Bayou Bishops Box Set: Books 1-12

CHAPTER 5

Cat was dangling by a burning thread, waiting for his first question. Her body was doing shameful things she’d never imagined capable. And she was being brassy with him, but she had no choice. Her mind interpreted him as some kind of threat in a corner which always gave her a crazy fearlessness. And thank the lord, because becoming an embarrassing virgin puddle on the floor was not what she wanted to be around him.

“Would you like another orgasm before we begin?”

Her mouth hung open and she was stuck in his gaze, breathless.

“Seems you need more practice with those.”

This snapped her out of her stupidity. “Did I…do it wrong?”

A laugh escaped him, and he eyed her, grinning. “Not at all. But you’ve only had one.”

Was there a number you were supposed to have before you were…ready for the next whatever? “How many uh…is required?”

Great she was being stupid judging by his chuckles and lowered head.

“Well, I told you I don’t know anything,” she accused, fighting her shame.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to laugh at you. I just find your…inexperience a lot of fun.”

Not helpful. She crossed her arms over her chest, pressing her lips together while doing that brave eyeballing thing at him. “Since you’re not gonna ask me a question, maybe you can answer some of mine.”

He stared at her, his eyes moving to her chest then lower, sending her heart between her legs.

“What about your orgasm?”

His hot eyes meandered their way back to hers, making her dizzy. “What about it?”

“Well…you’ve been celibate,” she pointed out. “For how long?”

“Over fifteen years.”

She gestured at him, even looked at his delicious tanned, silky skin all the way to the waistband of his black slacks. “I mean…does it still work, even?” Heat erupted in her cheeks at his big, sexy laugh. “You know what, that’s rude,” she muttered.

“God, I’m sorry,” he swore, suddenly standing before her chair, forcing her to look up at him.

Her gaze fell to his hands, unbuttoning his pants. “What…are you doing?”

“Showing you.”

“Showing me…what?” she gasped, eyes locked on his tight black underwear and the mountain beneath.

He lowered the front of his underwear and his massive cock seemed to bounce out, pointing right at her. Oh. God.

“Does it look like it works to you?”

She couldn’t move an inch as she stared, the shiny drop on the tip a focal point of terror and fascination.

“Would you like to touch it?”

Her breaths escaped in erratic bursts.

“It is yours,” he reasoned, his words licking between her legs.

“I…”

He held his hand out next to his penis and without thinking, she put hers in it, eyes mesmerized with the thick vein running along the length. And the size, it was…long and so…huge. He pulled her hand to his penis, and she panicked, pulling in reverse.

He covered it with his underwear again and sat before she had any time to process anything. Namely how childish she’d acted. Pulling her hand back like he was forcing her to molest him. “I…”

“You’re not ready for that yet.”

“I…I am,” she argued in a frail whisper, earning his angled head and studious eyes on her.

“You just need more practice.” His gaze took a hot stroll over her while he sat with his sexy legs open. “You wore the red panties?”

She was back to erratic breathing with that one. She managed a nod.

“Let me see.”

Oh no.

His eyes moved up to her face and she closed hers, unable to see him.

“Can I…ask you something? First?”

“Of course you can.”

His tone was gentle and easy while a hurricane of fear screamed in her head. “What…did you think of…” Oh God, of what? Her hair down there? She wasn’t about to let those words come out of her mouth. But how to ask!? Maybe she should tell him what she got from Big G. “I…told you that I learned how to…get Big G to…tell me things.”

“And?”

The testing, accusing tone didn’t help at all.

“Well, I…asked him what…some men liked in women.” She wet her lips, unable to move her eyes from her lap. She was in the worst kind of corner she’d ever been in but there was no courage or backbone there to help her.

“And?”

Oh God, he was mad now.

Hurry and tell him before you ruin everything!

“What did he say?”

Shit, he was very mad.

“A lot of things but…one thing stood out. About…”

“Tell me.”

His hard tone brought it in a gasp. “Shaving!”

She kept her eyes clenched tight, waiting.

“Shaving…”

“The…privates!” The childish sound of her voice mortified her. Childish just like her bald vagina.

“You shaved,” he repeated, like he couldn’t believe his ears.

She covered her face with both hands. “Yes! I shaved! I shaved my privates! Oh God,” she croaked. “I should have asked before doing something so stupid.”

“Let me see.”

