Chapter 13
CHAPTER 13
ARICK
The drive to Orion’s place wasn't all that bad. Most of it was spent with us playing various car games. Sol tried to join in, though some of them were a bit too old school for him to truly understand. At the mention of VHS tapes, he decided to tap out for a short nap.
While he slept, Orion and I continued our games. It was reminiscent of our childhood, yet also firmly rooted in the present. There was no chance of me forgetting he was a big, sexy bodyguard now.
And fuck, was he sexy.
As I watched him drive, I noticed all the little things about him I hadn’t before. Like the scar behind his right ear. When I asked about it, he mentioned a mission where things got a bit dicey. He took a knife there, though thankfully it wasn’t too serious.
He’s also got some freckles along the back and side of his neck. They’re so light, it was almost impossible to see them without looking like a creeper.
Obviously, I hadn’t cared because I had no interest in the view outside the vehicle. All my focus was on the man beside me.
He held my attention like nothing else ever had. Nothing outside of chasing down leads to find my son.
But now that I had them both with me safe and sound, I was mesmerized. I felt balanced. Like everything was going right for once.
This attraction to my friend could turn out to be a problem. I didn't believe it would though.
I had seen the heat in his eyes. I had felt the passion behind that kiss. He wanted me as much as I wanted him.
There would be adjustments in our lives. For one, we were going to be living together, which created convenience for a relationship. It almost made me want to hold off until we had a place of our own because I didn't want things to be too perfect.
You know how when something feels very cookie-cutter and amazing at the start of meeting someone? People call it the honeymoon stage of a relationship. I think going straight to the part where we moved in together really amps up that feeling.
I wanted what we had to be real. I needed to know that no matter what came next, we could stick it out.
Never mind that it had been years since my last relationship. I didn't know how to do this anymore.
However, I would give it my all. Orion deserved to have someone just as committed as he was.
And sure, we would live together, which gave us easy access to one another, and we would be in each other's pockets. But it was also the fact that we could learn about the people we were now versus back then.
So much of the emotion I had attached to him was based upon how it felt to have him in my life two decades ago.
Though there were definitely present-day things that affected me, such as his looks and personality, his drive and attention to care, the way that he protected my son — which went the furthest in making me feel like he was a good person.
People's actions when you weren’t around spoke volumes.
Orion's shouted to me that he was a safe place, that he would always have my back and treat me like a partner.
When we pulled up to his brownstone, my jaw dropped. He hadn't even told me it was a brownstone until we were within the city limits. The confession should have been enough warning that he had money.
Not fuck you money, but enough money to make our previous home look more like a shack than a house.
“This is yours?” I asked him as we climbed out of the truck.
He leaned his forearms on the top and faced me. “It is. Are you going to make a big deal about it?”
I blinked at him owlishly.
“Who, me? I don't make a big deal out of things. I'm perfectly chalant. Or is it nonchalant? Whichever of those it is, that's what I am.”
He snorted a laugh, then motioned towards the back seat. "Why don't you get him out, and I'll go unlock the place. You can bring him in while I grab the bags. Deal?”
I was helpless to do anything but nod. I woke Sol up, though he was not happy about it. When he realized where we were, though, his mood improved greatly.
"This place is huge, Dad," he whispered not so discreetly.
Orion shook his head and mumbled, "Like father, like son."
As he passed us, I stopped partway up the stairs holding Sol's hand because even through the limited view of the front door that hung open, I could tell we were stepping into another universe.
It was the Wizard of Oz and Alice in Wonderland all in one.
Where we had been living paycheck to paycheck to make ends meet and for me to provide a safe environment for my son, Orion had a lavish home big enough to fit way more than I knew what to put in it.
When we made it inside, I noticed how beautifully decorated it was. It was simple and modern, but not the kind of modern that felt uncomfortable. It was the kind that was cozier, if you will.
He had pops of color around the place, a testament to his personality. A few pictures hung on the walls of him and the guys. I even saw some photos of his mom, though they looked more professionally done than candid.
When he noticed me looking at one, he shrugged bashfully. “I don't really have any photos with her anymore. I had to go based off things like newspaper clippings and yearbook photos. The family stuff disappeared after she died.”
I froze, not wanting to tell him that I knew exactly where everything was. Would he be upset with me for holding on to it all this time?
Surely not.
He had to understand that I had no clue where he was. It wouldn't have been possible for me to get it to him.
While I could go ahead and tell him right this minute, it felt like it was too big a secret to unveil the first day we arrived. Plus, I could use it later as a gift or something. Maybe a get out of jail free card.
I didn't think I would need that type of thing, but one never knew. Like I said, he and I didn't know each other well yet. I didn't want to do anything that would jeopardize this new thing we had going on.
Orion set our bags down in the living room and waved his arms around.
"This is our home," he said as if it was not an earth-shattering type of sentence.
Our home.
Home.
Two words, each with powerful meanings.
Ours, which symbolized it was not just his, but mine and Sol's too. It gave us ownership of something we had no stake in, that we had not bought into or furnished or anything.
And then home, well, it meant far more than I could even describe. It was, in my opinion, more than a building. It was a place that felt safe and secure, a place you felt loved.
Sol had always been my home. It's why I packed up everything we had, sold what needed to be sold, and hit the road when he went missing. There was nothing about that place that I needed to keep to feel like it was home.
It's why I didn't need to go back either.
Orion shrugged off the silence that we sent back his way. I think he realized how overwhelmed we felt.
He turned towards the stairs. "You two, follow me. We're going to go up, and I'll show you your rooms."
Apparently, his brownstone was four stories high. The second held the kitchen area and dining room. The third floor was for the master bedroom and a small guest bedroom. The top floor was a surprisingly large open concept space with a small bedroom area off to one side.
