Chapter 10
10
SOFIA
I sit in my alcove for a long time, pondering everything I thought I knew about myself. I’m viewing my life through a magnifying lens, judging all of my decisions and actions. All of my thoughts.
Am I good? I’ve always believed it, but can find no evidence.
“He’s just messing with me,” I say.
Gideon got under my skin and in my head. By his own admission, he’s good at it.
But it doesn’t make what he said any less true. It makes me desperate to do something good, anything— help and a little old lady cross the street, rescue an injured bird, give a kidney.
However, none of it would be selfless now that Gideon pointed it out. It would be nothing more than an attempt to prove the Devil wrong.
The Devil…
What if he is the Devil? How would he know me so well? What does that make me?
His .
The thought sends a shiver through me.
“Ugh!” I slam my fist against the cushion beneath me. I want to kill Gideon for doing this to me.
By lunchtime, when we split a huge club sandwich and chips, I’ve obsessed so much I feel sick to my stomach.
“You’re not eating,” Gideon points out the obvious.
“I’m not hungry.” I set the enormous sandwich down.
“Starving yourself isn’t the way to my heart?”
I roll my eyes. “I’m taking a day off from that.”
“A day? You just started this morning.”
“Well, this morning I was someone else. I was sure of who I was. Good. Sweet. Now thanks to you, I have no idea who I am anymore.” I bite my lower lip and wrap my arms around myself. “Who am I?”
Gideon lets out a long breath. Setting his food down, he elegantly dabs at the sides of his mouth with his napkin. He stands and says, “Come with me.”
“Where?”
“I wasn’t ready to show you this yet, but it seems you need something to keep you busy so you don’t go down a self-destruct rabbit hole.”
I follow him out of the dining room, past the kitchen and to that narrow stairwell I’ve been too chicken to explore. It’s dark, even while the sun is out.
Peeking in, I raise my eyes upward, to where the stairs ascend in a spiral, and down as they disappear to a level beneath us.
“Where do they lead? The dungeon?” I ask sarcastically, hesitant to enter.
“Basement.”
“Same thing.”
“Not really.” When I don’t move, he extends his hand. “Trust me, you’ll like what I’m hiding down here.”
“Bodies?”
Not waiting for me to comply, he snatches my wrist and tugs me down. As we go, a light automatically turns on, then another and another. They illuminate the space as we go.
The basement is made of concrete floors and walls, basic and nondescript as we emerge into a foyer of sorts. To our right are two steel doors, both with electronic key panels.
“What’s in there?” I ask him.
“The bodies.”
I narrow my gaze on him. “Wouldn’t surprise me if that’s true.”
We continue on, into a short hall. It’s humid in here, the air smelling like water. When we go through an archway, I see why.
“You have a pool?” I pause to take in the beautiful grotto.
The water, a light teal, reflects off the glass tile mural on the ceiling. Pillars rise from the pool and form pointed arches above, lending the place a Romano-gothic sort of feel.
“This is beautiful,” I remark, fancying a swim all of a sudden.
“I’ll order you swimsuits,” Gideon says, once again reading my mind. “You can come anytime you’d like.”
Now that I know the lights will come on automatically, I will.
“Do you have a map of the house?” I ask. “I’ve apparently been missing out on the best parts.”
“I’ll draw one for you. You can go anywhere you’d like.”
“Anywhere?”
“If a door is locked, don’t try.” He points to the doors we passed earlier. “Otherwise, have fun.”
Though I’d love to stay here longer, I also want to see what surprise he has for me. We continue beyond the pool room and other interesting spaces, such as a billiards room and gym. Finally, at the end, we reach another steel door. This one doesn’t have a lock.
He props it open for me and motions me to enter through a set of black vinyl strip curtains. I go through, pushing the heavy things out of my way, and stop when I see why they’re needed.
“What is this?” I ask, dumbly.
“You’re a photographer. Don’t you know what it is?”
Of course I know what it is. I practically lived in a dark room. Though rustic in comparison to the one at Columbia, it has everything I’d need to develop film. To the right are shelves full of chemicals, gloves, aprons, and eye protection. To the left are a sink and a counter with trays. Two wire lines with clips to secure developed photos hang above that.
So no, I don’t need an explanation of what this is all for.
“I’m asking…” What am I asking? What this is supposed to mean? Is it a peace offering? “Is it Belle’s library?”
He frowns. “Belle’s library?”
“Have you never watched Beauty and the Beast?”
“I don’t have much time for movies.”
