Delirium (Captive Love: Forced Proximity Standalones #4)

Chapter 24

Chapter

Twenty-Four

JAMES

“ I fear I’ve made a mess.”

I stared at Camp, fear racing through me not for the first time today. Something was seriously, seriously wrong, and hadn’t been right since we left the city—maybe even before that.

I looked at Nash next to me, who looked just as pale as I felt.

“Something isn’t right,” I muttered, looking to Nash for confirmation.

He nodded, not taking his eyes off Camp. “I think something is wrong with all of us,” he said.

Camp still stood, frozen in his doorway, hair askew, eyes wild like a rabid animal. “I fear I’ve made a mess,” he repeated.

“Camp, buddy, listen to me, okay?” Nash soothed, taking a step toward him, and then another. “It’s going to be okay. I promise. We’re just going to get you into the sick bay.”

“No!” Camp stumbled back into his room, clinging to the doorframe. “No. You’re a ghost. I’m seeing things. I’m dreaming. I’m dreaming. You’re dead. You’re a ghost, because you're dead. I just saw James kill you!”

My mouth fell open, the pieces finally falling into place. I wasn’t sure what would make Camp see an entire scene play out in front of him that hadn’t happened, but I had a sinking feeling it was the same thing that made me have entire fucking sex dream about Scarlett. My cock still ached when I thought about that dream, but right now was not the time to reminisce.

Nash looked at me frantically. “Go get Scarlett. Now. If what’s happening is what I think it is, she shouldn’t be alone. Besides, she might be able to get through to him and break him out of whatever trance he’s in.”

I nodded, turning back toward the wheelhouse where I’d last seen Scarlett. As I left, I heard Nash’s soothing voice, doing his best to calm Camp. “Listen man, I know it probably sounded scary from inside the room, but James and I were just arguing. No one is dead. I swear…”

I still wasn’t feeling great from whatever hit me last night, but I made my way as quickly as I could to Scarlett. She still sat in the chair where we’d left her, feet propped up, staring forlornly at the rainforest. One look at my face and she sprang to her feet.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“It’s Camp. He’s not well. I think he’s hallucinating or something. He…he thinks I killed Nash. It’s crazy. I don’t know.” She followed closely on my heels back to the cabins.

Camp was almost completely back in his room now, nearly ensconced by the shadows. “I don’t believe in ghosts. You need to leave me the fuck alone.”

Nash looked back in relief when he heard us approach. “Oh, thank fuck. I almost had him, and then I said the wrong thing and spooked him all over again.”

“What do I do?” Scarlett asked. “Tell me what to do to help him.”

“You’re going to have to snap him out of it. He’s in a dream-like state. Shocking him out of it is one way, but considering shock is what put him into it, it might not be the best choice of action.” Nash shrugged, turning his gaze back to Camp. “He has a strong connection with you, though. Reminding him of that might be strong enough to break whatever his mind is telling him.”

Scarlett approached the doorway slowly. “Hey, Camp. Hey, baby. You doing okay?”

Camp turned to her voice, immediately relaxing. “Scarlett. Do you see him, too? Do you see the ghost?”

“Baby, there is no ghost. You’re dreaming. Nash is right here in front of me. Alive. No one is dead. No one is a ghost.” She smiled, taking another step closer. “You gotta shake yourself out of this. Who else is going to bake me a banana rum cake?”

“Banana rum cake…” Camp’s eyes drifted off. “I think I remember.”

“Think hard,” Scarlett whispered. “Think real hard for me.”

“But the ghosts…”

“There’s no ghosts, baby.”

Camp blinked, his hands dropping from the doorframe. He looked shaken, but like himself again. Like he was in control of his body. “Scarlett?”

She nodded, closing the distance, standing on her tiptoes and pressing her hands on either side of his face. “I’m here. You’re good. You were just lost for a minute, but now you’re back.”

The intimacy of the moment rocked through me, breaking my heart a little bit more, until I had to look away. Why couldn’t that be me?

“I had a dream,” Camp whispered. “I had a dream and then I thought I woke up, but I don’t think I woke up.”

“You’re awake now. It’s okay.” She held his face in her hands, turning toward Nash. “What’s going on?”

“Well…” He hesitated. “A lot of things out here can cause delusion and hallucinations. But they’re usually edible, and I can’t imagine any of us picking some random mushroom up and stuffing it in our mouths. Which leaves us with diseases. I wasn’t sure at first, but when I saw James sweating, I had my assumptions. You were on fire last night, too, Scarlett. And then you mentioned James’ dream, and combined how with Camp is acting today…”

I shot a glare at Scarlett. Had she actually spilled my embarrassing secret that quickly? She mouthed an apology over her shoulder.

