27. Harrick
TWENTY-SEVEN
HARRICK
Once I’m released from medical evaluation, I wait in the arena lounge. Compared to most places in the Tower, the decor is muted and boring, looking almost unfinished. There’s a full kitchen on the eastern wall and an array of plush chairs and short tables throughout the remaining space. There’s a bookshelf on the western wall that I’m pretty sure is an entrance to one of the Tower’s emergency tunnels. While I count the minutes, waiting for the official verdict, I study the bookshelf. And yes, there it is: a faint seam in the wall, almost impossible to see from this distance.
“The ice helps more if you put your hands in it,” Tora says, startling me. She strides into the room, wearing the same gown from this morning. Unlike then, she’s put together now. Hair in tight coils and vibrant glitter on her eyes. She glances pointedly at the bucket of ice chips to my left.
She circles the table, knocking my feet off it, and sits on the edge. I pick up the bucket of ice, but I still don’t use it.
“I should have told you I planned to kill him,” I say. I struggle to maintain eye contact, terrified of what she’ll find there. “I thought maybe that’s what you meant earlier, but I didn’t want you to talk me out of it if I misunderstood. I just…wanted to end him.”
“I know,” she says softly. She places her hand on my knee, a trembling frown twisting her expression. “He’s alive, Harrick. Alive and going to recover.”
“Fuck!” I don’t mean to scream, but I can’t help it. Of course my brother has to be a literal cockroach. Of course I didn’t do enough to finish him. I shove to my feet, pacing the length of the room.
“On the bright side, the Committee has ruled in favor of your win,” she says. She twists to follow my movements. “The Architect seemed pleased too?—”
“Malek won’t let it happen again,” I cut her off. “Next time will be a true fight to the death, and we both know I won’t survive it.”
“We’ve found your source of power,” Tora says, finally standing. She comes in front of me, blocking my path. I could push past her, but I don’t. I’m craving her reassurance, false as it may be. “You fight for Rune. As if her life depends on it—because it does , Harrick.”
“It won’t be enough,” I say. I run my hand through my hair, weaving around her. “I used my best weapons—cheating and the element of surprise. My only chance at besting Malek was killing him. And even cheating, I failed.”
I pace the room. Once, twice, three times. Tora watches me silently, her red lips in a tight line.
“He’s going to kill her, and I won’t be able to stop him.” My voice cracks, but I’m too worked up to care.
The words worm into my brain like parasites. I’m striding the room faster now, hands jittering as I try to make a plan. Something to get Rune out. Not in a few weeks, but tomorrow or the next day. Before Malek is well enough to ruin her.
“Stop,” Tora says. She catches my arms, craning her chin to look at me. “You’re going to work yourself into a panic.”
I don’t tell her that I’ve been far past panic for days now.
“I lied, okay?” She says, worrying her lip with her teeth. “Malek isn’t planning anything against Rune.”
I reel backward, ripping out of her grasp. I’m slow to process the words, but it all snaps into place at once. My sister lied to me, forced my hand before I was ready. If I hadn’t been impulsive, I could have made a better plan. Instead, I’d been reckless—and look what it’s cost.
“Why.” Not a question, a demand. It’d be a roar if I weren’t in a state of shock.
“I was afraid you were going to lose,” she whispers. A soft pink colors her cheeks. “And in the training room, you’d gotten so furious when I mentioned her. You crushed the doorframe with your bare hand, Harrick. Did you even notice?”
I didn’t.
“That’s not possible,” I say. Then, shaking my head, I continue, “But it doesn’t matter. I acted rashly because of what you told me. Your lie won this battle, but it’s lost me the war.”
“Don’t say that. We’ll figure something out,” she says quietly. She’s squirming, a dark blush coloring her cheeks. “I’m sorry, Harrick. I was trying to help.”
I close my eyes, squeezing them until my head aches. Tora is being honest—I fully believe that—but it doesn’t change the fact that she’s completely screwed me over.
“Malek isn’t plotting against Rune?” I ask. Despite everything else, I need to hear her say it again.
“He’s not. I doubt he even knows who she is,” she says. She looks me in the eye, but I can tell she’s squirming inside. “I wanted you to hate him enough that you didn’t fear him. That you wouldn’t hesitate to kill him. I thought it was the only way you’d come out on top.”
“Well, it didn’t work,” I snap.
“You held back!” she yells, shocking us both. Her chest heaves, and her voice shakes, even as she lowers it. “You could have cut through him with those vines, and we both know it. You didn’t. You held back, Harrick. And that’s why he’s still alive.”
