28. Chapter 28
The remaining months until planetfall passed quickly. Dare moved in with Jason, with the proviso that he has a room set aside just for him. Jason”s carefully masked look of vulnerability caused him to explain why.
”Jason, I see and connect mentally every day with my clients. Sometimes…I need to be alone, to recharge, and renew myself. I am not doing this to upset you, but to care for myself. I promise to sleep with you every night, but I will need time each week to do this.”
The older man ducked his head, his face flushed. ”I didn”t know that loving another…that loving you would make me want to be with you all the time. I know you need time to yourself–I do, too, sometimes.” He shook his head. ”I”m being stupid, so ignore me.”
The empath reached out to take his hand. ”You”re not being stupid–you are showing me how you feel. I feel that pull to you all the time as well, but my work mitigates it, not to mention my concern for those I counsel. Never feel sorry that you share how you feel with me. I consider it a gift that you do.”
”I”ll remind you of that when you feel I”m too much to manage.”
Dare grinned. ”Try harder then. I don”t think I”ll ever feel that way.” He leaned in, giving his lover a kiss.
Jason sighed, smiling. ”That”s good–I”m a handful.”
The Mindset gave him a lascivious smile. ”And then some.”
The empath usually ate lunch with Jason, although he met up with Riis and Mike at least weekly. Dare still went to the poker games, taking his dampers to make sure no one objected. Having friends was a novelty, and he wanted to cultivate those relationships. Jason declined to attend, and the Mindset didn”t push him. Jason felt he had a position to uphold and did so. Dare was just glad to know more people who liked him for who he was.
Finishing his meal, Dare leaned back in his chair, giving his love a thoughtful glance. Jason took his last bite and wiped his mouth on a serviette before looking up. ”What? Am I wearing some food?”
The empath shook his head. ”What? No, of course not. I was just thinking we needed to make an appointment with the captain. He doesn”t know I”m staying with the ship and you. We should tell him formally, don”t you think?”
His expression wry, the other man nodded. ”I”m sure he”s heard the gossip, and equally sure he knows from his own inquiries. You”re right, though. We should tell him ourselves.” The older man shifted in his chair. ”While we”re sort of on the subject, I need to let you know what my plan is to free us both from my family. I am going to contact my father and make him an offer. He can give me this ship, not touch my investments and holdings, and forget he ever heard your name. In return, I will not release sensitive information about family dealings to every news outlet. That information will be sent to several reputable outlets and my attorney, to be released in the event of any injury or death of either of us prior to my conversation with him. No, I don”t trust him, and doubt I ever will.”
Dare”s eyes widened in amazement. ”I know you”ve been estranged from them, but I didn”t think you”d go this far to protect me. Are you sure?”
Jason”s dark eyes warmed at his lover”s consternation. ”I”m very sure. Being a Stravetta has meant nothing but pain to me. Couple that with how they would treat you, and it”s easy to tell them to fuck off. I won”t let anyone hurt you, Dare, you know that. I”ve already given the captain heads up on this. He”s on board. I”ll contact dear old dad once we”re close enough to Earth. I don”t plan to go down there, and you”ve never been on board per the captain, so no one should be looking for you, except my family.”
Dare was silent, searching Jason”s face, before looking down at his hands, tightly clasped in his lap. ”I don”t know what to say. I thought that we”d have the trip back and then I”d have to hide again, or your family would take me away. I never thought–never dreamed–you”d give up your family for me, despite your problems with them.”
”You decided to stay with me, thinking I would let my family take you? Dare, I love you! I would never allow that to happen. How could you think that?”
The younger man ducked his head, his face pale. ”No one has ever cared so much for me that they”d give up everything. I know you love me, but I guess I still thought…”
Jason”s expression hardened as he took Dare”s hands in a tight grip. ”You are not expendable or just a fancy on my part. Listen to me carefully, Mindset, and believe what I say: I will never let you go unless you ask me to. I will protect you with all my resources, and my life, if necessary. I love you and want to be with you for the rest of our lives. Never think that I will use you for my own ends, or not respect your wishes and needs. Do you believe me?”
The empath stared down at their clasped hands. ”I must, for that is how I feel about you. It”s hard for me, J, to trust, you know that.”
”I will keep showing you, then, every day until you know and understand what I feel for you and would give you.”
Dare glanced up, his eyes brimming with tears. Jason made an indistinct sound, pulling him into his arms. ”This is what love feels like, and that love will protect you, too.”
The empath, held in his lover”s arms, unwillingly let himself believe.
Lying in Jason”s arms that night, Dare could not rest. His lover, firmly snuggled around him, had kissed the back of his neck, expressed his love, and shortly thereafter, fell asleep. The empath lay there, his mind whirling, unable to settle his thoughts.
How was it he could acknowledge acceptance from his friends and the crew, but not realize that Jason would extend that and more to him? True, no one had ever loved him to that extent, or been willing to let go of long held assets for him. No one had given up their family, no matter how awful they were.
The young empath sighed, feeling Jason”s arms tighten even in his sleep. He loved this man, felt connected to him even when he was misbehaving. Dare smiled into the darkness. Jason loved him, and would continue to love him, into a forever the Mindset could not imagine. The older man did not think of him as disposable or replaceable. He let that thought, that feeling, settle into him, and finally accepted it as truth. Jason cared for him more than anyone ever had and would do whatever he must to safeguard him. It was a frightening thought to be so tied to another, but it was also glorious.
Placing his hands over Jason”s as the other man spooned him, Dare knew, at last, he had found a home.