“No! God no! It’s…”

“It’s fucking what?” he asked, his curious astonishment adding a million degrees of shame.

“Hideous!”

The word barely squeaked past her tight throat as tears stung her eyes.

“What exactly did Big G tell you?” he asked, his tone again accusing.

She wiped the tears from her face. “That…some men liked a woman with no hair…down there.”

“And how did you figure I was one of those men?”

“I was…just wanting to do something you liked, and you refuse to tell me what that is!”

“Show me your pussy.”

The order stole her breath and set a trembling in her limbs.

“Remember what you agreed to? Whatever I wanted to see. When I wanted to see it. In whatever position I want to see it. Stand up and take off the dress. Leave the panties.”

“Please!” she gasped, looking at him.

He stared at her and suddenly stood, making her pulse boom in her ears. He leaned down, putting his mouth by her ear. “You want to compromise?”

Compromise? She nodded without even knowing what she was compromising.

“You’ll let me feel it,” he said in her ear. “Right now. Before I change my mind.”

She gasped and opened her knees at that threat. Anything to avoid his eyes on that mess.

His hand moved between her legs and found the shame behind the lace. He stroked his fingers, his breaths hot at her ear. “Relax,” he ordered. “Lay back for me.”

Her spine was like a creaky hinge as she obeyed him till her back was against the chair. She gripped the edges, her breaths getting sharp at feeling him at the top of her panties. Oh God, he was going in!

He stroked slowly over her naked mound, then lower, feeling and pressing. “Why did you do this?” he asked, his voice unsteady. “You wanted to get my cock so fucking hard? Make me fucking crazy for you? Is that it?”

She gasped as his huge finger worked its way inside her.

“I’m going to eat your naked pussy. That’s what you wanted? You want my tongue where my finger is? Fucking answer me.”

“Yes,” she gasped.

“And rightfucking here?” His thumb swirled over her clit as he touched everything deep inside her. “You want my tongue on this hard fucking clit?”

“Ethan,” she gasped.

“You want that?”

“Yes!”

“Show me how much you want it. Oh yeah,” he shuddered in her ear. “Open those fucking legs nice and wide for me.”

She pulled her knees open and back, moans and gasps non-stop.

“Show me how fucking bad you want it.”

“Ethan, oh!”

“You’re coming on my finger?” he growled right in her ear, bringing an explosion inside her.

“Oh! Oh! Oh!”

He grabbed the back of her hair and pulled, sending sparks of pain and fear flying as he filled her ear with the hottest groans and gasps, shoving his finger hard to the very bottom of her. She couldn’t open wide enough as wave after wave of pleasure had its endless way.

He pulled his hand out of her with his biggest growl yet and the absence of that fullness brought her cry even as she fought her way back from cloud nine.

She finally opened her eyes to an empty kitchen. She looked around, lowering her dress. Where did he go?

Her mind re-played all the angry things he said to her. She sagged in the chair, fighting to catch her breath while her head spun with confusion. When he wasn’t laughing at her, he was angry. She was so stupid to think she could do this. That she was suitable material. She was a childish embarrassment. His mean words returned to her, and she gasped at realizing. He talked to her like…she was…a putan. Because she was acting like one. Because she knew nothing and he refused to tell her what he liked!

****

Ethan paced in his office so fucking aroused he was ready to kill something. “Big G.”

“Yes?”

“What…” He grit his teeth, fighting for control. “Tell me what you told Cat about shaving.”

He listened to him repeat it, word for word.

“Did you not know she was playing you for answers?”

“I did not know this.”

“That’s exactly what she was doing. AL,” he called next.

“Yes?” he answered, innocently.

“Did you have anything to do with this?”

“Nope,” he said, sounding proud. “Did you like it?”

His cock jerked at the question. “She’s driving me crazy too quickly. Every scenario I imagine with her never happens. Something else does, something…like that.”

“Your levels indicate—”

“Don’t fucking tell me what my levels indicate, AL. I know what you’re doing.”

“As you wish.”

He continued pacing, the feel of her pussy on his fingers raping his mind. He now needed to see those plump naked lips wrapping his cock. Slowly. Inch by inch. He recalled her fear from a gentle hair pulling. What would she be when he forced her to take his cock because that’s where he was in his head.

“Perhaps she might benefit from accidental training in the Dungeon when you’re not around?” AL suggested.

