13. Rowan
CHAPTER 13
ROWAN
M onday morning came and brought with it an air of disappointment. I’d half expected Gil to show up at my door again. I thought about going to his house with some manufactured excuse or another, but between getting Fisher ready for his first day, tearing up my bathroom floor, and dealing with a hot water tank that suddenly bit the bullet, my weekend had gotten away from me.
Taking a final glance at myself in the mirror, I straightened my bowtie, and smoothed down a flyaway hair that immediately sprang back out of place. I gave up on the hair and went to the kitchen.
Fisher stood in front of the coffee maker and poured two cups. One for me, one for him. Drinking coffee was a new thing he’d decided to do, probably to feel older. Though maybe he actually liked it. He took less sugar in his than I did in mine.
“Ready for your first day?” I asked.
Fisher cut me one of his signature surly teenager side-eyes.
“Right, sorry. Of course you’re ready. You were born ready. Right, Fish?”
“Please, no small talk, Dad.” Fisher took a sip of his coffee.
“I’m allowed to make small talk,” I contested as I stirred a third spoonful of sugar into my coffee. “It’s my job as your dad to be as cringe as possible.”
Fisher wrinkled his nose. “Don’t say cringe.”
“Why not? Is it cringe when I say it?”
Fisher rolled his eyes and I mentally tallied up a point for me.
“Are you sure you don’t want a ride?”
“I’ll bike, thanks. By the way, Gil said you need to buy an Andrew—Allen wrench. My calipers keep coming loose.”
“What’s a—never mind. Find the one you need and send me a link and I’ll order it.”
Fisher mumbled something that I didn’t catch, but I’d run out of time to interrogate him about it. Besides, I’d learned that some of his mumbles weren’t meant for me.
“I have to run, but if you need me, I’ll have my cell on.”
Was I nervous about Fisher’s first day at a new school in a new city? Absolutely. My nerves for his first day eclipsed the ones I had about my own. At least they had until I got in the car and backed out of the driveway. I went the long way around rather than pass by Gil’s house.
In general, I liked what I did for a living. Was it glamorous? Not especially. There wasn’t much glitz and glamor being a mortgage broker. But I was good at what I did and the firm I’d been transferred to was part of the same company I’d worked for back home. But their smaller offices were having trouble keeping people. The lure of big city living often drew people away.
Mosaic Mortgages was just off Main Street nestled between a little mom-and-pop style pizza place and a tattoo shop. We were situated just down from the banks, which occupied three out of four corners of an intersection. Employee parking was around back and I navigated the narrow alleyway to the lot behind the building. Jenny, the office manager, had told me to text her when I arrived and she’d let me in.
My phone pinged with a text. Fisher had sent me a selfie of himself outside his new school. The text that accompanied it said proof of life . Fisher wasn’t smiling in the picture, but that wasn’t unusual for him. My heart twisted at that and I sent a silent wish out into the universe. Maybe something would come along that would change that for him. I could only hope.
I sent my new boss Jenny a quick text, letting her know I was out back and I climbed out of the car with my messenger bag in hand. It had my work computer in it and though I hadn’t touched it since I moved, it felt kind of nice to be getting into a proper routine again.
Jenny, despite the youthful name, turned out to be a woman pushing sixty with silver hair piled on top of her head in an artful, slightly messy bun. Her glasses were thick and a sparkly chain connected to each arm and ran behind her neck. She waved me inside and greeted me with a handshake. Jenny, even in heels, was at least a head shorter than I was.
“Rowan Verne, it’s so good to meet you in person. I’ll give you the grand tour and show you to your little corner of our office and let you get settled in before I feed you to the wolves.”
“We have a lovely client base, Jenny. Don’t listen to her.” A deep voice had me turning my head. It belonged to a man who had long legs and a short, neatly trimmed beard.
“I was talking about you, Morgan. Morgan Sergeant, this is Rowan Verne, our newest broker. Don’t scare him away.”
Morgan put his hand over his heart. “You wound me, Jenny.” He extended his hand toward me. “It’s good to meet you, Rowan.”
“Thanks.”
“Don’t listen to a word she says about me.” Morgan pulled his hand away and tucked it in his pocket.
“It’s all true,” Jenny shot back with a smile.
“That’s precisely why he shouldn’t listen.” Morgan threw me a grin, then turned his attention to Jenny. “Mel called out sick and she had a full schedule today.”
“Fuck.” Jenny cut a look to me and grimaced. “Sorry, I try to curb the potty talk, but this puts me in a tight spot.”
