ran the length of his suite of rooms. Standing just in front of me, Stellon leaned against the frame of an open window and watched whomever was out there do whateve r they were doing.
“Thank you,” he said. “You may begin.”
At the first strains of music, it all became clear.
He’d arranged for a quartet to enter his sitting room at a certain time and access the balcony from there, setting up their instruments to play just on the other side of the windows.
Once they began playing, he turned and spoke to me out loud. “It’s safe to speak freely again. They won’t be able to hear us.”
I kept my voice low anyway. “But what if they see me? They’re right outside.”
Through the glass I could see the elbow of one of the musicians as he drew his bow back and forth over his instrument.
“They won’t. Don’t worry. They’re facing the ocean—and they’ve been warned, upon penalty of death, not to look into the windows.”
He smiled. “Being Crown Prince does come with a few advantages.”
Relaxing my shoulders and breathing normally again, I settled back into my chair and listened.
Just as it had on the night of the ball, the music entranced me. I’d heard plenty of musicians play at our village’s weekly dances and occasionally in a neighboring village.
This was different.
Whether it was due to their musical glamour or their unique instruments, I wasn’t sure, but Elven music seemed to have a power of its own.
“It’s beautiful,” I said in a dreamy tone as one song ended and a new one began.
Stellon smiled widely. “I’m glad you like it.”
He approached my chair and extended his right hand. “May I have the honor of a dance, my lady?”
My heart rolled, causing me to place a hand on my chest.
“I… don’t know how to dance,” I told him. “Not like you do it.”
“I won’t judge. Don’t worry—there’s no one around to see you brutalize the royal toes.”
The music did make me feel like moving, the way it had my first night here in the palace. And this time there was no need for me to pretend any sort of expertise the way I had when masquerading as a high Fae lady.
As a human, there could be no expectations I’d be any good at this. So I took Stellon’s hand and allowed him to pull me to my feet and into his arms.
Placing his cheek against mine, he whispered. “Even if you did step on my feet, you’re so little I’d hardly notice.”
I looked up at him in surprise. No one in my life had ever considered me “little.”
But then, I was looking up at him, and his shoulder width dwarfed my own. My hand inside his had very nearly disappeared, wrapped inside his much longer fingers. Compared to him, I guessed I was little.
“We’ll see about that,” I said, and we began to move to the music.
As it turned out, the little bit of practice I’d done the night of the ball had served me. I didn’t step on Stellon’s toes once.
The song ended, and he smiled down at me. “You worried for nothing. If I didn’t know better, I’d swear you grew up in the house of an Elven nobleman.”
“Well that could not be farther from the truth,” I said. “But thank you.”
“Shall we keep going?” he asked.
I was a little shocked by how much I wanted to. I nodded, and he led me in the steps of a new dance.
Blame it on the music , I advised myself. But honestly, it felt incredible to be this close to Stellon. It always did.
I always wanted more of him.
When he’d begun his confession about having a glamour he was embarrassed to talk about, I had fully expected him to tell me he had sexual glamour. Instead, he’d named an entirely different one.
Still, I wondered.
“Is it possible for Elves to have more than one glamour?” I asked.
“It’s possible, but not common,” he said. “I have heard of a few. No one’s quite sure why that happens—most of us have only one.”
“And you?” I asked, tentatively. “Do you have only one?”
He nodded.
“Are you sure?”
A quizzical smile touched his lips. “Quite sure. Why do you ask?”
My cheeks heated, and I looked away. “Just curious.”
When I braved looking at Stellon’s face again, he was staring at me.
“What?” I asked.
His head shook back and forth slightly. “Nothing. You just remind me of someone—or I should say, she reminded me of you. ”
My heart lurched inside my chest then kicked into a rapid rhythm he could probably feel, as closely as we were pressed together.
I knew who that “someone” was—Lady Wyn. Was he finally figuring out my dual identity?
“How so?” I asked, trying to keep my tone casual.
“Well, she was beautiful, though not nearly as beautiful as you.”
I rolled my eyes.
Stellon dipped his head and lowered his voice. “And she was shy the way you are at times.”
“You think I’m shy?” I asked.
“It seems that way when you blush and avert your eyes. Or maybe you just don’t want me to know what you’re thinking?”
I shook my head. “I’m an open book.”
“That must be why I love you so much,” he said and lowered his mouth to mine as if he was about to kiss me.
Abruptly I pushed away from him. “Stop.”
“Why?” His face was troubled. “I can feel your heart beating fast when I hold you, and you look at me like you want me, too.”
“I don’t. I mean… we can’t. You cannot love me, Stellon.”
“But I do,” he said. “Can you not see that? Feel that it’s true?”
“You cannot love me when you’ll be marrying someone else in a few days,” I said.
What was wrong with him? He knew what was expected of him better than I did.
The corners of Stellon’s mouth turned down. “I don’t want to be with anyone else. Ever. I want you to stay here with me.”
“How would that even work?” I asked. “I can’t stay in these rooms forever. You’re going to… what? Introduce me to your father and say you’ve fallen in love with a human and have decided not to marry a highborn Fae lady after all? I’m sure he’ll be very understanding.”
His tone was sullen. “No. I can’t do that. You’re right, he’d never accept it. But I have thought of another way.”
I waited, all ears.
“I’ve told you, repeatedly, that I have no interest in keeping a retinue,” he said.
Lifting a hand toward me, he went on. “And I’d never insult you by suggesting you should stay in that capacity. But there is another possibility—an official role that would eliminate the need for hiding, that would elevate you to a position of honor, of respect.”
