42. Chapter Eleven
Chapter Eleven
Celeste
Kaien was beaming.
The unexpected sight had Celeste stopping abruptly halfway down the hallway to Nina’s room. It had been ages since she’d seen any trace of true joy from him. Though she could guess the cause, she couldn’t give herself fully over to hope.
She’d spent all night feeling bereft. As soon as her feet had landed on solid ground in Ontario, guilt had plagued her.
Kissing Derikles—and having the audacity to enjoy it—mixed with guilt at loving the way he made her feel. She’d left the territory while her best friend was comatose. Derikles had made her feel something other than despair and loneliness, and he’d done it all in the span of less than twenty-four hours.
She felt like she was betraying her clan and the friends that had treated her like family, and that the happiness his presence brought her was disloyal.
Celeste also felt like Derikles deserved an explanation. After thoroughly beating herself up the night before, she was feeling rather tender by the time she finally made it to Nina’s home.
“Good news?”
Kaien’s grin didn’t falter. When he was within reach, the Raeth’s arms circled around her waist, and he spun her around. It surprised a giggle out of her.
“Nina’s eyes are no longer white, Celeste! She’s definitely getting better!”
She returned his hug burying her face in his chest.
“I’ve already reached out to Nero, and he said the same thing about Key.” Infectious joy spread across his features. “They could wake up, Celeste. They could all wake up!”
Kaien and Zeke eagerly shared the news, and the clan that’d become subdued finally began to awaken. With the positive strides Nina was making, happiness caught like wildfire.
Celeste only wanted to see one person. She sent the man a mental ping and waited on the edge of her seat for his response. Ten minutes passed, then thirty. A couple of hours.
Nothing.
It was afternoon when he finally reached out, making the obligatory mental ping before sending her a telepathic hello. I’m sorry, Celeste.
Hearing the tired apology in his voice instantly made her concerned. Are you okay?
Nothing to worry about . What did you need?
Celeste hesitated. Torn between giving the man his peace and sharing the good news, she bit her lip. On one hand, she could disclose the nature of Nina’s improvement over telepathy, but then she wouldn’t get the benefit of seeing him in person and clarify her bizarre behavior.
I need to explain.
What about?
Derikles’ mental voice seemed distant and fuzzy. Suddenly, concern flooded her. The more she thought about it, the more it seemed as though every word he spoke to her was awash with pain. Across the telepathic connection, his psychic signature fluctuated.
Without asking his permission, she teleported to him.
Celeste held her breath when she manifested in the brightly lit room where Derikles was lying down on a sofa. Both of his palms were pressed against his temples, and those dashing features were turned down in a grimace.
Sensing her sudden presence, green eyes flashed open. “Celeste?”
“Are you okay?” Mirroring his earlier question, she hesitantly took a step forward and gingerly reached her hand out to him.
“Fine.”
This close, she could feel the waves of pain that radiated from him, and just as quickly, she knew what was wrong. “Headache?”
Derikles nodded once, then immediately looked like he regretted it. “Jaeda said Isaiah got them frequently when he first became sovereign, but I don’t want to bother her again.”
Looking behind her, she strode toward the open windows and immediately pulled the drapes. After a minute, everything was blissfully dark, and he groaned in relief.
Then, she simply said, “Stay.”
Derikles abided.
Walking over to his kitchen, she rummaged through his cabinets until she found her prize, and teleported honey and ginger in to sweeten the drink. Looking at the mug in her hands, she boiled the tea with a single thought. Being a Hydro came with its perks.
Making as little noise as possible, she went back to where Derikles was attempting to rest and crouched beside him. “I made you tea with ginger. Are you up to drinking it?”
“Tea is glorified bathwater.”
Even as he said it, Derikles pushed himself up to sitting. Squinting, he eyed the steaming mug with distaste.
“You’re not getting coffee. The only thing you have in your kitchen is the ‘hard’ stuff and that’ll just make you jumpy.”
“But … coffee.”
Even as his half-closed eyes attempted to give her a sad, puppy-dog look, she shook her head. “But nothing. Bottoms up.”
Derikles scrunched his nose before his expression turned to a grimace, and Celeste lost any hint of smugness. Instead of letting him go, she walked back to his kitchen and grabbed a towel for a cold compress. Back once more in the darkened room, she shifted uneasily as she clutched the cool fabric.
When she saw Derikles had already finished the tea, she chuckled. The man had been thirsty. “Lie back and I’ll put this compress on you. It might help with the pain.”
“Dutifully playing the nurse maid to a man you just met?”
“I’m feeling charitable.”
