Chapter Twenty-Two
‘And he kissed me outside, on the steps, as if it was a done deal.’ Scarlett recounted the story of Todd’s surprise visit to Louisa, the horror of it still physically sickening her.
They had already discussed Sky and the new revelations at great length, to the point where Scarlett felt more capable of dealing with his death and betrayal. Knowing that he hadn’t been true to her seemed to lay the constant shadow of Sky to rest. Bluntly, he wasn’t worth the anguish.
She tried to smile at Elsa who sidled over, calmly lining up her teddy bears on the windowsill before giving them a stern talking to, wagging her finger at each of them in turn.
Scarlett wondered what terrible misdemeanour they’d committed to deserve such a telling off. ‘Poor teddies,’ she whispered to her sister. She was about to find out.
‘You don’t do drugs, okay? Or else you will all die.’
Louisa and Scarlett gave each other wide-eyed, horrified stares.
‘I’m so sorry, guess I should be more careful around her,’ Scarlett was mortified that their conversation had been taken on board so thoroughly by Elsa.
‘Don’t worry she was telling them about the dangers of vaping the other day, I don’t think it’s you. It’s all around us these days. Anyway you should hear how she harangues her dolls for their tardiness. It’s terrifying. Has me standing to attention, I tell you.’
‘Born teacher, I reckon.’ Scarlett grinned, as Elsa, apparently forgiving the teddies, held up pieces of broken biscuit to their stitched mouths and made nom-nomnoises.
‘You should have kneed him in the nuts,’ her sister said, steering back to the topic of conversation. ‘I told you to watch him, didn’t I?’
Scarlett couldn’t even bring herself to tell her the details of Todd’s kiss. ‘It was truly gross. I could handle him before, but now he has something on me, I don’t know what to do. I’m pretty sure he’s blown this entire story up out of nothing to try and control me. I really don’t think the board give a stuff that I omitted to tell them about Sky. It’s bad enough, finding out that Sky was a lowdown, lying rat, without being held up to ridicule by anyone who cares to read the book. I can’t believe how gullible I was.’ She grabbed her wine glass and took a hefty swig. ‘And I miss Dylan. Why did I storm off the way I did? My stupid pride. What a mess.’
Her eyes filled with tears again as she recalled Sky’s betrayal. She’d grieved for a man who’d only existed in her mind. The real Sky was a philandering liar who hadn’t deserved her loyalty and love. He’d had a child that she knew nothing about.
Her emotions bounced all over the place. She missed Dylan and hated Todd and inexplicably felt bad that Sky had a daughter who would grow up never knowing her father. She should have realised how bad his drug problem was. She should have helped him. ‘What am I going to do?’ She turned to her sister.
‘Do you really want an answer to that question, or are you just thinking out loud? Because if you are asking my opinion, I think, firstly, you need to get hold of Dylan to apologise, and secondly, you need to find a new job.’
‘What! He should apologise to me. He was so angry.’
Louisa shook her head. ‘You were probably just as moody in return, you’re your own worst enemy, sometimes, love.’ She refilled her own wine glass and Scarlett’s, wincing when her gaze skimmed towards the clock. It was still only five o’clock, and they’d drunk a bottle between them. ‘We should eat something.’ She rummaged in the food cupboard and then opened the fridge door and peered inside. ‘The best I can come up with is some mini Cheddars and a chunk of Red Leicester, but there is more wine.’
Scarlett nodded, gulped back her wine and held out her glass to be refilled. ‘Great . . . lovely. Have you seen Dylan, at all?’ She barely noticed her sister filling her glass once more, she was so preoccupied with their conversation.
‘No, I don’t see him in the park anymore. Haven’t seen him for a month, or so.’
Scarlett’s face fell. ‘Me, neither. He’s not at the pub either and I keep circling the lake in the hope of bumping into him. I even bought a pair of cute walking boots to pretend I liked walking.’ She sighed. ‘I think he’s moved out of his house, too. He said he was going to, because it was a tip and he didn’t want me to have to stay there.’ She sighed with sadness at what might have been.
‘How do you know he’s moved?’ Louisa asked.
‘Bit of random sleuthing — well, staking out the place, really until there was clearly no sign of him, coming or going,’ Scarlett said, giving her sister the closest thing to a smile she could manage. ‘That only leaves Southwold and the pub, and everyone there likely hates me. And if he’s going to tell me what a cow I am, I’d rather he did it without bystanders. I’ve been humiliated enough recently.’
‘Why don’t you just phone him?’
‘Because.’
‘Because, what?’
‘Because I blocked him and then deleted his number. And yes I wish I hadn’t but it’s too late for regrets.’
‘You are a stubborn idiot sometimes.’
This time Scarlett couldn’t raise a smile, at all. ‘I know.’ Her voice was small as she shrugged. ‘I read an article about him in one of the gossip magazines that he’s bringing out an album sometime this year. He will probably have forgotten my name by now. He’ll have moved on to dating rich, nubile beauties — and I’m still not sure I could bear to go through all that stardom shit again, anyway.’ Her voice wobbled with disappointment. She felt so bad about it all.
