Perfect
A giggle bubbled up from the depths of my soul. I must be losing it. That or deep down I was always like this. And the short time I’d spent with Ryder and Dare had already taken its toll. A wolf monster cuddled me while his twin petted me like a dog. Unconventional yet it worked. The idea of Darius eating Cohen as a snack shouldn’t have been so funny, but it was. Imagining my fiance facing off against either one of my mates in a fight or battle was ridiculous. The top of Cohen’s head wouldn’t reach Darius’ chest even if he stood on his tippy toes. Ignorance is bliss because there’s no way he wouldn’t shit himself if he saw my wolf beast.
I swiped a tear away as Ryder leaned in and booped my nose with his. “I love that sound.”
I’ll never get used to his random tenderness. It thawed something dark and cold buried deep. Even with this fake version of him, Ryder would tower over Cohen. He sat criss-cross applesauce in front of me. And I loved how innocent this felt, even though he was a flesh-eating monster.
But it was my turn for questions.
“Why do you hide behind this skin suit?” I reached out and pulled at the skin, but felt fur. “Don’t get me wrong, it’s hot, but it isn’t you.” Ryder looked between me and his brother. He thought for a minute and then leaned back as he grabbed his ankles.
Did monsters have ankles?
“We were held captive in the dungeons. My uncle was poisoned by a witch, she moved him like a puppet. You’d have to be possessed to kill your own brother. For what? Control? Riches? To be king? I’d throw all those away for Dare. The things we’ve been through would make even the devil cringe. Once freed, I did everything to take care of us. I tore out the weeds, but Dare was losing himself to the curse. I was faced with a choice: ensure our safety or join my brother. It was easier dealing with the humans being Ryder, the man. The glamour was a crutch, and with each day that passed, it became my mask.”
Darius had gone from petting me to knocked out cold. I needed answers, and it was best to start with the brother who wouldn’t rip off my arm if I asked the wrong question.
“You did what you needed to do. Sometimes all we can manage is to survive. So… how does it work? Do you have to shift? Or is it like a switch? One you can turn off at any time?” I whispered.
“There’s no shifting. This isn’t a form I take. I’ve just used it so much it feels like a second skin. Why are you so curious about the monster beneath?”
“I can’t want to know what my mate looks like?” I teased, running my hand over his calf. Taking note of the size so I can try and gauge how big he is.
“I never said that,” he murmured.
“Gasp! Is it because… you’re ugly?” I giggled. He narrowed his gaze at me, and I stuck my tongue out at him.
“And if I am? Would you try and escape again?” We were playing and I liked it.
“No, see, I’m a bookish girlie.” Ryder tilted his head, clearly confused. Of course, he didn’t know what that meant.
“I read a lot of monster romance–stories about love between a human and a hideous beast. Most would think this is wrong, but ugly is in the eye of the beholder. Sometimes, what one finds grotesque, another finds beautiful. And they deserve love, too. Besides, if you love them, why should their appearance matter?”
Ryder’s eyes widened before he laughed.
“See? You’re perfect for us.” His words made me flush and I bit my lips as I smiled.
“Why don’t you and Darius fuck?” I didn’t think that one through. It just came up like word vomit. But it had been on my mind. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn’t ask brothers why they didn’t have sex, but nothing about them was normal. I’d seen the way Ryder looked at him. He’d gone quiet.
“We don’t talk about what happened down there, but… we’ve fucked. It was before and Darebear didn’t have a choice. Ever since we freed ourselves, he won’t. No matter how much I beg, or reassure him. It isn’t love to him. He sees it as his biggest failure—not protecting me.”
I wanted to pry, to dig deeper, but I didn’t. Because the expression on Ryder’s face told me he was on the cusp of losing control.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered. And just like that, Ryder smiled, and it was as if my words vanquished the horrors of his past.
“Are you going to tell me what made you laugh? Earlier when Darius said snack.”
“Woah, there, buddy. You’ve gotten enough out of me. If I’m going to give you anymore, you need to do something for me,” I teased. Gods, I was trying to keep this light, but I hoped he didn’t get angry.
“And what do you want?” Ryder asked cautiously.
“Remove your glamour.” My demand was met with silence.
“And if I don’t?”
“Nothing. I can’t force you to do anything. It would be your choice,” I whispered.
“Seductress. Are you trying to get my knot?” he growled.
“That’s not what’s happening. If I didn’t have sex until next month, it would still be too soon,” I laughed.
“Not likely,” he chuffed.
“Gee, thanks,” I huffed, glaring at his beautiful grays, since I knew those were really his.
“Come on, Bunny. I want to laugh too,” he urged. It felt like he was begging. I dangled the delicious fruit of knowledge in front of him.
“This isn’t fair. There’s no equivalent exchange here, you’re just taking.” Even as the words left my mouth, I knew he’d won.
He looked at me with puppy dog eyes and a pouty lip. I sighed.
“It’s nothing. Thinking of Darius gobbling up Cohen… was funny. No big deal,” I said nonchalantly.
Ryder laughed then. His body shook as lips pulled far back, and his eyes squinted.
He was beautiful.
“Are you laughing at me now?” I teased.
“Mm… you’re naughty,” Ryder hummed. He crawled into bed beside us. The fire flickered, the glow dancing across the walls. Laying his head beside mine, he closed his eyes, and I watched the slow rise and fall of his chest.
“That’s it? You’re not going to give me what I wanted? Even though I answered your question?” I poked his chest, but he kept his eyes closed.
“The sun will be up soon. You’re tired. Get your rest, before I take you again,” he warned.
That’ll do it.
“I hope you don’t snore,” I grumbled. Before sleep took me, I swear I saw a flash of teeth as he smiled.