Chapter Six
Alaina
I t’s strange being back here. Not everything about it is as I remember. Although, as a child, I often thought this place was magical. It was the first time I’ve felt power radiate from its depths. The first place I felt that the Moon Goddess was with me.
Another difference is the bittersweet nostalgia I now get from visiting what growing up was my go-to place to paint. I wanted to show Dax this, but now I never will.
The last difference is—
Goddess, something stinks.
Mate! My wolf alerts me.
My wolf must be losing it because whatever smells of death is not our mate.
Mate is here!
What?
It’s like watching a horror film. My heart thumps, mouth parts, and I slowly scan my surroundings. My wolf senses what smells like a rotting corpse.
A corpse. That’s what it smells like. Am I about to find my mate’s dead body?
“Sam!” I scream, and my voice echoes throughout the dome.
Finally able to pinpoint the stench, I notice it’s coming from the deepest, darkest part of the cave. The stacked rocks create a wall that, in my youthful years, became a prime place for me to hide behind until I could jump out and scare Caleb.
I should wait until Sam gets here , but like a scary movie, I can’t look away, even when everything inside me is telling me not to. Cautiously, I continue to creep closer, and my heart beats like a drum.
“What’s wrong?”
Sam’s voice causes me to jump.
I whip around to face him. “Do you smell that?”
“Yeah.” He sniffs. “What the hell is that? Is that you ?” Sam covers his nose.
I punch his shoulder.
“Ow!”
“I’m serious. What does that smell like to you?”
Sam’s eyes point toward the collection of rocks I was viewing before, his eyes flashing gold in recognition.
“A dead body.” His jaw clenches.
Our facial expressions speak a language only he and I can understand.
All this time, I wished for closure, to let his body finally rest, and now I’m not so sure I want it. Not if this is the outcome. Not if it ends my ability to live in denial. It’s too final.
As I approach the rocks, the odor burns my nose. The buzzing of flies reaches my ears. I take a deep breath before rounding the corner.
My stomach drops. I cover my mouth and gasp.
Mate.
Dax lies on his back, his head turned away from us, but I’d recognize his body anywhere. Flies buzz around him, dropping on his still body. His normal smell that would allow me to pick him out anywhere was covered under the guts, blood, and dirt on him.
I hesitate to run to him. Is he alive?
“Dax?”
My voice shakes.
No movement. No response. And I can’t tell if he’s breathing. I have to get closer.
Sam and I exchange glances. I suck in my bottom lip, biting down on it.
I creep forward toward my mate, and my heart revives at the rise and fall of his chest.
“He’s still breathing!”
“What?” Sam echoes, scrambling to me.
“Dax!” I drop to my knees, grabbing his face.
His lids are closed, mouth parted.
Tears well up in my eyes until they fall and streak his dirt-covered cheek.
“Dax, honey, I’m here!” I rub his forehead.
Sam puts his hand on Dax’s wrist, checking his pulse.
“His pulse is faint, but it’s there. We need to get him to the doctor. Now!”
Sam starts to snake his hands under his body.
I reach out, grabbing his wrists.
“Wait,” I demand.
Sam stops.
“We can’t move him. We don’t know what injuries he has.”
Sam exhales. “What do you suggest we do?”
The infirmary where the pack doctor would be is a few miles away from here. Jemma’s was only a mile or so away and so were our warriors that came with us.
I haven’t tried it yet, but if it works, I should still be able to mindlink Caleb since Dax and I haven’t completed the mate bond. He could make sure the pack doctor meets us at Jemma’s, and Sam can tell the warriors to come help us carry Dax as quickly and carefully as possible. The less movement he experiences, the better. “Caleb! It’s Dax! We found him! Have the pack doctor get my room ready for him.”
I stay as calm as I can, but I’m shaking.
“Shit, you serious?” Caleb sounds as shocked as I am. “I got you.”
I close the mindlink. “We’re going to need some help. Notify the guys to come meet us at about a mile north from Jemma’s. Tell them how to get to the cave.”
Sam’s eyes glaze over to communicate my orders before closing the mindlink. “They’ll be here in about two minutes.”
I rub his arm, careful not to move him anymore than I already shouldn’t have. I wouldn’t have recognized him if it weren’t for our bond. It was the only way I could’ve come for him.
My mate , my wolf whimpers.
Sniffles fill the air. Sam rubs his watery eyes on his shirt, staring down at Dax.
“Sam.”
His teary eyes meet mine. We pull each other into an embrace, sobbing. Today, not only has a queen found her king, but a beta has found his alpha. Lovers and best friends reuniting finally, our family was whole again.
