Awkward Date With A Wicked Orc (Sweet Monster Treats)

3. Lila

Chapter 3

Lila

I hide in the women’s bathroom at the brewery and call my sister.

“Sadie,” I cry into the speaker phone. “I bumped into a waitress and two pints of ale fell all over the front of my dress. I’m a complete mess.”

She lets out a snort of derision. “Does this mean you’re leaving? Are you wimping out and running out on this date?”

I lean over the sink, turn on the water and use a damp paper towel to try and sop up some of the beer on my white dress. “Shouldn’t I? My dress is damp and I think everyone can see through the front. I’ve done so much wrong, Urdan probably wants me to leave. I parked in front of the wrong bar and he had to come and rescue me from a group of bully bikers. Then I tripped on the curb and fell on my hands and knees in the grass with my skirt up and my bare ass in the air. He carried me across the street like roadkill. And now I’m a smelly mess. He must think I’m a bungling fool.”

“Bully bikers? Who are you even talking about?”

“I’ll tell you the story later. The point is I look like hell because I’m so nervous in front of him that I can’t even move right. I’ve got two different grass stains on the hem of my white dress and ale all down the front.”

“I told you not to wear white. I also told you those designer sandals would break your ankles.”

I look down at my feet and examine the delicate heels. “Yeah. Yeah. But they look so good.”

“Whatever. Look, I’ve got important news. Urdan really likes you.”

“He does? Despite everything I’ve done? How do you know this?”

“He just texted Bowen, thanking him for setting up this date. He claims it’s going well. What color are your bra and panties?”

“Nude. He thinks it’s going well?”

“Yes. And you’re fine, no one will see much of anything through that dress, and I bet it’s already drying.”

I pluck at the front, trying to give it more air. “True, but I smell like beer.”

“You’re at a brewery. This will only make you more attractive.”

I laugh out loud. “Good point.”

“Get out there, girl, and kill it.”

“Okay, okay. Thanks, Sadie. See ya later.” I end the call, take a deep breath and wash my hands. Apply another layer of lipstick. Then I open the door to the restroom and stride back out. It’s weird, but I swear all eyes are on me as I walk. I do my best not to imagine these orcs seeing right through my dress.

As I make my way back to our table, I see the waitress leaning in close and chatting with Urdan before she moves on to help another group. The broken glass and spilled ale are all cleaned, and fresh pints are on the table. I can’t help but frown as I approach. The waitress is very attractive and I have a feeling she likes my date a little too much.

Urdan stands and hands me a black leather jacket. “I went to my car while you were in the bathroom and got this for you. I thought you might want to use this to cover up your wet dress.”

Warmth blossoms in my chest at this unexpected kindness. I reach out and accept the jacket. “Oh, thank you. That is exactly what I need right now.” I gratefully slide it on and it smells so good. Like leather, soil and sunshine. The jacket is very large and covers all the parts I need covered. Plus, it’s a damn cool leather jacket. This orc has style.

Soon we are both seated again, sipping at our ale.

Urdan leans back in his chair, that hard green, muscular chest still visible between the gap of his unbuttoned black shirt. I’m doing my best to not stare at the enticing spot where his bare stomach meets his silver belt buckle. “Are you okay? Do you still want to stay?” he questions.

“I’m fine,” I answer with all honesty. “Yes, lots of crazy things have happened to me in the last hour, but I’d love to stay and still have dinner, if that’s alright with you.”

He grins, exposing more white tusk. “It’s exactly what I was hoping you’d say.”

The waitress returns, and I use the menu to order a creamy beef and mushroom soup that looks amazing. Urdan orders steak and potato. Then she’s gone and I’m wondering if I can trust this orc to ignore the flirting of other women and remain concentrated on the one he’s with; he seems to be focused on me right now but…

“Lila?”

I blink out of my reverie. Shoot, I must be fretting over what I can objectively tell is nothing. “I’m sorry. It’s just…well, maybe I should go ahead and tell you this up front. My ex cheated on me, many, many times. And I have to admit there are still layers of trauma I’m still working through. It makes me more sensitive than someone else to the idea of being with someone who won’t be focused on our relationship.”

“Did something happen tonight to make you concerned?”

I shake my head. “It was nothing. I know it’s nothing. It’s just being out like this brings up old thoughts and makes me think it’s a good time to tell you up front that since I have that in my past, it’s super important to me that I’m with someone I can trust. In my next relationship I’m looking for a man who is as serious about monogamy as I am. If I can’t have trust and monogamy, then I’d rather be alone.”

