Cursed Love (The Vallaverse)

19. Koa

Koa

Amel was right. I’m pissed that neither Hunter, nor Moses smell like me, which is why I’m currently rubbing my face in Moses’ shirt as we head to my house. He laughs, running a gentle hand down my back as I curl up tighter in his lap. “Sweetheart, are you trying to mark me?”

“You don’t smell like me. This Omega stuff is bullshit. Why do I care if you smell like me?”

“Why did you tell me to take a shower, then?”

I grimace, pausing my efforts to rub my scent all over this man and then continue. “You were sweaty.” My Omega is trying to tell me that she likes our men sweaty but I’m not entertaining those thoughts right now.

“Why do I feel like you would have enjoyed that?” Moses purrs, his hands settling on my waist, fingers playing with the extra skin there. When they dig in just slightly, a gasp falls from my lips in response, my scent spiking ever so slightly.

“Not the point!” I whisper-yell.

We fall into a comfortable silence as I twist around in Moses’ lap, playing with his large hand, threading my fingers through his. They’re so much larger than mine. His palms are calloused, rough from years of work, but his touch is gentle, patient. It’s nice. Really nice.

I don’t even know how I ended up here, how I trusted them so easily. But there’s a quiet kind of safety in the way they’ve moved around me all morning. Moses presses a soft kiss to my forehead, the heat of it lingering as he murmurs, “You seem so new to all of this.”

I tilt my head up, meeting his hazel eyes but there’s no judgment in them. Just curiosity, like he’s genuinely trying to understand me. I let out a soft sigh, my fingers stilling against his as I think about how to explain it.

“I’ve been on blockers since I was twenty-two,” I finally push out. “Heat blockers. Scent blockers. Anything to keep the instincts at bay.”

Moses’ brows furrow, his lips pressing into a thin line as he processes my words. “Why?”

I shrug, my gaze dropping back to our hands, my fingers starting to trace the lines of his palm. “It just… made things easier,” I admit. “It felt better repressing all those instincts and I got used to it. I got used to basically living like a Beta.” I pause, a bitter laugh escaping me. “Even though I was still treated like an Omega.”

Hunter twists around in the front seat, his blue eyes wide with disbelief as he stares at me. “Wait,” he says, his voice laced with concern. “You haven’t had a heat since then? For eight years ?”

My stomach twists and I let out a slow sigh, nodding as I curl tighter into Moses’ chest. The warmth of his arms is the only thing keeping me grounded, but even that can’t stop the tremble that starts to run through me as the memories begin to filter through my mind. Memories I’ve worked so hard to bury. “Yeah,” I say softly, my voice barely above a whisper. “Not since then. I didn’t want to after everything that happened.”

The tension in the car thickens, Hunter’s easy grin wiped away, replaced with something darker. His hands clench into fists as he leans back, his jaw tightening like he’s holding himself back from saying what’s really on his mind.

Moses’ arms tighten around me, his grip protective as his chest rumbles with a low growl. It vibrates against my back, and even though it’s not directed at me, it makes me feel small, vulnerable. I try to pull away, but his arms only tighten further, holding me in place.

Amel’s voice cuts through the heavy silence. “What do you mean by that, Koa?” he asks, his gaze catching mine in the rearview mirror. “You mentioned something similar this morning. What happened?”

I suck in a shaky breath, my heart pounding as I try to find the words. The car feels too small, the air too thick, and I press my face into Moses’ chest, like I can hide from the weight of Amel’s question. But I can’t. The memories are already there, clawing at the edges of my mind, and I know there’s no escaping them now. “My first heat was... a disaster,” I say, my voice trembling. “Everything was dark, and I was confused, and I didn’t know what was happening to me. This Alpha... he promised to help me through it. He said I could trust him.”

I pause, my breath hitching, and Moses’ growl deepens, a low, dangerous sound that makes my skin prickle. His arms tighten even more, like he’s trying to shield me from something, but it’s too late. The memories are already spilling out, one after another, no matter how hard I try to push them back.

“But it didn’t happen that way,” I continue, my voice breaking. “He didn’t help me. He... and his friends…” My throat tightens, the words catching, and I shake my head, burying my face deeper into Moses’ chest. “I didn’t want to just be fodder for someone, or—or a hole to fuck. That’s all I felt like after that. That’s all he—they—made me feel like.”

The car goes deathly quiet, the only sound the faint hum of the engine and my shaky breathing. I can feel all three of them tensing around me, their anger simmering just beneath the surface, their scents so thick I feel like I’m suffocating.

Moses’ growl returns, turning into a low, guttural sound, and I flinch, trying to pull away from him. “Don’t,” I whisper, my voice trembling. “Don’t do that. Don’t get mad. It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“Like hell, it doesn’t,” Moses growls. His arms tighten and I feel him shift slightly, like he’s barely holding himself back.

“Stop,” I say, my voice rising, my hands pushing weakly at his chest. “Please, just stop—”

Amel swerves suddenly, the tires screeching as the car jerks to the side of the road. My breath catches, and the next thing I know, we’re at a complete stop. Then the back door slides open, a panicked squeal tearing from my throat as Amel reaches in and gently extracts me from Moses’ arms.

The safety of his hold is replaced by Amel’s solid frame, his hands steady as they guide me to stand on the gravel. My legs feel shaky, my heart pounding against my ribs like it’s trying to escape.

Behind me, Moses and Hunter are already out of the car, the sound of their growls cutting through the silence like thunder. Hunter’s fists clench at his sides, his blue eyes blazing as he looks around the empty roadside, like he’s expecting someone to step out of the shadows. Moses’ jaw is tight, his hazel eyes burning with barely-contained fury as he growls, “Where is that fucking Alpha?”

Amel whirls on them, his own growl cutting through the air. “Both of you, calm the fuck down,” he snaps. “Now, is not the time to lose your shit.”

I stumble slightly, tears slipping down my face as I try to steady my breathing, try to find my footing. “I—I don’t know,” I cry, my voice cracking. “I don’t know where he is.”

Both brothers freeze at the sound of my voice, their heads snapping down to look at me. The rage in their eyes flickers, replaced by something softer, something almost sheepish as they glance at each other and then back at me.

Hunter scratches the back of his neck, his lips pulling into a crooked, apologetic grin. “Shit, Koa,” he mutters, his voice softer now. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”

Moses steps closer, apologizing as well. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly, his voice rough but earnest. “Just the thought of someone hurting you… it has my blood boiling. I can’t help it.”

As terrified as I am of their reactions, there’s another emotion—happiness. It’s small, just a bit, but not one person has ever been so fiercely appalled at my situation. Most people look at me with disgust that I can no longer have children or they tell me that it was my fault for that night. A few have expressed their condolences but no one has ever wanted to rip that Alpha and his friends apart. I’m terrified but also intrigued about what will happen when I mention that Damien was the cause of all that.

That’s for another time, though. Right now, I’m hanging on by a thread and I need to face my brother. I need to confidently tell him that I’m not coming back, that I’m more than just a stepping stone for the family.

So, I look up at the brothers, letting my face relax. Both of them let out heavy sighs as I step into their embrace, the brothers holding me steady between them. “Thank you,” I whisper.