43. Kali
Chapter 43
Kali
I grabbed Rowan’s arm, yanking hard enough that he flew off his feet, and landed on his back next to me. Keeva’s scream was filled with panic, but she didn’t touch me as I kept an inescapable hold on his throat. He choked out short breaths as I glanced to the side. Rya and a couple other Shadows were holding her back as she fought against them.
“Feed,” Rya urged gruffly.
“No,” Keeva shrieked. “Don’t touch him. I swear Kali?—”
I turned my attention back on Rowan, ignoring how my body was screaming in agony from my movements. He was struggling weakly in my hold, his injuries so bad that it wasn’t difficult to keep him in place. Fear flooded his eyes when I met his gaze, using all my strength to entrance him.
“What do you plan to do with me if I don’t obey you?” I asked.
His face fell blank. “Put you back in that chair.”
“Why?”
“So we can use your blood.”
I tilted my head. “Blood? Amaros is not a threat anymore. Why would you need my blood?”
“For other vampires, and for Shadows who don’t fall in line.”
“Get off,” Keeva snarled, anger laced in her voice. “You all are supposed to listen to me.”
“And my sister?” I asked quietly, holding his gaze. “Are you in love with Keeva?”
He clenched his teeth, sweat appearing on his forehead. He was fighting this question and had more control over his mind than I thought. I sucked in a deep breath, pouring all my energy into gaining back control.
“Answer me,” I demanded, squeezing his throat.
“No,” he choked out.
“You don’t love her?”
“No.”
“Are you using her?”
“Yes,” he answered hoarsely.
That was the only answer I needed. Letting my fangs slide down, I lowered my head and tore into his throat. He screamed and thrashed, his hits doing nothing as I sucked and sucked. His blood soothed my pain and warmed my chest. Already, I could feel it bringing my energy back. My strength. I didn’t stop, ignoring Keeva’s threats and commands.
Listening carefully to his heartbeat, I continued to drink as it slowly changed rhythm until it was nearly nonexistent. Pulling away, I licked my lips, finally feeling sated. Rowan didn’t move a muscle, but his eyes were open, and he was glaring at me with as much hatred as he could muster.
“You don’t get to die that easily,” I murmured, vengeance smothering my voice. “Not after what you did to me. What you did to Zan.” I locked eyes with him again. “Tell me. Do you plan on killing Zan?”
He didn’t even have the energy to speak, so he only nodded.
“Would you torture me again if I don’t listen?”
He nodded again.
“Leave him alone,” Keeva screamed, her voice higher than normal.
“Didn’t you hear him?” I asked, not looking away from him. “He doesn’t love you.”
“Don’t kill him.”
I bit my tongue, her statement sounding identical to when I begged her for Zan’s life. But this was different. Rowan was a monster even if he was just a man. He wanted power. The control. He would never give it up. Keeva would create his army of Shadows. Life for the humans and Shadows would never be peaceful.
“I’m sorry,” I breathed out, raising my eyes to look at her. “I can’t let him live.”
“No—”
She screamed when I pressed my nails into Rowan’s stomach, breaking his skin. He jerked slightly, too weak to try to push me away. I pressed harder until the little blood he did have left began dribbling out.
“This is for Keeva,” I hissed vehemently. “You used her. For me. For Zan. For all the Shadows PARA killed. For the humans who cower because of your laws. It all changes now.”
His mouth opened in a silent scream as I dragged my fingers up his stomach, ripping his skin open even more. He writhed, agony covering his face. Keeva was still screaming, but it was turning into cries. I reached his chest, his blood covering my fingers as I pressed harder, making sure I didn’t kill him. He would die from this injury. But not right away.
I wiped his blood on his shirt and stood up, my heart pounding furiously. I should feel guilty. For killing a human. But I didn’t. He wasn’t a good person, and I couldn’t bring myself to care. Not even when I met Keeva’s tear-stained face.
Before I could say a word, something nefarious rippled through me. I sucked in a ragged breath when my chest went tight. But this panic wasn’t mine. My eyes snapped to the door. Zan . He was in trouble. It was exactly how I felt when Amaros had taken him. I was halfway to the exit before Keeva stopped me.
“You’re not going anywhere,” she growled. “I can have PARA in here in an instant.”
I wasn’t sure how she’d be able to pull that off, but I didn’t hear any bluff in her voice. I clenched my hands, my pulse thrashing.