We stare at each other for a long moment. Me, waiting for her to take it back, to admit she’s wrong. Her, waiting for me to acknowledge that she’s right, that I could have cut through him if I tried.
“Leave!” I snarl. “Haven’t you done enough?”
“I’m not going anywhere,” she says. Her jaw is tight, her shoulders stiff. “I know you don’t believe me right now, but we’ll find a way to make this right.”
I don’t respond, don’t say another word. Tora sighs and moves to the couch, settling in beside me. She doesn’t say anything else either. She only takes my hands and submerges them in the bucket of ice.
“I forgot I left this here,” I tell Rune as I sit on her bed. I flip through the pages of Illia’s Tome , nerves spiking as I look through the chapters. I was a fool to forget this here. If anyone had searched her room, she would’ve been killed.
When Rune doesn’t respond, I glance up to find her anxiously watching me from against the wall. She’s said exactly two words since I arrived. Hello when I knocked on her door. Yes when I asked if I could come in. Now, she stands with perfect posture, hands clasped. Back to being frustratingly nervous and timid. She bites her lip as I study her, shifting under the weight of my gaze.
“Do you want to sit?” I ask. I close the book, scooting to make room for her.
She blushes like I’ve asked her to get naked, but she still joins me. I’ll take any progress I can get. She smells like the cheap soap servants use. I wish I could gift her something better, something that smells sweet yet bold, like her. But the best I can do right now is food and clean clothes. The room still carries a hint of the dinner I sent an hour ago.
“Are you okay?” she asks.
My shoulders loosen at her question, at the softness of her voice. It’s been two days since my victory against Malek, and this is the first time I’ve been alone with her. It’s well past midnight, but her lights are on. There are perks to Joran knowing my secret—so long as he doesn’t threaten exposing it.
“Somewhat,” I say truthfully. “I’m glad I won. I just…wish it ended differently.”
Rune stares at me curiously but waits for me to continue.
“I hate that he survived,” I admit. “That was my best chance of killing him, and I failed.”
I expect her to blanche or give any indication she’s offended by my cruelty. Sometimes, I forget that she’s lived a far more brutal life than I have. She may be soft-spoken and timid, but she’s undoubtedly seen terrible things.
“Enough of my brother,” I say, clearing my throat. “We need to talk.”
She nods slightly, blue eyes wide and full lips parted. I’m tempted to forgo all my confessions and use my tongue for more enjoyable things. I have to resist though—there’s no time to waste on my selfish desires.
“Two people are aware of my relationship with you,” I say, slowly, carefully. I give Rune a moment to digest that information, hating the way her skin pales. Knowing that I’ve put her life at unnecessary risk, whether I meant to or not. “Tora figured it out on her own. She saw the way I look at you. I’m going to be more careful.” I pause, waiting for some sort of reaction. When I don’t get one, I force myself to continue, “Joran had suspicions after the City of Mirrors, but I’ve all but confirmed it now that I have him guarding you.”
“Harrick,” she whispers. Her lip quivers and wetness fills her eyes, like she’s trying not to cry. When the tremble of her lip moves through her whole body, I move instinctively. I wrap my arms around her, pulling her onto my lap. She doesn’t resist, but she doesn’t stop shaking either.
“I’m sorry,” I say. “I didn’t do it to put you at risk, and if anyone were to know our secret, those two are the most trustworthy. I’d leave my life in both of their hands. But if you ever get nervous or if they say anything, you tell me. I’ll take care of it. I won’t let anyone hurt you—I promise.”
Rune doesn’t respond. A tear leaks from the corner of her eye, and then another. My heart splinters, and I’m wiping her tears before they dip into her mouth. I’ve frightened her and I hate myself for it. I hate even more that she has every right to be scared—that I can’t protect her the way she deserves.
“Rune, look at me,” I say. When she does, I gently cup the sides of her face, thumbs smoothing over her cheeks. “I will protect you with my life.”
“Don’t,” she says sharply. Her voice pitches as she stares at me. “Don’t you dare. If you die protecting me, I’ll die anyway. You realize that, right? If someone tries to kill me, and you get in their way, they will kill me as soon as you’re out of it. So don’t .”
I study the planes of her face. She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever known, and yet she’s so determined to convince me she’s worthless. Like her death would be nothing but an unfortunate casualty.
“I won’t be able to stop myself,” I say, tracing her jaw.
Rune opens her mouth to argue, but I cut her off with a kiss, cupping the back of her neck. Her hair is damp, probably from the shower that’s left her smelling like that soap. I let my hands drift down her sides, keeping my touch feather light. I settle my hands on her hips, feeling the press of her bones against my palms. She’s a little softer than she was when I met her, a little fuller. Still too thin, but healthier every day.
