45
LOGAN
T he waiting area was a mix of sterile walls and muted chaos. People sat in rigid chairs arranged in neat rows, their expressions ranging from nervous anticipation to quiet resignation. The air smelled faintly of sweat and disinfectant. I sat stiffly, gripping my knees, as a clock on the wall ticked. Each second stretched into eternity.
I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, tapping my foot on the floor. A guard behind the counter glanced at me, his bored expression holding no interest. He barked a name—someone else’s—and a man shuffled forward to meet whoever he’d come for. I stared after him, my stomach twisting.
Maybe I shouldn’t have come. I should’ve stayed far away, kept the past buried where it belonged.
But I was already here…
“Logan Collier,” the guard finally called. My name echoed in the hollow room, louder than I’d expected. Heads turned, some curious, others indifferent. I stood and followed the guard through the heavy steel door that led to the visitation area.
The room wasn’t much better. The gray walls were as lifeless as I assumed the people within them were. I sat on one of the four bolted-down chairs around the table in the center of the room, my palms sweaty against my thighs. Time dragged. I scanned the room, taking in every detail—the scuff marks on the floor, the faint scratch marks on the table’s edge, the cracked plaster on the far wall. My thoughts swirled with every reason why I shouldn’t have come. What would I even say? What would he say? It’d been too damn long. I shouldn’t have let Joel talk me into seeing my father.
The door creaked open, and I froze.
When my father walked in, my breath hitched. He looked… smaller. Not physically—he was still tall, still carried a shadow of the broad-shouldered man I remembered—but his presence had diminished. His once-commanding gait was replaced by the shuffle of prison-issued shoes. His face, lined and hollowed, betrayed the weight of years spent behind bars. His dark hair was streaked with gray, and his eyes, once sharp and calculating, were dulled by time.
He stopped a few feet from the table, his gaze meeting mine. I’d expected anger, but what I saw stunned me: sadness, regret, and something else I couldn’t name. It rooted me in place, choking off any words I might’ve had.
“Keegan,” he whispered.
My name hung in the air, heavy and sharp. I leaned back, tightening my jaw. “I go by Logan now, and before you get any wild ideas, I’m not here to make amends,” I said, each word deliberate, cutting. “And I’m not asking for your forgiveness. I don’t regret what I did back then.”
He nodded slowly, pressing his lips into a thin line, and sat across from me. “I’ve accepted that,” he said quietly. “I’m so fucking happy to see you after all these years.”
I let out a bitter laugh. “Out of curiosity, what do you think you would achieve by pestering me? Emil’s capable of leading the family. Why do you insist on wreaking havoc in my life? Haven’t you done enough?”
“I wanted to see my son.” He raised his chin, his jaw jutted proudly, and there it was—the man I’d grown up with. “Like you, I’m not here to tell you I’m sorry for what I did. I did what I had to for the family—for you—and that means we didn’t always agree, but you’re still my son. Did you honestly think I tried to kill you?”
“Why wouldn’t I?”
“I am your father, Keegan, and nothing can change that. Not even your new surname. I don’t like what you did, but…it took balls.”
Was that admiration in his tone?
“All this could’ve been avoided if you’d treated us equally,” I said, my voice rising. “If you hadn’t played favorites, if you’d given Emil or anyone else a chance. I never wanted that life, yet you insisted—”
“You’re right. But we lost your brother. I only have you and Emil left. Is it so farfetched I would want to repair the damage?”
“And if it’s not repairable?”
“At least I would have tried.” Silence stretched between us again, the tension easing slightly. Then he spoke, his tone softer. “I heard you’re getting married.”
I sucked in a deep breath. “I am.”
“To a man.”
I doubled my fists. “It’s none of your business who I marry.”
Pop smiled. “You’re hotheaded. You’re a lot like me, more than you’d want to admit. But you also got your mother’s self-control. What is he like?”
“Excuse me?” I didn’t know how else to respond. How did someone describe Bloom? Words weren’t enough. Bloom was a person you had to experience to understand him.
“Joel says he’s quite a looker.”
“He is.”
