Chapter 72
Chapter Seventy-Two
BELLAMY
“ H ungry?” I turned to see Leoni and Driscoll standing behind me on the terrace.
The starry night spread out above. Driscoll held up a tray full of bread, jam, and some kind of stew that made my stomach turn. I almost hadn’t come out here. I’d been holed up in my room for the last three days, refusing to see anyone. My brothers ignored that and barged in on me anyway, but they quickly realized I wasn’t in the mood to talk.
But tonight I desperately needed fresh air, and of course, the moment I emerged from my chambers, Driscoll and Leoni found me.
I’d barely been able to eat anything since the battle. Since... I swallowed. Since I’d lost Kairoth.
I turned back to stare at the sky above. Once Kairoth died, all the shadows he’d commanded disappeared along with him, and so did all the magical items that had been created from those shadows. The island was free now.
I just wished it felt more like a victory instead of a funeral.
“You both should go,” I said. “Everyone else has already left.”
Even the boys of Neverland had left. Most of them. Some decided to stay here, stating that it was more of a home than anywhere else could be. Others left with the pirate lord, who promised them a new home he and Princess Gabrielle had found.
“Leoni,” I continued, “you’re captain of the guard for Queen Poppy, and Driscoll, you’re a soon-to-be king.”
“Queen,” he said. “I like queen better. It really does have a ring to it.”
He let out an oomph, and I assumed Leoni elbowed him.
“Right. Not the point. Though I do want to talk about the fact that I have a betrothed, and he happens to be a king.”
“All you’ve done is talk about it, Driscoll. Nonstop. To anyone who will listen. You single-handedly cleared out the dining hall last night because everyone was so sick of hearing about it.”
“Not me,” a deep voice said. Aron.
He hadn’t left yet either, despite the fact that he needed to get back to Fyriad. He was king now. He had a big weight on his shoulders. But he’d handle it. Especially with Driscoll at his side.
“Like I said.” I cleared my throat. “You three have many responsibilities you need to return to.”
“Oh, stop trying to push us away.” Driscoll came up on one side of me, leaning on the balcony. Leoni and Aron came up on the other. “We’re not going anywhere until we know you’re fine.”
I rolled my eyes. “I’ve got my brothers.”
“Yeah, but they’re brothers.” Driscoll waved a hand in the air. “We’re your friends. You can’t talk about some of this stuff with your brothers. I mean, were you going to tell them about your shadow daddy?” Leoni leaned over and swatted him on the back of his head.
“Ow!” He rubbed it. “Uncalled for.”
“You’re uncalled for.”
He stuck out his tongue.
“I think what Driscoll is trying to say,” Aron said, “is that we’re here for you because we care.”
Tears gathered in the corners of my eyes. “Thank you,” I choked out. “I just can’t believe he’s gone.”
“He did a brave thing,” Leoni said. “A good thing. Everyone thought of him as this monstrous beast, but in the end, he really was a hero.”
I let out a sob, my shoulders shaking.
Driscoll squeezed my arm, and Leoni leaned into me.
“How did you know the magic would do that?” Driscoll asked. “I mean, what did you find in Khalasa’s mind that helped you figure it all out?”
I wiped away my tears. “The answer wasn’t in Khalasa’s mind.” I paused. “It was a hunch, but based on everything I read in my father’s journals, based on everything I’d learned from Kairoth and Khalasa, I just realized that the magic was trying to protect itself. It had chosen leaders, and it chose wrong. It thought it had found a partner, people who could do good with it, use it, make it flourish. But instead, they turned greedy and power hungry. So the magic helped my father trap them. My father didn’t realize it at the time, but that’s what the magic was doing. Then, when my father rejected the net, the power, the magic decided to destroy everything, start over.” I shook my head. “It put itself out there again when my father returned a thousand years later, and this time, I think things were better.”
“Until the gods got free,” Driscoll said, shaking his head. “Then the magic decided to destroy the earth again.”
I nodded. “But we all worked together to convince it that we were worth saving. That it wasn’t alone. That it didn’t have to work by itself. We could help it. So it helped us.”
“Wow,” Leoni said. “All this time, the magic has had a mind of its own. It’s a little scary. It could just decide to destroy us all.”
I stared out at the dark waves crashing on the shore in the distance. “I don’t think it will. It doesn’t want to. It wants to be used. It just doesn’t want to be abused.”
