Cage Me: A Wolf Shifter Romantasy (Immortal Vices and Virtues: Shadow Shifter Bonds Book 1)

Chapter 18

Since the moment I saw the message on Spencer’s phone about unlocking my wolf, I haven’t been able to think of anything else. For over nine hundred years, I’ve been forced to live without my other half. The first couple hundred were the worst, and I shudder at their memory.

Fury that doesn’t even come close to touching what I have now. If Kel had merely caged my wolf and left me as I was, I could have murdered half of Tartarus. Hell, I wanted to.

My only saving grace was the fact that I couldn’t move.

Even now, thinking back on those darkest days, my chest tightens and my fingers curl into fists, desperate to beat in someone’s face.

I should be thrilled knowing that by day’s end, I’ll be reunited with my wolf. Yet, for some reason, all I can focus on is the bad that has happened since losing him.

All the time that was stolen from me, the life I could have had, the few people in my life that I thought might have given a shit about me.

“Drake?” Spencer’s voice breaks through my fiery haze, but it’s her touch that startles me most.

Her fingers are ice cold against my heated skin. Not only that, but the glow from my tattoo is back, bright enough that it’s shining through my shirt.

“We don’t have to do this if you’re not ready or unsure about the consequences,” she says quietly, nodding toward Spells.

How the hell are we here already? I don’t remember any of the walk from Kasha’s to here. Not even a flicker of the crowds I’m sure we passed.

What the fuck is wrong with me?

“I know Natalia is—” Spencer starts to say, but I shake my head.

“It’s not the witch. It’s just…”

“A lot,” Spencer finishes for me and I nod. She grimaces, then adds, “I hate to admit this because I don’t like believing that Kel is truly linked to you, but what if she knows that you’re about to set your wolf free and break the rest of her curse? What if she’s fucking with you right now while she still can?”

That thought hadn’t even occurred to me. I realize Spencer sees me mostly as the desperate man who wouldn’t let her go, but I’ve lived with this underlying wrath for centuries. It took countless years to control the darker parts of me, and that isn’t a side I want my mate to know.

Except she also needs to be aware that I’m not as perfect as she seems to think.

“If Kel is screwing with me, she’s only pulling on my true emotions,” I say honestly. “I was born into a prison world, built for darkness. Controlling my inner beast was something I had to learn to do on my own after being abandoned by my father before I was even born and then again by my mother when I was ten. My anger problems only grew from there. I’d thought I was getting a hold on them after nearly two decades on my own. Then, she showed up.”

Looking back now, it was as if Kel had known every button of mine to push. The ones to make me sympathize with her, befriend her, and even how to be furious with the witch. Everything except how to make me fall in love with her.

Hell, I wasn’t even attracted to her. Not once had I even considered fucking her. A fact that I’m sure pissed her off nearly as much as my rejection.

Spencer’s hand covers my chest. “I didn’t know about your parents. I’m sorry.”

Her words soften some of the hardness around my heart that has grown throughout the morning. “It’s in the past now. Let’s just get this done.”

Her brows pinch together. “Are you sure?”

No, I’m not, not in the slightest, but I’ve let this go on for too long now. It’s time to take control of my life again.

Holding Spencer’s face between my hands, I quickly kiss her and force a smile to my face that I know will bring her a semblance of peace. “I’m positive. Let’s go inside.”

She nods as her eyes search my face. I’m not sure what they see or even if she buys my bullshit, but either way, she reaches for the door to Spells and pulls it open.

We turn to go inside, but Natalia is already there. “Oh, good. You’re here. Follow me.”

The witch heads toward the alleyway we took last night, but Spencer doesn’t move. “Where are you going?”

Natalia turns back, looks at me, then Spencer before chuckling. “Did you really think that I was going to unleash a wild animal in my shop? That would make me the stupidest witch in existence.”

She makes a point, but there’s still another concern. “What about the dark energy from the curse?” I ask. “Letting that out into the world probably isn’t any better.”

She makes a clicking noise with her tongue and keeps walking as she replies, “It’s like you two don’t trust me. I have this handled.”

Her confidence seems strong, but still, my earlier rage lingers just beneath the surface. The only thing keeping me in check is Spencer’s hand wrapped around mine.

