Backcheck Heart: An L.A. Crush Hockey Novella (Nashvellas & Novels)

Chapter 8

“I had a great time, Zlatí?ko,” Ralphie says as we stand outside my apartment after another wonderful date. He took me to a screening of one of my favorite movies in the park tonight. That would have been sweet enough, but he also brought an honest-to-God picnic for us to eat while enjoying the show. His charcuterie skills could use some work, but the thought behind it was unmatched.

I am more than ready to show him how much I appreciate his effort, but he is once again dropping me off at my door and refusing my offer to come in.

“I have an early workout tomorrow. Maybe we can get together on Sunday? I know you have a busy week flying out tomorrow and working at the club Saturday.”

Ugh. He’s even understanding about my schedule. He’s going to have to stop being this nice and compassionate if he isn’t going to let me jump his bones.

“That works,” I answer quietly, not meeting his gaze.

His knuckle tips my chin back until we’re peering into each other’s eyes. I expect to see apathy, but a zing of electricity and lust zaps through my body when I spot heat. Maybe I was reading this wrong and he does want more than a quick peck tonight.

The finger on my chin moves upward to trace my cheek before his hand slips behind my head, and he pulls me toward him. Ralphie opens his mouth as if to say something but shuts it before any words come out. Instead, he presses his lips to mine softly, too softly for the inferno raging inside me.

Deciding to take what I want, I move into him until my chest is pressed against his and lick the seam of his lips. After a moment of hesitation, he opens for me and our soft kiss turns passionate. His contentment to let me lead lasts about two seconds before he takes back control, not that I mind.

The hand in my hair tightens as he devours my mouth. His other hand lands on my hip, fingers teasing the top of my ass cheek. A tidal wave of longing surges through me, and I moan into his mouth. The action shakes him from the moment, and he pulls back, chest heaving.

“Fuck, you’re delectable, Morgan.”

“I taste better the further down you go,” I tease. I wouldn’t usually say something that forward, but the way his nostrils flare erases any shyness.

“I have no doubt,” he mutters, almost to himself. “I can’t wait to find out for myself.”

I clench my thighs at the prospect, but when I turn to unlock my door, he stops me. “I’ll see you Sunday.”

I study his face, searching to understand the change in mood, but I don’t find anything. I can see the hunger in his eyes and the bulge in his shorts. For whatever reason, he isn’t letting himself have me yet. Maybe he isn’t as ready to commit as I thought. He seems the type of guy who wouldn’t want me to get too attached before we lay down ground rules. I’ve heard that speech a million times. I know how it goes.

I want to tell him that, but something stops me. I think hearing Ralphie say he doesn’t want anything serious would crush me in a way I’m not prepared for. Instead of replying out loud, I nod and accept his peck on my forehead.

Flopping down on my bed, I replay the night in my head. It was a perfect date. We ate. We talked about our weekends. We laughed. Well, I laughed. He’s more of a chuckle on the inside guy, but I heard a few chuffs during the movie.

Now that I think about it, I did dominate the conversation and knocked over my wine after a giggling fit. In my defense, you can’t not laugh at Melissa McCarthy seducing an Air Marshal. A few people did turn to stare at us, though.

Rubbing my hands down my face, I realize I was a bit full-on tonight. I also shouldn’t have worn wedges and a silk skirt to the park. It wasn’t the most practical for sitting on a blanket and side-eye from the other attendees tells me I looked out of place.

Ralphie is a low-profile guy. He doesn’t enjoy attention. I bet he was uncomfortable by the stares I drew. He asked me out for another date and kissed me goodnight, though. That has to count for something.

Letting out a frustrated huff, I wash off my makeup and prepare for bed. A good night’s sleep will hopefully make my head more clear.

I wakeup the next morning with no more clarity than the night before, and all the giddiness from the kiss gone. As much as I want to lay in bed and overanalyze our interactions, I need coffee.

As my cup brews, I scroll through social media and check out the stories I posted last night. I made sure not to post anything of Ralphie, but I may have soft-launched him a tiny bit with his legs in the frame. He doesn’t have any tattoos or identifying features, so it isn’t as if anyone but me will know or notice.

Scratch that. One person will notice. And she’s calling me right now.

“Hi, Tini Rini,” I greet my brother’s girlfriend. “How is my future sister-in-law?”

“You can’t call me that. We are not engaged. I still have two years of college left.”

“Semantics, my dear Carina. Rob is crazy about you. It will happen.”

“We’ll see. Stop distracting me. I didn’t call to chat about myself. I called to talk about the mystery man in last night’s story.”

