Corrupted Memories (Made Men of Manhattan #2)

Prologue

Gianna

Six Years Ago

I don’t remember how I returned to my dorm room, but I do remember briefly stopping to throw up in the closest patch of grass.

A bloomed bush with red flowers less than a block from the bar, just far enough that he couldn’t hear.

I remember the bite of the cold as I walked the few miles back to campus.

The sidewalk had been a blur before me, each passing car that casted shadows made me flinch.

My stomach turns when I climb the familiar steps, ones he’s carried me up plenty of times. I can still taste the bitter bile from earlier when it threatens to rise again. I wipe my mouth, and my hands shake as I try to unlock the door, my vision still hazy.

When the key finally finds its place, I turn the lock and step into my dark room.

It feels preordained considering all the memories it once held no longer bring any color or joy to me.

It’s all been poisoned, corrupted by what I witnessed because that’s not the man I’ve grown to love.

The man I thought I knew wouldn’t be capable of such… violence.

The piercing trills of my phone ringing make me scream. I drop my keys and pull out the loud device, my blood chilling down to the bone at the sight of the flashing name.

“Hello?” I answer, my voice hoarse. I cover my mouth to muffle my quickening breaths.

“Where are you? The math building is cleared out,” he says. I had forgotten that he always meets me at my last class, and then we walk over to the bar. The bar where I watched him—

I flip the light on, basking in the brief light to chase away the dark thoughts.

My mind whirls to come up with an excuse.

The longer I take to answer, the less he’ll believe me.

Sebastian is a suspicious man by nature.

I have maybe ten minutes before he makes his way back here if I give him any indication I’m not coming.

Picking up my keys, I jingle them dramatically. “Sorry, just getting back to my room. I spilled my coffee and I needed to shower again. I’m almost ready, and I’ll head over.”

“Coffee? This late?”

I squeeze my eyes briefly. Fuck, why’d I choose coffee. He’s right, I would never drink it this late. I laugh, and grimace when I'm not convinced by it so I clear my throat. Shutting my door, I glance around my room, determining what I need to take.

“Uh. It was free. Who turns down free stuff?”

There’s a brief silence before he sighs. “You sound…”

“Long day,” I drawl, my eyes watering from anxiety because he’s probably going to come here regardless of what I say. “I promise I’m almost on my way.”

“Alright,” he finally agrees. “I’ll see you soon.”

“Yup, love you,” I force myself to say, knowing it will stall him just a little bit.

He hangs up promptly like he usually does when I say those words. I breathe out a sigh of relief and call my brother immediately. I grab my backpack, balancing the phone on my shoulder as I pull out the binders and books.

“Hey, G.”

“I need to leave. Like right now.” I finally allow the tears to start falling.

“What?” My brother’s voice strains at my desperation. “What happened, Gianna? Did he hurt you?”

I shove my school supplies under my bed, keeping them from view as I turn to my closet to grab a few things. I have to make my room look normal, untouched, as if he just missed me when he eventually comes looking.

“No, no. I can’t explain too much right now. Can you get me out and make sure he can’t find me?”

My brother needs no explanation of who I’m talking about. He’s hated Sebastian since the moment I introduced them. He’s hinted on more than one occasion that my boyfriend isn’t someone he’s pretending to be. I’d been too in love to notice or care, considering he’s never mistreated me.

I move to the attached bathroom, grabbing my make-up and birth control. The latter falls as I rush back into the room.

“Shit,” I curse at the packets spread out on the floor. My clumsiness is going to be the death of me. My body flinches at the thought of death.

“What?” Matt demands before yelling loud enough at a few other people in the background that I can hear. I’m sure it’s the guys he works with. My brother owns a well-known security company, which is why I trust him to get me out of this.

“Nothing, I’m packing. Can I explain later?” I plead, remembering the breathing exercises he taught me to stay calm. “I need to leave, please.”

I kneel, scooping up the medication, and pause when I grab the first packet.

I pull it the rest of the way out of the sleeve, looking at the dark pink color of the pill, and then grab my current one on my nightstand.

My stomach knots when I see the difference.

Maybe it’s paranoia speaking, but I’m sure these are not the same.

I get mine in packages for six months at a time, and I just opened this one.

Despair settles in my heart when I’m certain these pills are fake.

There’s some doubt he would purposely try to knock me up.

But on the other hand, he’s done nothing but talk about us getting married and having kids the last few months.

I always laugh it off, especially since it’s coming from a man who won’t even confess his feelings.

And after what I witnessed, this is only a drop in the bucket.

“GIANNA!” My brother’s shout snaps me back into the present, and I realize I’ve dropped the phone.

“I’m sorry, I’m here,” I squeak, throwing my medication under the bed. No way am I taking that with me.

“Fifteen minutes. There will be a car in fifteen minutes. Are you—” My brother pauses. “Is that too long?”

“I’m safe at the moment.”

He exhales loudly, and then he’s back in work mode. “Pack light. Grab only essentials. Wear darker clothes to blend into the night. I’ll see you soon.”

“Thank you,” I tell him, my throat threatening to close up with emotion.

He sighs. “You’re always my first priority. If you’re not in that car in about—thirteen minutes, my guys have been given permission to use any force necessary.”

“I understand,” I tell him, shoving the last few items into my backpack as he hangs up. I’m zipping it up when I hear the lock on my door turning, and I shove my bag into my desk chair.

There’s only one person who has their own key to my room. He must have driven here because walking would have taken twice as long.

His icy eyes catch mine as he steps through, and a petrifying shiver hums under my skin.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, my heart pounding, but proud I’m able to keep the wistful tone I’d usually use with him.

