Chapter 4
“What did you tell them? I moved away from here for a reason, and you decided to share details about my life with them! You are officially stripped of best friend status. You don’t even know them! How could you?” I yell at Skylar.
“You need to get out of the slump you’re in, and Phoenix promised orgasms. Plus, it’s not like you actually told me why you ran away besides someone broke your heart. Also, they seemed harmless, and I didn’t tell them anything else. Just that you live here now. I didn’t tell them where we live!” she argues.
“You had no right to tell them anything about me. Knox, the one with the piercings, is a misogynistic asshole who seems to treat women as whores. If I wanted them to know anything about me, I would have told them.” I rolled my eyes at her and continued to bitch.
We just got home from the beach, and I had decided not to fight with her until we got home. I didn’t want anyone watching or listening in. I can’t believe she told them things about me; how stupid is she? Has she never heard of stranger danger? These guys are bad news, and I want no part of it. Especially with how Knox treated me today. No, thank you. I don’t need to get involved with someone like that. Not again at least. They broke me when I was eighteen, and I promised myself I would never be treated like that again.
My last boyfriend, back in Florida, didn’t care enough about me and cheated on me. And like the stupid woman I am, I fell for his shit and made the mistake of not getting to know him before jumping into bed with him.
I am trying to change my ways, meaning their personality counts, regardless of appearance. Right?? Knox is hot, and he is confident, that’s for sure. How he talked to me was degrading, but why did it make me wet? I do a mental face palm. Probably because he has aged well over the last five years. Stupid handsome men. I remember how he used to fuck me and call me a good girl. I don’t want to want him, but I can’t just forget the way he and the others made me feel, no matter how hard I try. Fucking hell, I knew coming back here would bring up memories, but sexual ones were not what I had in mind.
“Well, you need to get laid. I don’t see what the big deal is. I meet random strangers all the time and fuck them. Who cares if they’re assholes? It’s not like I will see them more than once. Not to be mean, babe, but you need to step out of your shell more. Go have a one-night stand; have some fun, it won’t kill you,” Sky says.
“You’ve been my best friend forever, Sky, so you should know by now that I don’t do one-night stands, and I won’t start now. I love you, but I am so pissed at you right now. I am going to my room for the night. And by the way, they were more than a one-night stand. They are my past and the reason I ran away in the first place,” I say to her as I walk to my room. I still can’t believe she gave them information about me.
I wonder how many women named Meadow there are living in San Diego. Hopefully, they won’t know where to look. The unfortunate issue is that they know my last name and have some very skilled hackers on their payroll who can find just about anything. Ugh, why did I think coming back here was a good idea? I was hoping they would have moved on by now. It’s been five damn years.
I decide to order dinner tonight because I don’t feel like spending time with Skylar after what she did. She violated my trust, and until she realizes that what she did was wrong, I don’t feel like talking to her. Instead, I am going to finish my book because, Wow! Macy and Silas are unique; their love for each other is extraordinary, and I love how the author wrote the characters. Before I pull out my Kindle, I call the local Chinese restaurant that delivers and order sesame chicken and pork fried rice. I am not that hungry, so this will hold me over for the rest of the night.
Our apartment buzzer goes off a little later, so I head to the door to grab my food. Sky is on the couch watching reality TV—I am not a fan of reality TV, so I am glad to be in my room reading. I have no desire to listen to that nonsense all night. She looks up as I walk by but says nothing to me. Good, because I don’t want to talk to her.
I grab my food and a drink from the fridge before returning to my room. Making myself comfortable on my bed, I devour the food, almost putting myself into a food coma from eating so much. Once I’ve finished stuffing my face, I clean up my mess and lie down. So what if it’s only eight-thirty at night? I deserve to relax after getting sunburned and hit on by a hot-as-fuck asshole. Eventually, I slowly drift off to sleep.
I wake suddenly to find someone standing outside my window. “Hello, who is there?” I ask quietly.
“I told you that you would be seeing me real soon, didn’t I, baby?” Knox says.
“How did you find me?” I ask.
“Don’t worry about that. Now, take off your shirt and show me those beautiful tits you were showing off earlier. I want a taste. I’ve been starving since I left the beach.”
He walks over to my bed and yanks off my tank top. I hear him groan, and suddenly, he latches on to my left nipple, licking and sucking on it like a dying man who needs my nipples to survive. He switches to my right breast and devours it just the same. I am a needy mess, moaning his name and cursing with how fucking good this feels. I shouldn’t allow this, but I won’t tell him to stop.
