Burning the Midnight Oil: A Single Dad Small Town Romance

Chapter 17

I’m officially a divorced man.

Jade and I are leaving the courthouse right now, the paperwork signed and filed, and I’m filled with a mix of emotions. I’m relieved that this process is over, and I’m happy that we can finally move on with our lives, but in the same breath, I also can’t help but feel a sense of sadness over the loss. Not necessarily because I thought we should’ve stayed together, but because both of us put so much of ourselves into this marriage over the years. We’ve both given up and sacrificed so much…for it to just end. And it wasn’t always terrible. We had some incredible times. Some happy times. We brought a beautiful, bright life into this world together.

The end of something as monumental as this is bound to cause an array of emotions, and I’ve heard people say this, but I guess I just thought I wouldn’t be one of them.

Stopping in front of the cars, Jade turns to face me.

“How’re you feeling?” I ask her, pulling her in for a hug. It’s quick, but comforting.

She gives me a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes. “I’m okay. Kind of sad, kind of…free, I guess. I don’t really know how to explain it.”

Chuckling, I say, “No, I totally get it, because I feel the same.”

Jade crosses her arms over her chest, peering up at me, eyes squinting from the sun. “So, what now?”

“I guess we head home?” I don’t know why I phrase it as a question.

“Okay.” She nods. “I have to stop by my parents’ house to pick up some stuff they got for Suzy, but I can meet you there.”

“Sounds good,” I murmur, and then we get in our separate vehicles.

When I pull up to the house, Grady’s car is in the driveway as expected, and my stomach clenches as I walk up the steps leading to the front door. I don’t see Grady, Suzy, or Mabel as I enter the house, so after I kick my shoes off, I amble through the house in search of them. They aren’t in the living room or the kitchen. Grady’s room looks empty as I pass it, so I head up the stairs.

The light in Suzy’s room is on, and I hear low chatter, so I stroll down the hall, peeking my head into her room quietly. The sight before me takes my breath away, which is surprising. Mabel is on the bed sleeping while Suzy and Grady are sitting on her floor. She has a hot pink shag rug laid in front of her bed that they’re occupying. Suzy has her hands held out in front of her as she admires them while Grady paints her toenails. Neither of them has noticed me yet, but the bright smile on Suzy’s face makes my chest tighten.

This past weekend, Jade and I finally sat Suzy down and told her about the divorce. We probably should’ve told her sooner, but we didn’t want to confuse or worry her until we needed to. With our plan to not sell the house until the fall, it didn’t seem necessary to tell her before now. She took it better than I expected her to. She was confused, and had several questions, but for the most part, once we reassured her that we would both still love her to the moon and back, she seemed to be okay.

She’s too young to fully grasp it, I think, and she’ll probably have more questions as time goes on, and maybe even be a little more emotional when we move out of this house, but until then, I’m glad she knows. It makes me feel better seeing her so happy, like she is right now. Like maybe we aren’t totally screwing up her childhood after all.

“Do you like this color?” she asks Grady.

“I do,” he replies, glancing up to look at her, pausing his work on her toes. “It looks beautiful on you, Suzy Q.”

“Can I paint your nails?”

I expect him to say no or to laugh it off, but he doesn’t. He gets back to work on her right foot as he says, “Sure, if you want to. We could match. How cool would that be?”

Her dark brown eyes widen. “So cool!”

Unable to help myself, I watch them for a little while longer. They’re bound to notice me soon, so I soak it in while I can. He’s so good with her, and he’s adapted so easily. She loves being around him, and he never seems annoyed by her.

Grady takes her to the arena a lot when he has to go down there, which is something she’s always begged me to do, but I’ve never been able to because my training is so hands on. I wouldn’t be able to watch her properly. She loves the horses. Growing up around the rodeo, I’ve always had a love and appreciation for the animals too, so I enjoy getting to watch her bond with them.

His back is to me, so I can’t see the concentration on his face, but I can tell he’s trying very hard to make her nails look nice. Every once in a while, he’ll mess up and have to start over. And Suzy watches his every move like she’s trying to memorize what to do, so when it’s her turn to paint his, she can perfect it.