“I thought I would walk you back once you’re done getting ready.

” He steps closer, and I try to relax the tension in my shoulders.

He pauses, his eyes narrowing before they drag down the length of my body.

I’m in the same leggings and shirt he saw me in this morning.

A shirt that didn’t have a stain on it. I’d hoped he wouldn’t notice, but I’m kidding myself since he’s the most observant man I know.

Rubbing a hand down my leg to wipe off the nerves, I have to think of a way to distract him.

I shift, cocking my hip and placing my hand on it with a grin. “Well, that’s perfect.”

“Is it?” he asks, almost mockingly.

I nod, stepping closer to him, praying my hands don’t shake as I grab his shirt and push my body against his. “Yes, because now I don’t have to drag you back. We can just stay here.”

He lifts an eyebrow. “You don’t want to go? It’s Friday.”

“Nope.” I pop the word with my lips and flutter my eyelashes at him. I trace a finger up the middle of his shirt, hooking it at the parted top so the next button comes undone. “I had an exciting class today and wanted to try something new.”

His hands snap around me, startling me as one grips my hip and the other slides around my nape, keeping my head in place and facing him. “And you didn’t say anything earlier because?”

I bite my bottom lip nervously, faking innocence with a single, slow blink. “I’m a bit embarrassed to ask.”

The heat in his eyes flares, and he keeps his hold tight as he walks me backward to the bed. Right when the back of my knees reach the edge of the mattress, I push at his chest to stop.

“The lesson was about empowerment. Women's empowerment and how a little control in the bedroom could potentially boost your confidence.”

“Control?” he asks, his face unreadable.

“Now, lie down.” I push against his chest again, making him take a step back. I smirk and lean over to open the nightstand and grab the silk ties he uses on me regularly.

Sebastian stares at me silently for a few seconds before moving around to sit on my bed. I wave my hand, telling him to scoot back more, and he squints his eyes.

“One time,” I beg, pouting. “And then you can do whatever you want. Nothing off limits.”

His tongue drags across his bottom lip, and he flashes his teeth wickedly. “Nothing? You said I was never allowed back there again.”

I shrug, pushing against his shoulders to move him back more as I crawl onto the bed. Of course his mind would immediately jump to anal. I hover above him on my knees, my thighs straddling his legs. “You have to promise to be gentler this time. It hurt for days after.”

“I can’t control the size of my dick, Anna.” He chuckles, lazily moving his wrists so they rest against the bars of my headboard.

I love this man entirely, even as I plan to run from him, and I’ve never heard him say my real name.

Guilt tugs inside me at the use of my nickname, a name my brother had me adopt when I started school.

When we finally inherited everything from our parent’s death, he said it was safer to go with shortened versions of our names for anyone who may be looking to latch onto us for our money.

My heart is screaming, and my stomach feels like it’s filled with lead as I tie the soft material tightly around them. I lick my lips as I lean back, drop my weight on his lap, and grind once against his hard length. He jerks, his arms trying to snap forward but only managing to swing an inch.

I smile smugly at him. Any other day, I would have loved to play with him like this.

He shakes his head, his lips curling up. “One time, and we keep this between us.”

I roll my eyes and hop off the bed, moving to the second drawer of my nightstand and grabbing the kit Matt forces me to keep. When my hand touches the zip ties, I glance at Sebastian, who is watching me. His eyes have lost all humor, and his jaw is tight.

“This is my limit, Anna. You’re not sticking anything up my ass,” he says with a growl.

Everything inside of me aches when I realize my life is about to change.

Once I finish my task, I’ll have to run and hope he can’t follow me.

A part of me already misses the way he holds and kisses me, the softer side of him only I get to see.

I’m about to destroy that side of him, and I know that.

He may have never told me how he feels, but sometimes I swear I could feel his feelings as if they were my own.

“You sure? You might like it?” I tease him, thankful my voice isn’t strained.

“I’m fucking—” I stand up quickly and climb over him, looping the plastic around one wrist and bar before shoving it into the end piece. I pull on it tightly until it cuts into the flesh of his wrist and rubs against the silk. He hisses, his knee coming up in reflex to buck me over him.

My head slams against the wall and my vision spots.

Sebastian thrusts under me, trying to dislodge me further.

He pulls harshly against the silk, trying to loosen the knot.

I shake my head, dropping my weight against his chest, and hear him grunt out a harsh breath.

I get the other zip tie, fumbling it around the bar of my headboard, and his arm tries to knock against mine before I successfully get the end in and pull on it desperately.

Each click of the zip tie tightening echoes around me, as if I’m being enclosed in my coffin and listening to it being nailed shut.

“UNDO THIS NOW!” Sebastian bellows, and I scramble off him. His face flushes with anger, and his cold eyes stare at me. His chest heaves as his arms keep pulling at where he’s tied to my bed.

“Are my birth control pills fake?” I ask, needing that small peace of mind that I’m right. It wouldn’t be the worst thing he’s done, but I would tack it onto the growing list.

He stills. “Is that what this is about?”

“Are they fake?” I repeat.

“What does it matter? You’re having my children either way.”

I huff out an exasperated breath. “It matters because it’s my choice.

Not yours.” If he believes that’s why I’m upset, all the better, because there’s no chance he’d let me live after what I witnessed.

I rub my forehead where it clashed with the wall and step farther away from him, grabbing my bag.

I make my way to the door, exhausted from the entire night.

“Anna. If you leave me like this, you will regret it.” His voice is firm and impersonal.

I look back at him with a sad smile. “Goodbye, Sebastian.”