* * *
The warriors arrived with a stretcher in hand and carried Dax with ease and caution. Once at Jemma’s, they eased him up the creaking hardwood steps to my childhood bedroom. My room had been turned into an infirmary with the addition of a hospital bed, an IV, medical kits, and a nursing staff.
Nurses and doctors frantically move in a blur, communicating with each other in jargon I don’t understand. My eyes stay trained on him as they hook him to an IV, check his levels, giving him blood. All I can do is watch, wishing he’d wake up so I could see his caramel eyes I’ve missed so much.
Sam and I were encouraged to step outside—at least I think we were. We’re both in too much shock to process anything. Next thing I knew, we were no longer looking at Dax on the hospital bed but the door to the outside of my childhood bedroom.
* * *
Sam and I have been slumped to the floor in the hallway for several hours until, finally, the door opens. Nurses clear out, bow their heads to me, and leave. Sam stands, holding out his hand to help me up. I take his offer and also stand, then let him guide me into the room.
The pack doctor is checking Dax’s vitals, using his stethoscope to listen to him. Two nurses clean up the stacks of blood bags, used needles, and other medical equipment thrown throughout the commotion.
Sam and I walk slowly toward Dax, who lies unconscious in the hospital bed. What was once a room filled with chaos and noise is now eerily silent and somber save for beeping machines.
“How is he?”
The doctor hangs his stethoscope back around his neck.
“He’s stable for now. We’re monitoring him closely. We’ve got him on fluids and some medicine for the pain. Now all we can do is wait.”
My mind whirls, still trying to take everything in.
“Will he wake up?” Sam asks.
“He’s strong, but only time will tell. For now, he needs lots of rest.”
We thank the doctor, and he leaves. I pull a wooden desk chair up next to the hospital bed, then cup his hand in mine. I kiss the back of his hand, and the tears start pouring. Sam’s eyes move from the heart monitor, then slide to Dax.
I look up at the ceiling, silently praying he pulls through.
Not sure if he can hear me, but I try to mindlink him anyway. “Please wake up.”
No response.
I shake my head and wipe my tears. “I’m not getting anything from him.”
Sam squeezes my shoulder from behind. “You heard the doctor. Dax is strong.”
“He was here this whole time, and I didn’t even know.”
“You had no way of knowing. Without you, no one would’ve found him. You might’ve just saved his life.”
Even if that were true, it isn’t enough to make up for everything else I’ve done.
Please, Goddess, if you let him pull through this, I promise I’ll never question you again.
Sam sits on my childhood bed across the room, while I remain at Dax’s side, fluffing his pillow and holding his hand. Sam relays messages he receives from the mindlink that require my approval and response.
I’ve succumbed to emotional exhaustion after all the stress, having to force myself to care about mundane questions. It’s weird how the world continues to turn for others even though yours has stopped and how minuscule every problem really is when your loved one is lying in a hospital bed.
A nurse enters the room, drawing the blinds, but I get a glimpse of the moon before it closes.
How long have we been in here?
Sam puts his snoozing on hold to argue with the sight of a young attractive female nurse.
“It’s getting late, and visiting hours are over,” a young nurse says, looking down and chuckling.
She likely drew the short straw out of who gets to kick the royal beta out of the hospital room of his king.
“This isn’t a hospital. I’m sure it’s fine,” he contests smoothly, using his charm.
“I’m sorry, sir, but the doctor said only immediate relatives and his mate can stay.”
Sam opens his mouth to attempt to sweet talk her again—
“He’s Dax’s brother and, therefore, mine,” I say.
“Of course, Your Majesty.” The nurse smiles at me and curtsies before speedwalking out of the room.
“Thank you,” Sam says.
“Don’t mention it.”
The air thickens between us, the silence awkward. It seems neither of us are very good at expressing our feelings.
“Alright, so sleeping arrangements... What’s the plan?” I ask.
“I’ll sleep here.” Sam points to my childhood bed. “You’ll sleep with Dax.”
He walks toward Dax, folds back the sheets on the bed, lifts Dax’s arm, and pats the space next to him. Despite my wolf practically leaping to him, I carefully crawl on the bed, trying my hardest not to fuss with the wires.
“After my mother was attacked by a vampire, she laid in a hospital bed for days while my father and I waited for her to recover. The doctors told my father to lie in the hospital bed with her. They said that having your mate near can help foster healing.” Sam fluffs the pillows surrounding Dax and me.
“You sure this is okay? I don’t want to hurt him.”
