A Dance of Shadows (The Royal Spares #3)

Chapter 35

Chapter Thirty-Five

Aurelia

W ith each turn of the carriage wheels closer to the palace I grew up in, the ache in my stomach expands.

Some part of it is the eager anticipation of seeing all the people I left behind. A larger part is apprehension.

How is this visit going to go? What are my family and friends going to make of my husband?

What are they going to make of how I have to behave around him?

On the opposite bench, Linus chuckles to himself. Naturally he’s acting as emperor today, as he has with every arrival at a new capital. He hasn’t let any hint slip about his plans for Costel, though. All I know is the tidbit Bianca passed on.

Gods smite him, let that be enough.

We wave to the locals who’ve gathered along the road around the edge of the city. I’ve kept a smile pasted on my face from the moment we came into their view.

Many of the Accasians are calling out my name, some referring to me as “Princess Aurelia” instead of “Empress.” After the first few instances, my husband’s stance starts to stiffen.

I don’t think he anticipated what it’d be like venturing into a country where I’m better known—and more beloved—than he is.

Still, he gives his own jaunty waves and grins avidly at the people we pass. During a brief lull as we rattle over a bridge, he lounges back in his seat with his usual careless attitude, though his eyes glint ominously.

I grope for something to say that might prompt another clue out of him. “I look forward to getting to introduce you properly to my family.”

Linus aims a smirk at me that turns my blood to ice. “Yes, it should be quite an occasion.”

It always has been so far, hasn’t it? He’s turned every pledging ceremony into a spectacle of horror.

He always comes up with some way to twist his demands into something even more awful than I could have imagined.

Even worse than I could have imagined… What if the scenario I assumed he’s arranging isn’t going far enough?

How could he make his challenge worse? If he wants to keep us on our toes as much as possible, to put us through the most humiliation and struggle…

My pulse kicks up a notch. It’s more important than ever that I speak to my parents—quickly, with time for them to prepare.

As with every other capital in the empire, a smaller palace stands next to Costel’s royal one for imperial use. Our carriage stops right outside the imperial palace, but my gaze immediately shoots to the elegant stone turrets and polished wooden shutters of the building where I lived for most of my childhood.

“You’ll be staying in the imperial quarters in our palace, of course,” Linus drawls, possibly recognizing the longing in my gaze.

Of course. I’m much more than a returning princess now—I’m “Her Imperial Highness.”

The implications of that fact don’t fully hit me until we step out of the carriage and find my parents, my sister, and her husband waiting to greet us. Even as my heart leaps seeing their faces, their faces dip low with their bows—not just to Linus but to me as well.

My hands itch to yank them upright and pull them into a hug. But that wouldn’t be becoming for an empress in front of her court.

As they straighten up, both Mother’s and Soreena’s eyes widen slightly as they pass over my belly. Most news crosses the Accasian border slowly. They mustn’t have known I’d be with child when I arrived.

Father is gesturing to the palace staff who’ve clustered around them, many of whom rush to unload luggage from the carriages. He aims a warm smile at both me and my husband. “It’s an honor to have you in residence. We’ll escort you to your rooms personally.”

Good. Maybe I’ll get a chance to speak to them alone then.

Linus shoulders between me and my family to stride along next to Father. “We’ll take a couple of hours to recover from the road, and then we’ll have an assembly in the city for the pledging ceremony. Better to get that formality out of the way immediately and dive right into the celebrating.”

He’s leaving out the part where he torments the locals, having them dance to his whim.

“I looked at a map of the city before we arrived,” he adds. “Conducting the pledging ceremony in the large square at the north end of the city would suit my purposes best.”

Certainty about his intentions solidifies in my gut, but my parents have no reason to suspect anything like what my husband must have in mind.

Father dips his head. “That wouldn’t be any trouble, although I will mention that the royal square that’s more central and closer to the palace is significantly larger.”

“Size is only one consideration,” Linus says breezily.

My sister glances back at me with a flash of a smile. I can tell she wants to draw me into a conversation right away, but she’s holding herself to formal protocol.

I’m never going to be just her sister again. I’m her empress as well.

Mother picks up the conversation with mentions of the dinner that’s already being prepared and the ball they plan to hold for both the Accasian and Darium courts tomorrow evening. We weave through halls that feel strangely familiar and yet not, the same tan plaster and beamed ceilings as I’m used to but a route I’ve never taken before, passing rooms I’ve never entered. Even the woody-sweet cedar scent doesn’t taste quite right.

Mother pushes open one door with a sweep of her arm. “These are the empress’s chambers.”

As I glance inside, my gaze flies straight to the windows. Sunlight filters through the swaying boughs of the pine trees beyond the back gardens.

A pang fills my chest. At least the view is almost the same as from my old bedroom.

A small bowl sits on the floor just inside the doorway, laid out with a few tidbits of fruit and bread. Linus spots it and wrinkles his nose. “Feeding the daimon? I’d have thought at least Accasy’s royalty would be above that ridiculous superstition.”

The imperial family has encouraged everyone in Dariu to ignore the spirit creatures that flit through our world rather than enticing them. They’re so sure they can build their fates without any intervention except that of the gods themselves. From what I’ve seen, their attitude has spread through the conquered courts, but they haven’t spent enough time in Accasy to influence us much.

“Simply a long-standing tradition,” Father says quickly, letting the criticism roll off him. “In times past, surviving in this realm took all the favors we could get. I’ll see that the offering bowl is removed from your room. I can show you to it now.”

While leaving Mother and Soreena with me.

Linus’s mouth tightens for a second as if he’s going to protest, but even he must realize there’s no reasonable excuse for denying me a little of my family’s company in private. He lets my father escort him away.

