Dangerously Yours (Titans of Chicago #3)

NOAH

A few weeks had passed since I was released from Northwestern Memorial and the physical trauma I’d endured was healing up nicely. Not only did I have the best medical staff at my disposal, but I was also using a former trainer from my team during my rehab.

Cade Davis had been arrested for the attempt on my life, and thankfully not even his Titan status could get him out on bail. He was rotting away in a cell where he should stay the rest of his natural life, although I knew that was doubtful. His title and resources would ensure he received a much more lenient sentence than someone outside of our ranks. That was one of the things that scared me the most.

Lulu had been overcompensating for everything because she truly did believe herself to be at fault. So, she had thought the initial attempt on her life had been an accident. I don’t know that I would have thought anything differently about it at the time. It was so much easier to point fingers and fall down the ‘what if’ categories, but I wouldn’t allow myself to do it, and I had no intention of entertaining her as she did it, either.

She also never anticipated that her ex-husband would become so unhinged. I had known of the man my entire life, and I never thought that he would either. No one really knew what another was capable of until they were pushed too hard or too much. My relationship with Lulu had evidently been what triggered Cade to do what he did to me, and I was still thankful to this day that I had been in that car instead of her. Still, as I stared at the screen and watched my team as they took the field, there were also moments where my anger at the other male knew no bounds. I should have been out there with my guys. Instead, I would spend the rest of my life watching them helplessly from my couch.

“You think they might get their first win today?” Daxon asked after the national anthem was sung.

“I hope so. I placed a friendly wager on the game with some staff at UC,” Callum added.

“Why in the hell would you do that?” I asked Cal, and he, along with Gabriel and Daxon, looked over at me.

“I often bet on these games, Noah. You know that.”

It was the fourth game of the season and we were the only winless team in the league. For a season that held so much promise, the accident had taken away the team’s swagger and confidence, and it was honestly hard to watch. I likely wouldn’t have even turned the game on had my friends not been here, and had Romeo not been out on the field. For such a woeful start for the team, his individual statistics were already better than they were this time last year.

“That’s because the run game is all we fucking have,” Gabe muttered in response to the statement I hadn’t even realized I said out loud.

“Ro is killing it, and if he keeps it up, he’s going to be a lock for all-pro,” Daxon added.

“And considering he is our only offense, I hedged my bets on him today. Besides, the opponent has the worst run defense in the league, and I’m banking on Ro rushing for over a buck fifty,” Callum replied.

“I should have been out there,” I said, then grabbed one of the beers.

“Everything happens for a reason. Fox and ESPN have both had reps on my line asking about you. Have you given any further thought to the next steps now that your playing career is over, Noah?”

I ignored Gabriel, and I kept my eyes focused on the large screen in my theater room. While I knew my friend was only trying to help, even entertaining the idea of going into broadcasting would be like admitting defeat and accepting that I would never run out onto the field or call a play in the huddle like the guy who had been my back-up for the past three years was doing right now.

The huddle broke and as they lined up, I immediately noticed the mismatch between our tight end and their linebacker. If Joe could get the ball where it needed to be, we would be starting this game with a first down. It would have to be better than the last game against the defending champions where it had taken midway through the third to accomplish that feat. The ball was snapped, and once the quarterback had it, we collectively groaned. Joe hadn’t seen what we did, and he had instead handed it off to the fullback who didn’t even get back to the line of scrimmage.

“This is almost too painful to watch,” Daxon remarked when the next play resulted in a seven yard sack.

“Okay, third and eighteen. I can’t believe I’m actually praying for a penalty.”

The others chuckled as they agreed with Gabriel. Not me. I stayed focused on the screen and needed Joe to just hand the ball off to our best player. Spotting Romeo on the field, I willed the play to happen the way it should, and once the ball was snapped, I slammed back the rest of that can of beer. Our dunce of a quarterback was looking for a big chunk of yardage and ended up not only taking a four yard sack, but he also fumbled.

