Chapter 36
Chapter Thirty-Six
Freya
Apparently, kissing a man only works as a distraction when one is actively doing it.
After spending more time than we should have in the custodial supply room, during which my attention was thoroughly and sufficiently diverted, Elliot hastily put my hair in a French braid and promised to send for Runa to truly fix it before the press conference.
He led me back to where my friends are waiting to walk with me into the conference room, but now that I am here and staring at the closed door separating me from some of the people I love most, I am worried I may never find the courage to step inside and then to the room beyond.
The moment I join my friends is the moment I can no longer hide from reality, and all of my fears have come rushing back a hundredfold.
“Talk to me, Rapunzel.” Elliot slips his hand into mine, and though I feel his gaze on me, I cannot bear to look at him.
He has been so good for me the last couple of days, and I can no longer envision a world in which he is not right beside me. But the future—our future—is so uncertain. Regardless of the election’s outcome, being with him is going to be difficult. Not impossible, but it feels that way.
If Grimstad wins and takes the throne, my entire life will change. I will not need a bodyguard, and Elliot will need a new occupation. He is not the sort of person who can stand still, and neither am I, but finding somewhere we can both thrive would be a daunting task.
If I become queen, everything about our relationship becomes more complicated than ever. We can endure whatever comes, but it is difficult to think I am worth all the trouble.
I do not deserve the man beside me, but I have never been more grateful to have someone’s love and support.
Turning to face Elliot, I brush my fingertips along his jaw like I have done so many times now. “I love you.” The words taste sweet on my tongue and remind me of the taste of him.
His lips twitch in a momentary smile, but more than anything he looks relieved.
At peace. Happy. “I love you,” he repeats back to me, and then his smile grows, like he is recovering from the shock of my admission.
I’ve implied the sentiment but haven’t said those specific words before now.
Tilting his head toward the door in front of us, he looks at me in a way that seems to say, Ready for this?
Can anyone be ready for a whole country to choose their fate?
Taking a deep breath and exhaling slowly, I nod once and reluctantly release Elliot’s hand. I will tell my friends about him when all of this is over. When I know which direction our lives together are going to go.
I step through the door when Elliot opens it for me, and Derek is the first one I see.
He takes one look at me and opens his arms, and I fall into his embrace like I am starved for affection.
We have not had many chances to talk, but I am glad he is here.
It is hard to feel like anything can go wrong when Derek Riley is around.
When any of my friends are around, really. I smile at the rest of my friends, ready to hug them all in turn and thank them for coming across the world to support me. But Cole is not here, and the group feels incomplete.
“Cole and Carissa got back to the castle later than planned, but they’ll be here any minute,” Derek says to me as he lets go and steps back to stand next to Elliot. He must have seen my worry, and I’m grateful he understood without me asking. “How are you feeling, Peach?”
That is when I fall apart.
As if the question knocked loose the last solid piece of the dam holding my emotions in check, it all comes flooding out in a rush of panic and hysteria.
I am barely aware of anything around me as my body starts moving of its own accord, trying to escape the fear and anxiety by pacing the room.
Somewhere through the chaos, Bonnie tells me everything will be okay and Liam yawns through some sort of reassurance that I neither understand nor believe.
Derek is telling me to relax and breathe but I am about to combust or unravel or turn to stone. All of them at once.
“Peach!” Cole’s voice breaks through the chaos, his soothing tone muting some of the wild thoughts running through my head. But only some. “You need to calm down.”
“Already tried that,” Derek says.
I fear no one will be able to help me.
“I’m not going anywhere near that.” The amused remark a moment later comes from Elliot, and I turn to him in consternation.
He is likely doing what he can to interrupt my panic by shocking me out of it, but I do not appreciate his tone. “You are on thin ice, Mr. Reid,” I snap at him.
But he only smiles and lifts a glass of champagne that feels like a premature celebration. Who even poured it? He probably did it for himself. Presumptive American. “Good thing I know how to float,” he says, looking far too kissable as he smirks at me.
I groan. I do not need kisses, as much as I would enjoy them.
I need something to get my mind off the fact that there is only a small corridor between me and Markham and a whole slew of reporters who are waiting to see which one of us will be giving a speech.
I did not even prepare a speech. My gut told me that, were I to win, it would be because of my authenticity, and my speech should reflect that, but now I am realizing how utterly foolish that was as my friends break into soft conversation around me, likely talking about how I have lost my mind.
I need someone to give me something else to think about, and it seems Elliot is not willing to take that responsibility until his role in my life is no longer a secret.
Bonnie and Kasey tried earlier, but they are too sweet and kept asking me how I was handling it all.
Liam, as much as I love him, does not handle time zone changes well and looks as if he is halfway asleep again, and Hank is more of a listener than a talker.
