Crazy Imperfect Hearts

Chapter Seven

Regan

“Knock knock,” I whisper and peek around the door.

Maddie waves. “Come on in.”

My hand covers my heart when I see eleven-year-old Gigi sitting on the small sofa holding her new little brother.

I deposit the flowers and teddy bear on the table with all the others. “How are you?” I ask my friend.

Maddie smiles brightly. “Perfect.”

“His name is Teddy,” Gigi announces proudly.

I walk over and stare down at him, only able to see his tiny face, the rest of him wrapped in a blanket and beanie. “Hey, little dude.” I touch Gigi’s shoulder. “Looks like you’re already an amazing sister, eh, squirt?”

“Mom let me change his diaper. It was gross. But she said if I wanted to babysit someday, I had to learn how to do it. It was all yellow like mustard and—”

“Okay then,” I interrupt, not wanting her to forever ruin one of my favorite condiments. “That’s something I most definitely do not need a play-by-play on.”

Maddie snickers on the other side of the room.

Tag comes in the room carrying a Diet Coke. He hands it to Maddie then notices me. “Hi, Regan.”

I wave then point at Teddy. “Well done. Looks like he’s a keeper.”

Tag beams. What a far cry from the Tag Calloway I knew growing up. The cocky jock who thought he could have anything or anyone. The guy I hooked up with forever ago. That Tag is long gone. This one, the one who is Maddie’s husband and now Gigi’s and Teddy’s dad, he’s one of the most stand-up men I know.

“Come on, princess,” he says to Gigi. “Let’s give your mom and Regan a minute. I saw strawberry ice cream in the cafeteria.”

He expertly scoops Teddy from Gigi’s arms and turns to me. “Want to hold him?”

I take a step back and shake my head. I don’t hold babies. Sure, some of my friends have had them over the years, but I admire them from afar. They are so small and delicate. I’m terrified I’ll do something to hurt them.

Tag puts his son in the rolling bassinet next to Maddie’s hospital bed. “See you girls later.” He kisses his wife and then leaves with Gigi.

“You won’t break him, you know,” Maddie says.

I laugh quietly. “You really want to test that theory with someone who’s never held one?”

“I’d never held a baby until I had Gigi. It’s a natural instinct.”

“For some people maybe. Not me.”

“Come on. You have to do it sometime. If Gigi can do it, you can.” Her stare is unrelenting.

“You’re going to make me do it, aren’t you?” My hands land defensively on my hips.

She shifts so she’s sitting at the edge of the bed and pulls the bassinet closer. Then she picks up a sleeping Teddy and practically shoves him at me.

“If I drop your kid and he walks in circles for the rest of his life, you’ll only have yourself to blame.”

Her eyes roll. “Shut up. You aren’t going to drop him.” She settles him against me. “Keep his head in the crook of your elbow for support.”

Staring down at the day-old human, I capitulate and let him mold into my arms. I don’t move a muscle. I’m a friggin’ statue, fearing if I even twitch, he’ll cry. But he doesn’t wake. After a few moments, his little mouth twists with a yawn then makes a sucking motion before he stills again.

“Damn, you guys made a cute kid.”

She pulls back the beanie, showing me his dark tuft of fine hair. “He’s got Tag’s gorgeous hair.”

“The rest of him looks just like Gigi.”

“I think so too.”

“Okay, you can take him back now,” I say, not daring to look away from Teddy for fear of dropping him.

Maddie chuckles. “Fine. But one of these days, I’m going to get you to do a lot more.”

“Yeah, we’ll see.”

When she takes Teddy from me, I breathe a sigh of relief. But that relief also comes with something else, a niggling in the back of my mind that I can’t quite put my finger on.

I sit on the foot of her bed. “You’ll never guess who came into my shop today.”

When I don’t immediately tell her, she asks, “Are you going to make me pull it out of you like the other—wait… it was Lucas, wasn’t it? Lucas Montana came into your shop?”

I nod. “You’ll never guess what he—”

“He asked you out.”

“No.” I shake my head vehemently. “But he did ask for a do-over.”

“A what?” she asks incredulously.

“He spewed some bullshit about it being his only one-nighter and he was too drunk to remember it so he thought we should do it again.”

Maddie’s jaw almost hits the mattress. “That’s ridiculous.”

“It’s a load of crap is what it is.”