“I might be new to the office, but I’m not new. I can probably get myself up to speed enough to tackle her schedule. It wasn’t like I had much planned for today besides picking what side of the desk I want my stapler on.” It was going to be a trial by fire, that was certain, but there was no better way to keep my mind off Fisher and his first day, and Gil and the fact that I hadn’t seen him all weekend. The distraction was welcome.
“Can you get him set up and bring him up to speed on Mel’s clients, and I’ll give them a call and see if any want to reschedule?” Jenny didn’t wait for him to answer before she disappeared around the corner.
“When Jenny gives an order, it might sound like a question, but it’s not,” Morgan offered, then motioned for me to follow him. “I’ll give you the speed-run tour.” Morgan was definitely younger than me. Maybe twenty-five or so. Maybe thirty with an amazing skin care routine.
When he said speed-run, he wasn’t joking. The whole tour took about two minutes and I knew later I’d know where exactly nothing was. But then we were suddenly in my office. Before I transferred, I hadn’t had an office. I had a glorified cubicle.
I no sooner sat down at my desk that Morgan fired up my computer. “Your work laptop will be good for when you’re working from home, but you’re not connected to this office yet. It’ll be faster today if you use this.” He brought up the main screen and then backed away. “Your username is your first and last name and your password is pineapple. You’ll have to change that when you log in, but Jenny had me set you up in the system last week so you’d be ready to go.”
I logged in and then Morgan showed me where to access Mel’s cases. All the clients' information could be accessed by any of the brokers.
“It should be straight forward. I’ll be right across the hall if you need anything. Or you can dial me directly by pressing the pound key, then eight-eight-seven. Jenny is five-five-four.”
“And if things go really south, I can always dial nine-one-one.”
Morgan cracked a smile and patted me on the back. His hand lingered on my shoulder for a second before he pulled it away. “I think you’ll fit in just fine, Rowan. Welcome to Mosaic.”
He knocked on the doorframe as he exited, which was weird when I thought about it. People usually knocked on their way into a room.
Pushing thoughts of anything else aside, I got to work.
Mel’s schedule had been jammed, but Jenny managed to reschedule a couple appointments for the following day. I nearly worked through lunch, but Morgan stopped in with a calzone from the pizza place and an iced coffee. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that I thought iced coffee was the devil. The fact that he’d thought of me was sweet.
By the time the workday wrapped up, I was dead on my feet and eager to hear from Fisher, who hadn’t texted since his proof of life picture that morning. Jenny and Morgan caught up to me on my way out and she apologized for my first day being a shit show, then she apologized again for swearing. With a promise that tomorrow would be three hundred percent less hectic, she let Morgan and me go.
“How about a first day drink?” Morgan asked. “It’s on me.”
“Actually, I have to get home to my kid. His first day at a new school was today and I want to see how it went.”
“You have a kid? How old?”
“Almost thirteen, going on twenty five. He’s starting seventh grade.”
“Is he an only child or do you and the missus have a whole herd of ankle-biters?”
“Just one. Uh… the missus is…” I grimaced whenever I had to tell people about Fisher’s mom. “She passed away.”
“Fuck. Sorry. Shit. Ah, right. So, you need to get home and I need to find a hole to crawl into.” Pink climbed high on Morgan’s cheeks, making his brown eyes stand out.
“That’s not necessary, I promise.”
Morgan ran a hand through his hair, making him look somewhat like a sheepish boy-next-door. “Maybe I can get a raincheck on that drink?”
“Maybe.” I said, promising him nothing. “Thanks for lunch today, though.”
Morgan beamed, flashing the hint of a dimple. “You’re welcome.”
It felt like it took an eternity to get home, and this time I didn’t avoid driving past Gil’s house. Not that it did any good. The garage door was shut and there was no sign of him outside. It made me feel slightly stalkerish when I realized I’d slowed down to gawk.
I wasn’t obsessed. I was just… curious whether or not he’d fled the country to avoid me. He hadn’t bothered to come over again after last time. And it shouldn’t have bothered me, especially because I also hadn’t drummed up the courage to go to his place.
Before I went inside, I walked to the mailbox at the end of the driveway and fished around inside for whatever had been delivered. The envelope wasn’t addressed to anyone, but when I opened it, there was no mistaking that it was meant for me. A health clinic address was printed at the top, and below that was Gil’s name and his sexual health test results.
Negative across the board.
The paper shook in my hand and I hastily shoved it back in the envelope. What did this mean? Did it mean he was done with me and just wanted me to know he hadn’t put me at risk? Did it mean he wanted a repeat? It definitely meant that I should have also been tested and shame flooded me for not thinking of it sooner. I hadn’t been with anyone since Lisa, though. Honestly, I didn’t see the need, but it was what a responsible person would do.
First, I’d get my results, then I’d talk to Gil.