“Just spit it out, Nash. What do you think the problem is?”

“Malaria. I think we all have malaria. It’s transmitted via mosquitoes. All the symptoms add up, the weird dreams, the hallucinations, the way we’re all sweating, all exhausted.” He paused with a grimace. “There’s a cure.”

“But?” I snapped. “I’m assuming there’s a but here by your expression, and I really don’t know if I want to hear it.”

“I’m all out of the meds needed to treat it. I needed to restock when I docked for the season, and seeing as I thought this would be a quick trip, I didn’t bother. Added to the fact I couldn’t get the motor working, and well…we seem to be in a bit of a predicament.”

“You couldn’t get the boat started?” Scarlett’s voice was calm, but more dangerous than I’ve ever heard it. “How the hell are we going to get this medication then?”

Nash ran a hand through his hair, shifting his weight from side to side. “Like I said this morning. We hike. I have all the gear. It should only be a couple days at most until we find a village with enough supplies to give us a hand.”

She blinked, dropping Camp’s face to cross the hall and stand in front of Nash. “You think we can hike in this state? It’s bad enough Camp thought James fucking killed you in a contained environment. What do you think it’s going to be like out there in the rainforest? How are we going to stay safe?”

“Darling, I don’t think we have a choice.” Nash looked around at each of us. “We can stay and wait for rescue, but it’s iffy at this time of year. Nobody wants to chance the rainy season. Or we can make a move and try to save ourselves. I know what my choice is. I’m going to get packed up, and be ready to move out at first light tomorrow.”

Scarlett pressed her fingers into her eyes. “This isn’t happening. This can’t be happening. I just wanted an adventure. Not this nightmare.”

“Do you think we’re cursed?” For the first time since we’d all begun arguing, Camp spoke up. “I know curses are stupid and not real and whatever else, but do you think we were cursed stepping into that city and this is our punishment?”

“Curses aren’t real.” I left no room for argument in my voice. “I don’t care how weird that city was, or why Clancy wasn’t there, or why my workers were missing, but I’m sure they have a damn good, logical, reason. Everything else is just shit bad luck.”

I didn’t miss the quiet look Scarlett shot me, the one that said she wasn’t buying it.

“We stay here and hope for the best, and hope none of us get sicker in the meantime, or we hike it out,” Nash repeated.

I was over the back and forth. I was over the Carpe Diem . I was over this goddamn rainforest, jungle, whatever the fuck you wanted to call it. “There isn’t an option. You said yourself, it might be weeks before someone comes. None of us can trust our senses anymore. We need to get out of here, as soon as we can. We hike out tomorrow. I don’t like it any more than any of you do, but we don’t have a choice.” I looked around at everyone, waiting to see if anyone argued with me, but I only saw resolved expressions, and firm nods.

“Everyone, pack your shit. Pack lightly, only the essentials, because you’re going to have to carry whatever you bring. We’re moving out at first light. I’ll grab the tent and other supplies out of storage.” Nash jerked his head toward me. “Want to give me a hand?”

I hesitated for a moment, wondering if this was some kind of trap. But this was Nash. As contentious as our relationship was, he wouldn’t try to make things worse. “Yeah.”

“You guys good?” he asked Scarlett.

She nodded, and he gestured for me to follow him.

The small room overflowed with random gear and boxes, exactly how I thought the inside of Nash’s head would look like. I picked up a random rock, perfectly smooth and round, wondering what the significance could be.

“Heads up.” Nash tossed a thin sleeping bag across the room at me, and then another. Two more followed, and then he appeared through the shambles carrying a tent that looked far too small to fit all of us, and a clanging bag of pots and pans. “I’ll get up early in the morning and get the food ready, but this should be good enough to get us out.”

I raised my brow, staring at the thin tent bag, barely longer than my forearm. “Are you sure that’s a four-person tent?”

Nash laughed. “Haven’t you ever seen a hiking tent before? I promise, it might be a bit snug, but it’ll fit all of us.”

Great. Exactly what I needed, to be cuddled up next to the fucking lovesick puppies, inches away from their infatuation. Sounded exactly like my idea of a good time. I looked away, not wanting to picture it anymore.

“I wanted to talk to you.” I couldn’t avoid the conversation any longer, not if we were all going to be stuffed like sardines into the tiny ass tent he held.

“Okay.” He leaned against a stack of boxes, dropping the tent at his feet. “Talk. You have my full attention.”

“I’m sorry for what happened. At the waterfall. I was angry, and I was…” I trailed off, not wanting to say what came next. The word was lodged in my heart, immovable as a boulder.

