Bear's Silent Soulmate : A Fated Mate Shifter Romance

Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Callisto

She’d caught Rory off guard. Woken him from a dead sleep.

She was lucky she didn’t come face to face with a fierce, startled grizzly, but she couldn’t help it.

She’d tossed and turned for hours, lying next to Sophia, who was sleeping soundly and was blissfully content. Callisto kept thinking about what she’d said earlier. About the people of Greenacre not knowing. Even though she’d given her oath and could no longer hurt them, she still needed to know. Far more terrible than her need to destroy a whole clan, was the terrible hole that had always been inside of her. She wanted to know who she was. Where she’d come from. The only way she could do that was to observe her brother and sister from afar, the ones here in Greenacre, until she could meet them in person if they ever trusted her enough for that.

Watching Rory and his son with those two little girls ripped the scab off a wound that was never going to heal. She’d never been properly loved in her life by anyone who was supposed to have looked after her. She’d been doing that for herself for as long as she could remember. Even though she’d never been taught how to love, she’d learned. Learned it for Sophia’s sake and for all the broken women she gathered about her. They were her friends, family, and clan.

Rory blinked sleep from his eyes. She could tell by the way he tensed that adrenaline started to course through him, but it wasn’t the kind that led to an uncontrolled shift.

She openly stared at him. He was huge, but he was obviously a gentle giant. He made the couch look like doll furniture beneath him because he was so massive. He was muscled and big enough to be deadly. He was a literal butcher, and yet, he was embarrassed over being caught asleep, vulnerable, warm, and a little sweaty. He’d whipped the blanket down around him to cover his bare legs, but not before she’d seen the bulging muscles and veins that roped through them. His forearms were the same, and if he removed that t-shirt, she knew he’d be chiseled to the point of perfection underneath.

He was all man, feral and raw and beautiful to look at, but there was still something boyish and innocent about him. She’d never met a man who she considered to be more light than dark before, but his spirit shone bright.

It was almost easy for her to believe that Sophia was right. She couldn’t imagine Rory thinking that murdering children or harming them in any way was alright.

She waited expectantly for him to respond. He licked his lips to wet them and raked a hand through his hair before shifting uncomfortably on the couch. “Would you like to sit? I’m not sure I can have this conversation with you standing like that.”

She didn’t understand why not, but she dropped into one of the two armchairs closest to him. The living room was set up in a sort of square, like most, with a TV mounted on the wall and random sound stuff underneath on a smaller stand. A square coffee table and two end tables as well as one other leather chair comprised the rest of the furniture, but it was all that would fit in the small space. There was a stained-glass lamp between them with a yellow shade boasting flowers. She turned it on so he could read what she wrote without it being shoved directly in his face.

“Where do I start?” It didn’t seem like a question that needed answering. “Well, there’s Sam and Lily. They have a big family. Most people here do. Trace and Josephine run the clinic. I watched their kids for a good while when they were small. The twins and the triplets. Uh, Sebastian and Stephanie have a big brood. Most of us found love later in life, and we already had children, so we’ve become combined families.”

He shifted, sitting up a little higher, and the couch creaked like it was going to break beneath him. There was a slant of moonlight coming through the open blinds of the windows. They didn’t ever seem to be twisted closed since they were up so high. The silver glow illuminated the hard planes of Rory’s face. He was a decent looking man, but the moonlight did something enchanting. It highlighted every crag, which only made him appear more rugged, and illuminated the fine bristle of stubble along his hard jaw. His hair wasn’t long enough for an elastic. It was too long to be well groomed and so it appeared almost shaggy.

She nodded, encouraging him to continue, wondering at the little jolt that shot through her fingertips when she thought about finger-combing the dark strands of his hair. That wasn’t her MO when it came to desire. She didn’t want to desire this man in any way, so she wasn’t sure what the hell that reaction was.

“Glendy runs the shop on main street. The little boutique. She and Thaddius have a few kids. She shares her eldest with Clay. He lives here now too, but he was from Pinefall originally.”

She didn’t move. She forced herself to breathe regularly. It would do zero good to show any of her wild excitement at the mention of her brother’s name. She scrawled what she needed to say on her notepad and turned it to him.

PINEFALL? THAT’S THE CLAN BESIDE YOU.

She couldn’t pretend that she knew nothing about it when she’d known enough to find Greenacre and challenge their alpha.

“That’s right. Honestly, we don’t know that much about them. They bought the land from us, but even though they’re welcome here, they don’t really like to mix. They’re very private. Glendy is a human and Clay is a bear. I guess when they were married, he had to leave the clan to do that. It didn’t work out, but when they came from Texas to move up here, she followed him and brought Emma so she could see her dad. She ended up meeting someone here and getting mated. You’d think it would be awkward, but it’s not. They’re both happy and they’re good people,” Rory paused, and Callisto watched as he scrubbed his big hand across his face, shifting the curls out of the way. Once again, she almost had to fight the urge to run her fingers through his hair. He shifted in the seat and continued, “Clay has a sister here as well. Taylee. She has kind of a wild story, she was hurt in a car accident and lost her memory. Not long after she’d given birth to her daughter, she and her brother were on the way to collect the little shifter girl that she and Kier planned on adopting. Never did get her memory back. Her mate, Kier—one of the guards you saw at Sam’s cabin that first day you uh—got here… they had to get to know each other and fall in love all over again. It might not have worked out for them, but they had a baby together and a newly adopted kid, and there was no way Kier was going to give up. I suppose even if they hadn’t been children involved, he wouldn’t have given up on his love for her.”