Sam nods. “There are only a few ways you could hurt him. Being by his side isn’t one of them.”
He pulls the sheet over Dax and me after I’m situated.
“If you need me—”
“Just scream. I know. Thank you.”
“Good night, Alaina.”
“Good night, Sam.”
* * *
The crackling of thunder followed by a flash of lightning assists in pulling me out of my slumber —not that I was sleeping all that well anyway. I am worried about Dax, afraid I’ll miss him waking up.
I don’t remember dozing off, but I couldn’t forget my dream.
Yin and yang, his black wolf with my white one running through the dark forest. Once we reach our destination, we shift, entering the cave I longed to take him to, with the stars from the night sky in the dome’s opening twinkling above us. Dancing rays of light reflect from the pool of water onto the cave walls as the only illumination.
Dax struts toward me in his naked form, causing warmth to rush through me.
My dream turns into a nightmare at the flashing of his lifeless body in the cave.
I thought having Dax back with me would finally yield good sleep. I’m wide awake, and I’ve never felt more exhausted. Now, instead of losing sleep over him being gone, I now lose sleep with the fear of ever losing him again.
I may never sleep again.
As a kid, storms scared me. But lying here with Dax, listening to the rain pelt the roof and windows, I know now I could weather any storm with him by my side, making all my silly childhood fears seem like child’s play.
Dax’s mouth is parted, a tube hanging from his mouth, and the beeping sounds are scarier than the storm outside my bedroom window. His chest rises with his breath and falls abruptly like a deflated balloon.
“Alaina!” Caleb panics through the mindlink.
Thunder cracks, and light flashes through the room again.
I gasp and jolt up from the hospital bed, my heart racing.
“What? What’s happening?” I respond frantically.
“They’re raiding our homes.”
“Who is?”
“Rogues. Vampires. It’s a horde of them.”
My eyes bug.
Bloodhound isn’t prepared to take on a horde. They didn’t train like Crescent. They’ve never had to. With the pack’s link to sources of food, no one wanted Bloodhound as an enemy. If I survive this, I note a need for more serious training to commence in Bloodhound during my reign.
“Alaina.”
I could practically hear Caleb’s vein pop and the grinding of his teeth.
“ They’re killing pups.”
Covering my mouth with my hand, I close the mindlink.
I hurry to Sam, who’s curled up on my childhood bed and snoring.
“Sam! Wake up!”
Sam jumps and turns over to face me.
“What’s wrong?” He rubs his eyes.
With Sam awake, I start searching my room. “They’re attacking the cabins surrounding the Hunter’s Quarters. My people are dying. I have to go.”
Where would it be?
I’m scouring through my dresser drawers, but it’s not here. Everything’s empty from when Dax moved all my things. Unless... I cross the room to my closet.
“I’ll go with you.” Sam stands from the bed.
“No. I need you here, protecting Dax. Mindlink Crescent pack for me, let those here know what’s happening. I’ll take a few warriors with me, but I want the rest overlooking the cabin, making sure no one gets in.”
I hate having to leave Dax so soon. I just got him back. But I could lose him again if I don’t go now.
“They’re after you . You should stay here where it’s safe, I’ll go.”
When I open my closet door, I see Jemma has taken over my closet.
Ah, found it. Thank you, Jemma.
“That’s exactly why I need to go,” I argue. “If I stay here, Dax isn’t safe.”
I pull off one of Jemma’s silky lilac robes from its hanger, hold it up to inspect it, and chuck it at Sam.
He catches it with one hand.
I may be queen, but I’m still under Jemma’s roof, and she would have my head if I was gallivanting about, naked. “Have this ready for me when I get back.” I jog toward my bedroom door, then stop to glance back at Sam. “Until then, don’t leave Dax’s side.”
Sam nods. “You have my word. And Alaina.”
I hold his gaze.
He swallows. “Be safe.”
With a nod, I bolt out the room, down the stairs, and out the front door.
Warriors surround Jemma’s home, with the exception of a few crowding outside the door, seeming to wait for me. Sam must’ve followed my orders to make them aware.
“No one gets into this cabin. Sam is the last line of defense. Only way Sam should have to fight anyone is because you all died. Am I clear?” I shout over the rain.
“Yes, Your Majesty,” the guards say in unison.
I turn my attention toward the few warriors. “Let’s go,” Nodding in the direction of the Hunter’s Quarters, I shift and take off, with the warriors tailing me.
Screams and snarls emanate from the area before the warm lights from the cabin windows come into view between the brush of the trees. I’ve led them to the scene of a massacre. Pounding closer, I see wolves and vampiric shadows project their fights to the death against the cabin walls.
