Broken Country (Reese’s Book Club)

41. Monday Night

Monday Night

In bed, Frank’s voice cuts out from the darkness. “I saw you.”

The sickening rise of my blood, my pulse. White noise rushing in my ears. I wait a moment before turning the lamp on. “Saw me when?” I say, trying to sound relaxed on this, my first ever day of infidelity.

“At the wedding. You and him.”

“Gabriel?”

“Obviously.”

“Saw me with him, when? I hardly spoke to him.”

“At the beginning, before the speeches.”

“With Leo, you mean?”

He nods.

“And?” My voice is calm, I am too good at this. Already I can pretend, effortlessly.

“You know what.”

“I don’t, Frank. I can’t read your mind.”

“You used to be able to.”

I hate his inverted smile, the corners of his mouth turned down. We were always so good at communicating without words. It meant we could leave parties early with nothing more than a raised eyebrow or a glance at the door.

“You’re annoyed with me for talking to Gabriel and Leo at the wedding, is that it?”

“I saw how you looked at him. Sorry if that makes me sound like a jealous freak.”

Frank smiles a little, his old self.

“Maybe. But you’re my jealous freak,” I say.

“Hope so.”

“You know so.”

And then we’re kissing and it doesn’t even feel wrong, kissing one man, and then another. They are different things.

This is a love story with too many beginnings. I refuse to think about how it is going to end.