Aron nodded, brows furrowed. “You saved us all, Bellamy. We owe you a great debt.”
I shook my head. “I don’t want anything.” Except the one thing I couldn’t have.
“So what now? What’s next for you?” Driscoll asked.
My brothers wanted to leave for the star court immediately, begin to rebuild, which would be hard when all we had was the Wilds, an untamed land full of creatures who no longer had star magic. But I had a feeling the magic would right itself. That if it wanted star elementals, it would grant mortals that power again. Things would balance out. They always seemed to.
“Jorah wants to go home. Ryder wants to stay here and rebuild the shadow court, my father’s home.”
“What do you want?” Driscoll asked.
I thought about my father’s journal entries, my father’s long life, and ultimately what had mattered to him in the end. “I don’t know,” I said simply.
“You could be queen, you know,” Aron said. “You could rule the star court. No one would stop you.”
“I don’t want that.” I’d spent so long fighting to save my brothers that I’d never stopped to think about what I wanted after, and now, the truth was, I had no idea. But I knew I didn’t want to be a ruler. Jorah would be an amazing king. Ryder would be as well. Phoenix and Soloman would both make great advisors. Killian and Klaus would make amazing generals. And Marcello would keep all their spirits lifted. He’d play music and make art and make the world a better place.
But me? I wasn’t sure where I fit into any of it.
“I think I need a walk to clear my head.” I turned to them. “Can you cover for me?”
Driscoll’s eyes widened. “Cover for you? Are you going to do something crazy? Because if something happens to you, your brothers will kill us.”
I turned to him. “I didn’t spend sixty years trying to break a curse and reunite with my brothers just to do something stupid now. It’s just a walk, Driscoll.”
He, Leoni, and Aron looked at each other.
“Okay,” Driscoll said finally. “But we’re watching you.” He pointed two fingers at his eyes, then at me.
I wandered aimlessly through the jungle until I came to the black-sand shores. Water washed up on the beach, and I took off my boots and walked barefoot. The squishy sand felt good between my toes, the water warm and inviting. Sea salt clung to the air, everything smelling so fresh, so new. Maybe it was new, in a way. A new beginning for this world. For everyone who lived in it. Fog rolled in as I walked, getting thicker, making it harder to see.
I needed to turn back soon. Leoni, Driscoll, and Aron would only be able to cover for me so long before my brothers found out I’d snuck away.
I turned, the hairs on the back of my neck raising and making me pause. A figure emerged from the fog.
Big, broad shoulders. I took a step back, ready to run or fight, but as the figure came closer, I recognized his wavy dark hair, those amber eyes, the scars on his face.
I rubbed my eyes, wondering if I was going insane. If I was seeing things. But it was him. In the flesh.
I took off at a run, sand flying up behind me as I barreled into Kairoth.
He wrapped his arms around me, lifting me and whirling me around while I cupped his face and kissed him again and again and again.
“How are you here?” I asked when he finally set me down.
I couldn’t stop running my hands over him, touching every part of him to make sure he was real.
“This isn’t possible,” I stared up at him.
“I don’t know.” He reached up a hand to scratch the back of his head. “One minute, I was in more pain than I’d ever felt in my entire existence, and the next, I was washing up on the shore. I started walking to find you, and then, here you were. Like the most magnificent vision.”
“Kairoth, the magic. It gave you back.” I pressed a hand to his heart. “It knew you. It knew you weren’t a monster like them. And it gave you back to me.” I hugged him tight, tears streaming down my face.
Bloody stars, the amount I was crying these days.
“Hey.” He thumbed away a tear.
“Happy tears,” I said, sniffling.
He looked down at his hands, his arms. “I don’t have magic anymore,” he said. “None at all.”
I looked at him, realizing his shadowy beast was gone.
“How do you feel about that?” I asked.
His face broke out into a smile. Without his shadows he looked so young. So unburdened. “I feel alive.”
I started laughing, and soon we were both laughing.
He caught me in his arms again, taking my breath away as he stared down at me.
“So what now, Bellamy?”
Driscoll and Leoni had just asked me that very question, and I hadn’t had an answer, yet now it came to me so easily.
“We rebuild my father’s farm,” I said. “We make a home.”
“A family,” he added.
I nodded. “A family.”
He leaned forward and pressed his lips to mine. “That sounds perfect. It sounds like everything I’ve ever dreamed of.”
And it would be. It truly would be.