“You put him in his place, I’m sure. I would have loved to hear you go off on him, the idiot.”

I shrug a shoulder innocently. “Well…”

She puts Teddy back in the bassinet and squares off with me. “Are you telling me you agreed to it?”

I shrug again.

“But you just said it was bullshit.”

“It is. I think he’s still pissed about Lissa and just wants to be with someone… anyone … to make himself feel better.”

“You shouldn’t do this.”

“Maddie, it’s one time. Well, one more time. That’s it.”

“As long as you’re sure.”

“I am. I know who he is. I know what he does. Plus, he’s a smoker. You know how that disgusts me.”

She laughs. “I do know. Tag used to smoke.”

I cover my mouth. “I almost forgot.”

As if talking about him summoned him, Tag and Gigi come back in the room. He looks at Maddie. “Did she do it?”

Maddie nods with a smile.

Tag takes out his wallet and hands her a twenty.

I look between them. “What am I missing?”

“He didn’t think I could get you to hold Teddy,” Maddie explains.

I roll my eyes and say to Gigi, “Your parents are toddlers.”

“Toddlers aren’t always making kissy faces and squeezing each other’s backsides,” she says, nose turned up. “Yuck.”

Maddie, Tag, and I fall into fits of laughter.

“You won’t think it’s so yucky in a few years,” I say.

Tag stops laughing. “Don’t remind me.”

Teddy wakes and cries. I’m amazed a teeny-tiny infant can emit such a piercing sound.

Amid the racket, the door opens and Patrick Kelsey swaggers through carrying a huge bouquet of flowers and a gift bag.

“Uncle Patty!” Gigi exclaims, rushing into his arms.

Patrick is Maddie’s best guy friend. They go way back to when he was the firefighter/paramedic who rescued Gigi from her father’s arms in the fire that killed him and scarred Maddie.

He holds the gift bag out to Gigi. “This is for you, squirt.”

Her eyes light up and she pulls out a sweatshirt. It reads: B·I·G S·I·S·T·E·R in true Friends fashion. Underneath, it says: I’ll be there for you .

She holds it to her chest. “I love it!”

Patrick congratulates Tag, kisses Maddie, and gives me a fist bump. He once performed the Heimlich maneuver on me, saving me from certain death by cashew.

“What’s up, peanut?” he jokes and gives me a wink.

“I think it’s about time for this little guy to eat,” Maddie says, undoing her nursing bra.

I take a step toward the door. “My cue to leave.”

“Hey, Regan?” Maddie calls.

I turn.

“Just be careful, okay?”

“Yes, Mom,” I say, then I blow a kiss to Gigi and leave.

On my way out of the hospital, I pass one of Tag’s brothers, Jaxon, and his wife, Nikki, carrying a stuffed bear that might be as big as Gigi.

“You see him yet?” Nikki asks.

“Just now.”

“He’s adorable, isn’t he?” she says, patting her own slight belly. “I can’t wait for this little one to arrive.” She leans against her husband. “I’ll have ten more if this guy will let me.”

Jaxon rolls his eyes, but we all know he’s up for it. The man was born to be a father.

“See you guys later,” I say, starting the trek home.

I love how walkable this older part of town is. The hospital is less than ten minutes from McQuaid Circle. Everything one could need is within walking distance. There are restaurants, a bank, a hair and nail salon, a hardware store, a grocer…

A grocer.

Suddenly my thoughts are on Saturday. When I’m supposed to do my shopping and run into Lucas.

I’m not nervous. I don’t get nervous about men. Not anymore. And I’m especially not nervous about him . Because this isn’t a date. It doesn’t matter how I look or what I wear. But I am curious. Was he being honest about the reason or is he trying to forget about Lissa as I suspect? Either way, Maddie is right, it’s probably a bad idea.

I do plan on getting information out of him. Like more about this crush he had on me and how my dad caught him playing with himself.

And now, I’m thinking of him touching himself. I have firsthand knowledge of just how much there is to touch. There have been rumors. In this town, it’s expected. There were nicknames. My favorite was Mountain Montana. I can’t remember which of his girlfriends or fiancées would joke about climbing the mountain. Or maybe not joke… brag.

Every single rumor turned out to be true. The man is huge. Long, wide, and firm. Practically a freak of nature.

I feel myself flush. My steps quicken as I mentally go through my bedside drawer and pick out the toy that’s going to make me come in about five minutes.