He lowered himself back down on the couch. Gently placing the cold compress on his forehead, she hummed. For a few minutes, they simply sat in companionable silence. Her guilt at abandoning him last night continued to pit in her gut, and she finally worked up the will to speak to it.
“I’m sorry about yesterday.”
“You have nothing to be sorry about, Celeste. I was the one who kissed you.”
“And I was the one who left without an explanation.” Shame stole through her. “My best friend is laying comatose, and I found a bit of happiness with you last night. I felt guilty. Like somehow, I was betraying her and my clan.”
Removing the cold compress, emerald eyes opened to meet hers with a solemnity she well knew. “I’m perhaps the only other person who can say that I totally understand how you feel.”
“I can only imagine.” Celeste bit her lip. “But you were his second, and he …”
She stalled, and Derikles finished that train of thought. “Isaiah’s my best friend, and he left me the burden of the sovereignty.”
“Are you angry with him?”
“I was angry with him. How could I not be?” A belabored sigh, and he pushed up to his elbow. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t understand why he did it. If he had died, the clan bonds would’ve evaporated. The psychic shock might’ve killed the clan’s children.”
Derikles grew morose, the distant look in his eyes defining his next words. “At his heart, Isaiah was always the protector, the one to lay himself down on the line. By ensuring the net around their minds was still strong, he saved lives, even if he couldn’t save his own.”
Slumping back onto the carpet, Celeste wrapped her arms around her knees and thought about their sacrifice. It was unfathomable—but exactly what she would’ve expected of her own sovereign.
“To do what they did, even knowing what was coming for them?” she whispered. “I can’t imagine.”
“I must’ve been the worst burden to bear. They weren’t even able to tell their own mates.” Derikles rose to a seated position and gently reached out to where Celeste sat. “Come on, don’t sit on the floor.”
She locked eyes with him, attempting to decipher his intent, but linked her fingers with his on impulse. And instead of seating herself far away from him to maintain distance, she did just the opposite.
She curled into him, dissolving into the coffee and chocolate scent while he protectively folded her into his side. Her head settled on his shoulder, and his cheek pressed into her pink hair. They sat silently, content in the other’s presence.
“You must feel lonely,” she said softly.
“How so?”
“Being sovereign of a clan where you’d been the second. Before, you were one of them. Now, you’re at the top, in a position where your former comrades now depend on you. It’s lonely by yourself.”
Derikles didn’t immediately respond. When his fingers tightened on hers, he said, “It’s different. When I first watched that video, I didn’t know what to make of it. He’d offered me an out—find someone else who’d be willing to take on the sovereignty so I could escape it.
“Now, I’m not sure I want to. I don’t think I could hand the clan over to anyone else. I feel like no one else would care about it as much as I do.”
“I can understand that.”
He shifted to look at her. “You said it’s lonely by yourself. It sounded like you know what that feels like.”
Celeste stared at him. Revealing such a tender topic in a vulnerable time meant opening herself up. Sometimes, it was easier to hide behind humor and a corset. As she searched his gaze, she realized that he’d already invited her in by being honest about his own feelings. It gave her the courage to share her own.
“My parents were murdered by clanless Raeths when I was a few centuries old. Nina and Blair adopted me, for all intents and purposes. Or maybe I adopted them,” she chuckled. “The past couple of years have been lonely. Nina, Blair, and Remmus all found their mates, and while I’m outrageously happy for them, it feels like I’m the outsider looking in. Now that Nina’s sleeping, well, it’s only magnified that feeling.”
“Their perspectives changed—as they should. But I’ve struggled with it, too.” Derikles frowned. “Is that why you volunteered for the clanless initiative?”
“Partially,” she said. “A good friend of mine was hurt by several clanless during his upbringing, and I never want anyone to go through that again. I want to ensure that no one feels abandoned like we did. If Zia, Jeremiah, and I can make strides on that front, then I’m more than happy to lead the charge.”
Derikles nodded. “If you need help, all you have to do is ask. It’ll be a massive undertaking, and it might get my mind off the state of my sovereignty.”
“Feeling a bit blue?”
“Nah. I think I’m headed into my purple era.” At her blush, he said, “Still pretty in pink, though.”
Bumping her shoulder against his, she thought back to why she’d initially come. “Has Isaiah improved any more since you saw the initial change?”
“He’s gotten incrementally better,” he replied. “Jaeda’s hopeful, and that’s all I need to hear.”
It was the hope they all needed. As she thought through the ramifications of the energy transfer, she asked, “How does Isaiah’s mind register?”