Cursed Love (The Vallaverse)

3. Koa

Koa

I’m not putting that shit on. The dress Damien bought is spread out on my bed like some kind of shimmering beast, glaring back at me. The barely-there fabric, drenched in sheen and shimmer to highlight every curve I’d rather keep hidden is a horrid choice for the gala tonight. It screams look at me, like I’m some cheap prize at a carnival waiting for the highest bidder. “I’m not a piece of meat,” I spit out to no one in particular.

I hold it up, grimacing at the way my lamp shines right through the fabric. This is what some of the other Omegas and Betas do at the Scarlet Selection—wrap themselves up like candy and hope an Alpha bites. It’s disgusting, but it works. The right dress, the right scent, and suddenly you’re the center of attention. But the Alphas aren’t the only ones watching.

The Valla are always lurking. No one talks about them outright; they’re more like ghost stories whispered in dark corners. The nightmares in meat suits, parents call them, warning their children to stay away. The tales are endless—Valla ripping apart anyone who dares look at their Omega the wrong way, dragging their prey home, and vanishing into the shadows. And when they lose control? No one wins. Everyone knows the stories of Valla locked away for their crimes, how their violence knows no bounds, even for those they’re supposed to protect.

But there are other stories too. Darker ones. The whispered rumors of Valla who don’t cherish their Omegas, who don’t just protect—they own. As abusive as the worst Alphas, if not worse. No one really knows what’s fact and what’s fiction, but I do know one thing: I’d take my chances with an Alpha before I’d ever go home with a Valla.

I shake my head, tearing my gaze from the dress before I burn it. My phone sits on my nightstand, and I grab it as I head for my closet. The closet is the only place in this house that feels like mine. Damien and my father don’t bother coming in here unless it’s to bark orders or throw their weight around.

Inside, my makeshift nest waits for me—a pile of fluffy, bright pillows my mom bought before she died. It’s the one thing about being an Omega I don’t hate, the way nesting feels like a tiny rebellion, a soft sanctuary in a world that’s constantly clawing at me. I keep the nest hidden in the closet, though. If Damien or my father ever found it, they’d ruin it, just to remind me that even this small comfort isn’t mine to keep.

I step inside and close the doors behind me, shutting out the rest of the world. The air smells faintly of lavender from the pillow spray I use, and for the first time today, my shoulders relax. I sink down into the nest, phone in hand, and scroll through my contacts until I find the one person who might still pick up—Amelia.

She’s a mated Omega now, halfway across the country, living the kind of life I’ll probably never have. But we used to go to school together and she’s the only person who ever treated me like I was more than just my designation. If anyone understands how trapped I feel, it’s her.

The screen of my phone lights up with Amelia’s face. Her cheeks are flushed, her grin wide as the image crackles to life. Those luscious brown curls spilling over shoulders accentuate those full cheeks and the bright hazel eyes which are always so damn curious. It’s infuriating how good she looks, even in her version of casual.

“Koa!” she beams, her voice practically dripping in sugar. “You wouldn’t believe where I am right now.”

I snort. “Knowing you? Probably somewhere obnoxiously fancy.” I always get a small kick of living vicariously through her, Amelia meeting the two most wonderful men at a gala several years ago. Tall, beautiful Alphas from the Dominican Republic, richer than I could even wrap my head around. For the brief moment I saw them before they whisked her away, even their shoes were worth more than my existence.

Amelia giggles, pulling the phone away from her face and then pans the camera around, showing me a view of some sprawling estate. Marble floors gleam under golden light and beyond the open windows, there’s a pool that might as well be a damn lake. Lush greenery surrounds the whole thing, like something out of a dream or a fantasy I don’t get to have.

“Can you believe this?” she says, her voice bubbling with excitement. “We just got here yesterday. My Alphas thought I needed a little getaway, so they rented this place for a week. Can you imagine? A week of being pampered like a queen.”

I manage a laugh, though it sticks in my throat. “Must be nice.” I curl a little tighter into myself, wedging myself between pillow A and pillow B. I was going to name them but they actually have frilly letters ‘a’ and ‘b’ on them and so that’s what they are.

She pauses, her expression softening. “Sorry, Koa. I’m rambling again, aren’t I?”