“Fuck,” Callum swore and we all turned to him. “I had bet a few grand that we would score on the first drive.”

“That’s because you’re a fucking idiot,” I told him.

Had he not watched any of the previous games this year?

I almost wished that I hadn’t, especially when the first play back after a commercial, the other team ran the ball in for a twelve yard touchdown. “This is torture,” I said, then got up to go retrieve us something stronger than the locally made craft beer Daxon had brought with him.

As I started to return back to my friends, my steps slowed. I remembered the very last time I had been in here. It had been that night with Lulu. Suddenly, the guys in the broadcast booth and my friend’s voices were all silenced by the remembered sounds of my girl as she came on my cock. Football hadn’t been the only thing I had given up since the shooting. I had also not had sex once, even though I knew that I could. Just last night, I had the perfect opportunity to do so when Lulu offered to go down on me when I was at her house. I had declined the offer and instead had her sit on my face, where I ate her out for an orgasm or two.

Other than our sex life, things between her and I were the same. I still loved her so damn much, and I tried to spend as much time as I could with her. It had been awkward when she had first introduced me to her children, and as a friend. Zachary had been thrilled, and couldn’t wait to go share the news with all of his friends, but the girls had been far harder to impress.

Leslie had come around after we watched a few movies together, but Amanda had been the hardest to break through. She was devastated over the news of what her father had done, and I think she secretly blamed Lulu for the events. The girl had never come right out and said it, but I could see it in the way she would look at her mother. The next time I saw her though, she was smiling and very congenial.

“She actually told me this morning that she’s glad you’re here,” Lulu had told me that day.

“I’m glad because I haven’t had to work this hard to impress a teenage girl since I was in middle school.”

Since that day, things on that front had improved as well, so I didn’t know why I was so reluctant to pick back up where we had left off before everything had gone down.

“Fuck yes,” Daxon cursed, and I pushed my thoughts deep into my head, and looked at the screen.

There on the sideline doing one of his popular dances was our Titan friend. It looked like Joe had finally figured out what we all knew and had handed the ball off to our bell cow. CBS showed a replay, and I was proud of Romeo as he juked a defender, then had two others in chase as he broke off a sixty three yard touchdown run. Even when I had been on the field, Romeo always made it look so easy.

“Another fourteen and he will have set the all-time rushing record through the first five games of the season,” Callum noted.

I set the vodka down, then took my seat. “Romeo is a special talent.”

“We would’ve been undefeated if you were out there,” Gabe remarked, and I didn’t miss the look that Daxon shot him.

“Things happen for a—” my therapist friend started to say until I cut him off.

“Yeah, and those reasons fucking suck. I had finally proven my worth after busting my ass through training camp and the entire preseason, but for what? I was so worried about being either traded or cut. I suppose I should have considered the possibility of being shot as well.”

The guys grew silent until Daxon spoke once more. “No one could have seen that coming. Or that your playing career is over. It only means that you’re meant for something bigger and greater than playing.”

“Whatever it is, I don’t want it.” I grabbed one of the nearby shot glasses, then filled it to the brim with vodka. After slamming it back, I barely even winced at the burn as it slid down my throat. I was already pouring another when Callum shot me a look of disapproval. “What, Cal?”

“Every time I’ve seen you since you’ve been discharged, you’re drinking. I know that you might not want to talk to this Bozo...” he paused to point toward Daxon, then quickly continued. “But I think you need to talk to someone.”

“I don’t need counseling,” I said, and the others stayed quiet. I could see the concern on their faces, especially when I slammed back the second shot.

“Nicole thought the same thing after her trauma, but she has truly benefited from it,” Cal replied.

“And Harper, too. The things that girl went through...”

When Gabriel’s voice trailed off, I knew he was right. Harper had shared some of her past with us, especially me and Charlie since we were all close friends growing up. Her uncle and cousin had been horrible to her, and Nicole had fared badly herself when another student developed an unhealthy obsession with her.

