A New Leaf (Hemlock #1)

Chapter 36

Chapter Thirty-Six

Finn

Charlie was practically silent throughout dinner, which put me on high alert. Countless questions raced through my mind because I was hoping we could talk more. After dinner, Charlie insists on helping me clean up, despite me telling her to sit back and relax. We’re standing at my kitchen sink, side by side, shoulders touching like it’s second nature for us, and a thought passes through my mind: I could definitely get used to this. A life where we have dinner together every night, watch mindless TV, and complain about the dogs snoring too loudly. That is the life I want—a life I never imagined myself having. Because, after all these years of drifting and floating from one destination to the next, I’ve always felt unsettled. And now, with her by my side, I finally feel something inside my chest settle.

Maybe home isn’t a place. Maybe home is wherever your person is.

And maybe, just maybe, Charlie is my person.

My heart constricts in my chest with excitement and worry. For over a decade, I’ve felt directionless. Now, after only a few months in Hemlock, I find myself wanting to plant roots here. When I moved back to Oregon, I figured I’d start small with a coffee shop and eventually open a larger location in Portland. But now? I just want to be anywhere Charlie is. Since meeting the woman standing next to me, I can say with the utmost certainty that I haven’t felt alone. Not once.

Elbow deep in dish soap bubbles at the sink, I glance down at Charlie, who is staring out the kitchen window as she dries the roasting pan. Her gaze is distant, with her mind elsewhere.

I wonder what she’s thinking about? Seeing her soft face and unfocused eyes brings me back to reality as my own worries begin to settle inside my mind. Does she feel what I feel? Can she sense the connection we have? Or is she thinking that this is a one-and-done thing?

I’m falling hard for her, and the last thing I want to do is scare her off, but I’ve got to know what’s going on in her mind.

Scrubbing a pot anxiously, I keep my eyes on the bubbles in the sink.

“So . . . whatcha thinking about over there?” I glance over at her, my voice shaking. I’m worried that she doesn’t feel the same way. Worried she’ll think that I’ll eventually drift away from her.

But I know, deep in my soul, that nothing could be further from the truth.

Still drying the pan, a deep sigh breaks free from her lips. “Do you think all birds go south in the winter? Or do you think a few species go into something akin to hibernation? The temperature has really dropped.” Her gaze hasn’t moved from the window, looking outside like she’s entranced by the darkness.

The pot I’m washing slips from my grip and splashes into the sink, spraying us both with soapy water. I erupt in laughter, and Charlie looks at me like I’ve lost my mind.

“Do you know how deep in thought you looked? I was worried about—” I shake my head. “Never mind. I definitely didn’t expect that to be what you were thinking about.”

“What?” Her brows knit together, looking at me, perplexed. “Do you not worry about our bird friends? How thoughtless of you.” She clicks her tongue, smirking at me. Spinning on her heel, she turns to set the dry pan on the counter and then proceeds to soak up the water splatters on the kitchen counter with the towel. “Uh, you said you were worried? About what?”

Picking up another dish, I scrub it slowly, taking the time to figure out how to respond to her question. My head tells me to change the topic, but my heart yells at me to be truthful with her. The dish slips out of my trembling hands, splashing water on both of us . . . again.

“Whoa!” She wipes her forehead with a towel. “Are you okay?” Her hand finds my bicep, giving it a gentle, reassuring squeeze.

“Sorry. I’m sorry. I’m just—” I anxiously rub my wet hand through my hair, which was a dumb move because now I have bubbles in my hair. Turning to her, I rest my hip on the sink, drying my hands off. I’m so nervous, you’d think I’ve never spoken to a woman before. “I . . . Do you . . . You feel this between us, right? Like, I’m not imagining things?” Heat from my chest reaches to the tips of my ears. I shyly look down and then back up at her.

I can’t believe I’m about to ask this.

“Do you like me?” Burning heat shoots from my chest to my cheeks.

I should’ve written her a note that says, Check yes or no if you like me because I like you, and there are perks to dating me!

When those big brown eyes soften, and a gentle smile appears on her face, I feel my head go fuzzy and my heart rate speed up. Charlie reaches toward my forehead, pushing a stray lock of wet hair away from my face, and cups my cheek with her soft hand.

She sighs. “Finn, of course, I like you. How could anyone not like you?”

