Bright Smile & London Eye (Walker Brothers #2)

13. Chapter Thirteen – Jackson

Jackson

“And that's a wrap for today," Charlie, our new director, shouts, followed by the crew's happy murmur. I sigh happily against Elena’s skin, then quickly get up, climbing out of the bed that was our primary set for the day. Once I stand, I extend my hand to her to help her up.

“Thanks,” she says and shoots me a grin, accepting the robe one of the staff members hands her and ties it around her waist. I look around to see Joey with mine approaching and I sigh relieved as I slip my arms into the satin fabric. They really went all out on these.

"Nice work.” Elena smirks and accepts a bottle of water as we start walking to our trailers.

"Likewise." I force a grin on my face, even though I don’t feel like it at all.

In fact, I hate doing intimate scenes. They’re awkward and exhausting and only something I’ll tolerate for the sake of having cool roles.

And in my case? They also feel like you’re cheating, and it makes me feel disgusting. Not that Lexie and I are together, but there was a moment .

A damned moment and I’m ready to have ‘no intimacy scenes’ written into my contracts from now on. I can’t believe what Lexie’s doing to me.

"What are you doing later? Care to fetch dinner?" Elena asks as I hold the door off set open for her. I’m just about to reject her when we're suddenly stopped by Charlie who wordlessly hands both of us a stack of papers.

"Before you two leave, here's an updated schedule," he explains absentmindedly, rustling through his remaining stack. "Rob messed up a good bit, but if we keep it up, we'll only be a day or two behind. Good work, you two."

I stare at the papers in my hand like they’re going to bite me. I didn’t expect us to be that close to the schedule, but here we are. I don’t even know what’s next yet, but the thought of going back home is enough to make a dull pain throb behind my temples.

I’m not ready to leave London and Lexie behind. And I’m not ready to face my brothers on the regular. Who would have thought? I think the physical distance is helping me deal with their emotional one.

“Huh.” Elena skims through the papers. “I thought we’d be farther behind. Good on us.”

“Yeah. Good on us,” I repeat, although a lot less enthusiastically, which Elena doesn’t seem to notice.

"So?" Elena asks me, looking up from the paper.

"Sorry, I’m out. I'm meeting a friend later.”

Her face lifts into a wide grin and she wiggles her eyebrows at me. "Ah, the mysterious girlfriend."

"She's not my girlfriend," I say, starting to walk away from her. I damned well wish she was though. Her effect on me is like goddamn sunshine after living in the dark for years. I want to capture it, want to call her mine and keep her all to myself.

But Elena quickly catches up. "The woman you have a crush on, then. How's it going on that front?"

"It's not going anywhere," I admit, letting out a frustrated sigh. I'm past the point of denying that I like Lexie as more than a friend, but that doesn't mean I'm going to act on it. “She's still fresh out of a very long relationship, and she doesn’t seem eager to date.”

“So are you seriously okay with being her friend forever?” she wonders, and I come to an abrupt stop.

“Why?”

"Because if you don't want that to be a permanent spot, you have to at least make your intentions clear. I doubt she can read your mind and you, my friend," she taps against my shoulder, “are especially hard to read. Give her something to work with.”

She winks at me, then struts ahead, disappearing around the corner to her trailer, as I stare after her, completely dumbfounded.

Damn. She has a point.

But how do I tell Lexie that I want more than friendship without her, understandably, running for the hills?

It might have been close to two months, but from time to time I still catch her staring into nothingness, that same sadness from right after the breakup like an impenetrable aura around her.

Then again, we had that moment. That moment as I brought her home and we spent for what felt like forever looking at each other, sparks flying between our eyes.

I’d almost kissed her but chickened out at the last moment. Yet it would have been perfect. But so is every moment I spend with her.

With a sigh, I trudge over to my trailer. I have a lot to think about.

The corners of my mouth lift without any conscious input from me as soon as Lexie flurries into sight, curly hair and her scarf flying in tonight's strong wind.

It’s another evening of not having concrete plans since most attractions and tourist spots are closed anyway. Which means, we’re probably going on a walk wherever our feet and conversation lead us, but those have always been my favorite evenings with her.

"How was your day?" she greets me, and we start walking, instantly falling into step with each other as we strut down the street.

“It was…” I try to find the proper word that I would describe Elena’s and my steamy scenes with. “… unusual.” She tilts her head at me curiously and even though I’d rather swallow a handful of nails, I continue. “Today, we shot some steamy scenes; that tends to be awkward.”

“Not sexy?” she wonders with her eyebrow raised high, but I quickly shake my head.

“No, trust me. It’s not sexy at all.” I chuckle and instinctively reach for her hand as we start walking. “I’ve never much cared for intimacy scenes. They’re harder than any fight choreography I’ve ever had to learn and take much more attention than fights as well.”

“I just love that you’re comparing sex to a fight.” Lexie giggles and laces her cold fingers with mine.