“It’s not the same,” I said. “Gabe might have lost his mind for a while, and Cal his job, but both have gotten those things back, but not me. It hurts like hell to see my team out there struggling without me, and knowing there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it. It’s driving me fucking insane, but I need to keep pushing through this because I refuse to accept that this is the end of my playing career.”

“But it is,” Callum solemnly noted.

I shook my head vehemently. “No, it is not.”

“I know what you’re going through, Noah. If you remember, I was supposed to join you at Ohio State, but we all know what happened on graduation night.”

Our friend had gone out of his mind and left a party where he had been drinking heavily. Not long after, he had wrapped his brand new Lamborghini around a telephone pole. He, too, had significant injuries and like me, he was also lucky enough to have walked away from the crash at all. If any of these men would understand what I was going through, it would be him, but I couldn’t take the same advice I had given him in the hospital afterward.

“Sure it sucks that you can’t play anymore, but you’re going to do some great things in life.”

I had meant it when I had said it to him, but I was struggling to apply it to my own life. Football had been all I had ever wanted to do, and now it had been viciously taken away from me in the blink of an eye. Others went through the same things as me everyday, but I selfishly was only thinking about myself. It was likely the reason I had been wallowing in my own self-pity since being discharged.

“Even if you’re not sure whether this is what you might want to do next, why don’t you at least come on for a guest segment or two. Others that have season-ending injuries do it all the time,” Gabriel told me.

I knew he was right, but... “If I do that, then I am admitting to myself that my playing career is over.”

“It is over, Noah. You have to accept it and find a way to move on or else it is going to eat you alive,” Callum seconded.

“It’s all I ever wanted to?—”

“Fourth and goal and only seconds on the clock. Seaton takes it from the nine yard line, and he makes a man miss. Easy score, and his team’s on top fourteen to seven heading into the half,” the broadcaster said, and we all turned to watch our friend.

When Romeo scored the touchdown, he abandoned his own usual celebration, and instead did mine. After, he pounded his chest in the exact same spot where I had been shot. I knew he had done it for me, and the others did, too. Daxon clapped me on the back, and Gabe and Cal both fist-bumped me. The players then were filing off the field, and one of the sideline reporters stopped to talk to Romeo.

“Your last celebration, was there something different behind it?”

“Absolutely,” Romeo replied. “My brother, Noah, couldn’t be out here with me physically, but I know he’s here in spirit.”

“Speaking of your former quarterback, how has the transition been to Joe Robbins after playing your entire career with Noah?”

“Man, Joe is a dog, but Noah, he’s my brother.” He then looked into the camera directly. “I know you’re watching man, and I just want you to know that I’m dedicating this entire season to you. We all are. Heal up, my friend. I can’t wait to see you one day pacing along the sidelines.”

One of the slot receivers stopped, said something to Romeo, then the two headed to the locker room. I drank the third shot I had poured earlier, then leaned back in my chair. It hit me in that moment that I had been afraid the team would forget me. Out of sight, out of mind. These guys though, much like the ones sitting in my theater room, were my brothers. They put their bodies on the line for me, play after play, much like I had put mine on the line for the woman I love. My playing career might be over, but what I very easily could have lost would have been something I never could get back. I closed my eyes and realized that while I might not have blamed her for any of this, I had been acting differently toward her, and it filled me with shame.

I wanted to send the guys home then have Lulu come over, but a few hours wouldn’t make a difference. The danger to her was off the street, and we had our entire lives to talk. I had been stuck in self-loathing, but I was now seeing all the things I still had in this life, which included friends and the love of a damn good woman. I reopened my eyes and looked over at Gabriel.

“Hey, reach out to ESPN and set up one of those guest spots.”

Daxon patted my leg as if to tell me that he was proud of me, then Callum handed over the box of pizza. I hadn’t even heard the doorbell, but he had. When we all had a slice in our hand, the game came back on, and this time, we started the third quarter getting a turnover. After the interception, Romeo did what he does best, and it wasn’t long before the four of us were celebrating his next score right along with him.