“Jealous,” Nash finished.

I shot him a glare, and then sighed. “Fine. Yes. I was jealous.” I really didn’t like the way the word felt in my mouth. It didn’t fit, leaving a scar I’d rather not acknowledge. “I was jealous she looked at you that way, that she trusted you enough to touch her. I was so fucking jealous I couldn’t see straight. But as much as we’ve had our problems, it really wasn’t right of me to say what I said. It wasn’t my place. And I’m…”

“Sorry.” Nash shrugged, giving me a crooked grin, the one that drew the girls in when we were young, before life hit us hard. “It’s okay. Really. I was pissed when it first happened, but it felt good to get it out in the open.”

I blinked. “You’re over it just like that?”

Nash laughed. “Would you rather I be like you, and held a grudge for the next century? Not my style. There’s no point letting something weigh me down when it doesn’t need to.” He clapped a hand on my shoulder, the sudden touch surprising me, and for the first time in a decade I looked into his eyes. I found no malice there, only honesty. “Look. James. You did a shitty thing. It’s in the past now. And, you know what? I understand why you did it. I was jealous, too, before. All those times I saw her with Camp, it felt like my heart was going to explode. What I’ll tell you is this—don’t ruin something good by being afraid of the consequences. Let your walls down for once in your life.”

I knew he was right. But fuck. Those walls were there for a reason.

“Don’t risk your destiny for your dignity. It’s not worth it. It never was.” With one last smile, Nash picked up the tent and left the room, but not before calling over his shoulder, “Don’t forget those sleeping bags while you’re pining!”

I flipped him off behind his back. Always a jerk.

One sleeping bag got placed in front of each door, and then I disappeared into my room to narrow down my life. I dumped out my bag on the bed. Obviously, the paperwork didn’t need to come. It felt wrong leaving it, but what good would it do?

Was I really pining?

It didn’t take me long to shove a few shirts and pants into my bag, and anything else I deemed important.

Was that why Scarlett kept her distance? Because she thought I was too worried about my dignity?

Night fell quickly, until only the orange bulb of my room lit my space. I was as ready as I could be, but there was no way I could sleep. I had too much on my mind. I needed room to breathe.

I wandered outside, finding my way to one of the benches that lined the deck. I had gotten used to the sweating, so the heat was almost welcoming when the sun went down. The moon still hung high in the sky, illuminating the world around me. Backlit clouds crowded the dome of nighttime, and I knew it wouldn’t be long before the rain started. I should have gone back inside before I got soaked, but I couldn’t bring myself to leave.

I couldn’t trust my senses, and yet I had to trust my gut. Is this how everyone felt? Falling?

A growl pierced the night air, calling all my attention, followed by a sharp scream. I knew that scream.

“Scarlett!” I called, jumping off the bench and racing around the deck. I knew it was stupid to be docked here for so long. We were too close to the shore. Something had jumped on board and attacked her. Fuck . I demanded my feet to move quicker, faster, even though it felt like I was slogging through quicksand. “Scarlett!”

I rounded the corner that sat closest to the shoreline, my heart racing at what I might fight on the other side. Scarlett, being mauled to death by a jaguar as dark as the night. Scarlett, bleeding out in front of me. Scarlett, dead. No. No. No.

But as I rounded the corner, I stopped dead in my tracks. Nothing was there. The deck was completely empty. No. Fuck. I couldn’t be too late.

This was my fate for not telling her how I felt sooner, for not falling into her open arms. Something had stolen her in the night, she’d screamed for help, and I was too late. As if the universe knew my pain, the skies opened up, and the rains poured down.

“Scarlett!” I screamed, voice raw, wiping the pouring rain from my eyes. “Scarlett!”

My voice echoed back at me, over and over again, sounding more in pain each time it called back. Scarlett. Scarlett. Scarlett. The rain poured, and my broken heart screamed back to me. The water hitting the deck turned to steam in the humid air, filling the night with the thick scent of rotting wood. Something else, darker, much darker, overlaid this smell, almost like the iron tang of blood. Blood .

No. There was no way I smelled blood. The rainforest had to be playing tricks on my senses.

Except...

“James?”

I turned and she was there, standing in front of me, rubbing her eyes. She stood in front of me in nothing more than an oversized shirt, slowly soaking through. The fabric clung to every curve on her body, the moon shining down, making her look positively ethereal.

“You’re okay.” Relief was heavy in my voice.

She looked up at the sky. “You know it’s raining, right?”

Don’t risk your destiny for your dignity.

I didn’t think. I just did. I crossed the deck in three steps, pulled her to me, and pressed my lips onto hers.