“Fights are cut and dry. You do your choreography, the stuntmen and -women do the real work to make you look great and that’s it. But intimacy scenes? No body doubles there, at least not that I’ve ever worked with. You have to bring the emotion along with your choreography and you need to be in tune with your acting partner.”

“That sounds exhausting.”

“It really, really is.” I glance at her, only to meet her curious stare. “So no. Not sexy at all. Thank God we have the new director; just the thought of doing those scenes with the old one breathing down our necks makes me want to puke.”

“So you’re still happy with them?”

"Hell yeah. Ever since they took over, filming has been smooth sailing," I tell her with a grin. "We got our updated schedule today, and it looks like we’re about three more weeks out."

"Three more weeks out what?" she wonders, a confused smile on her face.

"Well, until we’re done shooting," I say, instantly noticing her demeanor change as she stops in her tracks.

"Oh." She shakes her head like she wants to shake off a bad thought, then continues walking.

Does she sound disappointed or am I just imagining it?

"Does that mean you’re going to have to leave in three weeks as well?"

Yes, that’s definitely disappointment in her voice.

"I honestly don’t know," I tell her, biting my lip. I know one of my upcoming projects had to be postponed indefinitely. Something about funding and the availability of one of the other actors, but I’ll have to check in with Adam.

Then again, I don’t give a fuck. I’m not leaving London with things as they are between us.

"Oh," she says again, and we continue walking in silence, our interlaced hands gently swinging and bumping into each other from time to time.

"You know, I—"

"I think—"

We both start talking at the same time, freezing when we realize we’re interrupting each other and bursting into laughter.

"You first," I tell her with an amused grin.

"I’m going to be sad when you leave," she says, a tinge of sadness reflected in her eyes. "I’m really enjoying our London exploration dates."

"Dates?" I raise an eyebrow at her and pull her to a halt with me. She instantly blushes, trying to hide her red cheeks by burying her face into her scarf and pulling her hand out of my grasp to pull it higher.

"Wait, no, I mean dates, but like friendship,” she whispers, her words stumbling over each other, her eyes darting everywhere around us but me and holy shit . She’s nervous. “Unless you…"

She lets the end of the sentence fly in the air. If she’d turn her head, she’d see the brightest smile creeping onto my face, warmth rushing to my cheeks. I lift my hand to hide them from her, then quickly drop it because—why the hell?

Fuck, I’m ecstatic, heart fluttering, and I don’t think I’ll get that smile off my face for the rest of the day.

She wants to date me.

Elena’s voice echoes in my head, urging me to make a move, but I push it away. This is our moment. Ours alone.

"Maybe we should start calling them dates from here on out. What do you think?" I suggest softly, reaching for her hand again that she’s now buried in her coat pocket.

I feel her whole body tense as I intertwine our fingers once more.

"You mean real dates?" she whispers, eyes wide and her breath forming a white cloud in front of her face.

"I’d understand if you aren’t ready," I quickly add, my eyes fixated on our hands. Fuck, I’m nervous. "But I’d really like them to be real dates. The ‘more than friendship’ kind."

"No, I…" She takes a moment, taking a deep breath before releasing it in a long sigh. "It’s not like I’m hung up on Derek," she quickly clarifies, her voice quivering with nervousness. "This isn’t a rebound thing.”

“I know it isn’t,” I assure her, fighting the urge to just pull her to me and kiss the next words off her lips.

"I like you, Jackson. Really, it’s a bit embarrassing how much I like you, considering how short we’ve known each other. But Derek is a thing that happened, and I guess all I’m saying is you have to be patient with me if we do this."

"We can take it slow," I promise her, squeezing her hand, my cheeks already hurting. "No need to rush. We have all the time in the world."

"Do we really though?" She finally glances up at me, and the sadness in her eyes sends a twinge right to my heart. "I mean, you just said you’ll be done with your job here in three weeks. There will be an ocean between us if you have to go back. Those aren’t exactly ideal circumstances to take things slow and start dating."

"You’re thinking five steps ahead," I scold her playfully, noting the tint it brings to her cheeks again. But it also flattens that adorable crease between her eyebrows. "What do you want, Lexie? That’s all that matters right now.”

I gently pull her arm until she fully faces me, taking her other hand in mine as well. They’re ice cold and trembling slightly, so I rub my thumb over the back of her hand to warm them.

"Tell me, Lexie,” I implore gently. “If it’s a no, it’s a no. I’ll live. But I don’t want to stay in this friendship under false pretenses. I’d like to date you. Will you let me?"

She bites her lip in the most adorable way, her eyes darting around my head, every so slightly avoiding my gaze. I let go of one hand, cradling her cheek and lifting her face gently to make her look at me.

"What do you say?"

I breath a soft sigh of relief when her eyes finally meet mine, darting from left to right as she gnaws on her lip. "Fuck it," she finally whispers and rises to her tiptoes, pressing her lips to mine.

And it’s like fireworks are going the fuck off in my stomach.

