1
BLOOM
W hy is nothing good on cable TV when there are so many channels?
Heaving a sigh, I dropped the remote onto my stomach and linked my fingers. The hospital staff had been so grateful for me saving their lives—no matter how often I told them that hadn’t been my intention—that they upgraded me to a private room with a flat-screen TV and an absurd number of channels.
Yet I couldn’t settle on any program to watch. I was tired of channel hopping.
On the TV, an action flick exploded across the screen in a flurry of bullets. People scampered for cover. The deafening intensity should have grabbed my attention, but my gaze kept drifting to the turquoise-trimmed clock on the wall.
He’s late. Logan’s never late.
Something’s wrong. I just know it.
I grabbed my cell phone from the bedside table laden with a bouquet, get-well-soon cards, Ferrero Rafaello almond coconut chocolate—my new obsession—a bottle of water, and puzzle and activity books. No missed calls. No text messages. He should have been here at least forty-five minutes ago.
I punched in Logan’s number and put it on speaker.
“You’ve reached the voice mail of—”
“Where the hell are you, Logan?” I ended the call and sank back against the pillows. Shit, that was too hard. Wincing, I gently touched the bandage over the bullet wound on my chest.
It wasn’t time yet for my next dose of medicine, but the dull throb spiked. The doctor had lowered my dosage that morning, saying my body was healing well and I needed to wean off the painkillers. If the pain became unbearable, I should tell a nurse, but I didn’t want them to increase my dosage again. The medications left me loopy, and I sometimes barely remembered visitors.
I can’t wait to go home.
The best part of being stuck in the hospital was the attention from Logan, who fussed over me every time he visited. He would feed me, adjust my pillows and blankets, read to me, and even pester the nurses about my care. He was never satisfied they were doing enough for me and insisted on overseeing every detail of my recovery, despite my protests.
Nothing was sexier than Logan fussing, sheer determination on his face. Even when he glared at me in anger after I joked I was glad I got shot so he could take care of me—it was totally worth it.
A knock on the door jolted me from my thoughts.
Logan’s here!
The door opened, and Nurse Sven Riley entered. My face fell. I clutched the sheets in my hands and squeezed.
“Isn’t he here yet?” I blurted out. Maybe Logan was already at the hospital, meeting with the CEO. Since the hostage situation, his superiors had been giving him a hard time and even forced him to take a leave of absence.
As soon as I am back on my feet, they’ll have to give him his job back! I’ll make sure of it.
Sven glanced up from the tablet in his hand, eyebrows knitted. “Excuse me?”
“Logan! Dr. Collier. Where is he?”
He gave a tiny shake of his head. “I have no idea. I haven’t seen him today. If he were here, we’d know. He’d have already criticized a million things we’ve done wrong in caring for you.”
I growled, drawing a sharp breath through clenched teeth as the pain throbbed in my chest. Despite the agony, I shoved myself into a sitting position. “I’m not getting through to him on his cell phone. Don’t you have any way to reach him?”
“Like what?” Sven sighed. “I’m sure Dr. Collier is fine, and you’re worrying for nothing. You’re the one we should be worried about. Haven’t you realized that you’ve been shot?” He clicked his tongue and shook his head. “I swear you’re the first patient who doesn’t seem to understand they almost…”
“That I what? You can say it.”
“Never mind. Dr. Collier has forbidden us to mention it.”
I beamed a smile. “That I almost died? Silly. He’s very protective of me. Isn’t that a good thing?”
“Sure, it’s super. Just not for the rest of us who have to be told how to do our job as if we haven’t been doing this for years.”
“I know, right? How awesome is that? Jamie says he doesn’t get this way with anyone else. That I’m special.”
My relationship with the nurse had changed. We’d had tiffs in the past, and he always had his nose turned up whenever I was around. But after two weeks of being around each other, we had forged an unspoken truce. I didn’t give him sass, and he kept his commentary to himself—mostly.
“The rest of us can’t speak to the good nature of the man except that he’s one of the most brilliant minds we’ve ever worked with.” He removed his stethoscope from his neck. “But it’s clear as day how he feels about you. Look at how protective he’s been.”
For a fleeting second, a wistful expression crossed his face, but it was gone just as quickly. “Let’s check you out.”
He listened to my heartbeat, checked my bandage, then took my pulse. When he was done, he pulled the sheets back into place. “No fever and vitals are stable. You’re making excellent progress. Before you know it, you’ll be home.”
“Trying to get rid of me?”
A grin spread across his face. “Always. You’re a pain in the ass.”
“Careful, or I’ll tattle.”
He rolled his eyes. “At least do it after my shift ends. I can’t take another lecture from Dr. Collier today. I have enough on my plate as it is.”
He furrowed his brows, the stress lines around his mouth getting more pronounced than usual. Logan always chided me to be nicer to the staff due to their highly stressful job. Maybe I hadn’t been fair to them.
