A Dance of Shadows (The Royal Spares #3)

Chapter 49

Chapter Forty-Nine

Aurelia

I roll over on the bed for the thousandth time and suppress a groan at the sunlight streaming through the window. I’ve spent more time tossing and turning than actually sleeping, but my maids will be by to get me ready any minute now.

We’re almost back in Vivencia. Just half a day, and I’ll be out of carriages for as long as I can reasonably avoid them. I’ll be in the palace where I can slip away to see my princes whenever we need to through the passages in the walls.

I’ll find out exactly what Marc meant with his promises.

That last thought makes my innards wobble as if I’m back in the carriage already, jolting over a pothole. When I blink, the image comes back to me of his intense gaze when he told me he loves me.

What does that even mean from a man who thought nothing of starving me and poisoning me less than a year ago?

How can part of me actually believe him?

It doesn’t matter even if I do. He doesn’t know me. If he loves me—in whatever way a man like him is capable of—he loves the facade of a perfect wife I’ve presented him with.

I yank aside the covers with a little more force than is really required and heave myself off the bed. I should still have a few weeks before the life inside me decides it’s time to meet the world, but it’s hard to imagine my belly getting much bigger. It’ll certainly be a while before I can glide around the palace with appropriate imperial grace again.

A glimmer by the bottom of the window catches my gaze. I shuffle over, yawning and stretching the aches from my hips and back as well as I can, and peer outside.

My heart skips a beat and then thumps harder, drumming a swell of affection through my veins.

Several coraya seed pods lie scattered on the outer window ledge, shining with reflected sunlight even brighter than they gleam by moonlight.

One of the princes must have gathered some when we had our interlude in the coraya grove in Accasy. He saved them for a moment when he could offer them up as a reminder of the love we share. Perhaps Bastien breezed them up to the window last night, or Raul climbed through the shadows while Lorenzo concealed him from the guards with illusions.

I’ll see my lovers properly tonight. One way or another, I’ll make sure we can meet in the sealed-off servants’ room that everyone else has forgotten.

When the knock comes on my door, I call my maids in with my mind still elsewhere. While they help prepare my outward appearance for the day, I prepare inside.

I had to endure Linus’s company all yesterday. It should be Marc today. That’ll make the last part of the trip home more pleasant—and I’m sure I can encourage him to join me in my bedroom after dinner. One prick of my ring, and I can safely head off to the interlude I’d prefer to be having.

And I won’t let myself feel guilty about it, not a single twinge. What has Marc ever offered me, really, except pain and pretty words?

I catch myself fidgeting with the gold wedding band that’s grown tight around my wrist and force my hand to drop to my side. Eusette pins the last lock of my hair in place and declares me ready to face the world.

I proceed to the dining room on my own, other than the two ever-present guards trailing their discreet—but shorter than usual after the other night—distance behind me. Savory, creamy smells drift up the stairs from the waystation kitchen.

Animated chatter carries from the doorway ahead of me. Clearly plenty of the nobles roused themselves early, looking forward to finally getting home.

“Your Imperial Highness!” Bianca ambles down the hall to meet me at a faster pace than looks completely casual. She dips her head and falls into step beside me. “It’s a pleasure to see you this morning.”

“It’s good to see you too, Vicerine,” I say, biting back the question of why she’s made sure to do so.

Bianca drops her voice low as if to exchange frivolous gossip. “I thought you’d want to be aware—Marclinus is in an odd temper this morning. Mostly good-humored but snapping at odd moments. I’ve treaded carefully.”

My stomach sinks. “That’s unfortunate but useful to know. Thank you for the forewarning.”

Bianca offers me a tight smile, the warmth in her eyes softening it. “Thank you . I haven’t really said that yet, have I? For… for being so merciful with Ennius.”

The slight quirk of her mouth with those last words tells me she recognizes it was really her I was attempting to offer mercy to.

I grasp her hand and give it a quick squeeze. “I believe in everyone finding the peace they deserve.”

Her smile relaxes at that. “I’ll certainly relish every moment of it. It’ll be nice to rejoin the full court after all this time.”