“But the most interesting part is that he is an enforcer of a notorious biker gang.”
I sat up straight, heat radiating over my face.
He’s going to call me a hypocrite. I left the Mafia only to end up with a notorious gang.
“They’re nothing like the Mafia. They’re good people.”
“I’m not questioning your choices, Keegan. From what Joel tells me, you’ve made an excellent choice.”
I folded my arms, rocking back in the chair. “Did you hire Joel by chance, like he believes?”
“What do you think?”
I’d been right all along. Joel working for my father was indeed too much of a coincidence.
“I’m going to miss working with him,” Pop said. “He’s smart, that one.”
“Miss him?”
“Yes, he’s decided after he finishes his contract with us, he’s moving back to Ohio.”
“Oh.” Joel had mentioned returning to Smoky Vale, but I hadn’t expected it to be so soon. Not when he was at the height of his legal career. He stood to make a name for himself in New York more than a small town in Ohio.
I shook my head. “There’s something else you should know about. I heard about your… errm, relationship behind bars.”
His face reddened, and he shifted in his seat. “What about it?”
At least he wasn’t pretending or defending himself that he had no option in prison. “He’s not who he claims to be. He was working with Uncle Mickey, and he had orders to kill you.”
“I know.”
I blinked. “You do?”
“He confessed to me,” he said with a sigh. “Told me everything.”
“And you didn’t—”
“We… sorta fell in love,” he admitted, his cheeks darkening further.
I stared at him. “You… what?”
“It’s not something I planned, Keegan. It just… happened. One second he was trying to shank me, and the next…he gets me like no one else ever did.”
“I thought you’d deny it.”
“Why? A lot of time has passed, Keegan. People change.”
But did he, though? Sure, it was convenient for him to end up fucking a man. He was in prison. If he somehow got released, how long would that last?
I shook my head. “I think I should go. This has been a lot to process.”
He reached a hand out, seemed to think twice about it, and pulled back. “Will you visit again?”
I hesitated, the weight of his question pressing on me. “I’m not sure.”
He nodded slowly. “Take care of yourself, son, and congrats on your wedding.”
When I stepped into the cold air again, I drew in a deep breath, trying to shake off the encounter. It felt like a chapter closing, but not entirely. Maybe someday I’d find the courage to open it again. But not today. Not for a while.
Back at the hotel, I let myself into the room and looked around. I’d left Bloom behind when I had gone to meet Pop because he’d slept fitfully last night. He’d had one of those nightmares caused by Dr. Simms. Even though the man was gone, he’d left a dark stain on Bloom’s mind. According to Saint’s mother, it would take time and even more therapy for Bloom to overcome this new trauma that had been forced on him—trauma that never even happened.
Bloom wasn’t in the room. My heart skipped a beat. The bed was rumpled, the comforter lying on the floor, and the door to the balcony was ajar. I crossed the room quietly and pushed the door open enough to step outside. An icy breeze hit me.
And then I saw him.
Bloom stood with his back to me, wearing nothing but a short silk robe, the hem swaying halfway up his thighs, showing off his long, tattooed legs. His blond hair rippled down his back in damp waves, and I couldn’t help but smile. I secretly loved that he’d gone back to being blond. It suited him, this lighter, softer look.
I have to tell him what Dr. Simms did.
It’ll shatter him.
I took a step closer, and the soft sound of my footfall must have drawn his attention. He turned, and my breath caught.
God, he’s stunning. Even with the dark circles under his eyes.
His face was bare, void of makeup, every sharp angle and delicate line of his features on full display. Water droplets still clung to his neck, glistening in the sharp light, and the robe was loosely tied around his waist, teasing glimpses of skin beneath it. His gaze met mine, and a slow, knowing smile spread across his lips, stealing the words I hadn’t yet found.
“You’re back,” he said, his voice soft, a little husky. “How was it?”
I leaned against the balcony rail, unable to stop myself from taking him in, from memorizing every detail of this moment. “Okay,” I replied, my voice rasping.
“Want to talk about it?” He tilted his head.