Vampires tear the front doors off homes before storming in to drag families through the threshold. The cobblestone, which would normally serve as a place of celebration before the fields, has become a graveyard for my fallen packmates.
The Goddess’s tears coat my fur, but it’s not the reason I’m shaking.
Tiny barks come from behind a mother wolf shielding her pup from four vampires, who’ve cornered them against the wall. Not everyone trains in this pack. Her own stamina is what’s allowed her to last this long. The mother is brave, and judging by the missing chunks of fur, she’s fought hard. But these vampires were looking to slaughter.
I hope they’re looking for me more.
I hasten to levels I wasn’t aware I could meet. My growl echoes over the vigor of thunder, and my warriors follow in snarls.
Just as I hoped, the vampires immediately take the bait, turning their attention from the defenseless pup and his mother to my violet beams. My ears are erect and point forward, baring my teeth.
Come and get me.
Right on cue, the Goddess’s forsaken demons charge for us. An intense burst of energy courses through me, ready to demolish and avenge.
I’m snorting and snarling through the thrill of locking in on our prey. My small army clashes into theirs, but I don’t slow down, I plow through. I want to bathe in the vampire’s blood and bask in their screams longer, but silence befalls after a vile, hollow crunching of cracking bone and squelching of torn flesh.
Who’s next?
Up ahead, two vampires circle Luna Kathy’s wolf. Blood is mixed in with the fur on her leg. If it weren’t for the bleeding wound, I couldn’t tell she was hurt. With her teeth bared, ears back, fur standing up, her nonverbals screamed, Don’t fuck with me!
For Caleb, “don’t tell Dad” was seldom—and more often was “don’t tell Mom.” Luna Kathy was always such a warm presence, so it isn’t until moments like these where someone’s pissed her off that I’m reminded why. It never failed to surprise me seeing her in such a predatorial vision.
She doesn’t attack them. She doesn’t move from the spot she’s in, even as they circle her. It isn’t until she leans a certain way to snarl at one of the vampires who gets too close that I see why.
She’s protecting a pup.
A pup whose mother is lying on the ground, howling in pain. From the looks of it and the smell of her, she’ll survive her injuries, but she is in no shape to fight or protect her pup. The vampires must’ve tried to take out the mother first before going for the pup, and that’s when Luna Kathy must’ve stepped in.
The vampires hiss at her. They’re closing in.
“I’m going to get their attention. Whichever one turns their attention from you, you kill. I’ve got the other,” I mindlink to my luna.
She snaps her jaws at one of the vampires.
“I’m ready when you are,” she says.
Deep from within, I let out a growl, and only one of the vampires turn around to look my way. I prowl toward their direction, and Luna Kathy takes him out before he has a chance to react.
The other vampire is too arrogant to pay me any mind, a mistake that will cost him his life.
As Luna Kathy lunges for the vampire first, the other uses that opportunity to go for the pup. Hissing, his fangs are inches from the pup cowering in fear. The pup yelps as he draws near.
Before the vampire can get his fangs on him, I tackle and pin him to the ground with my size. I let my claws elongate, piercing his skin. Opening my jaws wide, I tilt my head to the side to clamp my teeth around either side of his neck. As I chomp down, I pull as I straighten my head, decapitating him. Blood pours out of his lifeless body.
The mother thanks us through the mindlink and shifts upon the arrival of the aids from the infirmary hauling a stretcher. The mother is tended to, and Luna Kathy and I stand guard to make sure the medical team can see to her without the looming threat of fatal interruption. Once they ready her, they quickly move her onto the stretcher. Another aid takes the hand of the pup and walks alongside them. Taking them both to safety.
“Thank you,” Luna Kathy says.
Thanks wasn’t needed. So, instead of responding, I ask her where her mate and son are.
Just as I do, Alpha Jack and Caleb are each pushing a female vampire out of the home. They try their best to push the vampires to fight outside and away from the safety and proximity of pups. They can’t shift as easily into their wolf form due to the size of the doorway.
Somehow, the vampires knew this, which makes sense as to why they decided to attack when most would be in their homes. They’d be most vulnerable that way. The stairs to the porch weren’t helping them gain any leverage. But the vampires are fighting back against them.
Seeming to have the same thought, her and I both speed toward them. I reach them first.
“Mine to kill,” Luna Kathy claims.
“You got it.” I prowl up the stairs, bite the back of the vampire who’s pushing back against Caleb, and toss her behind me.