Her heart raced wildly. Taylee. Her sister. She knew nothing of the memory loss. That must have been so scary and painful.

SHE WAS FROM PINEFALL TOO?

Rory nodded after reading what she’d written. “That’s right. I guess she and Kier met doing guard duty where our lands border each other. I’m not sure how they fell in love, but it happened. He couldn’t go there. Pinefall doesn’t let people in who aren’t part of their clan, even shifters, but she was welcome here.”

REALLY? THAT SEEMS STRANGE. HOW DO THEY FIND AND TAKE MATES THEN? WOULDN’T THEY ALL BE RELATED?

Rory shook his head. “I don’t know enough about how it works, but I guess not. I suppose when they started, it was a clan consisting of multiple families, enough to ensure their survival, but I think that many have also left. They’re welcome back. I mean, I think they are, if they ever want to come back. And their children are welcome there.”

JUST NOT THEIR MATES. THAT SEEMS HARSH.

A shrug that meant it wasn’t his place to say. Rory did seem like the diplomatic type.

She didn’t want to draw attention to her interest in Pinefall or Taylee or Clay. It was hard to change the topic, but she forced herself to do it anyway.

WHAT DID YOU WANT IN A MATE? I’M SURE IT WASN’T THIS.

The way Rory’s face turned a bright red shouldn’t have been charming, but his flustered reaction did frustrating things to her body. “I don’t rightly know.” There was an edge to his voice that said he did. He couldn’t meet her eyes either.

She was going to have to write a virtual novel and it was annoying that she had no other way to communicate, but he sat there quietly, waiting until she finished and passed him the notebook.

IT’S OK THAT YOU DIDN’T WANT THIS. IT’S OKAY TO WANT MORE FOR YOURSELF. IT’S OKAY TO WANT TO LOVE AND BE LOVED BACK. FOR ME, I NEVER WANTED IT. I STILL DON’T WANT IT. THE BEST I CAN GIVE YOU IS TO TRY AND ACCEPT MY SITUATION AND MY NEW LIFE. TO DEVELOP RESPECT BETWEEN US. I’M NOT NATURALLY A WARM PERSON. THERE WERE THINGS IN MY PAST THAT HAVE MADE IT HARD TO TRUST. I’M CAPABLE OF LOVING MY CLAN, BUT ROMANTIC LOVE ISN’T FOR ME. I’M TRULY SORRY IF THIS DISAPPOINTS YOU.

Rory read carefully and then re-read, his eyes scanning the lines on the page. He finally looked up and this time he met her eyes. His eyes were glistening, but he blinked, and his expression changed. Not hardened. He didn’t seem to have an ounce of hardness in him.

“I understand. Thank you for telling me. At this stage in my life, I hadn’t hoped to have a mate. I have no expectations of you. It was rough, the way we started. If we could find some level of trust and respect, that could turn into a friendship. All I truly want is peace in my household for my children and peace and goodness in my clan, also for their sake. Greenacre wasn’t always this way. Some of us remember when it was a much harder place. I’m nearly fifty. I think the time for love has passed. I’m not jealous of those who have found it here. Love has made our community a better place and strengthened our clan. I never expected to be bowled over, the flames of love like a forest fire that couldn’t be doused. Not at this age. I’m much more of a realist.” He shook his head, a wry smile playing over his lips like maybe he wasn’t always that way.

Callisto thought of Fraiser. He looked too much like Rory not to be his. He wasn’t adopted. Had Rory loved his mother? Had he lost her? Fraiser was nearly eighteen and Rory just said Greenacre wasn’t always a great place. Maybe it was more like Pinefall. Maybe he’d fallen in love with a woman he couldn’t have. Maybe she didn’t even know what he was and couldn’t. Maybe it was just a fling and he wanted more but she didn’t. Whatever had happened, it was clear that Rory had been somewhat hurt by it, but had moved on and healed.

Callisto was excellent at reading expressions and that’s what she got from that forlorn smile before it dropped away.

“Do you want to hear more? About the rest of the clan? Maybe it would be easier to show you. I do understand that it’s going to be slow going. I hope you don’t feel… wounded by that. I hope you’re not put off. I tried to explain earlier, but I’m not so sure I did a good job of it. I’m just a butcher. I’m no politician, not a soldier or a guard, and I certainly have no elegance when it comes to words.”

She didn’t believe that was true, but she let it pass.

Relief washed over her, a relief so great that her hand shook as she wrote. Rory didn’t expect this to work out. He didn’t expect a happy ending, he wouldn’t become attached to her. It was the best she could hope for, given that she was going to betray him, and she didn’t want to hurt him in the process. Hurt him more than she had to, at any rate. Betrayal always stung. It would hurt his pride and his image in his clan when his mate—even if everyone knew she was a bad, forced mate—did the unthinkable to the neighboring clan.

What that unthinkable was, she still hadn’t quite decided. She had so many nebulous, terrible options to choose from. So many fitting punishments. She was a just person, built with a strong sense of right and wrong. She stood up for those who needed it. Protected and sheltered those who had been hurt and abused. She wouldn’t punish beyond what was necessary.

All she had to go on her whole life was other people’s words. She had to find out for herself and make absolutely certain that they were true. Being ninety-nine percent sure wasn’t enough.

PLEASE TELL ME MORE. I’LL LISTEN TO EVERYTHING YOU HAVE TO SAY.

She recapped her pen, turned the notebook, and pulled up her knees in the chair. She’d put her leggings and tunic back on and she curled into a black clad ball, ready and eager to listen, even if it took the rest of the night.