I shook my head, stepping closer to him, closing the distance between us. “Maybe later. How are you? Did you get any sleep while I was gone?”
“Some.” He walked into my arms, raising his hand to slip his fingers through my hair. “Right now, do you know what I want?”
He raised his head, but I inched back my head, breathing deeply. “Are you…sure?”
We hadn’t had sex since the whole incident, and I hadn’t been able to tell if it was due to our worry about Max or his restlessness from what Dr. Simms had tried to do to him—and somewhat succeeded.
My gaze dropped to his lips, and my heartbeat quickened. I wanted him fiercely, but I didn’t want to make anything worse for him.
“Yes, I’m sure.”
Bloom pushed my head down and slammed our lips together. He wound his arms around my neck as he kissed me back, our lips moving in sync and his moans pouring into my mouth.
I brushed my fingers over his jaw, then cupped the back of his neck and pulled him closer. He laced his fingers through my hair and leaned against me as we deepened our kiss. I slipped a hand beneath his robe, touching his cold, bare skin. His ass filled my palm, and I groaned.
When we finally broke apart, gasping for air, I rested my forehead against his.
“You’re my everything,” I whispered. “You know that, right?”
Bloom’s smile was soft, his cheeks flushed. “Show me,” he said, his voice a breathy challenge.
I didn’t need to be told twice. My fingers moved to the knot of his robe, tugging it loose. The silk parted easily, slipping from his shoulders and pooling at his feet. I stepped back just enough to take him in, my gaze sweeping over every inch of him. His pale skin, his beautiful ink that turned his scars into masterpieces, the curve of his hips—he was perfect.
A shiver ran through me, and Bloom laughed. “I’d love to say that’s from the way you’re staring at me, but I’m fucking freezing, Logan. Take me to bed.”
I took his hand and pulled him inside, where it was warm. He walked right into my chest, his cold hands on my face making me gasp, but then his lips were on mine, which made everything better. Walking back, I stopped at the edge of the bed and sat. He started reaching for me but then stopped cold.
“Bloom?”
He shook his head and gave a nervous laugh. “It’s nothing.”
But he still didn’t move toward me.
“Sweetheart.”
He jutted his chin out stubbornly. “I want you, Logan. So much. I know the things in my mind don’t reflect how I feel about you, and I won’t let them win.”
Bloom climbed into my lap, straddling me. “Bloom, wait.”
“I love kissing you so much,” he moaned. “Logan, you have on too many clothes.”
I caught his hands in mine and held them against my chest. “We need to talk for a minute.”
“Now?”
“Yes. Before we—you know.”
“About what?”
“How you’re feeling. What’s going through your mind. Bloom, I can wait until you’re ready.”
“I am ready. Don’t you see, Logan? If I wait, I’ll let him win, and I won’t let Simms or my parents control my life anymore. I want to be happy with you.”
Smiling, I raised his hands to my lips and kissed his knuckles. “I’m glad you feel this way because there’s something important you should know. You were not raped as a child.”
Bloom went stiff and he tried to pull his hands away, but I held onto to them.
“Hear me out, I’m speaking plainly to you because I can’t afford for you to misunderstand in any way.”
“What do you mean I wasn’t…” Bloom swallowed hard, brow knitted.
“Dr. Simms was playing with your mind, feeding you artificial memories. They’re fake.”
“No!” Bloom hopped off my lap, almost falling in his haste. “That’s not true. I remember! Logan, I remember it happening. I could feel him hurting me, forcing me—”
“I know, baby. I know.” Though I wanted to go to him and wrap him up in my arms, he needed space to think, so I remained seated. “Dr. Simms was a manipulator. He’s done extensive research into hypnotherapy and using it to introduce false memories to his patients. You weren’t the only one. In fact, there’s an entire society of psychiatrists who have been engaging in this practice. They call themselves the Mnemosyne Order. We’ve sent all the files we took from Simms’s office to the police anonymously so they can find those other bastards. More than likely the FBI will be involved since the members seem to be located all over the country.”
“You’re telling the truth.” Bloom clenched his hands into fists.
“I would never lie to you.”