We walk into the dining room together so I can find out how much peace I’m going to have today.

At the head table, my husband is standing rather than sitting, one foot propped on the seat of the chair as he makes an obscene gesture to his noble friends clustered nearby. Whatever story he was telling them, the motion sets off a wave of laughter.

If my stomach had dropped before, now it plummets to the vicinity of the bedrock far beneath our feet. That can’t be anyone but Linus.

Why has he taken the part of emperor for a second day in a row? Has something happened to Marc?

Wouldn’t the more purposeful twin have wanted to see to the business of the empire as soon as we arrive in the capital?

Linus glances over and notices me. I paste a smile on my face and move to join him. As I take my seat, he flops into his own even more carelessly than usual.

“Home sweet home is in sight,” he says in a jaunty tone. “Much less lumbering in and out of carriages for you, wife.”

The baby’s kick at my kidney matches my frustration. I dip my head. “I’ll be very happy to be done with that.”

And with you, whenever I finally can be.

The sooner I get into the carriage for this final part of the journey, the sooner that can happen. I dig into my breakfast as quickly as befits an empress’s manners. The food falls heavy into my gut, which is also currently serving as a punching bag.

I look forward to the day when my daughter can do her squirming outside of my body rather than inside it.

As I stand up, a sharp jab runs through my pelvis. I freeze with a lurch of my pulse.

The brief cramp subsides, leaving me in the same achy but mobile state I was before. I drag in an even breath.

The medics advised me that new pains would arise in the final weeks as my body finishes its preparations for birth. That cramp was merely a sign that I will soon be ready to hold my daughter properly.

I gather myself to find Linus watching me with an inscrutable expression, his eyes narrowed above his smirk. “Is all well, wife?”

He’d probably rejoice to know about the discomforts of my pregnancy, as much as its outward effects on my body seem to displease him.

I recover my smile. “Quite. Are we to be off?”

“In a hurry, are you? I believe the carriages are being brought around.” He looks toward the dining room windows with a huff of a sigh. “Let us discover how much the rest of our court has missed us.”

Word will have gone ahead of us to summon them back to the palace. But if they’re in their right minds, they’ve enjoyed the reprieve from their emperor’s chaotic moods.

He leads me out to the convoy, which is indeed gathering in front of the waystation. With a flourish that looks nothing but mocking, Linus offers his hand to me to help me up the step of the carriage.

Because of course he couldn’t offer his wife the slightest kindness without turning it into a joke.

Anger flares within my ribs, twisting into a tight knot of flame that smolders on as I accept his hand and then watch him settle onto the cushioned seat across from me.

If I could send him up in flames with my will alone as that soldier tried to do to me, I’d be very tempted to give it a shot right now.

I drag my gaze to the now-familiar Darium landscape beyond the carriage. The leaves on some of the trees have yellowed with the cooler—but hardly cold—temperatures of the southern winter, giving the patches of forest a brightly mottled look that has a certain appeal. Much more appeal than staring at Linus’s sneer.

All that’s left is four or five more hours of enduring his company in such close quarters. Then… I may not be rid of him yet, but I’ll be able to find out where the end of our journey will take us.

I don’t know why he didn’t ask any of his friends or playthings to join us in the carriage. For the first few miles, he makes no effort to engage me in conversation, remaining in uncharacteristic silence.

When I finally look at him again, he’s watching me with a grin so cutting it’s almost a grimace. A shiver races up my spine.

Linus leans back in his seat, folding his hands on his chest, but I can’t shake the impression of tension coiled through his body as if he’s poised to pounce.

“I’m so sorry I’ve disappointed you,” he says in a lazy but ominous tone that doesn’t hold a trace of actual regret.

I blink at him. “Pardon?”

“Your displeasure would be obvious to anyone who knows you as well as a husband should know his wife.” Linus tsks his tongue chidingly. “You really bought into everything he sold you.”

Even though I’m still not certain what he’s talking about, a deeper shiver travels through my entire body. “I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean.”

Linus snorts and yanks himself upright again, abruptly enough that I barely contain a flinch. His icy gray gaze bores into mine. “You’d rather have his company. You think he’s the better one. Do you imagine he’s going to save you?”