He had bookshelves and trinkets lining one wall. The bed looked as if it had been recently purchased. I mean, the tags hanging off it were a clear indicator. I pointed to them and raised a brow his way. Meanwhile, Sol was already off digging into the books and toys across the room.
"When did you have time to buy a bed and set it up?" I half-whispered, half-shouted.
He grinned at me. "It's amazing what you can do when you have an entire team of people wanting to help you. The minute the guys dropped you off and apparently saw the look I gave you; they decided they wanted to help. They told me they would take care of everything.”
“I thought your phone was turned off. That's what Memphis said.”
He rolled his eyes. “Memphis was so bitchy about it. Yes, I turned my phone off to get some privacy so I could focus on Sol. The minute I turned it back on, though, they were up my ass about it. When I confirmed you were coming back with me, they stepped in to get this place ready, came in, cleaned it out, bought food. You know the drill.”
I didn't know the drill.
I had never had anyone in my life who was that way outside of his mother. And that was years ago.
Sol and I had been on our own. My father had never attempted to take care of me in my young life. I knew how to cook and clean before I could properly write my name.
"Sol, buddy. I'm going to take your dad to his room now," he said.
Sol waved his arm in acknowledgement. He found a puzzle and was spreading it out on the floor.
I chuckled. "How did you know he was obsessed with the things?"
Orion turned to me and said, “When he first came around, he didn't talk much, but I watched him like a hawk. I saw the way he eyed certain things or when people would say specific words, how he would light up. I made a list in my phone, tracking it all so that whenever I was ready to come back, I would have it.
When the guys said that they would get the house ready, I agreed mostly for you and him, but also under the condition that they bought some of the recreational things as well. Kids shouldn't have to come to a home that doesn't have things they like in it. It's not fair, especially when he has two fully capable adults taking care of him.”
My chest felt like it was on fire. Was I having a heart attack? Is this a stroke?
Oh God, maybe heart failure.
“ Breathe Arick,” Orion said forcefully, his hands grabbing my shoulders. He stood in front of me, his eyes locked on mine. “Breathe, baby. It's all okay, I'm right here.”
The panic had only just begun, so I pushed it back down and shook my head.
“I don't know what the fuck that just was,” I admitted as his thumbs rubbed against my shirt.
That simple movement had me off-kilter.
“I think you may have panicked at all the things we did. I know the team can be a bit much. We tend to give it our all when we find someone that we like, whether that's friendship or more. Considering you've fallen into both categories, it’s…” He took a deep breath. “It's a lot. I'm not going to apologize for it because you deserve to know what it's like to be cared for. You deserve to be loved and doted on. Sol is not the only person that deserves good things.”
He was so earnest in his plea. While I did believe him, I also knew that it wasn't always the case for people like me. There were times in my life when things went well, but there were also times when it was a shit show.
“Alright, enough of me and my panic, show me to my room.”
His smirk returned as he bounded down the stairs, waiting for me to follow. I went back the way we had come originally and started to head towards the guest room.
He stopped me and then tugged me in the opposite direction. He headed to the one he had said was the master bedroom.
When we stepped through the doorway, he pulled me in front of him. His arms wrapped around my waist and his chin went to my shoulder. I put my hands over his and tilted my head back, giving him access to my neck.
He didn't do anything other than breathe me in. It was like he was soaking up our connection.
“I would love it if you would stay here with me. I know it's forward and probably a bit too soon. But the thought of you anywhere else but safe in my arms terrifies me. With Sol right upstairs, I know he's safe.”
While a part of me wanted to say yes immediately, I had to take a step back to think of everything rationally. Was this the best decision for us? I was already contemplating everything about this new relationship in the car ride over.
How could I jump straight into living with him and sleeping in his bed?
I knew people said this was the way that some folks found love and forever. They met and it's an instant attraction, then three weeks later, they're married at the courthouse.
I didn't knock anyone who has experienced this in real life. It's a very valid situation for a lot of people. But I couldn't believe it was something that I would get to experience.
"What's the biggest hurdle for you?" he asked me.
I bit my lip, then decided to go with the truth. “It feels like it's just too fast, you know? We just met. It's been a couple of days.”
His entire body went rigid.
“It hasn't been a few days, Arick. It's been years. I might not have understood how I felt as a child when it was just my best friend I cared about. But I'm a grown-ass man now. I know what I'm feeling isn't normal. I understand that being around you and your son feels like I finally have a family again. There's no timeline for right or wrong for this. Nothing about it is instant because from the minute we were separated, all I could think about was getting back to you and my mom. And once I got out and found out my mom was okay, you remained an integral part of my life. I told myself that I was trying to find you for the sake of finding my friend again and that I wanted to let you know that I was okay. I wanted to see how your life had turned out and make sure that your father got what he deserved. But now that you're here and I've found you, it's so much more. You feel like home. That's why this works. That's why I want you here. Because letting you go is an unacceptable option.”
I couldn't breathe. His words moved me in a way that I've never experienced. I believed everything he said.
Orion had never lied to me. And though people could change, at his core, he was still the same boy I knew.
“A trial run,” I blurted out. “We'll do a trial run with me here. But if it doesn't work or it's too much for Sol or anything goes wrong, I go to the guest room. Deal?”
He smiled, but it wasn't as big and as bright as his others. He was accepting the limitations I put in place. And for that, I was thankful.
“A trial period,” he agreed. “When the trial is up, you're all mine.”
It felt like an ominous warning. I wasn't quite sure what would happen before the trial ended. But I knew when that time was up, he would be ready to stake his claim in my life.