When she pulls back, her face is red from where my stubble scratched her. Swollen lips, a dazed but happy look in her eyes. I wonder if she can feel how turned on I am. She must, and yet, she doesn’t acknowledge it. She smiles though, the shy half-smile I’ve come to crave.
“I am yours,” I whisper, pressing my thumb to her puffy lower lip. She stills in my lap, but I don’t slow my words. “I don’t know how, but I’m going to find a way for us to be together. I promise.”
I return my eyes to hers, hoping I look calm and confident and not at all like the bundle of nerves I am. Rune’s eyebrows scrunch together and her mouth dips into a frown. My nerves coil, and I’m desperate to shove my declaration back down my throat.
Too soon. Clearly, too fucking soon.
“I love you,” she says.
I’m too stunned to respond, and she looks almost as surprised by her confession as I am. Before I have the chance to process it, let alone say it back, Rune kisses me. Her hands, small and thin and cold, cup my jaw. I’ve barely managed a shock breath when she settles over my lap, growing bolder by the second. I’ve never seen her like this, so confident and sure . The fact she’s behaving this assuredly for me has my cock straining against my slacks.
She’s kissing me so desperately our teeth keep clanking together. It’s hurried and wild, and easily the most erotic kiss I’ve ever shared. I slide her hips against me, grinding her over my rapidly hardening cock until she’s moaning into my mouth.
“Fuck,” I say, breaking away to unzip her coverall. Her lips chase me, mouth trailing open kisses down my throat. We’ve done this enough times now that she doesn’t get flustered as I peel off her sleeves. The coverall pools around her waist, baring her breasts to me. I claim one nipple before tasting the other.
“More,” she says. She links her ankles behind my back, pulling us together until our hips collide. “Please, Harrick.”
Her words have clouded every other thought in my mind. All I can think of is her. Her smell, her taste, her touch.
“How much more?” I ask, because I’m too dizzy with arousal to draw the line myself. “Tell me what you need, sweetheart.”
I hope she wants me to taste her. I’ll do it all night if she lets me, bury my face between her soft thighs until all other men are ruined. Even thinking of another man touching her has me pulling her closer, trying to imprint myself on her skin.
“Take this off,” she says. Her words are barely a whisper as she tugs at my shirt.
I don’t hesitate. I flip her onto her back and sit on my heels, undoing my buttons until I’m able to pull my shirt over my head. She stares up at me while I do, shimmying out of her coverall as I toss my shirt to the ground. Her clothes join mine on the floor a second later, and I look back to her in surprise.
She’s fully naked, her smooth pale skin on display. She looks terrified, but excited too, and her eagerness sets my heart on fire.
“Is this okay?” she asks. She still has her hands over her breasts.
“You’re so beautiful,” I say. I move her hands to either side of her face, letting my eyes drift over her naked body. I commit every curve, every soft line to memory. “You are beautiful, Rune. I am so in love with you, I don’t know what to do with myself.”
“You could have sex with me,” she says. Her voice hitches when she says it, but she doesn’t shy away from my gaze. “If you want, I mean.”
The entire world stops as she looks up at me. Her blue eyes are open and affectionate, and I’ve never been so determined to deserve someone’s love. I trail my hand down her face, over her throat and breast, stopping only when I reach her hip bone. I can imagine it all too easily, slipping into her wet heat and fucking her until we’re drunk off each other.
“It’s okay if you don’t want to,” she says. Though she blushes, she still doesn’t look away.
“I absolutely want to,” I say. As if to prove my point, I lower my hips to hers, rocking my erection against her stomach. Only my pants separate our skin, and I’ve never hated a piece of clothing more.
I lower until our bare chests touch, my eyes falling shut without permission. Her skin is unbelievably soft and smooth, and every time I thrust, she writhes impatiently beneath me. She keeps gasping, mouth parted in a way that begs me to kiss her. So I do, thrusting my tongue into her mouth, savoring the way she tastes.
“Are you sure you’re ready?” I ask her. “Don’t feel like we need to rush, okay? We’ve got time.”
“I want to,” she says. She runs her hands over the planes of my chest, drawing a shudder from deep within my bones. “But you need to tell me how to make it good for you. I’ve never—I haven’t done this before.”
I groan, leaning more of my weight against her. Her nipples brush mine every time she breathes, and her hips keep jerking toward me, seeking me.
“I was made to fuck you,” I whisper. I palm between her thighs, spreading her wetness before pushing a finger inside. She gasps, and I lean back to watch her. When I curl my finger, her hips jerk toward me. “See that? You know what to do, sweetheart. You were made to fuck me, too.”
