Consort (Noble Reckoning #1)

Chapter 15

Durin

The nobles do nothing productive. They only feast, boast, and strut around the forest without a care. There hasn’t been single threat to the queen since I’ve been here. This position is bullshit. Nothing even remotely noble ever happens.

I’m grateful there’s not much to do, though. It gives me time to observe and explore. I’ve been able to memorize the layout of almost the entire castle. All doors remain open other than the soldiers’ sleeping quarters. There must be hidden areas, though. There’s no dungeon, and that doesn’t make sense. I haven’t been able to explore the area around the queen’s room. It’s always guarded. Perhaps the dungeon entrance is illusioned close by.

I’ve made sure to be seen around the castle and forest enough to be recognized as a new noble. I’ve tried not to let anyone see me going to or from my room, though, which is in a different hallway than the other soldiers’ are. Thankfully, no one seems to be aware of my role as consort yet. The queen hasn’t thrown her usual celebration to present her latest prize to the fae. Perhaps there’s always been a delay, and I just wasn’t aware. Whatever the reason, it’s been to my benefit.

The fact that word hasn’t spread has given me insight on some of the nobles. The empath, Daylor, knows but hasn’t told anyone. Trass, the guard who dropped the illusion on the queen’s room, definitely knows, but has also kept quiet. The creature handler, whose name I’ve yet to learn, was there when the queen named me as consort.

Spilling my secret would make me far more noticeable to the other nobles and put a target for their cruelty on my back. These fae are either generally kind and don’t wish any extra misery on me, or they also don’t wish to be here and suspect that I feel the same. Either way, I have these three on my list of possible allies.

As for Folas, I don’t know why he hasn’t said anything. I still don’t even know what his purpose is here. From what I can tell, he’s just a runner for the queen. But to have her protection like he does… I wouldn’t put him anywhere near that list.

I’m unsure about the rest of the soldiers. I’ve not befriended any of them. They seem to just overlook me. I’m not sure if Lynoss warned them of my power or if he hid what happened due to his pride. Thankfully, they’ve left me alone.

I’ve learned a lot by just listening in. Like most of their names and magical abilities, as well as their overall personalities and special tastes for things. Most of them are deplorable, like mutilating those who are more beautiful than them, requiring other species to perform dangerous challenges in order to survive, or forcing themselves upon nearly anything alive in the forest. It’s been difficult to appear passive when I hear their detailed recounting of their sickening adventures.

But it hasn’t been all work. I’ve spent a great portion of my time peeking in on the Omega and her mother. When Farris showed me where she’s been staying, I was relieved to find it so secure.

I should have left her to it. There’s no need for me to hang around and protect her. But I couldn’t resist hiding in the shadows, enjoying her soft singing and playful imitations of an old fae merchant she once met. It brings a smile to my face, even if the joy is meant for her mother. The stolen moments have kept me going, each one a respite from the cocky nobles and their disturbing fetishes.

I didn’t plan on letting her know that I’d found her. The risk of her fleeing was high, and I didn’t want her to be hurt while searching for a new home. The one they found is remarkably well-hidden. I’d never have considered something habitable could be nestled in such a dense, punishing area of the forest. I honestly didn’t even know that area existed. It’s too far off the path to wander through mistakenly.

I’m curious about who the hideaway belonged to before, but I don’t have the connections with other nobles to ask about it. Bringing it up would draw only attention to it, anyway. For now, it’s best to leave it a mystery.

But she is too mysterious to forget. Even though there’s endless work to do, I keep finding reasons to come back to her.

An Alpha wolf could sniff them out. It’s highly doubtful any shifter would be sniffing around this close to the castle.

What if a noble stumbles upon the hideout? They wouldn’t bother trekking up here without a good reason.

What if they’re running out of supplies? It’s safer if they can avoid going out.

I couldn’t find a response to that one. So, I justified myself in gathering some things for them. I shouldn’t have gotten the cloth, but it was beautiful and soft, just like the Omega. Nothing like what I’m washed with in the castle. If I close my eyes, I can still feel her flawless skin beneath my fingertips. It deserves something luxurious.

And I won’t pretend that the blue wasn’t intentional. I wanted her to know if was from me. I want her to know that I’m not as evil as she assumes.

I spent the entire morning perched in a massive tree, eager for her to find the gifts. Seeing the smile on her face when she picked up the washing cloth made the wait well worth it. But my heart sank into the dirt when she changed her mind and stuffed the entire offering back beneath the bush.