Andru, Soreena’s husband, hangs back near my guards while she and Mother walk with me into the room. The moment the door has closed, Mother steps closer—and hesitates.

She isn’t sure if she’s allowed to embrace me.

My throat closes up. I throw my arms around her, making it clear just how much I welcome the warmer greeting.

Mother hugs me back tightly and lets me go so Soreena can wrap me up in the most emphatic of big-sister embraces. “My gods, I can’t believe how long it’s been. I missed you so much. Has he been at least tolerable?” She pulls back to peer at my belly. “How far along are you?”

I open my mouth and find I have no idea how to answer her first question. No, Marclinus hasn’t been tolerable , although I suppose I could say I’ve tolerated him all the same.

How in the realms could I explain just how repulsive he’s been? How could I detail the trials he and his father put me through, the additional torments and humiliations afterward, the horrible secrets I’ve uncovered?

Would they even believe me without having seen all if it themselves? It sounds so outlandish. I can hardly believe it after living through all that wretchedness.

And whatever they do believe, there’s nothing they can do to fix my husband or what he’s put me through. They sent me off to meet my fate, and I’ve endured it as well as I can.

Do I want to lay all the guilt I know they’ll feel on their shoulders?

Something twists inside me with an ache that steals my breath. I gather myself and answer the much easier question. “A little more than five months now. And I missed you too—both of you. Everyone. I suppose Cataline, Nica, and the others will be at the ceremony and around afterward?”

Mother nods. “The palace is full—the largest court we’ve held in decades. Everyone wanted to see you back home.”

She takes my hand, a shadow passing through her eyes, and touches my sapphire ring. “You saw through everything we planned. I didn’t think you intended to bring children into the situation quite so quickly.”

Heat prickles up my neck at the thought of all my reasons for that decision. They don’t know that I intend to assassinate my husband too—they still imagine he’s someone I’ve been able to work with.

I suppose today’s events will clarify my “situation” in ways nothing I can say would.

And today’s coming challenge is the one thing I do need to convince them of now.

With a jolt of urgency, I grasp Mother’s fingers. “Things have been… rather more difficult than I expected. My husband has some unusual ideas. In particular, for our coronation tour, about how his conquered kingdoms should show their allegiance. You need to listen to me and follow exactly what I say.”

Mother blinks at me. “What? What’s going on, Aurelia?”

My grip on her hand tightens. “I think he’s going to have us go up to the hills—he’s going to re-enact the fable about Kosmel and caves somehow. When he asks you to show him the cave from the story, you must show him the ceremonial one where we conduct the ritual during Kosmel’s festival. Not the one people actually hid in. Don’t show any familiarity with that other cave at all.”

Soreena knits her brow. “Is that why he wants to start at the northern square? But why would he have us go up to the caves?”

I wave my other hand vaguely through the air. “It doesn’t matter. All that matters is you show him the one I said, the shallow one. And send a few servants to leave magic-blessed lanterns and some food and water in the deeper cave, keeping out of sight.”

More concern tenses my mother’s expression. “I don’t understand. What do you imagine?—”

Footsteps creak in the hall outside. I clutch her hand with both of mine. “Please, just do what I said. I promise we’ll all be better off for it.”

The words have barely left my lips when the bedroom door swings open. I drop Mother’s hand and push my mouth into an innocent smile just in time to acknowledge Linus, who’s ambled over the threshold.

His sharp gaze flicks over all of us as if searching for signs of a conspiracy. Thankfully, both Mother and Soreena have played the game of politics enough to will their confusion from their faces.

But do they believe me? Are they going to listen to my plea or dismiss it as the frantic rambling of a travel-dazed, pregnant newlywed who’s in over her head?

Linus reaches out to pat me on the shoulder, a gesture that probably looks more affectionate than it feels. “I’m sure my wife is too polite to put off family, but the long days on the road take a lot out of her in her… delicate condition. Let’s ensure she has a little time to compose herself before her first public appearance in the country of her birth?”

When he puts it that way, my mother and sister can’t argue without looking like asses. Linus ushers them out of the room.

His gaze flicks back toward me and drops to my belly with a disdainful curl of his lips. “See if you can’t find a gown that gives you a more pleasing shape, so I can enjoy looking at you at least while it’s on.”

I don’t know if it’s even possible to disguise my increasing size at this point, but my cheeks flare hot with unbidden shame. “I’ll do my best, husband.”

I can’t take any comfort from the once-cherished view or the familiar trappings of my surroundings. All through my supposed rest and the primping of my maids, my worries gnaw at my innards.

When Jinalle and Eusette have finished patting the last dab of powder on my face and fastening the final ornate bauble around my neck, the woman I see in the mirror might as well be a stranger.

I join Linus in our carriage, acknowledging more well-wishers all the way to his chosen square. The hills loom high just beyond the last few city streets farther north. I spot my closest friends among the Accasian nobles gathered off to the side of the hastily constructed stage and return their eager grins with more dread souring my mouth.

What horror is my arrival bringing down on them that they can’t possibly be ready for?

It feels nothing but unnerving to watch my parents, Soreena, and Andru kneel down before Linus and me, swearing to serve us. The cheers and joyful hollers of “Empress Aurelia!” echo through me without easing my heart.

My pulse thumps twice as hard when Linus strolls to the front of the platform with one of his wicked smirks.

“Good people of Accasy!” he calls out, familiar words that now make me cringe inside. “I hope many of you will join your king and queen in honoring me with a tribute to the gods. Let us venture up that hill there to commemorate the divine adventure on which Kosmel once led your forebearers!”

Mother’s gaze jerks to me with a tick of a muscle in her jaw. She must have passed the message on to Father, because his expression sets with a hint of resignation.

All I can do is give them the slightest nod of encouragement to follow my guidance and set off after my husband to the waiting carriages.