26. TYLER
Chapter 26
TYLER
Dear Tyler,
My internet is absolute shit, so I can’t call or Facetime. Once I get more settled in, I’ll hopefully be able to have more contact with you. How are you? How are things at the bar? How are your parents? Scarlett…?
I’m okay.
My days are long, and nights are shorter than I’d like them to be when I work during the day. I’m not getting much sleep as some of the missions are at night and it’s hard for me to sleep during the day. I guess there’s not much going on with me except for work. There’s nothing to do here on my downtime. The camp is small and we sleep in cots in one big tent. Probably will be for the duration of the deployment. My back will probably be broken by the time we’re done here. But I can’t complain much. I have some time to read, and I’ve been doing that.
I miss you so much, Ty.
Oh, and I miss Skittles and M&M’s. Any chance you could send me some?
With love,
Noah.
I smile as I shut the computer, looking at Scarlett sitting on the couch watching The Vampire Diaries . I’ll reply to him later when she’s not home. I don’t want to risk her seeing the emails. And yet she looks right at me as if she can see through me. Through my lies and deception. And she raises one perfectly sculpted eyebrow.
“What are you doing, Ty?” she asks slowly.
“N-nothing,” I stutter.
Fucking hell.
Real smooth, Tyler.
“Can we talk?” Her eyes are pleading, and I narrow mine on hers.
“Sure?”
Saying that things have been rocky between us is the understatement of the year. Ever since I saw Noah off, we’ve been in the fucking trenches. She was beside herself when I made it back home, and just as I expected, it was also the fight of the century. The worst one we’ve ever had. Which I can’t blame her for. I know she knew I cheated. But she never brought it up. I think she’s too scared to face the truth, and honestly so am I.
I’m leaving her.
It’s just a matter of time.
I’m getting my affairs in order before Noah gets back in eight and a half months, and nothing and no one will stop me from being with him.
Scarlett gets up from the couch, comes to the dining room, and looks right at me, then turns around and begins to pace the kitchen. She’s running her hands through her curly red hair, making it frizzy, and I sigh.
“What is it, Scar?” I ask her softly, trying to put her at ease. But she stops and faces me, her eyes welling up with tears immediately. The urge to sigh is almost too much, but I manage to hold it in. I did this to her. I continue to do this to her. I swallow past the lump of guilt in my throat. “What’s wrong?”
“I want a baby.”
Four words shouldn’t trigger me this much.
I tense. “We’ve had this talk?—”
“So, let’s have it again.”
“I’m not changing my mind, Red.” This time I do sigh. “It’s not the right time.”
“What the fuck do you mean it’s not the right time?!” she yells. “I’m about to be thirty years old, Tyler. My clock is ticking.”
“We’re still young?—”
“We’re financially stable. The bar is doing great—better than great actually. I have a good job that pays well. We have a house!” Her nostrils flare as she tries to get her temper under control. “And most importantly, I’m ready.”
“And I’m not, Scar.” This time I get up from my chair and throw my hands up. “I’m not!”
“And why the fuck not?!”
“Have you stopped to consider that maybe I don’t want kids?” With you.
“Fuck that,” she spits. “I know you better than that.”
“Maybe you don’t know me at all!” I shout. “Not anymore.”
“Fuck you!”
“You too!” I yell after her as she storms out of the house.
Running my hand over my face in frustration, I sit back down at the dining room table and open my laptop.
Then I reply to Noah.