“Rya,” I finally said stiffly. “Go outside with some others. Help Zan. Please.”
She frowned. “I’m not leaving you alone?—”
“I’ll be fine,” I promised, trying to keep the impatience out of my voice. “She can’t kill me. We’re connected. One can’t live without the other.”
Rya didn’t move, indecision sprawled across her features. Keeva looked at her and the other Shadows near her, straightening her spine.
“Stay here,” she ordered. “With us.”
“Go,” I nearly screamed. “Please. I promise, I’ll be okay.”
With a curse, Rya began running, pushing the door open and disappearing outside. About thirty others followed, and I watched them go, hoping they could help Zan before it was too late. Keeva’s eyes landed on Rowan, and she let out a quiet sob as she fell on the floor next to him.
When she bit into her wrist, I stiffened. How could I forget that she could heal?
“No,” I yelled, sprinting the few steps and crashing into her.
“Let me heal him,” she snapped as we rolled across the tile floor. “His heart is barely beating.”
“He doesn’t deserve to live,” I huffed out, blocking her hit when she threw her fist at my face. “You heard him. Why are you still fighting this?”
“I don’t care,” she growled. “You made him say that. He loves me.”
“He was entranced. He had to tell the truth.”
I caught her ankle when she tried moving for him again. With a hard yank, I pulled her back to the floor. She let out a shriek of fury, diving at me. The Shadows were circling us, but none of them intervened as we exchanged blows. Our strength was evenly matched since I’d fed, and I refused to let her heal Rowan. I should have just killed him.
“Keeva, listen to me,” I grunted out when her next punch cracked one of my ribs. “PARA doesn’t have to be in charge. You and I—we can make this world how it should be. Freedom. Peace. We can make sure that happens. We were born to do this. You believe what we read, don’t you?”
“I believe that Rowan has taken care of me my entire life.” She swung at me again, and I rolled out of the way. “He knows best. PARA knows best. They always will.”
Fuck. Panic swallowed me. Had they gotten into her head that much? What if she never trusted me? How could we both survive in this world?
She grabbed me by the throat, lifting me from the floor before I broke her hold by slamming my fist down onto her elbow. She let out a howl when her bone cracked.
“Stop fighting me,” I pleaded, my voice rough. “I don’t want to hurt you. You’re the only blood I have in this life. I want us to be a family. Think clearly, Keeva. Please.”
“Rowan is my family,” she screeched, ramming into me and slamming me against the wall. “Not you. You have my face, but you’re nothing but darkness. Wrapped in evil. You want Rowan to suffer? You kill PARA members. Side with vampires and Kanes. You will never be my family. I gave you a chance, and you fucking ruined it.”
Her next hit had me nearly seeing stars, but I didn’t even try to block it. My heart was aching. Shattering. She was my sister. My twin. All I’d wanted was to get close to her. But I could see it wasn’t an option. She was far too entangled with PARA. Her mind so closed off that she would never see reason.
“I am the light,” she said between heavy breaths. “Maybe the dark should die with you.”
My eyes snapped to hers. “I thought we couldn’t survive without each other.”
“Maybe it’s wrong. Because I don’t want to live in a world that has you in it.”
I ducked when she swung again, her words ripping me apart. I didn’t want to hurt her. But I also wasn’t about to let her kill me. She kicked at me, her foot making contact with my chest so hard that I staggered back into the wall. I braced myself when she lunged at me, and I wrapped my arms around her waist, taking her back to the floor.
“Don’t do this,” I warned, emotion thick in my voice. “Don’t make me do this.”
“I tried. It’s clear you’ll never change.”
The Shadows were shifting uneasily all around us, but they didn’t know what to do. Good. They didn’t need to be involved in this.
I rolled on top of her, grabbing her wrist before she could hit me again. Adrenaline and dread were flowing through my veins as I looked down at her.
“Keeva, listen to me,” I ground out when she attempted to shove me off. “We can change this world. Without PARA.”
“No,” she bit out. “You’re too far gone.”
The air left my lungs when she wedged her knee between us and knocked me away. I scrambled up, confusion hitting me when she jumped to her feet and raced to the back wall. Her palm slammed on a small button, and immediately an alarm began blaring.
“PARA still outnumbers you,” she shouted. “You can’t win this, Kali.”