“Knox, please,” I beg as he trails kisses lower and lower down my body until he reaches my soaked panties. He looks up at me with those beautiful chocolate eyes, grabs both sides of my panties, and tears them off my body. Kissing my left hip, then right; he grabs my thighs and forces them open. I can’t believe how wet I am right now. I shouldn’t be doing this but, fuck, it feels so good. Using his fingers, he spreads me open, then places his mouth on my clit and sucks hard. I scream his name as the most intense orgasm of my life rips through me, and he’s barely even touched me.
He licks and sucks me through my orgasm until I’m spasming and pushing his head away from overstimulation. Licking his lips, he climbs up my body and kisses me so hard, I know I will have swollen, bruised lips in the morning. He whispers in my ear, “Meadow, wake up!” His voice sounds like Sky; how weird. I jolt straight up when I realize I just had a sex dream about Knox while Skylar is leaning over me.
“Jesus Christ, Sky, way to give me a damn heart attack,” I say between panted breaths.
“Sorry, but you were screaming and moaning. I figured you had a nightmare, so I came running in. Now that I know you’re okay, it looks more than okay. I will let you get back to it.” She winks at me before leaving my room.
What the fuck? I just had a sex dream about Knox. Did seeing him affect me that much? I need a cold shower; I am sweaty and feel like I just ran a marathon. Checking the time on my phone, I notice it’s four in the morning. I know I’m not going back to sleep anytime soon, so I head to the bathroom, turn on the shower, strip out of my clothes, and step under the cold spray. I rest my head on the cool tiles while water runs down my back.
After taking a few minutes to calm myself down, I turn the water to a warmer temperature and wash my body. I am still very sensitive from my orgasm earlier, so when I touch myself, I can’t help but let out a little moan. This is crazy. I have never been this sensitive from an orgasm before. I can’t believe I came that hard from a dream! I wonder if sleeping with him again would be as good as that dream. No, I will never see him again, so I’m not sure why I am thinking about how good he would be in bed. My inner hussy knows it’s because his dick is magical and can send me to another dimension.
After my shower, I go to the kitchen and make myself eggs and toast. I usually eat healthy for breakfast, so I can pig out later in the day. I don’t know how to cook, hence the eggs and toast. I finally learned how to make over-medium eggs, though. The first time I tried, they ended up burnt, and the second time, they were so watery; I don’t even think they were cooked. I had thrown it all away and picked up donuts from Broad Street Dough Co.
I remember how Aidan used to cook for me, so I didn’t have to worry, but I am a big girl, and I had to learn, so I could feed myself after I left town. As I make my eggs, I hear Sky moving around in her room, which is weird because it’s like five AM. I guess she couldn’t get back to sleep, either.
Taking my breakfast over to the table, I sit and eat while scrolling through TikTok and checking my social media accounts. I love some of these BookTok accounts; I have so many books on my T.B.R. list from TikTok that it’s ridiculous. Sky walks down the hallway and gives me a nod. I am unsure if I want to talk to her yet, though. I’m still pissed off from yesterday. She hasn’t apologized yet, not truly, anyway.
Sky looks at me and asks, “You done being mad at me yet?”
“Did you seriously just ask me that? Are you kidding me? Why do you think that what you did was okay? You violated my trust and the girl code. Not to mention stranger danger and that you just met these people! Maybe if you had known them for a while, I wouldn’t be as pissed, but you had just met him. He only talked to you to get information on me. How in your right mind can you think that is okay?” I go off on Skylar.
“You act like I am terrible. Phoenix was completely honest about what he wanted with you. Do you think I didn’t ask? He seemed cool; I don’t see what the big fucking deal is. I didn’t give him our address. I just said we live here in the city. I didn’t betray your trust; it’s not like I told them where you worked or gave them your phone number or anything important. I am not a complete idiot. Call one of your guys because you have a serious stick up your ass right now and need to chill the fuck out. I can’t believe you are this mad over nothing. We have been friends for years, and this is the way you treat me for telling some guy your name? Get over it and get laid!” Skylar yells back at me.
She storms out of the room and slams her door shut. Am I the bad guy right now? She betrayed my trust. But I may be overreacting. I do need to get laid, especially after last night’s dream. I rest my forehead on the table and start smacking it lightly against the hard surface. Ugh, why am I this way sometimes? I wish I could be more outgoing like Skylar.
After exhaling a breath, I get up and walk to her door. Knocking lightly, I say, “I am sorry, you’re right. Can I come in and talk to you? I want you to understand where I am coming from. Please let me in.” The door opens, and staring at me is my very pissed off best friend.
“Well, get on with it; I don’t have all day. I have shit to do, like betray your trust again,” she spits at me, venom in her voice.