“What mystery man?”

“You know exactly who I am talking about. Spill!”

“There is nothing to spill. I went out on a date with a man, and his legs happened to be in the frame of my picture.”

“Liar. We both know nothing is in the frame that you don’t want. How long have y’all been seeing each other? What’s his name? When will he get a hard launch? Does Robby know?”

I spend the next few minutes detailing my history with Ralphie and discussing the dates we’ve been on. Aside from the crafts fair and movie in the park, he also took me to lunch before I left for a flight this last week at a cute cafe near the Marina.

“We’re keeping it casual,” I finish.

“Casual? Nothing about that story sounds casual for you or him.”

“It’s not as if we’re exclusive or anything. We haven’t even had sex. Everyone knows you can’t be serious or exclusive before you’ve sealed the deal.”

“Sealed the deal?” She makes a gagging sound.

“I don’t think you have room to be grossed out, considering I caught you and my brother getting busy under the pier at his graduation party.”

“We were not getting busy!” she gasps. “It was a quick make-out with some light petting.”

“Carina! That is worse than ‘seal the deal.’ And my brother is involved. Can we not?”

She laughs. “Sorry. My point is that not everyone has the same opinion on what requirements must be met to be considered exclusive. Robby and I were exclusive before we had sex.”

“Oh, my sweet angel baby,” I coo. “The men in my world do. Trust me. I learned this lesson the hard way on more than one occasion. If he hasn’t said it specifically, he’s dating other women. And no man is locking it down without sampling the goods.”

It took three different men asking me why I thought we were exclusive to get that point, but I keep that to myself. Rob is, thankfully, a much more noble man than the men I date. It helps that he and Carina are college sweethearts, and she was a virgin when they got together. The rules are different. I don’t remind her of any of those points, though.

“If that’s the case, are you seeing anyone else then?” she inquires, knowing that isn’t how I roll. I always get too attached too soon and can never play the game. That’s why I always end up crying into a tub of Ben and Jerry’s that I’ve had longer than the man who broke my heart.

“Not really. I’ve talked to a few guys on dating apps, but nothing has made it into the real world.”

“Let me know if that changes,” she requests. “Your brother is calling me before his practice. I have to go. Text me when you have updates!”

“You got it, sis. Tell my loser brother to text me back.”

“Will do!”

My mood lifts after talking to Carina, but I am still unsettled by everything. If I could choose Ralphie, I would. But I don’t want to put all my eggs in one basket. I’ve made that mistake too many times. The idea of seeing anyone else makes my stomach churn, but I vow to think it over.

My plan tobranch out in my dating life would be a lot easier if Ralphie weren’t the most confusing person in the world. Despite being busy with his preseason conditioning and my being out of pocket on five flights—including a deadhead to Little Rock—he’s made time to connect.

I have been extra cautious not to come on too strong since I don’t know where we stand. The same cannot be said for him. Every morning, I wake up to a text from him, and we exchange several more throughout the day, always initiated by him. He even double-texts with random thoughts or additional information when I take too long to respond. It’s as if he doesn’t care about the texting rules at all.

When I landed in Nashville after flight number three, he had food delivered from a restaurant he discovered during his playoff series there last year. I tried to tell him I had a per diem when I was on assignment, but that was the one text he ignored.

I can’t tell if he’s attempting to woo me because he thinks he has to—he doesn’t—or if he’s building me up because he has a weird fetish, and that is why he’s waiting. He’s lulling me into a false sense of security until I feel too guilty to turn him down. Maybe he has a latex kink or is building a harem.

Sweet as they are, his gestures have me more confused. Cherri offered to set me up with a friend of her brother’s when I told her Ralphie and I hadn’t defined our relationship. Apparently, he’s been interested in me for a while and doesn’t want to miss his shot now that I am ‘unattached’ again.

On one hand, it feels as if I would be cheating on Ralphie. But on the other, for all I know, I am one of the many women he’s keeping on the line until he’s ready to reveal his hockey harem plan. I don’t really think he’s planning a harem, but who can tell? His gruff exterior makes him impossible to read.

I desperately want to ask him what we are or where this is going, but then I would be the needy girl other guys have accused me of being. Hell, practically-peed-a-circle-around-me, Chet didn’t want to put a label on things until Ralphie showed up.

I return to LA tomorrow and work a shift at Clamatis with Cherri. She’s been talking to Ralphie’s teammate. Hopefully, she will have some insider information on Ralphie’s deal. If not, maybe I’ll let her set me up. As much as I like Ralphie, I’m eager to be with someone ready to be with me, and I don’t know if he is.