32. Brennan
thirty-two
Brennan
A Bit Later
I can’t believe I’ve held it together for so long.
Tonight’s the big night and my heart is thumping so loud, I’m surprised Astrid can’t see it through my shirt.
She and I sit on a private lanai at Spago at the Four Seasons in Wailea, where we’re staying. The warm Maui breeze drifts through the air carrying the scent of plumeria and sea salt. We made the sunset and it’s stunning. The sky is painted in shades of pink and orange. The waves are a gentle, soothing soundtrack in the background.
I can’t take my eyes off Astrid.
She sits across from me. Candlelight flickers and highlights the warm glow on her bronze skin. Of course she looks divine in a white, off-the-shoulder sundress, which flows softly over her frame. It hugs her in all the desirable places, showing off her tan and delicate cleavage. Gold jewelry—a dainty necklace and bracelet catch the light. The ocean breeze teases loose a strand of her hair from her low ponytail.
She’s radiant underneath the Hawaiian stars.
Tonight, everything should be perfect. I’ve planned every detail, including the meal. The waiters are discreet yet attentive. The setting is flawless and I’ve never been this nervous in my life.
But I’m ready.
I’m sure.
The appetizer course arrives, Bigeye Ahi Poke Cones, which are crisp tempura shells filled with a mix of raw tuna marinated in sesame, miso, and a hint of ginger. Astrid picks one up and takes a small, delicate bite. Her eyes light up. “These are almost too pretty to eat, but holy hell are they good.”
I feel a sense of relief wash over me. So far, so good.
“Wait for what’s next,” I say before downing mine in two bites.
We move on to Hotate Scallop Crudo. Thin slices of scallop with a tangy lime vinaigrette, topped with slivers of Fresno chili. Astrid closes her eyes as she tastes it, savoring every bite. Watching her enjoy what I’ve ordered makes me feel so happy.
It’s all I want to do. Make her happy. My new focus. My forever focus.
“You’re spoiling me.” She opens her eyes to catch my gaze. “I could get used to this.”
I smile happily. “That’s the idea.”
Each course feels like a step closer to a moment I’ve been planning for weeks. The Seafood Red Thai Coconut Curry is next—a fragrant, spicy mix of Kaua’i prawns, Mahi Mahi, and scallops in a rich coconut broth.
Astrid takes a spoonful and her eyes widen with delight. “Brennan, this is amazing. How did you plan this?”
“I’ve got my ways.” I wink at her.
She laughs heartily, filling me with pure happiness. I’ve missed seeing her this relaxed and joyful. Like all the times we played pool at The Zoo. Over the past year we’ve had too much stress and now it all seems worth it. Everything is falling into place.
As the evening progresses, the courses keep coming. Broiled Miso Marinated Walu, a tender and flaky white fish balanced with a hint of sesame and fresh cucumber. Next, a glazed Gouchujang Pork Shank melts in our mouths.
Astrid leans back in her chair, content. “I don’t think I can eat another bite.” She pats her flat stomach. “And, I don’t want this night to end.”
“Good.” I signal to the server. “We’re not quite done.”
He returns, carrying a tray with one final course. A Chocolate Porter Cake, which is close to what Astrid ordered for my birthday. This version is dark-chocolate cake soaked in porter beer, layered with semi-sweet ganache. It’s decadent. Almost sinful.
When Astrid sees it, her eyes light up. I know she felt bad about bringing a similar version to my family gathering, but I’ve been obsessed with it. So fucking good.
“You’re something else, B,” she beams. “I don’t care how full I am. We’re finishing this.”
I watch closely as she takes a bite. Her eyes flutter closed in pure bliss. She’s everything I ever wanted. More than I dreamed of. When she whispers, “I love you,” I know it’s time.
“Astrid.” My voice catches slightly but I stand up on wobbly legs and reach into my pocket. My hands tremble a bit because never, in a million years, did I hope to meet my person. “There’s something I need to ask you tonight.”
She blinks up at me with confusion. Then it dawns on her and her entire face lights up. “What are you—”
Before she can finish, I’m down on one knee in front of her. Presenting the seven-carat ring I’ve had for over a year. A vintage diamond set in platinum with intricate filigree detailing, making it look timeless and unique. Exactly like Astrid. The diamond catches the light from the lanterns around us and sparkles brilliantly.
She gasps, her hands fly to her mouth. “ Brennan .”
“Astrid.” I try to keep my voice steady despite the pounding of my heart. “You are the most incredible person I’ve ever met. You make me better, you make me braver, and you make me want to be the man you deserve. I can’t imagine life without you in it, and I don’t want to. I want to share everything with you—the good, the bad, the successes, and even the failures. I want to build my future with you. So…will you marry me?”
For a second I think she’s going to turn me down because she bursts into tears. I’m terrified—is marrying me so terrible? But, wait. She’s nodding and reaching for me. Finally a smile breaks across her face and she eeks out a breathless, “ Yes . Yes. YES.”
Her acceptance is barely out of her mouth before I’ve wrapped her in my arms and lifted her from the ground and swung her around. She grips my face and kisses me hard. It feels like the world is spinning and standing still all at once.
When we separate and the surroundings come back into focus, we notice the waiters are applauding and whooping. Astrid blushes, burying her face in my shoulder.
I can’t stop smiling. I don’t think I’ve ever been this happy.
She holds out her hand and I slip the ring on to her finger. It fits perfectly. Like it was made for her. “It’s incredibly beautiful.” She’s choked up. “Wait, is this…?”
“Yeah, it’s the ring you admired last year in Palm Springs. The moment I saw it, I knew it was yours. After you went back to Seattle, I bought it thinking I’d propose last year. But, with all the legal shit happening…” I brush a strand of hair from her face. “I didn’t want to propose until we were through it.”
Astrid’s eyes are filled with so much love. I feel my heart swell. “I can’t believe we’re engaged. I can’t believe this is real.”
“Well, it is.” I hold her hand up to the light. “Smooth sailing from this point forward.”
On cue, a man begins to play a Hawaiian love song on the ukulele. We sway together to the sound with the waves crashing softly in the background. The moon shines down on us. It’s perfect. I’m not worried about the future. I’m happy to be in the present with the love of my life, knowing our lives together will be beautiful.
“I love you.” She looks up at me, caressing the hair at my nape. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too.” I lean down to kiss her again. “I promise I’m going to spend the rest of my life proving it to you.”