His question is so patronizing I want to punch him right in his smug face, but the words before it freeze me completely.

You think he’s the better one.

He can’t really be aware—he’s probably just fishing for a reaction—how could he imagine how much I know?

Through sheer force of will, I show nothing but a knitted brow. “I don’t know who you’re talking about, and I don’t appear to need saving at the moment. I can’t imagine whose company I’d rather have than my husband’s.”

Linus flicks his hand to dismiss my words, his attention never leaving me. His harsh chuckle rattles my nerves. “The right husband.” He keeps his voice just quiet enough that I don’t think the guards will be able to hear it over the whir of the carriage wheels. “You don’t have to keep pretending. It makes you look like an idiot. I know everything. I always knew. My brother and I make all our plans together, you stupid, simple sap of a woman.”

My mouth has utterly dried up. I open my mouth, but no words come to me. A choking sensation fills my throat.

Linus leans closer, the manic light I long ago learned to fear flickering in his eyes. His breath hits my cheeks with the force of his low words. “Marc and I decided we’d better see just how loyal you are. Whether you’d stay loyal to both of us, even if you were tempted away. You failed that test so thoroughly, didn’t you? Begging him for help, buttering him up while giving me the cold shoulder.”

“I— That’s not—” My thoughts are still too scattered for me to form a coherent response. If Marc hasn’t been reporting our interactions to his twin—my plea that he attend to my dislocated shoulder, all the compliments I’ve offered him—then how would Linus know?

And if he has… Does that mean everything else Linus is saying is true?

Has it all been one more sick test as I first suspected, meant to jerk my heart around the way they’ve already attempted to break my body and my spirit?

“We planned it from the very beginning,” Linus goes on, all spiteful self-satisfaction. “Couldn’t have a faithless interloper bringing an heir into the family. He’d come to you the moment our positions were confirmed, spin you a tale about how much he hates me and wants me gone, and see if you’d bite. Find out just how far he could turn you against me. It’s pathetic how well it’s worked.”

I manage to find my voice. “I haven’t turned against you.”

I haven’t done anything to him that he could possibly know about. I’ve barely spoken critically of him to Marc.

But I did stop acting as if I wanted Marc to give his brother another chance. I stayed silent when he made his promises to solve that problem for me.

I might not have agreed to help murder his twin, but in their eyes my lack of protest might amount to the same thing. These are men who saw their court’s frustration that they’d sought a bride from abroad as treason enough to justify the torment and murder of their own noblewomen.

Linus scoffs at me. “As if you haven’t sniveled for everyone else’s approval every chance you got. Trying to make yourself look like a martyr when I brought my power to bear. Pathetic.”

For all his sneering, his glare is pure anger. Because so many people have been swayed in my favor?

That’s far more his fault than it is mine, but the details hardly matter now.

I grope for some remark that might appease him. “I only wanted to be the sort of wife you deserve.”

That isn’t even a lie.

Linus only bares his teeth in response. “You’ve been counting the days until we’re home, for whatever you imagine he’s going to do there. What you can actually look forward to is us destroying you. Bit by bit, in every way you deserve, until you wish you’d never dreamed of becoming empress. You hoped you’d get him today instead of me? He sees your failings just as well as I do. He can’t wait to grind you into the dirt you are.”

I push a protest past the strangled sensation that’s spread through my entire chest. “Please. I swear I don’t understand why you’re so upset. I’ve never spoken against either of you. I’ve served you as well as?—”

My husband interrupts me with flippant wave of dismissal. “You had your time. You had months to show what you’re made of, and all you do is simper. Now you know not to bother. You can stew on that for the rest of our journey home. Oh.”

With a short laugh, he produces the Elox-blessed pendant from an inside pocket of his jacket. “You thought he’d convince me to wear this and submit to Elox’s ideals too, didn’t you?”

His gaze flicks toward the patch of forest the road is passing through. In an equally swift motion, he hurls the shining relic off into the brush.

His attention comes back to me. “No tricks. No attempts to meddle with my head. And no more tests. We’ve got our answer. Now all that’s left are the consequences.”