Chapter 24
As we arrive at the boys’ mansion, the boys hurriedly guide Maddox into Ricky’s surgery room—the very same one where he once saved me. Determined not to leave his side, I quickly wash up, ready to assist Ricky in any way I can. The memories of that terrifying night when they rescued me flood my mind, fueling my determination to return the favor. The weight of guilt sits heavy on my shoulders, knowing that it was my actions that caused his injury. I will never forgive myself if he dies because of me.
A silent sob snags in my chest as I hold Maddox’s hand while Ricky works his magic, meticulously stitching him up to stop the bleeding from the two stab wounds he endured to the chest and stomach.
Alessandro appears in the doorway. “Here, type O-neg like you asked for.” He rushes through the open door and hands Ricky a bag of blood. Maddox bled so heavily while we were trying to deal with Carlo, Ricky knew a transfusion would be the only way to save him. I don’t want to think about where they got it from, some shifty connections they have, but right now, I’m grateful because it could save his life.
With steady hands, Ricky hooks up the IV bag to the stand and prepares the drip. He wipes Maddox’s arm with alcohol, finds a vein, and carefully inserts the needle. The blood begins to flow slowly into his limp body, and I silently pray to whatever god that will listen that it’s going to be enough. I don’t want to think of a world without him in it.
Alessandro leans forward on the counter, his eyes fixed on Ricky. His poker face reveals nothing, but I can sense the undercurrent of worry.
Ricky finishes up covering Maddox’s stab wounds with a bandage then pulls the cotton blanket over his body. “He’s on some pretty heavy sedatives. He won’t be waking up any time soon, baby doll, you can head upstairs to bed if you like.”
I lean down and kiss Maddox’s hand. “I can’t leave him.”
He nods, understanding, and takes a fresh cotton blanket from the cupboard and hands it to me. I wrap it around my shoulders. Sleep is the last of my concerns, even though by now it must be early morning, and the adrenaline has well and truly worn off. My body is exhausted from all the running and fighting, but until I know he’s going to be okay, I don’t care. I have to stay with him.
Ricky moves toward Alessandro. “I’ll call and let you know when he wakes up. Go deal with the clean-up from tonight.”
Alessandro glances my way, rolls his lips as if he wants to say something but is stopping himself, then leaves the room in a huff. I know he blames me, he’s right too. This is all my fault.
Ricky settles down on the opposite end of the bed, sinking into the soft mattress. He’s quiet, too quiet for Ricky. His sad eyes meet mine, and I don’t know whether to hug him or drop down to his feet and beg for forgiveness. I know how much he loves Maddox. He’s not only his brother but his closest friend. The two of them have been through so much together over the years, and it must have nearly killed him to have to operate on him tonight. He doesn’t hide his pain like the others do, and I see how torn up he is. He drops his head, running his hands through his hair, scrubbing them over his handsome face.
I know now how selfish it was running from them. “I’m so sorry, Ricky. I know this is my fault.”
His head rises, his eyes meeting mine. “It’s not your fault you had Carlo after you, but you have to stop running from us. We can only help you if we know where you are.”
“I’m so scared, Ricky,” my voice trembles out. I’m so close to completely breaking down. I have no other explanation for why I took off. All I know is I couldn’t get in that car and go off to some fucking after party, celebrate the madness that went down at the fight tonight. “It was like all the air was being sucked from my lungs, I felt trapped, and I needed to run.” I try to explain my actions, being more honest than I expected. But I need him to know. I need him to forgive me because I can’t forgive myself.
He moves around to my side of the bed and takes my free hand, lacing our fingers together. “I know,” he says, bringing my hand to his lips and placing a soft kiss to the back of it. He doesn’t try and assure me everything is going to be okay. I think we’re past that now. We all know it’s not going to be.
“How do we survive this?”
He looks me over, and I know he’s wondering the same. “We have to work together. Just like we did tonight. As soon as there was a real threat in front of the five of us, we came together, working toward the same cause. It’s the only way.”
I blink back at him, a little taken back. “But Geovani and Alessandro hate each other.”
“They haven’t always. And you have brought us back together. They can work together again,” he tries to reassure me, but I’m not so convinced. I see the way they interact; it might be more lethal for all of us.
