Betting on the Brainiac: a Sweet Romantic Comedy

30. Chapter Thirty

My back is against the wall.

Josh and Joey have me flanked. Charlie and Matt are standing near a stack of moving boxes in their 7-Eleven groomsman shirts looking like they aren’t sure if they’re supposed to help me or the two men mean-mugging me.

Of all the obstacles I’d been braced to deal with this week—lines at the county clerk’s office, signing lease agreements for office space and a condo, freaking moving—getting my trash kicked by two guys who I’d made laugh until they cried last weekend at Sami’s birthday party was not one I’d expected. Stupid of me.

“Fellas, is there something I can do for you?” I ask, trying to keep this low-key.

“We hate this,” Joey says.

Josh nods. “What he said.”

“Madi is our friend,” Joey says. “Maybe you’ve noticed that when one of them hurts, all of them hurt. Everything about this is a bad idea.”

“Why is this coming up now?” Charlie asks. “This wedding is all I’ve heard about for a week.”

“We thought you would both come to your senses,” Josh says.

“He means we figured one of you would chicken out,” Joey says. “So now we’re going to make that happen.”

Even my parents didn’t give me this hard a time. Maybe it’s because I told them the whole truth—including how I feel about Madison. My dad still insisted on having his own attorney go over every piece of paperwork before he’d finally concluded that I was protected legally and financially. My mom decided as far as my feelings went, this wouldn’t be much different than being into a neighbor who only saw me as a friend, and I was already planning to avoid Madison whenever possible, so what else was there for them to say if I had my mind made up? And I did. I do.

“We both have all our senses, I promise,” I tell Joey and Josh. This last-minute interrogation is their way of trying to protect Madison, so I don’t let it bother me. “We’ve thought this out. Multiple lawyers have gone over it. Madison is well-protected financially. She comes out ahead, actually.”

“And you get almost two million dollars.”

“I asked for only what Azora needs, and we’ve given her the best possible terms.”

Josh rubs his chin, never breaking eye contact. “You’re not a bad-looking dude. Before you were trying to marry Madison, I thought you were pretty funny. But this has got to be the most pathetic way I’ve heard of to get a girl. You couldn’t just ask her out and risk the no?”

Charlie and Matt both look like they’re going to jump in on my behalf, but I shake my head at them. Matt slides his hands into the pockets of his gym shorts and looks frustrated. Charlie settles back against the wall to wait this out.

“The last thing I would do is ask Madison out,” I tell Josh. “I don’t have time for a relationship right now. I might have had to move closer, but we’ll be seeing each other less. I’m pushing harder to meet our customer demo date so that Madison doesn’t have to worry for even a second about her money, and that means stupid-long hours. I might have time to text about the cats. That’s it.”

“Are you saying Madi isn’t good enough to date?” Joey asks, sounding even more riled.

“No, dude. I’m saying she’s free to date whoever she wants, and if I meet a cool dude, I’ll set them up myself, but I don’t think she’ll need my help.”

“You got that right,” Joey says, but he’s uncrossed his arms. “This really is a business deal?”

“I still don’t like it,” Josh says.

“You looked at Madi’s prenup, right?” I ask him.

“Yes, but a lawyer knows better than anyone that the best loopholes are the subtle ones.”

I flick a glance at the microwave clock in the kitchen. “I’m supposed to be getting married now, I think. Josh, you’ve seen the prenup. It’s solid, and I won’t be looking for any loopholes. She’s going to be fine.”

Joey and Josh trade glances. Joey nods and they both back away. “I gotta go get the music ready in case this wedding still happens.”

“We’ll head out too,” Matt says. “Unless you need me to stay?”

I shake my head. I know he wants to unload on both of these gentlemen, but it’s not their fault they don’t have all the facts. “Let Madi know we’ll be out in a minute.”

Charlie, Matt, and Joey file out, and when the door shuts behind them, I meet Josh’s gaze. “There’s something new you should know . . .”