Ethan grabbed his cock when an orgasm surged at those fucking words. He stood there, breathing in the flames.

“She can’t fucking know about that, not for a long time.”

“I can train her for you,” AL offered, burning him. “You know I’m very good at what I do. I had the best teacher. I can call it…classes.”

Fuck. Classes. They had classes. That was it. He’d forgotten he had it all worked out. Then she kept happening to all his careful plans.

“If she wants to please you,” Big G said.

“I can’t,” he grit. “I’ll lose my mind on her, I can already tell. She’s…so much more than I imagined.”

“Well…you might want to check on her.”

Ethan snapped his head to his monitors. Panic flooded him at seeing her at the boat. “Fuck.”

He tore out of the house, making it to the boat as she was trying to start it without the key.

“Cat.”

“I want to go home. Take me home.”

“Come back inside.”

“No!” she yelled, aiming her tear-streaked face at him. “I want…to go home!”

“There’s a hurricane.”

“Then I’ll go to my brothers!”

“I’ll take you tomorrow.”

She shook her head, wiping her tears. “I want to go now,” she insisted. “I’m done playing this…stupid guessing game with you while I’m the one dying in shame from guessing wrong.”

Fuck. Fuck. “Don’t go. Let’s talk.”

“About what? What I want?”

“No, about what I want.”

She crossed her arms, looking away from him. “Why don’t you just…find somebody who knows what the hell they’re doing?”

Those words stirred up vile memories and he hurried and put a lid on them. “I told you… I wouldn’t have you any other way. I like you just like you are.”

“Well, I don’t!”

“I said I would teach you.”

“Then teach me!” she yelled.

“I will not rush,” he said, louder than he meant. “Why are you pushing me?” He stared at her tears, wanting to kill that he’d caused them. “I picked you because we’re a lot alike. You said you didn’t need a man, you didn’t want one. And I believe that still, you can take care of yourself.”

She kept her face down, hugging herself. “You’re right,” she barely said. “I didn’t lie when I said all that, I just didn’t know.”

“What didn’t you know?”

“You,” she said, the ache in her voice killing him while she looked at him with those sparkling eyes. “Turns out I never needed a man till I met you. I mean…I knew it would be a challenge because look at you.”

Look at himhe wondered, confused? “What about me?”

She angled her head like he was playing stupid. “Ethan, you’re more beautiful than any woman I know and you’re a heck of a lot more beautiful than me. And I have done some pretty difficult things in my life,” she assured, “and I figured this would just be another challenge, nothing I couldn”t handle.”

God, what did her words mean to her? Asking seemed to only piss her off but he really needed to know if he was going to fix anything.

“I thought I could just…have... biology with you and figure out the rest later, but I was wrong, and I realize that’s on me. You never offered more than biology, I know that. And…you know what?” She looked at him and he held his breath, praying the next thing out of her mouth would clarify things. “I think I needed this, I feel a lot better getting all this off my chest.” She stuck her hand out like she wanted a shake. “Can we start over and pretend like I didn’t have a meltdown over this? As usual, I’ve embarrassed myself with all this…inexperience. Won’t happen again.”

Wow, fuck. The million things needing to be understood sat there. The questions needing asked and answered so he could make sure this didn”t happen ever again. There will be time. He considered that, glancing around as a tug-of-war broke out in his body. He regarded her hand, sure of at least one thing. This would not end in a handshake. It was fucking more, and he wanted her to at least know that. “I never sealed our deal.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“I owe you a kiss.”

He stared at her, seeing he’d said something wrong. Again.

“You look a-here,” she said carefully, her fierce side returning till she shook with whatever deadly defect he’d just managed. “If there is anything… on God’s green earth that I will never .... ever .... take as a payment from you, it is a God. Damn. Kiss.” Her eyes clenched shut. “Christ almighty, you done turned me into a sinner,” she muttered, shooting off down the pier toward the house.

Ethan stood there, watching her. His dumbfounded shock was one for the books. In all his complex calculations, he somehow managed to predict exactly the wrong things, every time with her.

He made his way back, unable to deny the relief that she wasn’t leaving. But he also knew this bump in the road was far from resolved. The next thing out of his mouth would no doubt be a fatal flaw because that’s how everything was turning out with her. She was off-the-charts pissed about the kiss they’d agreed to for a contract signing. Did she want sex instead now? How would he ever find that out without hanging himself?