“I won’t say anything,” I said.
“Maybe you’re not so heartless after all.”
“Though I almost was.”
He chuckled. “You actually have a sense of humor. Dark, but it’s there. Weird obsession with the doctor aside, you might not be too bad. What do you see in him anyway? A beautiful guy like you could have men throwing money at your feet.”
I frowned. “What would I need money for? He makes me feel…” Safe . I cleared my throat, biting back what I almost admitted to the nurse, who was staring back at me, too invested in an actual answer. “He fucks like a god.”
Color rushed into his face. “Well, umm, why don’t I have your lunch brought up to you? I’ll be back to give you your medication. The pain isn’t unbearable, is it?”
It was just about, but I shook my head. “I’ll manage.”
The door opened, and I craned my neck to see who my visitor was. What the hell was he doing here? Dr. Simms stepped inside and nodded an acknowledgment to Sven, who hurried from the room.
“What are you doing here?” I barked.
Dr. Simms closed the door behind him. “Bloom, this insolence of yours needs to stop. Like it or not—”
“I don’t. After you testified against Logan, I told you I didn’t want to see you ever again.”
“And I’ve stayed away to give you time to cool off. But the fact remains that I am your psychiatrist, and on top of what you’ve already endured, you were shot. That must have been a terrifying experience for you. I’m here to talk to you about it.”
“What good is talking to you? I already know what you’re going to say anyway.”
He fixed his glasses on his nose, then folded his arms across his chest. “What exactly do you think I’m going to say?”
“That—that Logan’s not right for me, and that me doing what I had to protect him makes me some kind of headcase.”
“Bloom, I’d never use words like that to describe you.” He pulled out a chair and lowered himself into it with the grace of a panther. “Believe it or not, I’m only worried about your welfare. Now, you and I know you still have a lot of time left in therapy. Don’t push me away.”
“I’ll find someone else.”
“You mustn’t!” He sprang to his feet, his normally composed countenance shattered. “You’ve been through a traumatic incident, Bloom. It’s critical to maintain continuity in therapy, not introduce another upheaval.”
“I’ll manage.” Just as I had told Sven regarding the pain. I wanted to be in control again.
“What if we take the topic of Dr. Collier off the table and discuss the other areas of your life? I’m willing to make that compromise just to see you well.”
“What good is a psychiatrist to me if I can’t talk about the man I love?”
Dr. Simms tightened his hands into fists at his side. “You don’t love him,” he said haltingly. “You think you do, but you don’t. That’s your obsession talking.”
“Get the fuck out!”
“You know I’m right, Bloom, and that’s why you want to avoid me. Because I force you to face the truth that you’re in denial about. You’re lost, and I’m trying to help you find your way. Sooner or later, Dr. Collier will fail you. When he does, remember that I will always extend myself to help you. All I want is to do my job and to do it well.”
My chest heaved, and my labored breathing filled the room. “I said I don’t fucking need you. Why do you insist on prying into my life?”
“Because I care about my patients, Bloom,” he said earnestly. “You came to me, a unique young man without a last name—a young man without an identity, questioning his place in this world. It’s my job to help you find out who you are.”
“I know who I am.”
“Dr. Collier’s lover is not an appropriate answer. Think about it, and if that’s all you can come up with, you know I’m right. You need me even more than you need him.”
He was wrong. Being Logan’s lover was enough. It was everything. That was my purpose, and whenever I was with Logan, I felt fulfilled. Plus, I was still a Blood Hound. I didn’t need Dr. Simms. Logan loved me just the way I was.
Where is he?
Left alone once more, I called Logan two more times but got no response. Maybe I should go and find him myself. I pulled back the sheet and swung my legs over the side of the bed, grimacing as a sharp pain shot through my chest.
The door opened, and Sven entered ahead of a young woman in a white uniform wheeling in a tray of food.
“What the hell are you doing?” He rushed over to the bed and took me by the shoulders. “You’re not supposed to stand without assistance.”
“I need to find Logan.”
“You won’t even make it out the door without falling flat on your face. Now lie back down.”
“You don’t understand. He said he would be here at nine. It’s almost noon. Something is wrong.”
“I doubt it, and even if it is, what can you do to help? You’re recovering from surgery. Now for god’s sake, stop being difficult and—”
“I’ll yank the needles out if you don’t release me.” Why the hell was I so weak? I couldn’t even push him to release me.
“Don’t make me order you to be strapped down, Bloom. I will do it if that’s what it takes to—”
“What’s going on here?”
Logan filled the doorway, his short hair messy as though the wind had been caressing the strands.
His casual jeans and a black tweed trench coat over a dark blue pullover made my breath hitch. My heart punched against my ribs, and I bit my bottom lip, unable to take my eyes off him.
Mine.
Forever mine.