Cocky Choices: Zoe Cocker (Cocker Brothers #30)

12. Zoe

TWELVE

Zoe

I stumble onto the street, heart racing and breath coming in quick, shallow gasps. Lexi’s question still echoes in my ears.

I hear my cousins chasing me, but their words are a blur.

She had shouted to the whole restaurant, “Are you no longer a virgin?!” the words cutting deeper than I would have expected them to. I can still feel the stares of strangers boring into me, their curiosity humiliating.

“Zoe! Wait up!” Samantha’s voice cuts through my haze, “Stop! Please Zoe, she’s sorry!” growing louder as Sam and Lexi chase after me. I push myself to run faster, my heels pounding against the pavement like a frantic drumbeat. I just want to escape, to hide from the embarrassment, but I can’t seem to shake them off.

As I round a corner, I hear Tom’s voice shout, “Zoe! Wait!”

What is he doing here? I look behind me and catch sight of Tom and his sister Elena running behind my cousins though his long legs have almost caught up. Their expressions are a mix of surprise and concern. Just the sight of him makes my heart skip in confusion and…relief? But wait.

Oh no.

Was he there?

Did he hear what Lexi said?

Why is he chasing me, too?

I want to die!

I want to crawl into a cave where no one can find me, and die!

But what would happen to Ralphie?

“Leave me alone!” I shout, and keep running.

“Zoe!” Tom calls out and I can tell by how much louder he is, he’s gaining on me, “Please stop! Talk to me! What happened?” I feel a hand grab my arm. “Stop, Zoe!” he pleads with me.

My heels clatter to an exhausted jog, then slow to stopping, hand flying to my heart as I catch my breath. “Were you there?” I whisper, gasping for air. “Did you hear her, too?”

“Hear what?”

“Hear Lexi!”

“No, Tom was in the patio, Zoe! We saw them run out!” Lexi reassures me as she, Sam and Elena join us, all of them catching their breath, too. “He didn’t hear me. He wasn’t inside!”

Tom asks me imploringly, “What did I miss? What’s got you so upset? Let me help!”

With a frown embedded, Elena cautiously demands, “Tell us what we missed!”

Lexi says, “Zoe was going to tell us something important and I...”

I point to Lexi. “Don’t say a word!”

She blinks, swallowing her words to offer a vague, “…I thought it was on a different subject.”

Samantha steps closer and tells the siblings, “It was family stuff, personal, you guys understand,” and I want to kiss her for lying.

Elena processes Sam’s words with an expression that betrays her doubt, but Tom accepts it and cuts to the topic that caught his attention, asking me, “What were you going to tell them that was important?”

I take a deep breath, feeling the heat of embarrassment still burning in my cheeks. “It’s… it’s nothing,” I mutter, worried that telling Tom about my new fiancé status will be hard, though I don’t want to admit why. And I never will! It doesn’t matter that I have a crush on Tom. I’m putting that behind me. They’re all staring at me, waiting, and I want to stop time, but the truth spills out before I can stop it. “I just got engaged.”

“What?” Elena blurts, clearly caught off guard.

My cousins are stunned into silence.

“I’m engaged,” I repeat, my heart pounding. “To a man I just met. I agreed to it.” The words feel surreal as they leave my lips, but there’s a strange sense of relief in finally saying it out loud to someone other than Ralphie. “He’s very handsome and comes from a highly respectable family. He said I could bring light into his life. He’s very wealthy and I think the money and status has stopped him from enjoying his…well… life ! So, I said yes. I’m getting married.”

Tom’s expression is beyond somber. I watched his face as I gushed out all of what I just said. With each sentence the higher his wall went up. I don’t even recognize his voice as he asks without emotion, “Zoe, are you sure about this?”

Lexi and Sam are staring at me, still speechless.

“I am,” I insist, looking from one to the other, my voice steady. “I want a companion, someone to share my life with. I’m tired of waiting and hoping for something that may never come.”

“Shit,” Elena mutters.

Lexi whispers, “You said yes ?”

“I did.”

“Some wealthy handsome guy asked you to marry him right after you met him?”

“Yes.”

“And you said yes ,” she blinks.

“Zoe, this is a huge decision,” Samantha chimes in, tone cautious like I might start running again if she says the wrong thing. “You don’t even know this guy.”

“People used to have arranged marriages and they never knew each other until the wedding day!”

“But the families knew them,” Samantha reminds me.