He stepped closer and took my hand inside his, drawing it to his chest where he flattened it over his pounding heart.
“I could take care of your family openly, not in secret,” he said. “You could accompany me in public, go to all the balls and official events. I could openly declare my love for you.”
My head was spinning. What kind of “role” would make all that possible? Was he offering me some sort of job in the palace?
“What are you talking about?”
“You could be my official consort. You’d never want for anything. I can’t marry you, but I could give you everything else. It’s an accepted practice in some of the other Fae courts. Why could it not work here as well?”
It took a few moments for my stunned brain to comprehend what he was proposing.
“Are you saying that you would just never marry? That you and I would be together, and if one day we were to have children, they’d be… royals?”
His expression changed, becoming more guarded. Lifting a hand, he scratched his face.
“No. That would be impossible. I’m not sure an Elf and a human could even conceive children. Even if it were possible for us to have children, the royal line of succession can only be carried on through me… and my bond-mate.”
Seeing the confusion on my face, he clarified. “My wife. Who must be Elven.”
“Your… wife,” I repeated.
My lips drew together, and I pulled the bottom one inside my mouth, biting on it as I worked to piece together the scrambled bits of information he’d given me.
“So then… you do still plan to marry in a few days,” I said.
Stellon nodded, a grave expression on his face.
“But only because I have no other choice. I wouldn’t love her. It’ll probably be someone I barely know.”
“But you’ll have children with her,” I clarified for myself. “You’ll sleep with her?”
“I’ll have to—only until she produces an heir.” His gaze swung up to the ceiling. “And probably a second child.”
His eyes came back to lock with mine. “But it would be only a matter of duty, nothing I’d enjoy. Once our children have arrived, I’ll send her away to one of our country homes so you won’t have to see her and feel uncomfortable. You’ll be my real life partner, my only true love. As my official consort, you’ll have nearly as much power as a princess.”
“Power?” A harsh laugh burned my throat. “Is that supposed to be some sort of enticement to me? A carrot you’re dangling out there to lure a stupid donkey forward into its pen?”
Everything about this scenario was laughable.
“I’m not a donkey, Stellon. And I’m not going to be your mistress .” I spat out the word like it was rancid. “The fact you’d even suggest it means you don’t know me at all.”
Thank the gods I hadn’t let him kiss me again. Elves had amazing powers of seduction—even more than I’d realized. Apparently I was almost helpless against them. Almost.
Between the romantic, hypnotic music and the near-kiss, I’d forgotten myself tonight. Stellon made that all too easy.
Which meant he was dangerous .
I had to keep a clear head and not fall under his influence again, or I’d soon find myself answering to the title of “consort” and committing adultery with another woman’s husband.
Though I had no particular affection for most of the Fae women I’d met, I’d never do that.
“I know you’re not a donkey,” he said in a reasonable tone, as if I was the one suggesting madness here.
“And I’m not trying to lure you,” he said. “I’m trying to convince you this plan is a win for everyone.”
“I wonder if your future wife would agree?” I asked sourly.
He brushed off the question with an impatient wave. “I don’t even know who that’ll be. Look, I realize it’s not perfect, but it’s the best I can offer, and—”
Here he cut himself off short.
“And?” I prodded.
“Well, for a person in your circumstances, I actually think it’s a pretty good deal.”
Anger flared from the bottom of my gut, rushing up my chest and threatening to boil over like a forgotten stew pot.
“Get out.”
“What?” Stellon asked.
I raised my arm and pointed at the door.
“Get. Out. I don’t care where you sleep tonight, but it’s not going to be here.”
“You can’t throw me out of my own chambers,” he said, obviously affronted.
“Oh yes I can, and I’m doing it.”
“Let me at least stay and sleep on the settee. If I don’t tend the fire, it’ll die during the night, and you’ll get cold,” he warned.
“I don’t care,” I said. “I don’t want you on the settee. I don’t want you in the next room. I don’t want you anywhere I can see you, hear you, or smell you.”
“And where do you expect me to go?” he asked, sounding exasperated.
“You can sleep out in the flower gardens for all I care. Or better yet, on the edge of the sea cliff.” I gave him a little shove that didn’t move him one inch. “Just get out.”
As I’d been talking, the volume of my voice had been steadily rising.
Stellon stepped close again and placed his palm over my mouth, muffling me.
“I’ve ordered the musicians not to look inside, but you’re tempting them. I know you don’t want a cellist’s death on your hands.”
That quieted me, but nothing was going to change my mind. I couldn’t stand to look at Stellon, much less share sleeping quarters with him.
I stood facing him, my hands on both hips as I waited.
With a last mournful look at me, he turned and departed, and I collapsed back into my chair.
He must have informed the quartet the party was over because a minute later they stopped playing, packed up their instruments, and left.
In the resulting quiet, I reflected on our conversation and realized I was actually glad it had happened. Stellon didn’t see me as an equal and never would.
He didn’t consider me worthy of being his princess. No doubt the rest of the Fae high court would concur.
If I stayed in his life, I’d never be more than a secondary figure, an extra... an amusement.
Was it really any better than being a courtesan at one of the pleasure houses?
Walking into the sitting room, I locked the suite’s exterior door. I hadn’t seen Stellon take a key with him, and he’d told me no one else had one, apart from the king.
So unless His Majesty decided to pay an unexpected late night visit, I had the place to myself until morning.
I went back into the bedroom, pulled the bed curtains tightly around me, and cried myself to sleep.
Unfortunately, my slumber didn’t last long.
It was still dark out when I was shocked awake by a deep male voice that was very nearly a growl.
“Who the hell are you ?”