Back inside, he gave her space and went to his office. He looked at his phone as he paced, wanting to call Eveque. But he really couldn’t take how fucking funny he’d no doubt find all of this. Wasn’t like he didn’t know there would be bumps in the road, he did know that. He was always creating the path of least resistance, that’s all. And that plan had not changed. He just needed to navigate this.

Fuck it. He found his number and dialed it, back to pacing.

“T-Bit,” Eveque answered, his tone already knowing somehow.

“I could stand having a conversation without being laughed at right now. Do you think you can manage or do I need to call back later?”

“I will do my very best for you, mon frier,” he offered.

8-Bit took it, having no choice. He paced a couple steps, his brain in a system freeze. He took a breath and closed his eyes, going for a full reboot.

“Take your time.”

“I’m trying to formulate.”

“Oui,” he said, all knowing. “Allow me to give you a shortcut. There is no formula.”

He still refused to believe that but didn’t want to argue. “We had an arrangement, right?”

“Oui.”

“We both agreed.”

“Oui.”

“We still…both agree.”

“Very good.”

“She’s…she’s having a little trouble.”

“She’s moving too fast,” he said.

“Yes!”

“And you need it to go slow.”

“We need it to go slow.”

“Remind me, monfrier, what we are going slow with again?”

“Everything.”

“Ahhh, that’s very broad,” he said, indicating his entire problem. “She will need clear exacts. Women seem to categorize things differently. Like… to us, sex may mean fucking, but to her, it’s everything else that goes with it.”

Excitement filled him at these insights. “What exactly is everything else?”

“Well, if she really likes you, then everything you think, do, and say—regardless of if you think you said it or did it—is all part of fucking. A man tends to partition these things and a woman cannot seem to separate them. And whatever you do, do not make the mistake of thinking you can avoid this mess by not saying or doing anything, no, no, no,” he warned lightly. “Everything you don’t say and don’t do will count against you in a woman’s court of law. The only justice you will ever find is in her mercy.”

Unbelievable.

“But I have good news.”

He froze, waiting.

“You want to hear it?”

“Eveque, if my ears open any more, my fucking brain might fall out.”

“Oui,” he said, laughter threatening. “Fucking fixes everything. Like a factory reset.”

“Which fucking? My kind or hers?”

“Definitely your kind. It takes practice but you will learn how to do all of it, and it will even look seamless.”

Ethan wasn’t happy with this, nor was he convinced it was correct with every woman and every man. “You’re saying I need to learn how to juggle balls and fuck at the same time.”

“Oui.”

“Oui,” he repeated, hating the word.

“My suggestion is finding somebody she can talk to. On top of all the mess we accidentally create when fixing things, we’re also a disease that disables their ability to think straight.”

“Well, that’s becoming a two-way street,” he assured.

“Don’t allow her to change the facts.”

“Which are?”

“You want her more than you’ve ever wanted anything. Oui?”

He slid his hand over his forehead. “Yes,” he admitted.

“And she is in the same boat?”

“I…yes. I think,” he added, sure of nothing now.

“Go with your male gut on that one, mon frier. She wants to fuck?”

“God…yes, she begs for it without words.”

“Well, that will change.”

“How?” he wondered, hope and dread clashing.

“She will begin using very precise words. And tactics you will not be able to resist.”

“Like what?” he wondered, disturbed at this news.

“Like force. And if you’re able to resist her when she resorts to this deadly tactic, let me know so we can put it in our survival manual.”

“I gave her two orgasms!”

“Ohhhhh, mon frier,” he said, like he’d committed a fatal mistake. “This is not seen by a woman the way it is seen by a man.”

“Total shock.”

“A woman expresses love by giving you pleasure. Have you let her do that yet?”

“No!”

“Because you will lose your mind, I get it. But this is seen as the greatest rejection.”

“Me not letting her give me pleasure?”

“Oui,” he said like it was both obvious and true. And while Ethan knew it was true in their case, it was hardly an obvious truth. “She sees that as you not wanting her love or her love not being good enough.”

“And then, mistake of all mistakes, I suggested we seal our marriage agreement with a kiss—like we agreed to before. I thought I needed to show her I was serious about our arrangement still and—” Ethan stopped at Bishops moan of doom. “What?!”

“First you offer this kiss like some kind of deal then again after a fight?”