My eyes flutter closed, and I sigh happily against her lips, trying to take it all in. Take her in. The softness of her lips, her breath feathering over my cheek, the way her wild hair feels under my palm as I cup her face. I want to bottle up this moment, keep it for myself to revisit during sleepless nights, just to daydream of her.

I smile into the kiss, keep grinning even when she breaks it and steps back slightly, looking at me with plump lips and an awestruck look on her face.

"Please tell me that’s a yes?"

She looks at me, stunned. Then her lips curl into the faintest smile.

"Yes," she finally whispers, her cheeks blushing, accentuated by her breath turning white in the cold autumn air. And it’s like the weight of the fucking London Eye falls off my shoulders. "I’d like to date you."

Her lips break into the smallest smile, and I can’t resist. I pull her to me, wrapping my arms around her tightly in a hug so mighty it makes my heart sing and laughter bubble out of me.

After a moment, she joins my laughter with the most adorable giggle, her arms snaking around my middle and she returns my embrace just as tightly.

"Thank fucking god," I whisper against her wool hat, feeling her shake with laughter. "You left me goddamn nervous for a minute there, Lexie."

"I’m making you nervous?" she asks, her voice muffled against my jacket. " I’m making a big movie star nervous?"

"Hell yes." I grin into her hair. “You have no idea what you do to me, Beautiful.”

"Why are you grinning so dumbly?" Reed asks me only seconds after joining our supposed-to-be weekly family call. In reality, it’s the first one in a month.

I’ve tried to keep it a standing thing. I really did. But then Adam started to excuse himself almost every week, citing date nights with Lily. Zoey never joined without giving a reason and Tanner couldn’t give less of a shit, apparently. I’m surprised he’s showing his face today; I expected a one on one with Reed to be honest.

God, this day has been a whirlwind. First the sex scenes with Elena, then the emotional rollercoaster of the evening and now it’s almost one in the morning and I still haven’t processed a thing.

I finally got to end our walk by kissing Lexie goodbye at her door. Something I’ve been itching to do for weeks now, and holy fuck, was it worth the wait.

"Are you drunk?" Tanner asks, worry written all over his face that doesn’t disappear when I shake my head.

“Any of you heard from Adam?” I ask, ignoring their questions.

“He’ll be a bit late,” Reed says, reaching for his phone and typing something. I eye the clock in my room. For once, exhaustion has settled in every single one of my bones, but I wasn’t about to let this call slip through my fingers. It’s the last string to keep us brothers together and you better believe I’ll be holding onto it with all my might.

"Have any of you heard from Zoey?" I ask them. The last time I did was when I asked her for advice on comforting Lexie. All messages of me trying to check in with her went ignored.

And judging by the looks on their faces, they haven’t been in touch with her either.

"Why do you two look so crestfallen? Did something happen?"

"No, no, nothing like that," Reed quickly assures me, and I breathe a sigh of relief.

“Fuck, you had me scared for a second,” I groan and pinch the bridge of my nose. “Then what is it?”

"It’s just that she seems to have cut contact with all of us. It’s like she disappeared off the face of the earth."

"Well, damn," I sigh, crossing my arms and lean back in my computer chair. "Did anything happen before she jumped into that moving truck?" From what I remember, that is the moment that she grew more distant, despite choosing her university herself. It’s not like we just randomly sent her away.

"Not that I know of," Tanner grumbles, and Reed is quick to agree.

"Everything was normal. She got to university, and just like that"—he snaps his fingers—"poof, gone she was. I see an Instagram story or status from time to time, but that’s it. I had a job closeby and asked her to meet up but she all but told me to leave her the fuck alone."

"Is that how it’s supposed to go?" Reed wonders aloud, looking past his camera, melancholy written on his face. "She grows up and then just… disappears?"

I fight to not roll my eyes. He's acting like he kept in contact during his university days when, spoiler alert, he didn't. Messages went unanswered for weeks or completely ignored and he's not much better now. If it weren't for these game nights, my last check-up message from three months ago would still be unanswered.

"Is it hormones?" Tanner asks, earning eye rolls from both Reed and me.

"Not everything is hormones, man," I chuckle, shaking my head at him, then exhale a deep sigh. "Maybe she’s just sick of us."

"Yeah," Reid says, sadness making his voice break, and clears his throat. "Maybe that."

For a while, we sit in silence, each of us doing his own thing. Me staring at the clock, Reed on his phone, and Tanner throwing some kind of little ball up and down until he suddenly drops it and sits upright again.

"You changed topics, you sneaky bastard!" he accuses, pointing at where I assume my image is on his screen.

"I did no such thing."

"Then tell us—why were you grinning so creepily?"

"That is private," I reply. Usually, I’d be all too happy to share, but not with the way things are right now. At this point, we’re barely even friends—definitely not close enough to share dating-news in such early stages.

Tanner is just about to object and continue his interrogation when Adam joins the call.

“Sorry, guys. How have you been?”

Thankfully, the attention shifts, and within minutes, we’re all focused on beating each other in a car race instead of interrogating each other’s dating lives.