“I know enough,” I shoot back, my frustration bubbling to the surface. “I’m ready to take this leap. It’s my life, and I make my own choices.”

“What did your brothers say?” Samantha asks me with warning in her tone.

Lexi finally catches up, her laughter ringing in my ears. “This is amazing! You’re really going to marry someone you just met? You did it! You kept your fucking promise!”

“Stop it, Lexi!” Samantha snaps, clearly irritated by her sister, though why she would be I don’t know. Lexi is a wild child and has always been — why wouldn’t Lexi celebrate that in others?

Celebrate that in…me.

Tom shifts on his feet, “What promise?” gaze steady but his expression unreadable to me. I suddenly catch a flicker of something in his eyes — concern, maybe? Or is it something deeper? I can’t quite place it, but I have a small shiver down my spine. What is going on? What is he thinking?

Samantha starts to speak but Lexi barrels over her, “I told Zoe to take a chance when it comes to love. I told her to do something wild.”

“Like what she did,” I tell him, adding to them all. “And that worked out great for you!”

Samantha gasps, “Zoe, it’s just…this is marriage!”

“So?”

“So…it’s forever. Right?”

Tom starts coughing and steps away from us. I reach over and touch his back. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” he chokes. “Just got something down the wrong pipe.”

“Oh, I hate that,” I whisper, rubbing his back.

“Look, Zoe,” he says, stepping away from my touch, hesitating as if searching for the right words. “If you’re happy, that’s what matters, I guess. But just… think this through, okay?”

“I’m thinking, Tom!” I say, my voice sharper than intended. “I’ve thought about it more than you know. I’m tired of being the joke, the girl who waits around for someone. He took a chance, asked me, and I guess his timing was just really good because I…want a companion. I want someone of my own. Someone who sees me.”

Elena glances between us and groans, “Oh man.”

“What?” I ask her.

Lexi grins, “Well, if you’re engaged, we should celebrate! Let’s grab some ice cream or something. A toast to Zoe’s new adventure!”

I can’t help but smile at her enthusiasm. “That sounds great.” Looking at Samantha I tilt my head, hoping she’ll stop looking so worried and just be happy for me. “Doesn’t it, Sam? Please celebrate with me.”

Her gaze rises from the gum-dotted sidewalk, brow clearing. “I’m here for you.”

Stretching my shoulders I smile, “Good. Let’s all get some ice cream.” On a nervous laugh I add, “I could use something sweet right now.”

Tom stays quiet, jaw tight. It’s like I can feel the weight of his thoughts, unspoken words hanging in the air like a storm cloud. It’s unsettling, and for a moment, I wonder what’s really going on with him. If he’s this worried about me, that means he truly is a friend. Those who worry, care .

As we begin to walk, I notice Tom falling a step behind. I glance back at him, but he’s staring off into the distance, expression clouded. I can’t shake that there’s something in his silence which makes my heart ache a little.

“Tom?” I call softly, and he looks up. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” he replies quickly.

As we head towards the ice cream shop, I glance over at Tom again. I’ve never seen his eyes so stormy. They’re usually so warm, so open and unguarded.

I push the thought aside, focusing on the excitement of my announcement. This is what I need — someone to share my life with, even if it’s a companionship and never turns into more. I can’t shake the feeling, though, that I’m leaving something important behind, something I can’t quite put my finger on.

“I’m going to be okay, Tom.”

He returns, voice low and somber, “I know you will, Zoe.”

Smiling, I face forward and take Lexi’s hand. “Thank you for pushing me to take a chance.”

“Boy, you took one!” she laughs, squeezing my fingers lightly.

I take Samantha’s hand, too, and House Three walks together toward a future unknown to us.

Samantha inhales sharply. “Your brothers…”

“Let’s not think about that now,” Lexi says.

I counter, “They’ll support me.”

Lexi barks, “Ha!”

And I glance to her, “You don’t think so?”

“We’ll see, Zoe.”

Samantha offers, “Maybe?”

Under her breath, Elena mutters, “The timing of this...”

I glance back to her, “Timing?”

Elena starts to speak but Tom interrupts her, “ Timing will help your brothers understand.”

Elena’s mouth shuts as she shoots him a look. Glancing to me, she shrugs, “Yep! That’s what I meant.”

“Ice cream for everyone on me!” Lexi shouts, jumping once before reaching for the shop door.

Tom reaches out, long arms holding it open for us all to walk through before him. I smile, “Thank you, Tom.”

“Anything for you, Zoe.”