Revealing myself was foolish. Did I really think I could bribe her into changing her mind about me? It’s madness. I don’t have time for this. And I don’t need her to like me. There are bigger things to worry about.

Because of my reckless behavior, I’ve had to linger close by for two full days to ensure they don’t run. The time has dragged on and on. Each time she laughs or sings, I long to see her face. Then, I curse myself for my inability to forget her. It’s a brutal cycle of punishment but one that I’ve definitely earned.

I think it’s been long enough. I’m fairly confident they won’t run. Torturing myself any longer isn’t necessary. I snatch the bundle from the bush and start back for the castle. On the way, I pass by the gryphon’s cave and leave most of my coin at the entrance. I don’t need all of it–or any of it, really. There’s a chance that she’ll continue to look over the Omega if she is pleased with the gold.

I leave the discarded supplies outside a small fae village, hoping someone will find them useful. The washing cloth, however, goes in my pocket. She didn’t accept it, but I can’t accept the idea of anyone else having it.

On my way back, I stop by the market for some stiff wine. The queen hasn’t given me any specific tasks since I replaced Mitah. I might as well work on an urgent matter of my own–forgetting about the Omega. With my remaining coin, I buy two large jugs and continue on my way.

The first goes down easily as I wander back to the castle. I try to fill my mind with anything but the little shifter; gryphons, my new magic, my parents… Before I know it, the jug is empty. I look around for somewhere to leave it where it can be used again.

I groan silently, letting my head fall back in defeat when I find myself in front of the Omega’s ballberry bush.

My mind was a little too distracted. The obsession snuck out and led me back to this familiar spot. Why can’t I just move on? All this power, and I can’t keep myself away from one tiny shifter who wants nothing to do with me.

Well, I won’t be drinking the second jug. Not when I was so careless with the first. It takes a bit of effort, but I manage to shove it under the thorny bush and stumble away before I’m noticed.

She can accept it or not. Either way, I’m done with the wine, and I’m done obsessing over her.

***

Fuck me. What was that wine spelled with? I feel like every tree in the forest took turns whipping me all night. I’m dizzy and nauseated, and this headache is a kind of pain I’ve not encountered before. I don’t remember getting back to the castle, only a flash of calling Folas a pixie dick when he tried to speak to me.

I guzzle down a cup of strong tea, trying to lessen the wine’s effects. Food would probably help, but the more I stare at the pile of pastries the servants left, the more my stomach protests. Perhaps I’ll skip breakfast this morning.

I stand and change my uniform, leaving the sour-smelling one by the tub. Splashing cool water on my face helps with the haziness. But as soon as I begin to feel a little better, I realize I left the same potent wine for the Omega to drink.

Shit!

She’s so small. It could really make her sick. Then she’ll think I tried to poison her. I need to go back and retrieve the wine before she notices it. Not that it would be horrible if she hated me even more. Maybe then I’d let go of this foolish hope of her one day knowing the real me. But the thought of making her sick brings the nausea storming back in. I need to get rid of the wine before she can drink any of it.

She’d likely never accept it, knowing it came from me. But I can’t take the chance of it making her ill. Plus, I’m not in love with the idea of being rejected again if she doesn’t take it. I stomp back through thorny bushes and trip over hidden rocks and roots at my feet. How I could have drunkenly wandered through this mess yesterday without severely injuring myself is a mystery I’ll likely never solve.

When I get back to the bush, I find that the wine is gone. Only a gap remains where I had shoved the branches aside to make room for it.

My queasy stomach twists as I listen for any sounds of illness–retching, groaning, cursing... But I can’t hear anything over the pounding in my skull. I edge closer to the thicket to listen, willing my headache to give it a rest so I can be sure.

It’s perfectly quiet, no sounds of distress of any kind. I breathe deeply, and my nerves subside enough to think. I need to figure out how to get the wine back before either of them drinks it.

As I’m considering my limited options, something dawns on me. The Omega took the wine. She accepted it.

My heart starts to pound. My mind races ahead like a juvenile with a charming elixir for his crush. I imagine the Omega leaving something for me in return, then inviting me inside her home, then opening up to me about why she’s hiding.

But it’s insanity. Of course she took the wine. Who turns down wine? The look on her face when her heat broke made it clear she’ll never forgive me. Even if she did, nothing could come of it. She deserves better than me. I’m unworthy of her attention.

Though I know how true that is, I still find myself desperate for it. My chest feels like it’s caving in any time I think about walking away from her. And now that she’s accepted a gift from me, any attempt at forgetting her seems pointless. And like a gigantic waste of my time.