Nuzzling my cheek into her hand, I close my eyes. “Yes. But . . . that’s not what I?—”

“I know what you meant.” There’s a lightness in her tone of voice. Almost borderline amusement. “Finn, I am, as you know, the worst with words. Which I’m trying to be better about. It’s a frequent topic of conversation with my therapist.”

My eyes snap open with surprise. “You talk to your therapist about me?”

Dropping her hand from my face, she chuckles and leans against the counter, mimicking my pose. “Oh yeah. You’re a hot topic every week. She loves hearing about the adventures of Charlie and Finn.” She pauses. “Those are her words, not mine, by the way.”

“I figured. We can workshop the title at a later date.”

“But, as I was saying, yes, I like you. Yes, I like spending time with you?—”

My shoulders drop. “But you like spending time alone more?—”

She places a delicate finger over my lips, stopping me from speaking. “Yes, I like being alone, with my own company,” she says, before taking a deep breath. The pause she takes before continuing is taking ten years off of my life and giving me an extra twenty gray hairs. “But, even more so, I find myself wanting to be alone with you . And only you. Maybe both dogs in small doses. Mostly just you, though.” Her finger drops from my lips. Turning away from me, she grabs a towel and starts drying another dish. “Just don’t make a big deal out of it or anything, okay?” There’s a playfulness in her voice, matching her cheeky grin. She looks up at me out of the corner of her eye, giving me a reassuring wink.

Clearing my throat, my mock-serious tone does little to hide my excitement. “Yes. Of course. No big deal at all. None. Nada.”

She gives me her signature eye roll, accompanied by a soft laugh. My chest squeezes.

Yes, I could definitely get used to a life like this, with her by my side.

After the dishes are done, we settle down on the couch in my living room. Charlie’s lounging in one corner while I’m on the opposite end. Her legs are stretched out, draped over mine like this is our normal nightly routine. My palm runs slowly up and down her leg as we talk about anything and everything.

“You know what I hate?” she blurts out.

“Knowing you, probably a lot of things,” I joke, and she throws a pillow at my head. “I deserved that,” I add, adjusting my now very crooked glasses.

“You did. But also, yes, you’re right, there are many things I hate. But lately, I despise dress shopping.”

Smirking, I decide to test my luck again. “For the wedding? Or is there another guy you’re trying to impress?” Charlie sits up but, before she can grab the other pillow, I quickly snatch it and throw it across the room. Nodding thoughtfully, I murmur, “Weapons of choice are golf clubs and pillows. Noted. I’ll keep that info tucked away.”

Her head tips back in laughter as she leans back on the couch. Dark hair splays across the cushion, and Charlie has never looked more beautiful. Completely relaxed and at ease, she is utterly breathtaking.

“Sorry, sorry. Dress shopping. Do you want me to help?” I ask her, still casually rubbing my palm up and down her leg.

“Ugh. No. I hate going in-store to shop. So, I ordered a bunch online. I found one that’s acceptable. Now I have to return the rest and I just can’t find the time.” She sighs.

“Want me to return them for you?”

“Huh?” She sits up again, giving me a questioning stare.

“Let me return them for you.” I shrug. “I have to run a few errands anyway. I don’t mind making an extra stop.”

Her large eyes look at me in disbelief. “O-okay. Yeah, that would be great. Thank you,” she says before flopping back down on the couch. “You don’t have to do that for me, though.”

I take off my glasses, setting them on the table. I’m tired of sitting beside her and ache to be closer. When I move to drape my body over her, she laughs softly and opens her legs, letting me comfortably settle in between them.

“Charlie, I want to do it. Okay?”

“Okay,” she whispers.

Charlie’s soothing hands thread through my hair while my head lies on her chest. The steady beating of her heart could lull me to sleep. If I were to die right now, this is how I would want to go. I groan into her chest, directly between her full breasts, wanting to live and breathe in this moment forever.

“You good down there?” she asks playfully.

“I’ve literally never been better,” I muffle into her flannel shirt. When I lift my head to look at her, she gives me an adoring smile. “Actually, I can think of something that would make this better.”

“Oh? What’s that?”

“Oh, I think you know.” I arch a flirtatious brow as I slowly begin to unbutton her flannel. My cock begins to harden as I slowly reveal more of her smooth skin and lace bra with each button I undo.

Confusion washes over her face. “Uh, no. Actually, I don’t. What would make this better?”

I shoot her an incredulous look. “Charlie, you’re actually killing my game here.” She’s still looking at me, utterly confused. I drop my head and exhale before looking up at her again. “Christ, woman. Get upstairs, take your clothes off, and get in my bed.”