She tumbles down the porch steps, right into Luna Kathy’s awaiting jaws. I do the same to the next, throwing the vampire at the angry wolf mama behind me from her mate. As Luna Kathy shreds flesh off the screaming female like a lion feasting on a gazelle, the most colorful words I’ve ever heard of hers seep through the mindlink.
Although unable to mindlink the warriors, the two packs come to quickly fall into a rhythm after witnessing our teamwork. Their collaboration is flawless, as the Bloodhound wolves do their best to toss the vampires out of their window or doors. Whichever the natives are able to shove the vampire out of first, into the jaws of the Crescent warriors who wait outside the homes.
Under Alpha Jack’s training, Bloodhound was more than capable of clearing a home by hunting for their intended prey. Whereas, Dax had Crescent pack well-trained in demolition.
One by one, the two packs begin clearing each house swiftly without experiencing further casualties. The only flaw to this assembly line is the disproportionate ratio of warriors to vampires. The vampires have infested the homes at impeccable rates and more are being hunted, tossed, and dragged out of the home than my warriors and Luna Kathy are able to dispose of.
That’s where I come in. Unmatched, my speed becomes the next line of defense. Any vampires who manage to escape my warriors aren’t able to outrun me.
One of the larger of the cabins is being cleared. Four, five, six are tossed out. Two of them get away and run straight in the direction of Jemma’s cabin. They don’t make it very far before I’ve chased them down and murder them.
Everything is going well until, all of the sudden, the cabin shakes from upstairs, where we’ve yet to clear. Members from Bloodhound pack come running out of the house, jumping off the porch railing and into the bushes, and yelling to take cover.
What’s happening? Is there a bomb?
I bark to Crescent and mindlink to Bloodhound for everyone to take cover. I back away from the home, listening to it crack and tremble.
Is it going to collapse?
It’s then vampires pour out of the home all at one time. I wasn’t expecting the ambush, but I did expect they would attack us all as we stand here. Instead, they breeze past us, not engaging with anyone.
At first, I don’t chase after them and watch thinking they’re retreating to the woods. But when they don’t turn in that direction, my heart falls into my stomach.
They’re heading straight for Jemma’s.
Mate, I whimper.
My mind reels. Do they know he’s there? And if they do, how did they know? Could they smell him on me? Did someone see us rescue him? Is there a rat among us I don’t know about?
Concern and adrenaline fuel my speed as I chase after the vampires. With wind breezing past me, I howl in hopes the wind carries my warning to the guards to prepare their interception. The others follow me.
As worried as I am, I’m more pissed than anything at the audacity and tenacity of these vampires. Killing pups—now they’re after the king of wolves? My king?
Something snaps inside me, and a darkness infects my moral compass, flooding my bloodstream. With my immune system compromised, I take inventory. My ability to take the high road is gone. Sparing the lives of others? Gone. My perspective on what’s right and what’s necessary is forever altered.
I no longer care to be the hero. I want to be the villain.
Upon arrival at Jemma’s quaint cabin, her manicured front lawn—thanks to her gardening skills—is riddled with walking vermin. The bloodsuckers reached the guards, who’ve shifted and are standing firm on tossing and striking any of those who get too close.
Implementing the same tactics, I push through the crowd, pulling them out and away from them clawing and biting their way past my guards. I want to make sure the ones blocking the door have as much backup and reinforcement as needed. I don’t want to fight from the outside in but kill from the inside out to stand between my mate and these fuckers.
Like bodyguards at a concert, Alpha Jack and Caleb help cover me until I arrive at the front door and turn to face the horde that threatens the safety of my mate.
I’m going to kill every single one of them.
From a bird’s-eye view, I can only imagine it looks like shepherds herding sheep away from Jemma’s cabin—if the shepherd killed instead.
What feels like hours later, and we’re finally down to the last few, the roar of the current downpour becoming louder as the screams dwindle with each kill. I imagine the Moon Goddess is weeping at the loss of my humanity. Tonight is a night I’ll, one day, have to beg for forgiveness and not ask for a sign for permission. I’ve been to hell and back. Whatever the Moon Goddess might have prepared for me is nothing compared to the hell this world was when I thought I was alone in it without my mate.
It’s the sight of the two atrophic scars on the neck of the last female standing across the lawn that has me thinking this way. I’ll have to beg at the pearly gates for what I’ve conjured.
The female gets hold of Alpha Jack. It’s a blurred scrap on the ground until there’s a crack that slows them down. Alpha Jack yelps, rolling onto his belly at the pain. White peeks out of the bleeding wound on his leg.