I remove my hand, smiling as she arcs at the emptiness. She’s fallen silent, but she watches me, her eyes wide with love and lust. And when I lick her from my finger, her mouth falls open.
“You’re perfect,” I tell her. Then, “Tell me if it’s too much, and we’ll stop.”
She nods, her attention already drifting from my face to my pelvis. She pulls her lip between her teeth, and with a darting glance toward me, she reaches for the button. My self-control is hanging by a single, frayed thread, and it snaps the moment my cock springs free.
I kick out of my pants and settle between her thighs. They’re warm and smooth, and when I pull her ankles over my hips, she instantly latches around me. I lean onto my elbows, rocking my cock against the front of her pussy as I kiss her neck. She slowly relaxes, hips jolting every time I brush against her clit.
I move my hand between her thighs, running my thumb over her slit. Once I’ve spread her wetness, I slip a finger into her tight cunt and groan against her neck. She continues rocking against me, moaning when I add a second finger.
“ Harrick ,” she says. I’ve never heard someone say my name like she is now, and I’m certain no one could.
I line my cock with her entrance, watching her as she watches where we connect. I press forward, slowly, groaning as she surrounds me. She’s warm and wet and so unbearably tight I have to clench to keep from bursting immediately. I’ve thought of this too many times, dreamt of it when I was sure it would never actually happen.
Rune’s mouth parts as I rock into her, inch by agonizing inch. Once I’m halfway, her face tightens and she grabs my hips to slow me.
“That’s it,” I tell her. I slow my movements, keeping my thrusts shallow and letting her adjust. “Look how well you’re taking me, Rune. You’re fucking perfect.”
She follows my gaze, and I pinch her nipple between my fingers, twisting gently. My attention flickers between her face and the place we’re joined.The sight is almost too erotic, and it’s only the fact she looks uncomfortable that keeps me from exploding inside her.
“It feels… big ,” she moans. She’s saying it like it’s a nuisance, but my male ego swells with pride anyway. So does my cock.
“Breathe for me,” I tell her. “You’re doing so good, sweetheart.”
She does as I say and I continue moving, until finally—fucking finally—my cock is fully buried inside her.
Mine , my body demands. She is mine.
“Fuck,” I say. The word shakes, and so does my entire body. “I’m not going to last. You’re too tight. Too fucking beautiful.”
She cries out at my praise, mouth gaping in pleasure. She’s louder than she’s been before, and her legs clamp around me, like she’s determined to keep me close. I lean against her, until we’re fitted together too perfectly. We were always made to find each other, I realize. We were destined to collide again and again, until inevitably we’d find ourselves like this.
I thrust, deep and slow, circling her clit with my thumb as I kiss her neck and shoulder. When her ankles slip away and her back arcs, I realize she’s close. Only then do I pump faster and harder, filling the room with the sound of our bodies connecting. Rune’s head falls back, and her mouth opens in a silent gasp. Just as her eyes start to roll back, I slow my movements.
“Eyes on me, sweetheart,” I say. Because there’s no way I’m missing the first time she comes around my cock. “Look at me when you come. Let me see your eyes.”
She obeys immediately, giving me those blue irises. Her brown hair flows around her face, draping over her pale skin and across her breasts. I press my thumb more firmly against her clit until finally, she’s coming. Breaking apart beneath me with a breathy moan, until I’m sure I’ll never feel whole without her.
I’m less than a second behind her, coming so hard my vision goes black at the edges. I slow my thrusts until her cunt is so full of my cum, it’s leaking out of her. I keep most of my weight on my elbows, but our chests rest together, and our heartbeats align.
“Rune,” I whisper. I kiss her collarbone. Her neck. Her jaw. The side of her mouth.
I ease out of her, slowly to avoid hurting her. She groans once I’m gone, bringing her legs back together and placing her hand against her entrance. She blinks at me, giving me a sated smile, before letting her eyes drift shut.
“I love you,” she whispers.
“I love you more,” I say. I need to get something to clean us up, but I’m in no rush to move. I roll to her side and tuck her against me, my cock already stirring with her ass pressed against it. I resist the temptation. As fucking incredible as that was, Rune is—or was, I guess—a virgin. She’ll need a break before we go again.
With her lithe body tucked against mine, Rune eventually falls asleep. I try to do the same, but instead, I stare at the ceiling for what feels like hours. I think about what she’s been through, and what we’ve been through together. I think of the people in power, and the way Savoa suffers beneath them. And finally, I whisper the truth of it all into her sleeping ear.
“You’re better than all of them,” I tell her. “Every single one. You’re a queen, Rune Ealde, and someday, they’ll bow to you .”