Eventually, Suzy glances over, catching me standing in the doorway. “Daddy!”

“Hey, baby. Whatcha doing?”

Entering the room, I close the space between us. Grady throws me a look over his shoulder, his lip tugging into a small grin on one side as our gaze connects. “Hey, you just get back?”

I nod. “Yup. Jade will be home soon.”

“Look, Daddy! Uncle Grady painted my nails.”

“They’re very pretty, sweetie.”

“Uncle Grady’s going to let me paint his next!” The excitement shines in her tone and the wide grin on her face that makes her eyes squint.

“Is that so?” I glance down at Grady and breathe out a laugh.

“Yeah, purple’s really my color, don’t you think?”

“A hundred percent,” I tease.

Grady flashes me a toothy grin and winks before bringing his attention back to Suzy’s toes. The sight causes a flutter in my stomach that I don’t understand. I end up sitting on the edge of the bed beside Mabel while they finish up. There’s a lump in my throat as I watch them. Mabel’s awake now, rolled over onto her back so I can pet her belly, but it’s automatic. I’m not fully here because my mind is taking note of everything it shouldn’t.

Like how Grady’s thick, dark brown brows knit together with concentration as he applies the paint to the nails. When he messes up and gets some on her skin, he scrapes it away with his thumbnail before wiping it off on his sweats. The black material has little purple spots where he’s done it more than once. He’s wearing a Powder Ridge snapback on his head turned backwards, messy honey blond pieces hanging out from underneath and curling around his ears.

His eyelashes are dark and long. Curly. From here, it looks like they’re fanning over the apples of his cheeks with the way his eyes are downcast onto Suzy’s feet, but every once in a while, he’ll glance up at her face, a smile spreading that warms my chest. She sits so patiently while he works.

I never noticed before how nice his bone structure is, but I can’t help but track it with my eyes. His nose is straight and narrow, cheeks high, jawline prominent. Lips are full and cherry red, his teeth clamp down on his bottom one currently as he works. It’s endearing and kind of adorable how focused he is on making sure he does a good job.

Grady finishes up. “What do you think, pretty girl?” he asks her.

“I love it!” She turns her hands toward me. “Look at my toes, Daddy!”

“They look very nice. Looks like Uncle Grady knows what he’s doing.”

My gaze meets Grady’s, and something flashes through his eyes that I can’t place. He swallows, and I can’t help but look down and track the way his Adam’s apple bobs in his throat. Grady’s the first to break eye contact, moving his attention to Suzy as he hands her the nail polish bottle.

“Your turn, Suzy Q.”

She squeals with excitement, and he quickly shows her how to pull the brush out and wipe it on the edge of the bottle as to not make a mess. She still makes a mess, mostly all over his fingers, but he’s a good sport the entire time.

Grady looks up at me as she’s busy painting his thumb nail, catching me watching him. My heartbeat thumps loudly in my ears at being caught, and I feel my cheeks heat.

“Everything go okay today?” he asks coolly.

I nod once. “Yeah, it went fine.”

“It’s done?”

“Yup.”

“Are ‘congratulations’ or an ‘I’m sorry’ in order here?”

The sincerity in his tone makes me chuckle. “Somewhere in the middle, probably.”

He grins. “Well, congratu-sorry then.”

That really makes me laugh. “Thanks, G. Appreciate that.”

Neither of us looks away, and the air in here feels thicker somehow. Like it’s evaporating around us. I can feel his gaze on me like a physical force, and it’s confusing…but alluring at the same time. I don’t get it. The hairs on the back of my neck stand and the organ in my chest clenches. His eyes are soft on mine, and they melt something inside of me.

My tongue feels thick in my mouth, and I swallow against the dryness coating my throat. I should say something, break up this tense silence, but before I can, movement catches to my right. Turning my gaze over there, I spot Jade standing in the doorway, her eyes trained on Suzy painting Grady’s nails, the smile on her face genuine and bright.

Guilt racks my nerves as I stand off the bed. I don’t understand the feelings bubbling inside of me. They’re foreign, but happening more and more. Jade steps into the room, taking my place on the bed, and I excuse myself, telling them I’m heading to the gym. Maybe a hard, long workout is just what I need to get out of my head.