Bone.
And with his belly exposed, he’s more vulnerable. Other vampires catch onto this, ganging up and crowding him. Caleb, Luna Kathy, and I rush toward him. When the female sees me coming for her, she abandons her horde.
Coward.
She’s not getting away this time.
Knowing the rest have it, I sprint across the lawn, chasing after her. She’s fast, but of course, I’m faster.
When I jump on her back, my weight has her face planting to the ground.
She doesn’t know who I am, but she will soon enough. I bark and growl, fighting my wolf’s urge to kill on scene. Not yet , I tell my wolf. I have plans for this one.
At the promise of a future execution, my wolf restrains itself enough for me to trust myself to lean down, and carefully drag her by the neck. I drop her at the feet of my warriors. They grab her instantly upon my wolf’s release of her and wait for further instruction of what I want them to do with her.
How do I tell them without shifting? I don’t want them to see me naked.
I scan the area, hoping to find something to wear. I take note of the battlefield before me. There’s only the sound of pouring rain collecting puddles on the grassy floor. The members of my kingdom fall silent. Bloodhound and Crescent alike, stand in wolf form before me, eyeing me. I peer at them, who are surrounding me as if they were staring at the Moon Goddess Herself. My wolf’s ears go back, and I lower my head to make myself smaller.
Why is everyone staring at me?
One after another, wolves crouch, bowing before me and members from Bloodhound echo the honorific Your Majesty.
Members of Crescent pack howl in unison a war cry. I scan the crowd kneeling before me, and the whispers of the fallen appear to echo with the survivors’ chants through the mindlink in the roaring thunderstorm.
The whole time I had thought Dax was gone, I’d been breaking. I thought that everyone could see this and that they didn’t want me. Yet here they were, acknowledging me as their leader, their queen.
My wolf’s ears perk up, overwhelmed at their display, at their unconditional acceptance. And most importantly, their support. It was me who was grateful for them. I was able to lean on them when I needed them.
Just like family.
My dominant she-wolf has found her home. An identity I could be sure of.
I howl at the sky, and their yips follow.
My tail wags as Sam emerges from Jemma’s front door. Smiling like a proud older brother, he approaches me with the robe I tossed at him earlier. When he reaches me, he holds it out to create a wall between him and I and turns his head, giving me privacy.
I shake my fur out before I shift into my human form. Accepting the robe, I wrap it around me, tie it in a knot, and thank him.
He nods.
It’s ineffective against the rain, but it’ll give me some cover long enough so I can tell the warriors what I need next. At least until I can get inside.
“Who do we have here?” Sam asks, crossing his arms and staring down at the female.
The female spits at the ground, glaring at us both.
“Someone in need of a reunion,” I respond.
Sam looks at me, puzzled.
I tap Dax’s mark on my neck, then point and nod to her. Sam leans in closer to her, honing in on her neck, squinting.
“Ah. Nice.” Sam holds out his fist for me to pound.
“Fucking bitch. I’m not telling you shit.” The vampire spits her venom in an attempt to take me out, but my new immune system only thrives off of it.
This villain era of mine soaks up hatred like fuel.
“What do you want to do with her?”
I grin, channeling an inner Dax.
“Hey, Caleb,” I call over my shoulder. Caleb’s wolf appears beside me. “Can you get your mother’s sewing kit?”
“Sure. What do you want me to do with it?”
“Well, first, I’d like you to lead the warriors to the dungeon. Second.”
I don’t want to spoil the whole surprise for my new captive, so I tell Caleb the rest of the instructions in the mindlink.
Caleb’s wolf smiles. He nods to me in acknowledgment before leading the warriors to Bloodhound’s dungeon. It’s been more of a decoration with the lack of attacks here, but today, I’ll be sure to get some use out of it.
I turn to follow them with my eyes, my back facing Jemma’s cabin. I was so consumed with my plan I didn’t notice that the medical team have arrived.
Alpha Jack is being carried out on a stretcher on the way to the infirmary, with Luna Kathy walking beside him.
And I completely forgot about the kingdom kneeling before me. This includes Sam, who now also is kneeling at my feet.
Despite the pouring rain, none move. As honored as I am, I don’t want everyone getting sick.
“Thank you. But, please, get inside. Get warm,” I urge.
No one moves a muscle. No one lifts their head.
I open my mouth to ask why, but I’m rendered speechless when complete utter gratitude first hits me. But it doesn’t stop there. Stomach-curling longing crashes into me with a force that’s guaranteed to have me kneeling with them. Yet, somehow, I remain standing.