She keeps casting glances at me but doesn’t say anything. I know she’s worried, and I’d be lying if I said I’m not as well. Still, I need to do this.

I need to know if there is a chance that I can have my life back even if we never find Kel.

While I’ve made the assumption this whole time that she’s going to come after me, it hasn’t been far from my mind that maybe she chose to run from me.

Now, she could have been running back to Earth to see if her family is still alive and had every intention of coming back—that’s what I believe most—but she also could have been done with her prison and my stubbornness.

Still, there won’t be a day that passes for the rest of my life that I won’t wonder when she might reappear if we don’t end this. I don’t want to spend my life with Spencer that way. She deserves better than that and so do I.

We get to the park, and I realize we had passed by it last night, but I hadn’t paid any attention. There are thick trees spread out, green grass overgrown by at least a foot, and broken benches. Not somewhere I assume too many people visit any longer.

Natalia stops about thirty feet into the grass and points to a tree, then at Spencer. “You’ll wait over there. Drake, stand in front of me before I put up the barrier spell.”

“You’re not separating us,” Spencer says with a deep rumble.

I put my hand on her shoulder and offer her another forced smile. “Listen to her, Dove. I need to know you’re not at risk of being hurt or I’ll fight the spell.”

Which would then cause me even more pain, but I don’t add that part for Spencer. She’s smart enough to figure that on her own.

Her fingers grip my shirt, and she yanks me forward. “You better be okay. I didn’t decide to like you only for you to die the next day. Got it?”

I grin widely. “Yes, Mate.”

She kisses me with a ferocity that I’m happy to return, but as soon as my hands grab her hips, a bolt of shock runs through my spine.

“Not that this isn’t sweet, but this is a time-sensitive spell,” Natalia says, looking everywhere but at us.

Spencer backs up and lets out a heavy breath. “You’re going to be fine.”

I’m certain she says the words more for herself than me, but I agree with her anyway. “This will be over soon.”

At least I hope so.

I stand in front of Natalia, and she pulls a vial out of the inner pocket of her black jacket. Throwing it on the ground, a shimmering fog appears, rising about ten feet above us before spreading out and creating a thirty-foot diameter.

Spencer is standing close by, watching, but I don’t look back at her. I don’t want her to see the fear in my eyes. The parts I’ve been trying to hide from her since the moment she woke up.

It’s not just my rage getting the better of me, it’s the fact that I haven’t forgotten Natalia said I could die from this spell.

To have my life end after last night’s glimpse of the joy I could share with my mate for the rest of our lives… I can’t stand the thought of losing that.

“This is going to hurt,” Natalia says, sympathy heavily lacing her words. “You can survive this, Drake, but you’re going to need to fight. Kel has had her magical claws in you longer than any other spell I’ve broken before. I’m going to have to burn you from the inside out to remove her presence and set your wolf free. Are you ready for that?”

Without hesitating, I nod. “I can handle whatever you need to do.”

She frowns and glances back at Spencer before looking at me again. “I’ve blocked out the sounds from the outside world and she can’t hear us, either. You might be able to handle the pain you’re about to endure, but something tells me that your mate is another story. Just know, you’re not going to be able to hear her throughout the process. It’s just me and you.”

Considering I’ve hated witches since the moment I met Kel, I feel oddly at peace as soon as she says that. Maybe it’s not having to worry about Spencer’s screams or scaring her with my own or even just acceptance that this is happening regardless of what the outcome is going to be. At least my hell will finally be over.

Whatever the reason, I close my eyes, focus on the image of my wolf, even if I can’t feel him right now, and let my body relax. “Do whatever you have to.”

Natalia says nothing else, and I keep my eyes closed, pushing away as much of the fear and wrath as I can.

I won’t die today. I can’t.

A warm hand covers my chest where the tattoo is. There’s a pulsing sensation that starts to thrum in time with my heart, and the spot gets hotter by the second.

Natalia removes her touch, but the heat only intensifies, and my heart rate increases tenfold. Every muscle in my body tenses and my teeth clench together so tightly, I expect them to shatter by the time this is over.