I offer him a half smile, wishing that could be true, but I can’t imagine it. He wraps his arm around me and pulls me toward him, the two of us sitting in comfortable silence for a while. My body is dead tired, but I’m not leaving this room until I know Maddox is okay. I watch him taking shallow breaths as the bag of blood drains into him. He’s so pale. My poor wounded hero, offering his life to save me. If he survives, I’m going to make it up to him for the rest of his life, if he will let me.
The alarm for the IV drip goes off, and Ricky stands, moving over to disconnect the bag and seal off the canular.
“What kind of doctor would you have been if you finished medical school?” I ask, dying to know more about him. In all the time we have shared, I never really got to know him, not his hopes and dreams anyway.
“A surgeon.” He sighs heavily, and I feel the weight of his loss.
“Can you go back and finish?” I ask, more hopeful. “I have money now; I could pay whatever it cost so you can get your degree and be a real doctor,” I suggest, wondering what’s stopping him.
“If only it were that simple, baby girl. There is no going back for me. Enzo made sure of it. I have a criminal record now. No medical school in their right mind would accept me. Enzo knew what he would be losing if I finished my residency and became a surgeon. I’m sure he was the reason I got caught doing one of our jobs in the first place. And instead of him using his connections like he would normally for one of his own to bail me out, I was charged.”
Oh shit. Enzo is fucking unbelievable. The more I hear about that man the more my hate grows for him. “He set you up?”
He shrugs. “I can’t prove anything, but I know how he felt about it. He used to say, sure, get your degree, it will be useful for the family. Dammit, he knew I wanted to help people, use my talents for good, not evil, and when he heard I had the top cardiovascular surgeon in the country requesting me to work with him in New York, he made sure I would never get the chance.”
My skin prickles with fury for him. How dare Enzo take that away from him. His own son. He’s a motherfucking narcissist. “Why did you stay working for the family? You all know Enzo is pure evil. Why not escape, go to New York? Or anywhere.”
“The only way any of us are getting out of Ravens Hollow is in a body bag.” His head drops, sadness filling him. “After what we did tonight, our days are numbered, we all know it.”
“Because you told Enzo you’re not under his rule anymore?”
He nods.
I stand in a rush, sickness overwhelming me. “I’m not worth it. Why would you paint a target on your backs for me?” I cry, unable to help it. This is all too much.
I can feel the bond between us intensify as our eyes meet. There is this undeniable pull I have to all four of them. I don’t understand it or even want it to be true, and something tells me they all feel the same. But it’s there, and I already know they would do anything for me. So, we can spend however little time we have left together. “It’s so much more complicated than you, baby, but you have to know you are worth it. The four of us would do anything for you.”
The four of them. My boys. He’s right, I witnessed it tonight firsthand. They would risk their own lives to save me. All of them did when they could have just handed over the girl who’s been nothing but a pain in their asses since all this madness started. I don’t know what it is with all of us, but there is a connection here that runs deeper than the money and power I know they all crave. I don’t understand it, but all I know is I feel it every time I’m near them. It’s like an invisible chain linking us all together. Even after the fight when I ran because I was scared, I sat in that alleyway feeling sick over the thought of never seeing them again. Maybe that’s why I let Maddox catch me. I knew there was never really going to be a way to escape them, because my heart is linked to all of theirs.
Even through all the trouble that’s gone down, I have found something I never could have imagined. Unconditional love. My papa never would have protected me the way these men have. My mother only ever cared about him, and she proved it, leaving me to fend for myself when I was just a child. My brother has done all he can to take care of me, and I know we will always have a special bond because of the nightmare our papa forced upon us. With the guys, I know no matter what, they will do everything within their power to protect me. All this time I have been fighting against them thinking they were out to get me. Thinking they would let me down like my papa did. There is no denying the hard evidence right in front of me. From now on, as much as it makes my stomach churn, I have to trust them.
Ricky checks Maddox over again, doing his observations every fifteen minutes. If anything, I think it’s to keep himself busy. I can empathize with him. It’s frustrating to sit here, staring at him, wishing he would wake up, feeling utterly powerless. Maddox hasn’t moved since Ricky operated, and I know it’s normal for someone who’s on such a big dose of sedatives, but still, I need him to open his eyes. I need to know he’s going to be okay.
I squeeze his hand tightly. “I’m so sorry, Maddox,” I mutter. “Please be okay.”