Chapter 18
Chapter Eighteen
River
“What’s gone up your ass?” JD asked as the two of us walked around the venue to take a look while the truck was being unloaded. I was still pissed at Kit from our argument about his hesitance to do anything more sexual than hand jobs.
“I’ve never asked,” I prefaced before getting into JD’s private business, “but are you gay or straight?”
JD’s face froze for an instant before he started laughing. “I see no need to limit myself. Why?”
“Have you been with guys?”
“Yes, and again I ask why you think you have the right to ask me about my sexuality.”
I sighed. I sounded like an uptight asshole. “I’m sorry. I’m having a crisis of faith.”
“Excuse us,” Allen said as he pushed by us with a cart hauling speakers and microphone equipment.
We moved toward the bar at the other side of the venue, pulling two stools down from their spots on the bar top and taking a seat. “So, Kit and I are involved as you saw the other day, which is great, but there are some issues in the sex department. Have you ever given a guy a blowjob?”
JD smirked. “Yeah, but I’m not giving you one.”
“Ha-ha, funny man. I’m talking about Kit. I’ve given him a few, but he’s never reciprocated—or even tried. He’s never been with a guy, and I’m afraid he pretends I’m a woman when we get down and dirty—well, mildly dusty, I guess.”
“Have you fucked?” JD asked.
“What do you think? I’ve never bottomed, and he’s never been with a guy. He ain’t giving up his ass anytime soon.”
JD stared at me. “Is that all your relationship is about? Who gets fucked and who does the fucking? Sounds pretty shallow to me.”
As he said it, I realized he was right. Everything we did together was great. As long as we pleased each other, did the other stuff matter?
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
“Look, the last guy I dated—and I dated him for almost a year before he moved back east to go to grad school—we didn’t fuck.
He was a side and didn’t like ass play. I like it, but I enjoyed the other things we did, so it was fine with me that he didn’t want to be penetrated, nor did he want to penetrate anyone else.
“Hell, if the band hadn’t hit when it did, I’d have moved to Boston with him. I really care about him, but he put school ahead of our relationship, so I think I felt more for him than he did for me,” JD explained.
I was surprised. We’d been friends since our fathers were in From the Ashes together. “Does your dad know you’re bi?” I asked.
“Yeah. Ripper’s not a closed-minded asshole like Regal.
Anyway, I’ve learned the only way to work through problems in a relationship is to communicate, so communicate with your man.
Icing him out won’t get you anywhere.” JD stood, flipped the stool back onto the bar top, and walked back to the stage.
As I was about to get up, Kit came into the venue. He put his hands on his hips and scanned the area until his eyes landed on me. He headed in my direction, and I took a deep breath.
“How was the ride on the bus?” Kit asked.
“Agonizing. I couldn’t sleep, and the others passed out the minute they hit the bunks. How was it riding by yourself?” The tension in my voice could be cut with a knife.
“Lonely. Even if you sleep while I’m driving, I still know you’re there.
I hate this. Look, it’s not that I don’t want to suck you off.
I’m just not sure I’ll be any good at it.
I never want to disappoint you.” His hand reached out to take mine, but he pulled back at the last second and shoved it in the pocket of his jeans.
If we were going to have a relationship that was good for both of us, we had to be equals.
I stood and pulled his hand from his pocket, holding it between both my hands.
“I’m sorry I was such an ass. Of course you have to take time to get comfortable with things.
This is all new to you, and I’m being unfair. I’m sorry.”
“Come here, please.” He pulled me closer and wrapped his arms around me, which immediately put me at ease.
He kissed my temple and whispered in my ear, “I want you very much, and I want to suck your cock, but I’m intimidated.
You have me nearly comatose when you finish with me, and I’m not sure I’ll be able to give you the same experience.
But there’s no way in hell I ever think of you as a woman.
You’re a gorgeous man who holds my heart.
Please, I’m begging you, don’t break it. ”
Kit lifted my chin with his index finger and kissed my lips, pushing his tongue inside and swirling it with mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on. He pressed his cock against mine, and I wanted to slide my hand into his pants.
“C-Can you come out to the truck for a few minutes?” Kit asked against my lips.
“Fuck yeah.”
We hurried out of the venue and nearly ran to the red Peterbilt.
Kit unlocked the door, and I climbed up, with him coming behind me.
He locked the doors from the inside and pulled down a large shade mounted over the dashboard.
He closed the ones on each side window, and then he hurried into the sleeper with me.
Kit knelt in front of me and took my hands. “You know what I like, but I don’t know what you like. Please, show me how to make you soar—I mean, fly, not in pain.”
I laughed as he reached for the waistband of my shorts. I lifted my ass to let him pull them down, having not bothered with underwear earlier. Once my dick was out, his warm breath blew over the head, sending shivers down my spine.
“You don’t have to try to take it to the—”
His lips sealed over my cock, and his tongue caressed the underside and the crown.
I gasped at the unbelievable sensation. Kit bobbed up and down like a sewing machine needle, so I put my hands on his beautiful hair to slow him down.