“So none of it is real?”
“No.”
“But I saw it happen in my mind… I saw it…I could feel it. It’s not real.”
I got to my feet then and approached Bloom. Cupping his face, I raised his head, so he was looking at me. “This is a good thing, Bloom. Your brain is telling you right now that you faced that trauma, but you can fight against it because you know it isn’t true.”
“I feel…” Bloom released a shuddering breath. “No! I won’t let Dr. Simms win. This is my body. I won’t let him control me from the grave. Logan, please. I still want you to fuck me.”
“Yes?”
He nodded. “And don’t you dare try to be gentle with me either or I’ll tie you to the bed and fuck myself on your cock the way I want it. Fast and hard. So fucking hard.”
I picked Bloom up and dumped him on the bed. I placed a quick kiss on his nose, then stood to shed my clothes. Bloom shuffled up the bed and turned over to open the drawer of the nightstand. He took out a bottle of lube, a devilish grin on his lips.
“You’ve been thinking about this?” I dropped my jeans and underwear to the floor.
“I’m always thinking about your cock buried deep inside my hole. Nothing’s changed.”
It took everything out of me not to pounce on him, bend back his legs, and fuck him until we both couldn’t think. He was so damn tempting, especially with that filthy mouth of his.
“What?” He spread his legs and snapped open the bottle of lube. “Don’t you dare think about anything else but being inside me, Logan.”
He squeezed lube onto his fingers and slowly rubbed it over his hole. He slipped his middle finger inside, drawing a hiss out of me. I threw my shirt somewhere and hopped onto the bed.
“What are you gonna do to me?” He wrapped his arms around my neck. “Tell me.”
“I’m gonna make you scream my name.”
His eyes were filled with a mix of anticipation and lust as he watched my every move, and when I pressed a featherlight kiss to his collarbone, his breath hitched. His grip on my wrists tightened instinctively under the pleasures I was painting across his skin with my lips.
“Logan.” He squirmed under me, my body pressing his against the bed.
His soft cries only drove me further. I peppered kisses all over his neck and chest, leaving no part of him untouched. His breaths came out in shallow pants as he writhed beneath me. The gentle, wet swirls I traced around his nipples had him moaning and begging for more.
Slowly, very slowly, I trailed downward. He watched with wide eyes as I sucked the tip of his cock between my lips. Bloom arched his back, a soft gasp escaping his lips. I rolled my tongue over the pulsing vein and then around the tip. He gave a choked groan, bucking his hips upward. Steadily I drew the length of him deeper into my mouth, deepthroating him.
Each muffled moan, each shuddering gasp stirred a deep hunger within me. I lifted one of his legs over my shoulder. With his cock still captive between my lips, I let my finger trail over his entrance—slick with lube and already quite inviting. A shiver rushed through Bloom’s body under the dual assault.
“Oh fuck, Logan.” He grabbed the sheet in his fists, his head raised so he could watch me work him to the back of my throat.
I slipped a finger inside his ass and teased him, working it in slowly, matching the rhythm of my mouth on his cock. His body trembled under my touch.
I added another finger, picking up the pace slightly.
His body clenched around me, his moans growing louder with each thrust. His cock twitched against my tongue, the salty taste of precum hitting the back of my throat.
Feeling him tighten around my fingers, I pressed just right, eliciting a high-pitched cry from him. Every inch of him was coiled like a spring, so close to the edge.
Now.
I released his cock and reached for the lube he’d dropped on the bed. In just a few seconds, I was slicked up and positioned at his entrance.
“Logan,” he whined. “Fuck me.”
I covered his mouth with mine and barreled inside him. All it took was that one thrust, and his body shattered, his sticky cum painting our stomachs. My mouth muffled his groans and whimpers.
Oh shit. I wasn’t far behind. I plunged into him, bucking against his body, gripping his hips to pull him into me. His tight hold on me was almost too much to bear, and it pushed me right over the edge. With huffed breaths, I pumped myself into him until I was wrung out dry.
“Jesus.” I collapsed against him, my face buried in the crook of his neck. “That wasn’t even three minutes.”