The witch wasn’t kidding when she said she was going to have to burn the curse out of me.

My veins are on fire and my lungs feel as though they’re filled with smoke. I want to open my eyes and make sure I’m not truly on fire, but I don’t dare change my position.

A war is waging within my body, and I can’t relent even the slightest.

Only the battle to maintain control is growing more fragile by the second.

If I were to look, I’m nearly certain that my skin is melting off right now, starting right at the tattoo. Sweat drips from my forehead, down my face, and continues over my chest and arms, so heavily that it might as well be raining on me.

I try to suck in a breath of fresh air, but it’s as if I’ve just swallowed a handful of pine needles. My throat screams in protest of the air I so desperately need but can’t seem to grasp.

“Quit fighting, Drake,” Natalia’s voice demands. “Release what’s inside you or you’re going to die.”

I don’t realize I’m fighting anything. I’m just trying to stay focused, but then it occurs to me that I’m fighting the pain when I’m probably supposed to succumb to the inferno growing within me.

Spencer’s face flickers in and out of my thoughts, and I don’t want to hurt her by showing how much this actually fucking hurts, but Natalia is right.

I can’t keep this contained any longer.

Dropping to my knees, I lean forward, digging my fingers into the earth beneath me, and throw my head back. My roar comes from deep within and the longer I make the guttural sound, the less the fire burns.

“Again, Drake!” the witch yells above my screams.

My rumbles are so loud that the ground under me begins to shake along with the rest of me, and my bones are aching from the weight of the curse that clings to every inch of me.

I couldn’t pinpoint the darkness before, but with the lightness of Natalia’s spell, the shadows stand out starkly within my mind, making me want to vomit.

“You’re almost there,” Natalia says calmer. “Just focus on what your heart wants.”

Instantly, I see the peaceful face of Spencer sleeping beside me. I may have only had one night with her, but there’s no doubt in my mind that my heart will never need anything ever again besides her.

My mate’s eyes flutter open in my mind, and when she smiles up at me, the world melts away. There’s no more agony within me, there’s only her.

Until I realize that’s only my imagination.

The fire within me changes, the burning stops and is replaced by an itching along my skin that reaches my bones until I feel like I’m coming out of my skin.

“Shift!” Natalia commands, and the memories of my wolf return to me.

This isn’t pain, this is power.

My wolf. He’s here and not just a flicker of my inner beast. The full force of his energy is wrapping around me and pushing outward. I can’t hold back any longer, and when I let him come forward, it’s as if my body explodes to the point of never being able to come back together again.

Screams echo around me, but I can’t tell where they’re coming from. The world is black, and I can’t feel anything other than pure anguish. No part of me is whole anymore. I can’t even feel the connection to Spencer that I’ve been blocking out.

Fuck! Spencer.

Panic takes the last of the breath I manage to inhale, and another deep roar leaves from somewhere within my body that I still can’t quite feel until there’s something lashing out at me, sending shockwaves through me.

My sensations slowly come back to me, and when I can open my eyes again, I’m still on all fours, but this time, there are paws beneath me instead of my arms and legs.

I search for my mate, both in person and inside me. As soon as my wolf’s eyes land on hers, we see tears streaking down her cheeks and her fists are resting against the shimmering shield meant to keep her safe.

Taking a deep breath, I draw on the bond I know is somewhere, yet hiding from me.

You shouldn’t have done that, a woman’s voice I won’t soon forget echoes through my mind. I’m going to find that little bitch of yours, and I’m going to force you to watch as I cut her body to pieces, inch by inch.

You won’t lay a hand on her, I snarl back to Kel. Killing her can’t happen soon enough.

She cackles, and the sound makes me want to vomit. I’ll do whatever I damn well please. You have no idea who I am.

I know you’re the creation of a demon, I snap back. An impure witch who should have died along with the rest of her coven.

There’s a brief quietness, and it’s almost as if I can feel her slithering around my mind. You’re going to regret ever saying that.

And then there’s nothing.

Kel’s presence is gone and, in the next beat, it’s replaced by the thrum of the bond I have with Spencer.

My wolf’s growls grow louder, and his teeth snap. He needs blood, and not just any blood. That fucking witch’s.