‘He’s not Sky, Scarlett. He’s a different man. A good man.’
‘I know. He said that. And he said I was beautiful, and he was really sincere about us and I disappeared out of his life at the first sign of trouble.’ She bit her lip as tears spilt over her lashes.
‘Come on, love.’ Louisa pulled her into her arms and hugged her. ‘You’ll get through this. You’re stronger than you think.’
‘I know I will, but I don’t want to. I just want him to want me, like he used to,’ she wailed.
‘Then, at least find him and see what he has to say. Give him a chance to make it right.’
Scarlett brightened a bit. ‘I could ask at the pub, I suppose. Mac and Stanley might know where he is.’
‘Absolutely. Go and find him.’
Scarlett sniffed and wiped her eyes. ‘Perhaps I should . . . I need to sort out the job thing, too. I’ve phoned the agency, but they only have a vacancy in Liverpool at the moment.’
‘Liverpool? But that’s a world away.’
‘I know. I’ve collected a few business cards on my travels — someone else might be recruiting. I can’t believe that bastard Todd suspended me and then acted as if he was offering to save me.’
‘Steer clear of him, Scarlett. He’s a nasty piece of work.’
‘That’s why I need another job, he’s not the sort to give up. If he can’t have me he will make sure I’m completely shafted.’
Louisa nodded. ‘I’m afraid he does sound capable of that.’
Elsa finally seemed to notice her aunty was upset and brought a pink teddy and a teaspoon over. She sat the teddy on the table next to Scarlett’s wine glass. ‘This is Sparkle, and it’s time for her tea,’ she said seriously. ‘To feed her, you crumple up a biscuit, like this.’ She broke off a small piece from a digestive into her hand. ‘And then you put the crumbs on a spoon to feed her.’ Glancing over at her mum, she whispered to Scarlett, ‘If she doesn’t eat it, just brush it to the floor.’ Elsa nodded reassuringly and pushed the spoon at Scarlett. ‘It will make you happy again, Sparkle Bear, too, ’cos she likes biscuits.’
‘Thank you, Elsa.’ She drew her niece into her arms and hugged her tightly, wanting the comfort of a warm body. She rested her cheek on her hair, until Elsa squirmed out of her reach to pull a fresh biscuit out of the packet. ‘I’ll just get you started,’ she said, taking a large bite of another biscuit and passing the rest to Scarlett.
Scarlett smiled as she took the half-eaten biscuit and began crumbling. Louisa patted her sister’s arm and left her to it. ‘Very therapeutic.’
Two minutes later, Louisa came back into the kitchen carrying her open laptop. ‘Good old Google.’ She set the laptop on the kitchen table. ‘Okay, Dylan is shortly to go on tour.’ Sheexaggerated thelast two lines and widenedher eyes.
‘On tour?’
‘Well, I use the words loosely. He’s in Highgate next month, in Camden after that, and ooh, quite the gadabout . . . in Birmingham just before Christmas as the support act for the Bitley Boys. Ooh, I’ve heard of them.’ She stabbed at the screen. ‘Look, he has a website and everything.’
Scarlett glanced over at the screen, and her heart turned over as Dylan’s face smiled back at her. She wanted to be pleased for him, she really did, but it hurt so much to see him reaching his goal without her. She pressed her lips together in an effort not to show her emotions. ‘Harrison didn’t waste much time, did he? Wants to earn more money for a fleet of Lamborghinis, maybe? One isn’t enough for a man like Harrison.’ She turned away from the computer screen in the hope that the image of Dylan wouldn’t become embedded in her mind forever.
‘Let’s go and see him, Scarlett. I’ll book it, yeah? We can get dressed up and make a night of it. Elsa can go to her dad’s.’
Scarlett was doubtful and momentarily too afraid to speak in case she blubbed again, but she thought about it for a minute. ‘Won’t I just be setting myself up for more heartache?’ she asked finally.
‘It will give you a chance to actually speak to him, though,’ Louisa said. ‘I don’t imagine he’ll be surrounded by security as he’s hardly a household name, yet, and I don’t mean that in a disparaging way,’ she added,
‘No, I know that,’ she agreed.
‘I think it’s a good idea. You can get it out of your system for good, one way or the other.’ Louisa smiled. ‘Shall we try for one of the Camden dates?’
Louisa nodded again, more positively. Once again she had a reason for her heart to keep on pumping blood around her body. She would go and see Dylan and try to make everything right. Even if he’d moved on she would feel better just to make her peace with him. Yes, it was what she needed to do.
Louisa pushed the cork firmly down into the second bottle of wine they’d started. ‘No more of this, eh? You’d better get a good night’s sleep. You look like crap.’
‘Thanks very much.’ But Scarlett smiled for the first time in ages and a tiny seed of hope started to grow.