Another feeling, unfamiliar to me, one I’m scared to name, has me flying and grounded at the same time. I hold my head like I have a bad migraine, staring down at the ground.
I’m whirling from the tidal wave of emotions, but I manage to find clarity.
These aren’t my emotions.
“My queen.”
My heart pounds hard. For a moment, I’m frozen. Still staring at the ground. My uneven breaths overshadow the showers around me, echoing in my brain.
Looking past Sam, I squint through the raindrops, and I can’t believe my eyes.
Dax stands in the doorway, tall and strong, despite everything he’s been through.
My heart beats to life, my wolf standing in attention. Goose bumps pepper my skin.
“Dax!” I sprint to him, my bare feet splashing in the puddles.
He hobbles, trying his best to meet me halfway.
Finally reaching him, I throw my arms up and wrap my legs around him.
Dax grunts in pain at the impact but holds me to him anyway.
“Alaina,” Dax sighs. Collapsing, he rocks me in his arms, burying his face into my neck with a low growl of approval.
I alternate between hugging him and running my hands over his nape, frantically planting kisses on his lips and cheeks. “It’s you. It’s really you!” Grabbing his face, I gaze into his beautiful, caramel eyes.
I can’t help the tears pouring out of me.
An earthquake of emotions rumble inside me. Guilt, fear, relief, and an overwhelming amount of love. I bury my face into his chest as he rocks and shushes me softly.
“Fuck, baby, you’re shaking,” Dax says, voice quivering, tightening himself around me.
I’m a blubbering mess soaking his pecks. I lift my head up to meet his stare.
He searches my face, and I can’t form the words. All I can do is shake my head slowly. He looks at Sam, concern and confusion etched on his face.
“They said—I thought—I saw—and—”
I’m not making sense and hyperventilating, and I can’t catch my breath.
“Shh, it’s okay.” He pulls me into him again, his chin resting on the top of my head and turning toward Sam. “I’m taking her upstairs. Take care of things for me?”
“Yeah, yeah, no problem. Go. I’ve got it from here,” Sam assures.
Dax scoops me into his arms, and I cling to him as he carries me up the stairs into the first bedroom meant for guests.
A choked sob leaves my throat, and he runs his hand up and down my back, shushing me. “I’m here, darling.” He kisses my hair. “I’ve got you now.”
I notice him wincing every now and then as he carries me. He’s in pain.
“Dax, you’re hurt. I can walk. It’s fine,” I insist. I attempt to wriggle out of his grasp.
“The pain is bearable. But to not hold you in my arms is an excruciating pain I’ll never be able to withstand,” he says. “Don’t fight me. Let me hold you.”
I melt.
He carries me to the bathroom and sets me on the counter to turn the shower on. With the distance, I’m able to finally collect myself enough to stop blubbering. Once he decides the water is at the right temperature, he shakes the droplets off his hand and looks in my direction.
“In,” he says as he nods toward the shower.
Knowing how I must look and smell, I don’t argue.
Dax limps over to me, wincing.
I hop off the counter, meeting him in the center of the tiled floor. He undoes the rope and peels the robe off my shoulders, letting it drop. I tug my clothes over my head. At the sight of my naked body, Dax curses under his breath. Taking my hand, he guides me into the shower.
Once we’re both in, we let the water run over us for a moment while we just stare at each other. The dirt and blood come off of us, swirling together before disappearing into the drain. I meet the eyes I never thought I’d get to stare at again, which harbor determination to care for me. All I want to do is return the favor.
Breaking eye contact, I reach for the soap. As I lather the bodywash in my hands, he stares at me as I massage soap onto his skin. Running my hands in circular motions over his chest, I see the bite marks from rogues and move my hands down the hills of his abs, over to the big purple bruise covering his ribs. I know he’s in pain, but he doesn’t even flinch from my touch. Instead, he leans into it.
I lather shampoo in my hands and gesture for him to bend down. The look in his eyes reminds me of a scared dog, not sure whether to take the treat from the human but knows he’s hungry.
Dax approaches me, and I’m instinctively walking backward until my back is against the shower wall. Dax’s arms are leaning into the wall on either side of me, caging me in. His legs are staggered and hunched over so I can reach him. His eyes don’t leave mine as he lowers his head for me.
I run my fingers through his scalp to get him used to my touch, and he relaxes. It isn’t until I start massaging his scalp with my fingertips that Dax groans and closes his eyes.