“They kiss at the end of a marriage ceremony!” he cried quietly in his defense.

“Mon Dieu, that kiss is symbolic, T-Bit. The crowning of a sacred union. To use it as a handshake in a deal or band-aid after a fight is the greatest insult.”

He had to laugh. “She wanted a handshake,” he said.

“It would have been a lot more appropriate.”

“No shit. She thought I was paying her with it, but I was trying to show her what she means to me, that she means a marriage to me, a lifelong commitment, the whole package!”

“Oui.”

Ethan mentally shoved off his pity, fucking pissed. In general.

“I have more good news.”

“What,” he muttered. “I’m fucking exhausted.”

“If she loves you, she will be very good at forgiving. You just have to find a way to make her understand what’s in your heart.”

“How? All I got are algorithms then error messages all over the place.”

“There is one language that does not need words. And you have no reason not to use it.”

He closed his eyes, already knowing. “I can’t.”

“You can. You’re stronger than your past. You’re the leader of the Tech Hatch, the fucking best. And my favorite,” he added, the tacked on stupidity bringing a shot of laughter.

“You laugh,” he said, offended. “You will always be my T-Bit, oui?”

Ethan nodded. “Always. Would you like a kiss? I’m giving them out in all the wrong ways and for all the wrong reasons.” Ethan nodded at his laughter. “Maybe you can start a comic in the Nouvelles. Or a metaphorical obituary. Today, another Twelve succumbed to the error of his wondrous stupidity. Beat and buried alive by his wife. Survived by nobody because he’s too stupid to have family.”

A full minute later, Bishop managed, “What you need is a real mess. Like a Hurricane in two days to take your mind off it. You okay on that front?”

“Yes,” he sighed. “The Hurricane Hack squad is on auto-pilot. Updated yesterday.”

“Very good. Your Hurricane Hacks were always the best.”

“Not sure about that,” he said, wondering what Cat was doing.

“You’ve been ranked #1 for two seasons straight,” he cried.

The odd information scrambled his brain. “Number one in what?”

“The Hurricane Huster List in the Nouvelle! You did not know of this?”

“I don’t read the Nouvelle’s, I submit data to it.”

“Meh, maybe that’s your problem.”

“What? What else is my problem? Pile it on.”

“You need to take a break from the data and experience life in another format. And hey…how about that’sanorder. See to it immediately. And report to me after. In a conversation over Kool-aid, not a spreadsheet, oui?”

He was fucking dead serious. “Oui,” he said.

“Take her on a date.”

“She hunts. And fishes.”

“Then take her fishing and hunting,” he said, like it wasn’t rocket science.

But with Cat, everything was science. She was her own science. And the sooner he learned it, the better the entire fucking world would be.

“Fine. I will. If you find me dead, just know I went down fighting about something that had nothing to do with the reason for my death.”

“Mon Dieu, you fucking kill me,” he said, ending the call on wheezing laughter.

Ethan stood there, contemplating everything. A date. A hunting date? Fishing? It occurred to him in a panic, and he dialed Eveque again. The second he picked up, he wondered, “Why wouldn’t she take my hunting or fishing proposal as an insult too?”

“Because you won’t use it like it’s some kind of deal or bandage.”

“So just…”

“You want to go hunting or fishing.”

“But I don’t. At this time.”

“Make it relevant, T-Bit.”

Relevant.

“There’s a Hurricane coming. We can always stand to have a surplus of fresh food, oui? And you’re short-handed due to the prep. If she’s anything like Ma Petite, she loves helping others.”

“Oh, this is her way of life.”

“And Bingo was his name.”

Relief began to enter the mix. “Thank you.”

“I’ll take that in fried cat-fish.”

“You got it.”

Ethan hung up. “Big G.”

“Yes, Ethan?”

“Where is Cat?”

“According to the tracking device in her ring, she’s in your room.”

“Can you…find out how she’s doing? Without her knowing I asked you to? I need a read out on her current…” Fuck, he sounded like a robot. “I need to know how she’s feeling.”

“I will engage Cat in a conversation and gather data that would allow you to sufficiently arrive at that information.”

“Thank you. Can you do that right away?”

“I’ll do it immediately.”

“Big G,” he called at the last second.

“Yes, Ethan?”

“Thank you, brother. For everything.”

“Always my pleasure.”