He nods. “Understood.”

“Does that bother you?”

He shrugs and gulps down more ale. “It makes sense. You had a male who was not a committed mate. And now you want a committed mate.”

“Yes.”

“This is good news because orcs cannot physically cheat.”

“I’ve heard this.”

He grins over his tankard. “It’s true.”

I chuckle, feeling much more relaxed.

“And since orcs need monogamy, I’m pleased to hear that you would be a human who wants that too.”

I give him a big smile. “You will certainly never hear me asking for an open relationship. That’s not gonna occur.”

He chuckles.

I lean back in my seat and cross one leg over the other. “I would love to learn more about you, Urdan. Tell me, what did you do at the compound? I mean, what was your job?”

“I was head of security.”

“Oh, that’s why you are now a deputy sheriff. That makes sense.”

“And what do you do in the human world, Lila?”

“You don’t know?”

“No.”

“I work at the bakery with Sadie, Bowen’s wife. We are co-owners of One Big Bite.”

“Oh, that’s good. You make food for other humans?”

I take another deep gulp of the ale, finishing my first pint. It really is terrific. It’s dark but doesn’t taste bitter. I can find notes of fruitiness that are pleasant. And I’m already a little tipsy, which is loosening my tongue. “I make desserts. Treats,” I tell him. “And we often decorate fancy custom cakes for different occasions. Sadie is my sister and Bowen is my brother-in-law.”

“You said that earlier. I didn’t know this until tonight.”

I shift in my seat, realizing the area between my thighs is hot and ready for business. This is the horniest I’ve felt my entire life. Not even my cheating ex, who I’d previously thought I’d married because he was the hottest man I’d ever encountered, did this for me. My nipples are peaked under my bra and begging to be sucked and pinched, possibly at the same time.

“Tell me more about yourself, Lila.”

“Well…I majored in sociology in college.”

“What is that?”

“A degree that I enjoyed but you can’t do much with all by itself. I was going to move on and go to law school, but…”

“But?”

“I supported my husband while he was in law school and then I was going to go next, but...it didn’t happen.”

“Do you regret not becoming a lawyer?”

“Actually, I don’t. And now I co-own that local bakery with my sister and we’re doing really well. I’ve discovered I like owning my own business. It’s funny how in life you can end up taking a path you never thought you’d take.”

“I agree.” Then he asks another question. “Are you certain you want to start a relationship with an orc deputy sheriff?”

“Well, like I said before, I went through a bad divorce. But that was a few years ago. I really didn’t mind being single, but I do think I’m ready to start dating again.”

“This is your first date since the divorce?”

“Yes,” I answer, continuing to love the sound of his deep voice. “I want you to know, getting divorced wasn’t an easy decision for me. I took my vows very seriously. My ex cheated on me and begged me to take him back. We’d gone to therapy, and I'd really thought we had worked past the cheating. I'd even gotten to a place where I felt I could trust him again. Then the pandemic happens and I find out through clues that he’s having an affair with his secretary. I didn't even realize he had a new secretary. I was devastated. This time, he didn't even bother to hide it. Everybody had to be isolated with their family units, and I got scared for a second, thinking he was going to insist on trying to make it work with me, which would have been a hell no. Instead, he isolated with her during the pandemic, which worked out fine. In the end, I got divorced and he remarried. Don’t cry for me, I did well financially. But the good news is, all of that is starting to feel like a long time ago. I think it helps that he remarried so fast, because it caused me to let go quicker. And…” I take another gulp of ale. “And I’m really happy we’re on this date.”

“I am too. Bowen and Sadie worked together to set us up on this date?”

“Yes, my sister talked me into this, and Bowen was your contact. They must’ve tag-teamed this. I had to say yes because I basically did the same for her. I'm the one who got her together with Bowen. I could tell that she had something for him, and she wasn't doing anything about it, and neither was he. And then there was a spring fundraiser for the county food bank where she would be fake arrested by the sheriff. I thought that would be perfect, because he would end up arresting her. I was right, and in the end, he moved quick, and they're married and even have a baby now.”

I pause in my story because the food arrives. It looks delicious and smells terrific. “Thank you,” I say with all seriousness to the waitress. “And I’m sorry again for running into you like that earlier and spilling all that ale on the floor. Thank you for cleaning it up after I ran crying to the bathroom.”