When was the last time someone’s cared for him like this? I bite my lip as tears threaten to fall from the thought of the boy who lost his mother too young. The king who is feared but never loved. The king who has only ever wanted to keep others safe, even when they don’t deserve it.
“What happened to you?” I ask softly.
He grimaces, as if recalling the events at my question causes him pain. At first, he doesn’t answer my question, probably because he isn’t sure I can handle the truth.
“The cliff . . . And the rocks . . .”
“The trees broke my fall,” he says.
“But there was so much blood—”
“There were a lot to kill.”
“You were gone for two weeks. They searched for you—”
“You found me,” he says.
There’s more but I give up. If I needed to know the details, he’d tell me. Judging by his reluctance, I’m not sure I want to know. I grab the showerhead and rinse the shampoo out of his hair. When I turn, he grabs the small of my back, while the other hand pulls my head toward him, and he slips his tongue into my mouth. His hips grind into mine, and I can feel his hard-on pressing into me.
“I thought I lost you,” I breathe out in between open-mouth kisses.
“You could never lose me.”
A tear rolls down my cheek at the thought, adding salt to our sweet kisses.
Dax breaks the connection, hands on either side of my face. Seeing my tears, he furrows his brows. “I’ll always come for you. Never doubt that.”
My heart bursts at his declaration. Utterly redefining the word devotion.
Mate needs to know , my wolf bursts eagerly.
I look down at the ground.
I want to, I planned to, but what if he doesn’t feel the same way after everything I’ve put him through?
Dax pulls me from my thoughts, placing his hand under my chin, gently lifting my face to meet his gaze.
“Say it,” he rasps desperately.
My heart skips at his plea, then resumes its pounding. I manage to swallow not only the lump in my throat but my pride as well.
“I’m so sorry.”
Like a kid finding out he received socks for Christmas, Dax tries his best to save face.
My wolf flicks me off. That isn’t what we want to tell mate.
“Why are you sorry?” Dax laughs through his confusion.
“I was so awful to you.”
“It’s okay. You—”
“I didn’t know I loved you then, but I know now.”
Dax’s eyes widen. “You love me?” He searches my face frantically.
Here I am, trying to apologize for how blind I was in the past, all that time I wasted when we could’ve been together. Time, for a while, I thought was all I would ever have. Yet he could care less about the apology he so deserves or what didn’t happen then . All that matters to him is for me to say those three little words now .
“I love you, Dax,” I admit through my tears.
It’s then Dax’s inner child surfaces and smiles like I’ve healed him of any trauma or beliefs he was unworthy of love. “I think I always have, and I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you before or—”
“Alaina.”
Walls masking his emotions come crashing down, and a tidal wave of his reciprocated love, desire, and longing washes over me. The power of these feelings causing my knees to buckle, but strong arms keep me steady.
“You feel that?”
I nod, speechless. This is what he feels for me?
“These feelings aren’t new. They’ve only grown stronger since I hunted you down.”
How could someone as wonderful as him love me this much?
“Before I went over that cliff, I couldn’t believe it when I saw you intended to have a life with me.”
My mouth parts, and my brows lift.
“But that was more a question of myself, not you. I have always wanted your love and needed you in ways I can’t begin to explain. Even before I knew you existed, whether I thought you loved me, I never needed you to love me back for me to still want you. To crave you. Cherish you. Smart mouth and all, I have and will always need you, want you, and be in love with you.”
I sniffle and smile.
“Screw ‘til death do us part,’ even after. Even if you hate me. I love you, Alaina. I fucking love you.”
He tugs my face to his, planting me on his lips. Our hands roam over each other, unable to decide where to grab. Every kiss is primal and feral with need. Breathing is cast aside as our greed to taste one another grows.
Dax finally settles on grabbing my hips, our tongues going from massaging to wrestling one another.
He presses me against the wall, dips his head, kisses and sucks on my mark, sending unbelievable sparking pleasure. Dax finds the faucet and turns the water off. He immediately picks me up, and I wrap my legs around him. He moans into my mouth as I grind myself against him, seeking friction.
With me in his arms, he walks us to the bed and lays me down on the soft comforter. He cradles my face and feasts upon me like a starving beast.
Surfacing from the depths of the depression I’ve been drowning in, I breathe him in like pure oxygen.
He trails kisses down my throat to the center of my chest, and I gasp at the feel of his hard cock at my entrance.
Dax’s amber orbs stare into mine as he spreads me open, filling me with himself. Burying his head into the crook of my neck, he breathes me in.
He’s home to me, and I never want to live without that sense of belonging ever again.
I let my canines elongate and sink my teeth into him, marking him as mine forever.