The alarm was deafening, and my heart dropped. It was the same exact sound when Zan and I escaped from Project Hope. I was positive PARA soldiers would be storming in here any moment. Before I could make another move, Keeva rushed at me, her speed so fast that I barely managed to dodge out of the way. She snagged my arm, but I yanked away before grabbing her shoulders and slamming her into the wall.
She let out a wild laugh, her eyes gleaming in triumph. “What are we doing? Just going to keep fighting when we can’t kill each other? Give up, Kali.”
Her eyes bore into mine, and my fingers dug into her shoulders as I kept her against the wall. Would we forever be trapped in this circle if we couldn’t agree? I had seconds before PARA soldiers appeared, and I wasn’t sure I’d be able to fight them all.
“I can’t do this anymore,” I breathed out, a lump growing in my throat. “I don’t think we’ll ever be on the same side.”
“We can be if you choose the light,” she murmured softly.
“Maybe I am the light.”
She scowled. “You’re not.”
The door behind us slammed open, and heavy footsteps filled the air. The soldiers clashed with the Shadows, and shouts mixed with gunshots. Depending on how many there were, I maybe had moments before they got to me. A smug look crossed Keeva’s face.
“You’re going to regret what you did to Rowan,” she hissed.
My heart squeezed when I realized what I was about to do. “No, I won’t.”
I let go of one of her shoulders, and spun her around, smashing her chest against the wall. She shoved against me as I grabbed her arm, wrenching it up to help keep her immobile. She let out a pained snarl, and I leaned against her, keeping her in place.
“In our mother’s note, she told me that I have the choice of being the light or the dark,” I whispered in her ear. “I choose to be the light and the dark.”
I had no idea if this would even work. But something inside me was urging me to do it. That it was the right choice.
My fangs slid down, and I bit into the side of her throat, swallowing as fast as I could. Keeva cried out in surprise, bucking against me.
“What the hell are you doing?” she shrieked.
I didn’t answer, sucking harder. Her blood was different from any human’s. It wasn’t quenching my thirst. But as it spread through my body, a new sensation swept over me. Something I couldn’t decipher. Whatever it was, I felt like I was floating in a sea of tranquility. Of peace.
Keeva’s screams grew quieter, her fight slowly leaving her as I drained her blood. Guilt had my heart beating unevenly. If she did this to me, I’d never forgive her.
“Stop,” someone ordered from behind me.
My body jerked when a bullet hit me near my spine. Pain flared up my side when I was shot again, but I kept sucking her blood. If this didn’t work, I was as good as dead. And so was Zan. That thought only had me more determined to finish.
“Get her off me,” Keeva choked out, her voice weak.
Hands grasped my shoulders, but their human strength was nothing. I planted my feet, not moving a muscle. A moment later, the guy behind me let out a yell and I heard teeth tear into flesh when a Shadow attacked him.
I froze when her blood began tasting different. I swallowed one more time before pulling back to stare at the wound. I was doing this for one reason, and it wasn’t to kill her. Even after her betrayal, I didn’t want her dead. Maybe now, there was a chance that we could exist together.
My stomach flipped at the sight, and I stumbled back a few steps still in disbelief at what I did. Keeva whipped around, nearly falling over before she caught her balance.
“What did you do?” she shrieked. “Why do I feel so…”
She trailed off, wiping her neck where she was still bleeding.
“I can do both. Be the light and the dark,” I murmured. “I can feel it. Your power inside me.”
Her hand shook as she raised it, and her eyes widened as she stared at the blood on her hand.
Her bright, red blood.
She wasn’t a Shadow anymore. Because I’d just taken it. I had the power to create and destroy. I flexed my fingers, feeling her blood rush through me.
“No,” she breathed out before her rage filled her voice. “No!”
With a scream, she leaped at me, but with her human strength, it was simple to move out of the way before she could reach me. Shots echoed around the room, and I grunted when I was hit in the shoulder, and then in the thigh. Pain simmered through me as my eyes darted around, and I noticed the Shadows were all staring at me. There were a couple PARA members still standing, but the one who just shot me was already on the ground with a broken neck.
But then a back door slammed open, and more PARA soldiers flooded through with their weapons raised.
“You think you’ve won?” Keeva asked in a trembling voice. “They’ll make sure you don’t leave. Ever.”