“It’s alright.” She laughs, then leans in and whispers. “I remember what it was like when I first met my husband too. It does a job on your hormones. Sends you all out of whack. You’ll get your equilibrium back soon enough.”

“But he’s not…”

She pats my shoulder and she’s gone, helping another table.

My face heats up as I meet Urdan’s molten gaze. I swear he heard everything. He looks comfortable and in charge of his surroundings. He even looks good, eating huge bites of steak. I like the shine of his black horns and my mind flashes to the idea of holding onto those horns as he licks me to orgasm. Oh jeez. I need to concentrate on my meal and not on the sexy, hot-as-sin orc across the table. I look down and spoon a bite of tender beef. “This soup is amazing.”

“Orc food is always fresh food. We do freeze some food and dry others, but mainly we like whole food.”

“You never eat human food?”

“Oh, I also like human food. I particularly enjoy pizza. And chocolate.”

We end up finishing our meals and even enjoy a small chocolate desert that we share. Time flies because we talk so much. He tells me stories of what it was like, growing up on the commune, and I tell him a lot about the small lake town he’s just moved to and is still learning about. We laugh a lot and share jokes and I’m having a terrific time.

The check arrives and Urdan insists on paying for everything. “Are you ready?” he questions.

“Yes,” I answer, a bit sad that our time is ending. If my kids weren’t returning to my house soon, I’d probably ask him over to my place.

We get to the front courtyard again and it’s pitch-black outside.

“Do you feel sober enough to drive?” he questions.

“Yes. I only had the one tankard of ale. I stopped after that on purpose because I knew I’d eventually have to drive. Then I switched to water. I’m ready.”

“Good.” Urdan opens the metal gate. “I’m walking you to your car.”

“No, you don't have to, you could just watch me from here...”

A growl rumbles in his chest. “I'm walking you to your car.”

I look across the street and see how dark it is and how the whole area is teeming with people. It looks like they're having some sort of biker meetup. It's very busy. My car, even though it was parked on the side and was by itself originally, is now in the thick of things. “Okay, I have to admit I would appreciate that,” I tell him.

Urdan takes my hand in his, and we look both ways before striding across the street. I love the feel of my hand in his and the warmth of his big body at my side. I literally feel a sense of pride, walking with him, letting people see that I’m holding his hand and wearing his jacket. And I enjoy our budding friendship, as well as my over-the-top attraction that hasn’t stopped, and only increased.

He looks good as he walks, his stride is long and the swing of his muscular arms is powerful. I feel safe next to this orc.

I can't help but wonder if this might be the start of something serious. But I thought I had something before. I thought my boyfriend from high school was serious and that went nowhere. He cheated on me too. I thought my husband was, of course, serious and he lied and cheated on me. How good is my judgment? It's not only me I have to think of anymore, it's my kids. Justin and Lacy need a good dad in their lives. They need a man who will love them too.

Being with an orc means I’ll get pregnant instantly with an orc son. That’s just how it is when you marry an orc. There are no orc females and they impregnate human women with orc sons. That’s how they continue their species. Saying yes to this date meant I was open-minded with the idea of becoming a mother again and having orc children. But I would say the most important thing is, how would he treat my two human kids? Would he favor his orc son over mine, the same way Robert is doing with his new family? Would my kids be left as second-class citizens again, with no father? I'd rather be alone than put my kids through that again.

We reach the parking lot for the biker bar and the mood seems jovial. I was concerned that, considering the first bikers that we’d met—Jude and his group—all the bikers maybe felt animosity towards orcs. But Urdan is immediately noticed and greeted. He lifts his chin, holds up his hand a few times. One of the bikers even comes up and gives Urdan a quick man hug and they chat for a moment, and then we keep walking. Next thing you know, we're at the van.

I smile up at him. “Well, that was a completely different reception than our first encounter with this place.”

“Yes, the biker bar and the orc brewery have a good rapport. They visit us. We visit them. The group you first met is highly unusual.”

“Well, good. That makes me believe in the kindness of strangers a little bit more.”

“Yes,” he says. “I’d viewed humans a certain way, mainly from all the stories I had heard, not because I had lived amongst them enough, and now that I am out here...” He looks at me. “I can see that it is much different than I’d thought. I'm happy you're here. And I am hoping that we can meet again.”

“I would like that,” I tell him with all honesty. “I’d love to go out on another date.”

We exchange cell numbers, and I get in my car and try to turn it on. This is when I discover that my battery is dead.