When he gagged because he went down too far, I whispered, “Don’t choke yourself, please. It feels incredible.”
He slowed down and licked my cock like an ice cream as his hand moved to my balls and began massaging. “Oh god, yes. Just like that.”
My heart pounded as my sac tingled. I knew I was about to explode. “Baby, I’m gonna come.”
Kit hummed around me, and I nearly jumped to the ceiling as the pleasure overtook me.
“Fuck, yeah,” I yelled as I began shooting cum into his mouth.
He swallowed as much as he could, but a little leaked out, so I took my fingers and wiped it from the corners of his mouth before licking my fingers clean.
I pulled him to stand and opened his jeans to passionately lick and kiss and love him so that he never doubted me. His thick member warmed on my tongue, so I sucked harder and tried his little humming trick before I caressed behind his balls.
His salty fluid filled my mouth, and I drank it down like a hungry man as he balanced himself with his hands on my head. I lifted his shirt and planted kisses and nibbles on his abs and down his treasure trail before kissing his cockhead.
Kit pulled me up and kissed me deeply, our flavors mixing in both of our mouths. Someone pounded on the truck door, and we broke the kiss. Both of us laughed at our state of undress.
“Just a minute,” Kit called out to whoever was outside.
We quickly adjusted our clothes, and Kit went to the passenger-side door and lifted the shade before he started laughing as he lowered the window. “What can I do for you, Rowdy?”
“Are you holding the lead guitar player hostage? There’s been some shouting coming from the truck. Do I need to investigate?”
I stepped forward and bent so Rowdy could see me through the open window. “I’m just fine. What’s up?”
“The guys want to run through tonight’s set list if you’re able to move.”
Kit and I both laughed. “We’ll be there in a minute.” He slid the window up and pulled me to sit in his lap. “How’d I do?”
I took his handsome face in both of my hands. “Wonderful. How was it? As bad as you thought it would be?”
His gaze met mine. “It was fantastic. Your taste is addicting, I’m afraid. I don’t know what plans you have for the break, but will you come home with me? I’ll teach you to surf.”
I had no desire to learn to surf, but being with him for two weeks was like a gift I hadn’t thought I’d ever get. I wasn’t sure it was one I deserved. “I’d love to go home with you.”
Dockweiler Beach
I sat on a grass mat with my guitar on my lap, simply staring out at the waves as they lapped at the shore. Kit was sitting in the water astride a surfboard that he said he’d had since he was sixteen. He was wearing a black wetsuit that hugged every inch of his body and gave me a raging hard-on.
We had returned from Boise on Thursday afternoon, having decided to sleep in Boise on Wednesday night after the show. Kit and I had gone to a diner not far from the venue and got some food while the tour bus and the entourage left to make the drive back to LA ahead of us.
The food at Sue-Bee’s Diner wasn’t five-star, but I’d been with Kit, and we’d had an amazing time. We’d slept in the truck in the Treefort’s parking lot, and Thursday morning, after we were well-rested, we’d driven back to Los Angeles.
Our first stop had been to drop off Kit’s truck at Sound Wave Studios, where it would be safe until we began part two of the tour, and then Mr. Ashby drove us to Kit’s cottage on the beach. “I’ll see you on Friday, guys. We’ll have a family dinner and talk about how the tour’s going.”
Kit hugged him, and then I’d done the same. We’d grabbed our bags from the trunk and walked hand in hand into a small cottage that felt like home to me in an instant.
Cold water! “Stop!”
Kit laughed, shaking his long hair at me like a wet dog and pulling me from my warm thoughts of the cottage. “You sure you don’t want to try? I can take you out, and you can stay seated. It’s fun. I promise.” He pointed to his surfboard resting on the sand.
I placed my guitar beside me and pulled Kit onto the mat to kiss him. When we broke apart, he smiled. “Can you not swim? I’ll teach you.”
I laughed. “I can swim just fine, thank you.”
Kit looked up and down the beach before he moved onto his hands and knees. “Nobody’s out here. How about I go down on you, and then you go out with me on the board?”
“Oh, are you trying to bribe me, Mr. Hansen?”
“Only if it works. Otherwise, I’m simply asking for what I want.”
I kissed him for that, and I couldn’t contain the words any longer. “I love you, Christopher Hansen.” He didn’t have to say it back. I just had to let him know about the overwhelming feelings churning inside me.
Kit pressed his forehead to mine. “That’s beautiful to hear from your gorgeous mouth.” He then pulled back to meet my gaze. “And I love you, River Ashe.”
I was flying. Words circled my brain that I had to get onto paper before I lost them.
I sent him back out one last time, grabbed my ever-present notebook and pencil, and I wrote.
“Three Words”
Nothing more to say
Only things to feel
No time left for doubt
Three words that can reveal
We’ve wandered all our lives
Taken wrong turns left and right
Until the day you crossed my path
And I finally saw the light
Words can hurt
Words can heal
Three words were all it took
To know your love is real
We stare into the future
The two of us, side by side
And when our time is over
It’s all been worth the ride
Words can hurt
Words can heal
Three words was all it took
To know our love is real