“A little,” I admit, though there’s no real bite to my words. Her rambling gives me something to focus on and as jealous as I am, some part of me loves the way her mates smile at her through the little screen, the way they dote on her, the way she’s living out the dream of every Omega.

She sighs, leaning closer to the camera. “How are you? Really?”

I look away, staring at the pillow I’m clutching. “This is it, Amelia. My last night of freedom. Tomorrow, Damien will have me signed, sealed, and delivered to whoever he’s decided is worthy of the family name. I don’t even get a say in it.” I would have gotten a say in it if I just chose someone but the few people I’ve been interested in didn’t want an Omega who couldn’t have kids. I’ve learned to deal with it.

Her face twists with sympathy, but it’s not enough to dull the ache in my chest. “Koa, I’m so sorry. That’s not fair.”

I laugh bitterly. “Fair? You know that word doesn’t exist for Omegas like me.”

Amelia leans back, her head resting against a cushion that looks softer than anything I’ll ever own. “It’s not all bad, though,” she says carefully. “Maybe you’ll get lucky. Maybe you’ll find a Valla to take care of you.”

I freeze, frowning at the screen. “Why the hell would you wish that on me?”

She giggles, and it’s so light, so carefree, it almost pisses me off. “Because all those stories? The ones about Valla being nightmares? Total bullshit.”

My frown deepens. “What do you mean ‘bullshit’? Everyone knows what they’re like. They’re brutal. Dangerous.”

“Dangerous to everyone else, maybe,” she says, grinning now. “Not to their mates. One of my Alphas is… well, he’s a Valla, Koa. Not an Alpha”

I blink, the words not registering for a moment. “Wait... what?”

She nods, her smile softening. “Yeah, Ezra. He’s fierce, sure, but he’s also the most loving, doting mate I could’ve asked for. He worships the ground I walk on, Koa. They’re not monsters—not to us. Valla protect what’s theirs. And when it comes to their Omegas? It’s literally against their biology to do anything but cherish and adore them.”

I stare at her, my mind spinning. “So, all the stories about them—about how they abuse their Omegas—”

“Exaggerations,” she cuts in. “Sure, they’re beasts, but that’s only if someone threatens what they love. And honestly? You’ll never be loved better. They’re... intense, but it’s the kind of intense that makes you feel safe. Seen.”

I’ve never heard that version before. Never. The Valla I’ve been taught to fear are nothing like the one she’s describing. For a moment, I let myself imagine it—a love so fierce it burns away every shadow, every scar. But then I shake my head, shoving the thought away.

“It doesn’t matter,” I mutter. “No one will want me anyway. Not when they find out I can’t have babies. It’s the same every year.”

Amelia’s smile falters, but only for a moment. “Koa,” she says softly, “you don’t know that. And even if it’s true, it doesn’t make you any less worthy of love.” I scoff, but she presses on. “Listen to me,” she says firmly. “I know your situation isn’t great, but you’ve always had this... strange kind of luck. Like no matter how bad things get, something always comes through for you. You just have to believe in it. Trust that everything will work out.”

“Maybe,” I whisper, though the doubt lingers.

She smiles, bright and full of hope, as if her belief alone could carry me through tomorrow. “It will, Koa. You’ll see.”

We talk for a little while longer as I push her to show me more of the paradise she’s been stolen away to. She happily bounces between rooms, showing off the lavish curtains and marble floors and dance halls that just don’t make sense. And then the squeals come as one of her mates sweeps her up in his arms, Amelia telling me through giggles that this man is Ezra.

I’m not sure how I never figured it out. He’s so much larger than Amelia’s other mate but we rarely talked about her mates, just that she was mated. Even so, nothing about Ezra screams ‘monster’ or ‘nightmare’ and the way he’s holding her against him is so gentle. However, the kiss he gives her in the next second is the very definition of intense and I quickly end the call as a tendril of heat bleeds through me.

In no world does a love like that wait for me and I’ve made my peace with it. Mostly. I sit up and stretch, frowning when that little bit of heat starts to bloom in the pit of my belly. My heart starts pounding a little faster, my instincts on overdrive as a slow whine peels from my lips. It’s a feeling I’ve staved off for years. What was it about luck because that was bullshit.

“No, no, no,” I whisper, panic clawing at my throat.

