7. Liam
Chapter 7
Liam
L iam did his level best not to think of Fix. But pushing Fix out of his mind left him overly focused on the only other thing that was as impactful in his life.
The mystery curser.
He couldn’t get the suspicions out of his head. Was one of his followers truly the one responsible? He’d found himself hesitating for the first time before he’d logged onto his profile and posted a quick photo of three brand-new costumes he’d made just for the occasion.
It’s your choice tonight. Take your pick.
The comments started flying in instantly, with the people arguing over the costumes and which one would look best on Liam. Just like always. Nothing seemed out of place.
His favorite one won in the poll, and Liam put on the pink thong, short, pleated skirt with a lacy trim, and cropped jacket, pink and lavender lace and satin feeling decadent on his naked skin. He had the lights dimmed almost completely, a scent diffuser set to make his room smell like chocolate, and his black satin sheet draped across the bed.
The camera was pointed toward the bed and the frame was set just the way Liam liked it best, so his face was slightly in the shadows and the more interesting parts of him caught the soft light just so. Liam knew his angles. He knew how to do his job and do it well. If this were any other day, he’d have felt a tiny little thrill just before the stream started.
He knew people usually thought all sex workers did it because they were desperate. Liam disagreed. He actually liked being on camera. He liked performing. Liked the reactions from people and the rush that came with knowing how he was affecting people.
But this wasn’t just any stream. This was the first time Liam was going to be acutely aware of every person tuning in to watch him. Wondering. Guessing. Suspecting. Fix had said he couldn’t be certain of anything without more evidence. It might not be related to his job at all…
But it could be.
That was the gut-churning thing. He’d been living with curses for years knowing someone hated him enough to keep casting them. He’d gotten used to compartmentalizing. It wasn’t new.
The flowers were.
As he sat on his bed, his stomach turned. Not from the usual pre-performance jitters, but because now the misery of his life had a real shape. It was looming, threatening and possibly dangerous.
And Liam could be baring himself in front of it.
He had no idea who this person was, or why they were doing this to him. He could have simply passed them in the street. He could have slept with them recently or years ago. He could have dated them for months. Maybe they’d found out about him the same way Cane had. Maybe Cane hadn’t just given Fix his information.
Maybe all of this could be completely unrelated, and he could be working himself into a tangled mess for nothing.
There was no way to know, and it was driving him insane.
He tried to push it aside. He needed to work and couldn’t let this stop him, but the discomfort was like an unwanted guest in the room with him.
For a split second his mind made him think that maybe Fix had lied to him. Maybe he would look him up and see this stream. Maybe he was waiting for it to start just like everyone else. An unknown username among so many others.
It sent a shiver down his spine. He hoped Fix hadn’t been lying, but he…he wanted Fix to see. Maybe if he hadn’t been a coward he could have invited Fix to watch in person.
The thought made him squirm.
He got himself up on his knees in the middle of the bed and sat back on his heels. He looked down his body, hair loose and wavy around his shoulders. People liked when he wore it down. They liked it long and flowing around his head while he touched himself.
He wondered if Fix would. If he’d wrap it around his fingers when he kissed him. He wondered if he’d pull and position Liam’s head where he wanted it. He wondered if he’d know how to give Liam everything the others didn’t.
The thing was, Liam was mostly desire underneath all the barriers he erected. A dirty mind and a pretty body. He liked ideas. Liked the pretty pictures he created in his head and bringing them to life in the safety of his solitude. Bringing someone else into it had proven to be a bad move in the past. It never ended well for him. People took more than he offered. More than he was willingly giving.
And yet, his cock was straining the lacy thong he was in, and for the first time his own fingers on his nipples felt too soft. Too gentle. He pinched harder but it didn’t feel right. He didn’t really know what ‘right’ would feel like since Fix had never touched him, but he couldn’t help convincing himself it wouldn’t be what he was used to.
He ran his hands down his torso and plunged the tips of his fingers under the waistband of the short, pleated skirt he was wearing, teasing himself to keep his cock hard for the start of the stream. He didn’t want to drag it out tonight. He was too distracted.
He glanced at the clock and realized he was only seconds away from starting, so he took a deep breath and forced himself to sink into his head.
Fix’s shadow was still lingering. The rumble of his voice echoing in his head. The warmth of those eyes making him feel safe. Liam realized he wouldn’t be able to get him out no matter what he tried, so he watched the seconds on his timer run out and allowed the cursebreaker to stay.
The screen lit up, his chat filled with people instantly, and Liam turned into someone he probably wouldn’t recognize if he met him on the street.
His online persona was bold, seductive, a fatale. He was desired by people and he reveled in it. He could play them the way he wanted to and make them pay to see more.
“Welcome,” he whispered when the influx of people joining his stream slowed down and evened out.
Usernames flashed by his eyes, and he tried not to get fixated on committing them all to memory. Fix would figure it out. He needed to trust that.
“Like I said today in the announcement, today is your choice so I won’t be doing anything until you tell me what you’d like to see,” he said, watching as the comments went wild with people suggesting things.
He listened to some, just to get himself and them in the mood. He touched his hair, ran his fingers all over his body. Licked his thumbs and circled them over his nipples. Moaned louder. Threw his head back.