I go in and sit down on her bed. “I guess I am pissed because it felt like you didn’t even consider whether I wanted them to know who I was or not. I get that you only told them that we live here, but Knox was a complete asshole to me. And I have a very bad past with them. I don’t talk about my childhood for a reason. I know you weren’t around for what happened back then. I just wish you had talked to me before. I am sorry I got so upset, but it felt like you only did it so I could get laid. You didn’t account for how I would feel and that hurt. I can’t just sleep with someone. I am not like you,” I say, trying to explain.
“You could have just talked to me instead of sulking in your room all night. Seriously, the only thing I told them was that we live in here. I thought he was a good enough guy, and you need that after your asshole ex. I can’t believe you thought I would betray your trust. We have been friends for years. It hurts that you think I would do that. I wasn’t saying sleep with him immediately, just get to know him. It would help if you got back out there. Ever since Mark broke your heart, all you do is stay home and read,” she says.
“You’re right. I need to get out more; Mark fucked me up, and I guess I didn’t realize what hermit I had become. I promise I will get out, meet some people, and do some shit, but please ask next time. I know you meant well, but I didn’t take it that way, and for that, I am sorry.” I get up, hug her, and wipe away some tears.
“Want to go get donuts? My breakfast sucked,” I jokingly tell her.
“Yeah, Broad Street Donuts?” she asks.
“I mean, is there any other option?” I joke. We get dressed and start walking to our favorite place.
I can’t seem to get my mind off the guys. I can’t believe they were at the beach the same time I was. I assume that means they actually had a day off and, from what I remember of my childhood, that is hard to come by.
As much as I tried to forget them over the years, it hasn’t stopped me from wondering how they were doing, even though they broke my heart four years ago. Seems no matter how far I travel, I can never escape them. Other than Skylar, my family is gone now. The guys were the only true family I had, and I lost them all in one night. I never thought the men I loved so much would treat me the way they did back then. But the way they acted at the beach makes it seem like they blame me for leaving town. I know I left without saying anything, but I couldn’t face the guys after everything I overheard.
We step into the donut shop, and the smell of freshly baked bread and coffee hits my senses, and I feel at home here. This is part of the reason I came back in the first place. Everything here feels like home. I never found a place in Florida that I felt could be my forever place, and that was when I knew it was time to come back and face the ghosts of my past. I just didn’t think it would be a short few months after coming back. In all honesty, I secretly wished they were still around town, so I could get a glimpse of them. I wonder if they’ve found a girl yet. They had a stupid pact with each other that there would be only one girl for the three of them. I always thought that girl would be me, but things change.
With a heavy sigh, I head to the counter and jump in line, so I can order. This place is always busy—there is always someone in the restaurant—but the food is amazing, so it is worth the wait. A few minutes pass, and I finally make it to the counter to order, so I put in my regular, which is an everything bagel with bacon and cheese, along with a large hazelnut latte, but with an extra shot of espresso. I need the extra caffeine boost today, especially since I didn’t sleep well last night. I wait while Sky puts in her order, then we head to grab a table in the corner. I love this place; the ambiance is wonderful, and the smell is divine. The prices are good which is hard to find in Cali, especially for how delicious everything tastes. When our order is called, I head to grab our food, and as soon as my ass hits the chair, I devour my bagel.
Sky and I start talking about the guy she ditched me for at the beach. Apparently, they have been on-and-off again for months, more of a friends with benefits if you ask me, but what do I know. I am glad Sky is able to get out there and enjoy herself. I sometimes wish I could be as confident as her, but then remember I would have to actually go out and meet people, and that just sounds awful. I will gladly sit on my ass at home and read a book instead. Sky switches topics and tells me that she is going out with someone new tonight. I am excited for her, but damn, how many men does this woman keep on retainer? Not judging but, my goodness, she knows a lot of people. I guess she meets them while she is working.
Sky drones on about the new guy and how she high hopes for him. It is honestly repetition at this point, so I have trouble focusing and instead start to daydream about the guys. A few minutes must pass because Sky says my name, and I look over at her. She asked me a question, but I’m not sure what since I wasn’t listening, so I just say yes. She claps her hands, saying how much fun the two of us will have at the mall today searching for the perfect outfit for her to wear tonight. Fuck me, this is what I get for not listening. I hate shopping; it is always a terrible experience, plus there are way too many people for my liking, and Sky always takes forever. Plastering a fake smile on my face, I tell her I can’t wait. She starts to get up, and I now notice she finished her food already. I guess I zoned out for longer than I thought. Grabbing my latte, we head out to go to the mall, apparently.