I start tearing through my nest, pillows and blankets flying as I search for my heat blockers. They were here. I know they were here. I keep a stash hidden in the corner, wrapped up in an old scarf because Damien would kill me if he found out. But it’s empty. The scarf is there, crumpled and useless, but the blockers are gone.

A cold dread seeps into my chest, cutting through the growing heat. I stumble out of my closet, tears gathering in my eyes, hoping that I just misplaced it somewhere else in the room. Unfortunately, that’s when I realize Carla is standing in my doorway, arms crossed over her chest, her expression a mix of pity and disappointment. Like she’s the long-suffering martyr and I’m the rebellious child who just can’t get her act together.

“What did you do?” My voice is hoarse, shaky. Being on too many blockers for so long, I didn’t even notice her scent in my nest. I should have.

She sighs, exhaustion marring her features. “Stop acting like a child, Koa.”

“Where are they?” I demand, my voice rising. “Where are my meds?”

Her lips press into a thin line. “They’re gone.”

I stare at her, the heat bubbling under my skin making it hard to focus. I forgot how annoying an Omega’s heat is, how impossible it is to do anything other than prop my ass up and beg for a knot. “What do you mean, gone ?”

“You shouldn’t have been taking them in the first place,” she snaps. “It’s not natural. Suppressing your Omega urges—what were you thinking?”

My chest heaves and I dig my nails into my palms to keep from screaming. “I’m thinking that I’m going to go into heat, Carla! Without those meds, I can’t—”

“That’s the point,” she cuts me off, showing the little bit of snark that Damien has yet to snuff out. She steps closer, her gaze hardening. “It’s disgraceful, what you’ve been doing. You’re an Omega, Koa. You’re supposed to have heats. You’re supposed to find a mate and stop fighting what you are. If you would just fall in line, everything would be better. It would have been fine if you had just let things happen the first time and then you would have been happily mated.”

The first time? I glare at Carla, wondering what the fuck she’s talking about. The first time was a disaster. I nearly died, screaming so loud and hard that my voice was hoarse. No one came to save me. No one came to pick me up. I had to do all that on my own, a little Omega—scared and confused about the world around me. “Explain what you mean,” I finally say, my voice shaking. My nose turns up as I clamp my thighs together, trying to keep myself lucid long enough to hear Carla’s explanation.

She lets out an exaggerated sigh, throwing up her hands. “You were just supposed to fall in line.”

“As you keep saying! But explain it to me, Carla. Explain it like I’m that wide-eyed 22-year-old who had the world at her feet, who still believed in true love, who still thought that the world was a nice place. Explain. It. To. Me.” In another minute, Damien will feel Carla’s distress and burst in here but I want to hear it from her.

She whimpers and then it’s over, Damien stalking inside and roughly grabbing me by the throat. “What the fuck did you do to my Omega, Koa?”

“Nothing!” I rasp, grabbing at his hands. Tears stream down my cheeks as I glare up at the snarl on his face. “I just want to know what happened during my first heat because Carla—”

He cackles, roughly jostling me before throwing me onto my bed. “You’re a fucking idiot if you thought an Alpha just chose you that night, Koa. He was perfectly picked for you.”

“He brought his friends!”

“That’s not my problem. What did become my problem is the fact that he threw you back at me for fighting back. You were supposed to submit, Koa. That’s all you’re ever supposed to do. Tonight, you’ll do it. It won’t matter if you fight back or scream or yell for help. You will have an Alpha’s bite in your neck by tomorrow and you will pay your dues. Now, get dressed. We’re leaving in fifteen minutes. Don’t get any funny ideas either. I will drag you out into that car if I have to.” Then he grabs Carla and walks out of my room, leaving me with the realization that he orchestrated my first heat.

The heat that I don’t want to remember.

I thought that being the family’s pawn had been a newer thing but I’ve never been anything more than that. A trading piece. And Damien truly doesn’t care what happens to me. A sob tears from my throat as I crumble to the ground, the heat dissipating as the shock of the moment washes over me. My brother all but sold me that night.

And then left me to pick myself up.

And then fucking blamed me for fighting back.

I slap away the tears, focusing on the one sliver of freedom I have left. Whoever becomes my mate after tonight will be someone I choose, not Damien.