The only people who haven’t given it a try are—
“Coleman!” I shout, turning to him. Cole and Carissa both jump in surprise.
“I need a distraction.” Fixing my gaze on Cole, I silently beg him to understand how desperately I need him right now.
His old football team has had some drama lately; maybe that will be distracting enough.
“Tell me about the Badgers. Someone won’t let me on the internet”—I glare at Elliot, who simply chuckles and sips his champagne—“but I have heard that that sports reporter released a story about your corrupted team.”
This should be good news, as the corruption is the reason Cole left football for rugby, but Cole does not look happy. He looks confused. “Did you just say ‘won’t’?” he asks, and some of my panic is instantly replaced with irritation. “Like, an actual contraction?”
This is not the time to discuss my shifting speech patterns. “Distraction!” Oh, but I do not want to yell at him when he is like a brother to me, so I force a breath and remind myself that I am a princess and should act like one. “Please.”
I struggle to concentrate as he tells me about how there is a whole investigation starting up in the NFL revolving around illegal betting rings and game manipulation because Cole finally spoke out about why he left the sport, but he looks so relieved.
And happy. I think a lot of his recent peace has come from the woman beside him, and I finally understand how Carissa changed him so much.
I would not have made it this far without Elliot.
My eyes drift his way, and he offers a small but warm smile that settles deep in my soul and soothes some of the fear inside me.
He was right when he said my friends will support me no matter what happens in the next hour, because I would support my friends no matter what happened to them.
Tabloids, libel, corruption, or elections cannot harm the bonds we have forged together. Nothing can separate us.
“Your Highness,” Elliot says after glancing down at his phone. He meets my gaze again, his expression tight. “It’s almost time.”
I might be sick. “Do I have to?”
“No,” Derek replies, “but I doubt the people will be very happy if you’re not on camera when you find out you won the election.”
“Camera!” The word squeaks out of me as awareness hits me hard.
Elliot never got a chance to send for Runa, and in my panic I destroyed the haphazard braid holding my hair back.
It is a wild mess around my shoulders now, and I am about to beg Elliot to fix it when Bonnie and Carissa hurry to my side and start wrangling my waves.
I keep my eyes on Elliot as they work, wishing he were the one running his fingers through my hair but grateful that my friends are here to help. I love you, I mouth to him.
You are perfection, he mouths back. I do not have his lip reading skills, but he makes it easy to understand his words because they are written all over his face.
I lift an eyebrow. That was never in question.
I can’t wait to see how it feels to kiss a queen.
Whether that is actually what he said, my face heats so hot that I worry everyone will be able to read my thoughts. This man… I can’t wait to see how it feels to kiss a king, I mouth back.
Elliot grins, but beside him, Derek groans and palms his face.
Apparently he can read lips too. What, is this a more common skill than I realized?
“It is not my fault you cannot mind your own business,” I tell Derek in Candoran.
He rolls his eyes, which prompts Elliot to say, “You are the one who pushed us together,” in Candoran as well, and the shapes of the sounds are more beautiful on his lips than they should be.
I am impressed by how much he has picked up in the couple of months he has been here but not surprised.
Elliot is a man of many talents, particularly when it comes to his tongue.
Oh, I need to keep my thoughts away from his tongue unless I wish to melt into the floor.
Glancing at the rest of our friends, who all do their best not to look interested in whatever the three of us are saying, Derek seems to think through his words carefully. As always, his Candoran is almost flawless as he says, “I knew you would be good for each other, but I never expected this.”
Neither did I, Derek.
Bonnie and Carissa finish tucking a final braid around the bun at the back of my head, looking rather pleased with themselves for finally finding a way to help me. I hug them both, and then I have no more excuses to delay my entrance into the conference room.
“You can do this,” I tell myself, wishing I sounded more confident; right now, I am a terrible motivator. “You…” The panic is returning, leaving me dizzy. “You can…”
Suddenly Elliot is at my side, a fiery look in his eyes.
He is the only thing I can see. “If you don’t go out there,” he says slowly, “I will make you go out there. I’m not letting you miss out on your future just because you’re scared.
” His eyes are saying so much more, but he does not give me a chance to try to interpret because he bends down and moves in, as if he is about to throw me over his shoulder like he did in Invem.
I applaud myself for only flinching a little and recognizing that he would not do something so cruel.
Losing the election would be mortifying; being carried into the room over my bodyguard’s shoulder would be a thousand times worse.
Ignoring his tiny smirk, I stand as regal as I can.
“That will not be necessary at the moment, Mr. Reid.” But he may need to carry me out of the conference room when all this is over. I might not survive the evening.
That look is still in Elliot’s eyes, and I know now what he is trying to tell me. No matter what, I go where you go.
My shoulders relax.
Everything will be okay.