I roll my eyes. “The beast captures Belle and forces her to live in his castle. He offers her a library as consolation for the loss of her freedom. She’s so gullible that she actually falls in love with him because of it.”
I leave out the part where I also fell in love with the beast when I was a kid. Same went for the Goblin king from Labyrinth when he put Sarah in that Masquerade ball bubble, even though he caged her in a hellish maze. Actually, I fell in love with just about every other handsome villain thatI desperately wanted to get the girl. Yeah, I see the pattern. But just because I know my weakness for bad boys, doesn’t mean Gideon has to.
“I won’t fall in love with you,” I say to drive the point home, mostly for my own sake.
His lips tug upward in that infuriating smile, like he finds everything I say amusing.
“Stop it,” I hiss.
“What?”
“Smiling. I’m not kidding.”
Hiding his smile behind his hand, quite ineffectively I might add, he shakes his head. “I believe you.”
“I’m serious, Gideon. There is nothing you can give me that will ever make me love you. Nothing.”
Suddenly, his grin vanishes, this time for real. I immediately want it back when what replaces it is far too terrifying, not because it’s ugly, but because of my instant reaction to it.
Gideon’s eyes glimmer as they rake over me. It’s that predator stare that sparks to life my need to be consumed.
“Are you sure about that? There is nothing I can give you? Nothing I can… do?” His voice lowers to dangerous depths.
He takes a step toward me, and I take one in retreat, but the counter at my back stops me. The smile returns, but the hunter’s glimmer in his gaze remains.
When he comes closer, I lift a hand to stop him. “Don’t.”
“Why, Little Bird, are you so afraid of me?”
I swallow hard, through the tightness in my throat. Damn, it’s hard to breathe with this man so near. “I’m not afraid of you.”
He dips his head, his lips dangerously close to mine. I tilt my face up to his, expectantly. His mouth is only an inch away, and I can almost taste it. I can almost feel the heat of it.
But the kiss doesn’t come. Gideon pulls away with a knowing grin because he can read me so well. He could tell I expected a kiss. That I fucking wanted it.
My hand twitches with the need to slap him.
“I was just reaching for this,” he says, and gives me a black box. “It was behind you. You didn’t think I was going to?—”
“Shut up.” I snatch the box from him and put it on the counter. When I open it, I gasp. It’s a camera. Not just any camera, but a Leica Rangefinder. “Oh my God.”
“Do you like it?”
“I—” I’m speechless. It’s such an expensive camera that I never even considered the possibility of ever owning one someday. “I—” I gently pull out the lenses and other small tools and inspect them. Then, with the care I’d use handling a newborn, I lift the camera itself.
My hands are trembling, but I hold it in place against my eye and turn to Gideon. He smiles wide and I snap a photo.
The light flashes and he rubs his eyes. “I had it preloaded for you. Not by me. By a professional.”
“Did they help you design this room too?”
“Yes. He told me what to get. It was an empty storage room, so it wasn’t hard to do.”
“Thank you,” I whisper. “Thank you for this.”
“You’re welcome. While you determine if you’re a good or bad person, you can at least know this about you. You’re a passionate photographer,” he says. “Not even I can make you doubt that.”
I nod. “There is that, I suppose.”
He makes to leave, but turns back to me. “Oh, and one more thing.”
Before I can ask what that is, he fists the front of my shirt and pulls me to him. Our mouths crash and the impact is enough to knock all my senses askew. I’m instantly surrounded by him, infiltrated and consumed. He is everywhere, taking everything.
When his arm snakes around my waist to pull me tighter, I melt into him. And when he pushes me against the counter and his hands cup my ass and lift me onto it, I open my legs to make it easier for him to stand between them.
He presses himself into me, creating the most achingly delicious pressure point against my core. Heat and something liquid forms in my center. I’m craving what I’ve never had before, but instinctually know I want it. Fullness. Thrusts. Pleasure.
I make a sound that’s foreign to me, a combination of a mewl and a cry. It’s my body begging for something that I refuse to put into words, because if I do, it means willing defeat. It tilts my own needle away from good and toward a man that fits the definition of a villain to a tee.
The problem is, I’m still vulnerable. He’s exposed my weakness and is exploiting it.
I want him and that’s what will damn me in the end.
Gideon pulls away, leaving me dazed and cold. His eyes are molten silver, swirling and mesmerizing.
“I’m going to fuck you in this room, Little Bird. Not today, you’re not ready. But soon. And then, you’ll be something else too.”
“What?” I ask breathlessly.
“Mine.”