Chapter 36
The next few days feel like the longest days of my life. Jeremy has been visiting everyday, but I can tell something is on his mind. He tells me that he is anxious over all the construction at his house, making it ready for me. But I sense there’s more to the story. I don’t have to worry anymore because I’m leaving the hospital today. I’ve showered, dressed and now I’m waiting for him to come pick me up.
Right on cue, Jeremy strides through the doors, his charming smile in place.
“Morning.”
“Good morning,” I reply, leaning forward to meet his outstretched neck and kiss him on the lips.
I missed him.
“You ready, baby?”
I nod. “I’ve been ready for hours.”
He chuckles darkly. “So I guess I don’t need to worry about you being too comfortable here.”
“Definitely not.”
“Alright then, let’s get you home.”
I like the way he says home.
I stand and sit down in the chair. I’m on a strict physio plan with how long I can stand and sit.
My bag is packed. Mom did it last night to help me. I need more clothes from home, but I’ll get the girls to bring me some when I’m settled in at Jeremy’s.
He picks up the bag and stands behind me. I expect the chair to move, but his hand slips onto my shoulder and he squeezes. I tip my head back and see him staring at me.
“I never thought I’d be here. I thought you’d hate me and tell me you never want to see me again.”
The sincerity in his voice makes my heart squeeze for him.
“I couldn”t imagine being alive and not having you. You’re not a monster. And neither is the guy who made a mistake. He lost his life, and we were lucky to come out alive. I take this as a wakeup call to remind me how much I never thought I had time for a guy or hell needed one. Until you. Now I don’t want to go a day without you.”
He stays silent, unmoving, until he finally speaks. “You’re too good for me.”
“Don’t say that. We are perfect for each other. We need each other for us to be one.”
“I need you. The last week has been horrendous. And I’m ready to put that chapter behind me.”
“Let’s go home. I want to sit on your ridiculously comfortable sofa and watch a movie with you holding me.”
“Is that right?”
“Yeah. Unless you have other plans.”
“The only plan I have on my calendar is you.”
“I promise you. You will get sick of me. You’ll need to work eventually.”
“I’ll worry about that when you’re back at work. For now, I’m at your beck and call.”
He pushes the wheelchair to the elevators as we pass the reception. I wave at the nurses at the desk. I’ll miss their warm and friendly smiles, but I won”t miss this place. I want to go where Jeremy is.
“That could be dangerous.”
His mouth drops and his breath tickles the shell of my ear. “Don’t tempt me.”
“It’s not tempting. It’s a promise.”
“You need to be careful.”
“There’s plenty we can do where I won”t be standing, or it won”t hurt my hips. Do you need me to ask the doctor?”
“No.” He grunts, and I can imagine how uncomfortable he is. I bite my lip hiding my smile.
We take the elevator down to his private car. His driver steps out.
“You didn’t want to drive?”
“I’m not ready to drive you yet.”
“Did you buy a new fancy car?”
“By fancy you mean the world’s safest car they offer right now? Then yes. I bought a new car.”
I don’t push him. Understanding driving wouldn’t be easy anymore. Hell, right now I”m queasy being a passenger again.
I slip into the back seat without saying a word. My hands settle in my lap after I buckle up. Jeremy joins me on the other side. He reaches for my hand the moment he sits inside. Even if he doesn’t know I’m panicky, I’m grateful he feels the need to touch me because as soon as the car moves my heart is in my throat and it doesn’t calm until the moment we pull up at Jeremy’s.
I wonder when I’ll get used to a car again. Or will this be my new normal?
I truly hope not…
Jeremy opens my door and walks me into his personal elevator. Here I was thinking how ridiculous a personal elevator was but now I’m grateful for it. He guides me into the house, and I’m immediately overwhelmed by all the red roses throughout the house. Every room is littered with them.
“Wow. You really are excited to have me here.”
“You have no idea.”
“I think the amount of red roses in your house tells me you”re obsessed.”
“Damn straight, baby.”
“Good. Because I’m so obsessed with you too. But I think you bought the whole city’s supply of red roses.”
“I definitely cleaned out a few florists.”
He pauses next to his sofa and as soon as I can I stand, I kiss him. This time I hold him so close and don’t stop kissing him until I need air.
“Come sit, we have all night for that.”
A grumble leaves me at his all-night comment.
I’ve missed him.
“Right now I need to hold you in my arms alone here.”
“I can do that,” I say with a smile.
“The physio is set to come after lunch today.”
“Thanks,” I say. I’m not looking forward to the session, but I know every session will bring me closer to healing.
We take a seat on the sofa.
He sits with his legs apart and he drags my body between his. I recline into his body, welcoming his arm that snakes around my waist pulling me closer.
“What did you want to watch?” he asks as we flick through the channels.
I don’t have the heart to tell him I’m too tired. So I say, “Anything.”
He kisses the top of my head. The love and warmth he surrounds me with makes it hard to resist sleep. Eventually my eyes flutter and my heavy lids close.
A few hours later, I stretch, and a stupidly happy smile spreads across my face as I remember he’s here with me.
“Did you nap too?”
“You made it impossible not to.”
“Oh baby, are you sad?”
“No, I”ve barely slept in a week, so I enjoyed your body wrapped in mine.”
I smile. Knowing exactly what he means, because I too have missed him, and I haven’t been awake to see him in a hospital bed looking like death.
I’m glad I wasn’t able to see the state I was in. Seeing myself in the mirror the first time I showered was enough.
And a part of me worries he won’t look at me the way he used to when he sees the bruising, scars and damage from the accident.
I want him to be rough with me, the first time we do it again. I don’t want pity eyes; I want the loving eyes of the man who wants to eat me alive, making every whimper and moan sound like ecstasy to him. Yeah, I need that man. This tender one is nice, and I crave this part of him, but when we’re together, I don’t want nice.
“What are you thinking about?”
I tilt my head back to look into his eyes. The little wrinkle between his brows lets me know that he’s aware I’ve been quietly thinking the last few minutes.
“How happy I am to be back in your arms.” It’s a half-truth. I just kept the dirty memories out of it. But, of course, he picks up on my body language.
“What?”
“So you’re not ready for more?” I say, with a smile.
“What do you mean?”
“I want you, Remy.”
“You need to rest.”
“I’m fine, please.”
“I’ve missed you, Star. But we can wait.”
I grab his thigh in a firm squeeze. “No! I need you.”
His brow lifts and his eyes darken seductively.
“And you’re recovered enough to have your legs spread wide.”
His dirty mouth leaves me speechless. But I recover quickly.
“You worry about yourself. Leave my legs to me.”
He tsks. “You know I can’t do that.” His finger draws slowly up and down my arm in a shivering trance. “I care about every single part of you.”
The doorbell rings.
I groan, closing my eyes with frustration. “Who’s that?”
“A surprise.”
He strides to the door like a man on a mission.
“Hi, Mr. and Mrs. Lee, come on in.”
“Mom? Dad?” I say, sitting myself forward on the sofa before getting myself into the wheelchair.
I wheel myself closer to them. They come inside and I smile wide because this is the best surprise.
What are they doing here?
“I organized dinner for us. I wanted to celebrate you being home and I thought your parents should see where you live.”
My head turns to Jeremy. I’m too bewildered to speak.
If I thought I loved him before, I just fell for him all over again.