“Sorry! I’m not good with subtlety!” She laughs.

“Obviously,” I retort. “We’ll have to work on these subtle cues. I’m trying to be smooth, you know.”

With both hands, Charlie grasps my face, and her deep eyes stare directly into my soul. “You don’t need to try to be sexy. You already are.”

This woman.

She says she’s not good with words but always knows the right thing to say at the right time. Every word she says has intent and genuineness behind it. Charlie speaks with purpose. She won’t tell you what you want to hear. She tells you what you need to hear at that exact moment.

Before I get off of her, I capture her lips with mine, kissing her deep and slow. My hand grasps the side of her neck before my tongue dips inside her mouth, eliciting a soft moan from her. Her parted legs wrap around my hips tightly as she pulls me down even closer to her. The slow kiss turns passionate and feverish. Hands grab at one another’s clothes, teeth nibble on each other’s lips, and breathless moans consume us.

“Upstairs,” I rasp. “Now.” Her chest is heaving while her cheeks are flushed with lust. She simply nods, licking her tenderly swollen lips.

By the time we’ve tumbled onto my bed, our clothes are strewn all over the house, and we’re a tangled mess of limbs. Our lips are hungrily searching for flushed skin while our frantic hands are pulling each other’s warm bodies closer. Shared breaths quivering with desire are the only sounds echoing in the quiet, dim room. I pull back from her and Charlie whimpers at the loss of contact.

“One second, sweetheart,” I say before I drop to my knees before her. “I have to make sure you’re ready for me first.” With a single swipe of my tongue up her center, she cries out, gripping my hair and pushing my face into her more.

I love it when she takes control like this. Nothing makes me harder than this woman getting what she wants.

I keep working her with my tongue, occasionally sucking her clit before inserting two fingers into her and curling them, reaching for that perfect spot that makes her legs buckle.

“Fuck. That feels so good,” she pants, grinding herself into me with unabashed fervor.

“Take everything you need, Charlie. Use me,” I urge, my voice thick with desire.

Charlie’s moans fill the air as she reaches her peak. I can feel her release building inside of her as she writhes against my mouth. She uses me until she comes undone on my tongue in a shuddering release. Now, all I can think about is how desperate I am to be inside her.

I grab a condom from the nightstand, using my teeth to tear open the package and slide it on. Kneeling above her, I trap Charlie beneath me with my arms on either side of her head. My eyes fall to the rapid rise and fall of her flushed chest as she revels in the aftermath of her orgasm.

Lost in her beauty, I look down at her, taking in Charlie’s pink cheeks, bright eyes, and upturned lips.

I absolutely adore this woman.

Claiming her lips in a possessive kiss, I gently take her plump bottom lip between my teeth. “You ready for me, sweetheart?”

Those big brown eyes look into mine with a desired plea. “Please.”

All it takes is that one word and I sink into her. Her legs instinctively wrap around me, my cock pulsing inside her. Charlie’s breathy moan fills the room as I drop my head to the crook of her neck, groaning at the feel of how warm and soft she is beneath me.

Buried deep inside her, my thrusts start out slowly but Charlie grabs my hips, encouraging me to quicken my pace. We’re suspended in this dreamlike moment with feverish kisses, moans of pleasure, and soft whispers of encouragement. Don’t stop. You feel too good. Your body was made for me. You’re perfect .

As her legs lock tighter around my hips, she pulls my body in closer. The heat of our bodies only intensifies the desperate need we’re both feeling. My muscles flex as my cock slides deeper inside of her, savoring every sensation. I glide my hand down to brush my fingers over her swollen clit, rubbing soft circles. Charlie’s back arches off the bed, and her lips part and cheeks flush in anticipation.

She’s almost there.

I can feel her pussy clenching around my cock, pulsing with desire as she moans. My fingers never leave her clit as her body shudders, letting the pleasure consume her as she falls apart. A surge of heat shoots down my spine, my body trembling as we move in perfect rhythm. I bury my face into her neck, reveling in the way she feels.

Every sense is heightened to new extremes. Her wet heat, soft body, and whimpers overwhelm me in the most intoxicating, alluring way. My lips press up against that tender spot behind her ear with force, breathing in her skin like I need it to survive.

With her name on my lips, I come harder than ever before, leaving me breathless.

I will never be able to get enough of this woman.