He allowed himself to get lost in it. He let his cock spring up from his skirt until the tip was visible over the edge of the lacy trim. He teased them and himself. It felt good. His small, dark room made his voice echo nicely. The dim lights made everything feel more heightened. More real.
He reached down and cupped his erection, circling his hips into his palm and whining at the friction.
More daring suggestions started trickling in. They wanted him naked. Spread open. Fucking himself on a dildo. They wanted him to gag himself. To cuff himself to his bedpost. So many things. Some more depraved than others. Some he’d never dream of doing on a stream. Some he wanted to save for himself.
A donation bigger than the rest came in, past the threshold Liam mentally held for requests that usually decided the night’s turn.
WatchingYou8635: Turn your back to the camera, straddle your pillow, ride it.
WatchingYou8635: You look beautiful tonight, btw.
Liam cringed at the words but did his best to hide it. His light was turned toward his bed, making everything behind the camera dark and empty looking. He knew nothing was there, but it didn’t matter.
But this was his job, so he slowly reached out, making sure to sway his hips as he went, and gripped one of the pillows lying at the edge of his bed. He pulled it closer and ran a hand over the smooth black satin.
“This pillow?” he asked, quirking a brow at the camera. It was clear WatchingYou8635 realized his request had been picked.
Another donation.
WatchingYou8635: Your skin looks incredible against the black.
Liam smiled and tucked the pillow between his spread legs, hesitating for a second before he turned his back to the camera.
Over his shoulder he licked his lips and let his lids hood his eyes.
“You want me to ride it?” he asked, and the chat went wild with messages and donations.
Come like that.
Paint the black with your cum.
Be loud.
Take the skirt off.
No leave it on.
Liam paid them no mind because WatchingYou8635 wanted him to stay clothed, lean forward until he was on all fours, and ride the pillow until he came.
It was a weirdly tame request mixed in among the wild ones, and he was grateful this was something he actually enjoyed doing from time to time. As a reprieve from the kind of sex he most enjoyed. He liked how gentle it felt to get off like that after hours of being pushed to his limits, body aching and exhausted.
He glanced back at the chat and froze at the next message.
WatchingYou8635: I know you love getting off like that, beautiful.
Words like that usually made Liam shiver. Because it was true.
But paranoia began to niggle in the back of his brain. Did this person actually know that? Dread filled him and he felt his erection flag slightly.
It was stupid.
People typed things like that hundreds of times in so many interactions. ‘You know you love it, dirty slut.’ ‘Daddy knows you like it like that.’ ‘You can’t get enough.’
These people were paying to direct him. To push their fantasies onto him to act out.
He just couldn’t get out of his head tonight.
He wanted to end it. Wanted to cut it short and just hide, but this was his livelihood. He had bills to pay and food to buy and a dog to keep happy. He liked his job.
He scrambled to find a comment that would suggest something that would turn him on again. Something to save the stream from being a total bust. He didn’t know how to save this. He wished someone was there. He wished someone was watching over him from the dark and making sure nobody could hurt him.
He wanted Fix there.
He tightened his thighs around the pillow between them. Turned his head to the side and stared at the corner of his room. There was a chair there. Empty now, but…
What if Fix was sitting there?
Liam could sit on his lap. He could spread his legs and sit on top of Fix wearing nothing but his black thong.
His hips would roll into Fix’s clothed ones, and he’d be hard for him. He’d grip Liam’s waist hard enough to bruise, bite his neck and leave marks there so everyone could see Liam was his. He’d cup his ass in his hands and help rub his cock against Fix. He’d growl in his ear. Tell him what to do. Tell him to go slow, tease himself. He’d be everything Liam wanted.
He closed his eyes and lost himself in his fantasy. He rode his pillow listening to the little zings of his stream as people commented on his performance. But Liam wasn’t there anymore.
He was inside his mind where Fix was branding his skin with his touch, leaving red marks on him with his lips, making him feel like he was the most perfect human who’d ever lived when he looked at him with those kind eyes.
He pretended he could feel Fix’s beard on his neck, his chest. On the inside of his thighs. He imagined Fix was sliding his hands underneath the string between Liam’s cheeks to find his hole. He’d press inside him and the pain would play with pleasure. It would make Liam whine and beg for more.
He’d set the pace, just like Liam liked it. Hard and fast. Brutal. He’d hold his arms behind his back so he couldn’t touch himself while his fingers split him in half. He’d make Liam desperate for release. Make him squirm. Make him sob and beg and scream.
He clenched his fists into the pillow and rode it faster. He felt himself getting closer. So close.
He bore down harder, and with a few final thrusts he was spilling milky white over the black satin.
Legs crossed at the ankles, shirtsleeves unbuttoned and pushed up to reveal those huge, tattooed forearms. Arms Liam longed to be wrapped in.
The chat went crazy.
The money trickled in.
People complimented and praised and asked for more.
But Liam was still in his head.
Slumped against Fix’s chest. Breathing hard into his neck. Vulnerable and spent but completely safe in his arms.
People began to log off as he remained inactive, some complaining about how fast it was, which drove Liam into action. He thanked the people and tied his robe around himself as he ended the chat, making sweet promises for more next time.
And then he collapsed back on his bed with his eyes closed, groaning.
He needed to get a handle on this quickly before he tanked everything he had built for himself.