Bloom wrapped his legs around my waist. “Best thirty seconds of my life.”
I snapped my head up and scowled. “It was at least two minutes.”
Bloom laughed. “Maybe. I was too busy coming to count. That was really good, Logan.”
“You’re satisfied, then? You didn’t have to force yourself through it?”
“No. I want you too much to let the noise in my head win. Fuck Simms. Fuck trauma. I’m not gonna let any of it win. I want to be happy—with you.”
I smiled. “Ah, sweetheart. If there’s anyone in the world who deserves happiness, it’s you.”
I captured his lips with mine in a languid kiss. Turning onto my side, I pulled him into me so I wasn’t crushing him into the mattress anymore. He hoisted his leg over my hip.
“What do you want to do later?” I asked. “It’s not every day you travel to New York.”
“I didn’t expect it to be so big. What do you want to do?”
“How about some sightseeing?”
“Sounds good.” Bloom sighed.
“What’s wrong?”
“Just thinking we would have been married already if shit didn’t go down with Simms and your uncle.”
“Yeah, doesn’t seem appropriate now with Max in the hospital.”
“And Simms’s heart gave out yesterday, so Crowe can’t even take out his frustrations on him anymore.”
I let out a deep breath. Once, I had accompanied Bloom to see Simms, but I hadn’t been able to stick around. How they managed to torture him to that state and still keep him alive with enough consciousness to feel the pain was beyond me.
The shrill ringing of a phone interrupted my thoughts. “That’s yours,” I said.
Bloom groaned as though unwilling to part, but he rolled away and picked up his cell phone. “It’s Crowe.”
He sat up, pulling the sheet over his lap. Oh shit. Had Max taken a bad turn? I sat up next to him, placing a supportive arm around Bloom’s waist. I knew he still blamed himself for what had happened to Max. If Max didn’t make it.
“Put it on speaker,” I said.
He nodded, accepting the call, then hitting the Speaker button. “Hey, Crowe. What’s up?”
“How are things in New York?”
“Okay.” Bloom frowned. “How’s Max?”
“We got good news. He’s awake—weak but talking.”
“He is?”
Oh, sweet relief.
“Yeah. He doesn’t remember the night of the incident, but that’s fine. As long as he pulls through this, nothing else matters.”
“Right. I’m so glad, Crowe.”
“Jamie says he’s doing really well.”
“That’s great, Crowe. We’ll come home right away.”
“Nah, you don’t have to do that. It’s been rough for you lately, and you had to postpone your wedding. Spend a few days in New York before you come back.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, but do not elope while you’re there. Do you hear me, Bloom? I get to walk you down the aisle.”
“I won’t.”
Crowe groaned. “I wish I could believe you, but you do all sorts of crazy shit for that man of yours.”
“There will be no marriage without you, Crowe,” I said.
“That you, Doc?”
I frowned. “I should hope so.”
Crowe’s laugh was such a pleasant thing to hear. Over the past week, he’d been in a pissy mood, and rightly so.
“All right, then. You made a fucking promise. Don’t break it, or I’ll break you in half.”
“For god’s sake, Crowe, if you keep threatening him like this, he won’t want to marry me at all!” Bloom scowled.
“Yeah, yeah, I said what I said. See you soon! You take care of him, Doc, or—”
“You’ll break me in half,” I said in a monotonous voice. “I heard you the first time.”
Crowe’s chuckle rang out before he ended the call. Bloom punched me in the arm. “When are you going to stand up to him and not let him bully you like this?”
“Sweetheart, I’m marrying his little brother. I’ll take all the bullying he dishes out as long as I have you.”
“You’re such a simp.”
“Ah yes, I suppose I am, but you love me.”
“Fuck, yeah, I do.”
“Bloom—” I tumbled him to the bed, and his arms came around me.
“Hmm?”
“Remind me to write our wedding vows.”
“Ah fuck off, Logan. I’m gonna write it the way I can, and you’re gonna love it anyway.”
Yes, I would. He could write the worst vow that was ever written, and I would still love it because it came from him.
My Bloom.