“I’m bored,”I say to Wren, falling back on the outdoor corner couch he’s sprawled out on.
It’s Saturday night, and Rachel’s backyard is full of half naked students, most wearing bikinis or swim shorts and fucking around in the heated in-ground pool in front of us. Usually, I’d be right there with them, being the life of the party. I’m not feeling it tonight. I mean, the group of girls checking me out look like they’d be a lot of fun, but none of them are her.
Callie’s dancing with Rachel over by the pool table, their hands linked in the air above their heads as they roll their hips to the music coming from the outdoor speakers. “CRACK MY SKULL” by jxdn. The song makes me think about Hailey. Again.
I check my phone, then glance over at the door. Nothing. She’s not coming.
Fuck, I really thought she might.
Damon’s leaning against the pool table with his arms crossed over his chest, staring at his wife as if she might disappear into thin air if he takes his eyes off her for even a second. I don’t know where Levi went, but I’m sure he’s not far considering Wren’s right here with me. He likes to watch what’s his as well.
When Wren doesn’t say anything, I look his way to find his head turned toward me, his brows dipped in thought as he runs his forefinger over the rim of the solo cup he’s holding.
“What?” I ask.
“You look like me tonight,” he says, making me snort because yeah, no shit.
“I look like you every night, Wren.”
“That’s not what I mean.” He turns to lie on his side, propping his head up on his hand to give me his full attention. “What’s wrong with you?”
I shrug.
“You’re quiet too,” he observes. “You look…” His brows dip. “Dude, you look sad.”
“I don’t get sad.” That’s not me. I’m not the sad brother. I’m the cocky one. The fun one. The one who makes people laugh and likes getting his dick wet. I’m the fuck boy, not…this.
“You been thinking about Mom today?”
“I think about her every day,” I say quietly.
“What’s wrong, Kai?”
“You got any weed left?” I ask, deflecting.
He shakes his head.
“Yo, Callie!” we holler at the same time.
She spins, grinning as she accepts the water bottle Damon’s waving in front of her face.
“Yes, boys?” Callie asks.
“Got any weed?”
“Always,” she teases, shoving her hand into the pocket of her jeans as she stumbles over to us.
“Are you drunk?” I ask, amused by the state of her hair and the fact that she can barely walk.
“Yeah.” She laughs. “Rachel taught me how to make a few cocktails. They were so good.”
“How many did you have?”
“I lost count. Big brother is mad,” she slurs, drawing out the last word. “I like him mad.” She adds conspiratorially, making us laugh.
Wren passes me the joint he’s rolled. I stick it between my lips to light it.
“What’s wrong, Kai?” Callie asks. “You look sad.”
“That’s what I said,” Wren agrees.
I roll my eyes at the both of them. “I’m not fucking sad. Jesus.”
Callie sticks her bottom lip out and pouts. Damn, she really is drunk. Our girl doesn’t pout.
After sharing a knowing look with Wren, she nods at him, smushes our faces together and kisses our heads, then walks back over to Damon and Rachel.
“I don’t need a babysitter, brother,” I grumble, but I don’t pull away from him, resting my head on his shoulder.
“You came to me,” he points out. Passing me the empty cup he’s holding so I can flick my ash into it, he asks, “Is it the coffee girl?”
I nod, rounding my lips to blow smoke rings, though I’m not as good at it as he is.
“I really thought she’d come. Dumb, right?”
“You like her,” he says. “Shit. You really like her, don’t you?”
I hum as her pretty smile invades my head. I wish she’d smile at me like that.
“Like I said.” I pass him the joint. “Dumb.”
I pull my phone out of my jeans and hold it up in front of my face. Still nothing. I text her because she’s turned me into a desperate fool.
Kai
What are you doing right now?
Five minutes go by, then ten, but she doesn’t respond. I know she’s seen it though. The girl’s leaving me on read. She’s so fucking mean.
I smile, then clench my jaw.
Fuck this little stabby feeling in my stomach.
When Levi and Ryan walk over holding two drinks each, Levi passes one to Wren and gestures for him to sit forward, tucking himself in behind him and pulling my brother back into his chest.
“You took forever,” Wren complains.
“Baby, I was five minutes.” Levi accepts the joint from his hand, takes a hit, and pulls his head back by his hair to shotgun it into his mouth.
Wren grins, and I look the other way.
So fucking lucky.
Ryan looks at me funny, and I raise a brow, spreading my legs and nodding at the space between them. “You wanna lie on me like that, my boy?”
He laughs, which makes me feel a little better about myself.
I’m the one who makes people laugh.
He takes a seat next to me, and I reach for one of the drinks he’s holding, but he pulls it back. “These are both mine,” he says, tipping his chin at the door. “Get out of here already.”
“What?”
“Why do you think Callie’s letting Rachel get her so fucked up tonight?” he asks, side-eyeing Damon, who’s still trying to pour water down Callie’s throat. “Go be with your girl while he’s occupied with his.”