Distrustful

Chapter 1

In the middle of a pleasant dream, Maria smiles between gasps.

In it, Maria is sweaty and trembling with desire, her body pressed against the wall while Ursula, positioned behind her, penetrates her in such a rhythmic motion that it's driving her crazy.

The lawyer notices her legs starting to fail her; she's so turned on that she feels her own wetness soaking her thighs while her boss nibbles at her neck, sending jolts straight to her sex.

"I can't take it anymore," she pants, trying to contain the pleasurable bubbling that threatens to take her to the heights, while twisting the sheets between her fingers.

"The idea is for you to come," Ursula whispers in such a seductive tone that the lawyer stops resisting and succumbs until she exhales a pleasurable cry.

Maria's body shudders in a slight spasm on the bed, and she opens her eyes, her heart racing with the certainty that she's had an orgasm while dreaming.

"Damn," she says surprised, running a hand over her face while trying to catch her breath.

She feels very strange as soon as she becomes aware that nothing that just happened in her mind was real.

On one hand, she feels relief that this slip with Ursula hasn't actually occurred because that would have caused a problem between her boss and Mildred, but on the other, nostalgia invades her, knotting in the center of her chest.

Although six months have passed since Ursula told her that the sex between them couldn't continue due to her relationship with Mildred, Maria still hasn't adapted.

It was too many years sleeping with Ursula, and for her, it had become part of her routine, the same routine she had with her husband Marcos, who asked for a divorce on the same date, so overnight, she lost both her husband and her lover.

Since then, Maria has been very lost, feeling lame, clumsy, and with the sensation that she's lost her way, but she doesn't do anything to straighten it out as Ursula often asks her to, so when she notices there's someone in bed next to her, she lets out a weary sigh and turns her head to see who it is.

Maria realizes two things at that moment: the first is that she doesn't remember the name of the short-haired blonde woman who seems to be passed out in this room that's too small for her taste.

The second is that she's late because if enough light is coming through the window for her to distinguish her lover's hair color, it means she's overslept and will probably be late for the meeting scheduled with Ursula first thing in the morning.

"Shit," she mutters after confirming it's past eight.

She gets up without worrying about being quiet and starts looking for her clothes on the floor of the room.

"Are you leaving?" the blonde's voice makes her spin around when, naked and loaded with all her clothes, she was about to cross the door to get dressed in the living room.

"Yes," she answers with the coldness that characterizes her lately, deliberately avoiding eye contact.

"Wait, we can..."

"We can't do anything," Maria cuts her off before she says something that puts her in a bad mood. "This was what it was and it won't happen again, you're an adult, you'll get over it," she says and walks through the door, leaving the girl petrified on the bed.

Maria dresses in a hurry, fearing that the young woman will come out of the room and make a scene, so she doesn't even go to the bathroom, just fixes her hair with her hands and after locating her purse, leaves the apartment as if it were on fire.

She gets in the car intending to stop by her house for a quick shower and change, but when she checks the time, she realizes she'll be too late for the meeting, and the papers that Ursula and a new benefactor need to sign are with her.

Resigned, she drives to work and stops by the bathroom to wash her hands and face and touch up her makeup.

The result doesn't leave her very satisfied, but she can't do more.

"Sorry I'm late," she says entering the room with her best smile.

Maria deploys all her charms and greets the benefactor while telling him a colossal lie that justifies her tardiness. The man smiles and tells her not to worry, that he's in no hurry. Ursula, however, has just pierced her with a look capable of freezing a building.

"Let's go to my office," Ursula says when the meeting ends.

"Would you mind if I first go outside to smoke a cigarette? I don't smoke in the car and I haven't had time," the lawyer asks meekly.

"You'll smoke it later," the businesswoman settles.

Maria sighs and follows her down the hallway with her tablet in hand while remembering the dream she woke up with this morning. She rolls her eyes and tries to push it out of her mind as soon as possible because it doesn't seem appropriate to think about that while looking at Ursula's ass.

"This is the third time this month, Maria," Ursula barks as soon as they enter the office.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she plays dumb, exasperating her boss more, who drops into that padded chair while looking at her with raised eyebrows.

"Don't make me talk to you like you're a child, damn it," Ursula complains, "it's the third time you're late and, besides, look at your appearance," she points at Maria, who looks down at herself.

She's wearing the same mauve suit she left in yesterday afternoon, only it's a bit wrinkled and the shirt is missing one of the buttons that her lover must have broken at some point.

"I don't look that bad," she says and runs a hand over her chest.

Ursula stares at her and finally ends up letting out a laugh.

"No, of course not, you just look like you've had a roll in the car with someone."

"Well," Maria twists a smile and scratches her head while thinking about how much she needs a shower, "not in the car, or maybe there too, but I woke up at her place."

"You know you can't continue like this, right?" Ursula asks, resting her arms on the desk.

Maria sits in one of the chairs across from her, exhausted.

"Like what? I'm not doing so bad."

"Come on, Maria, since Marcos left you, you've been stumbling around like a spinning top, and I think enough months have passed for you to have gotten over it."

The comment tenses the assistant and lawyer.

"Not only did Marcos leave me, you left me too," she drops like a bomb that Ursula wasn't expecting, "suddenly, I was left with nothing."

"Hey," Ursula, understanding as always, gets up and sits next to her, "you and I were just fucking, Maria, don't put me in the same category as Marcos."

"That doesn't matter, Ursula, I was used to you, whether there were feelings involved or not, I missed you a lot," she admits with a sigh.

Ursula looks toward the door, the last thing she'd want now is for Mildred to come in and catch them in the middle of this conversation that, until now, she didn't know had affected her friend so much.

"I missed you too, although I guess not in the same way. Maybe what I found hardest to get used to was not having those moments afterward, our little deep talks."

Maria smiles.

"Exactly, because for the other thing, you had Mildred," she says, narrowing her eyes.

"You had that girl you brought to the barbecue, what was her name?" Ursula tries to remember.

"Alma."

"That's it, you were sleeping with her for several weeks, I thought she was going to become your new lover until, from one day to the next, you left her and started fucking everyone who crosses your path."

"And is that something bad? A girl has her needs," the lawyer justifies.

"Fucking isn't bad, fucking so many people might be. I'm just saying that lately I'm worried about you and I don't know how to help."

"We can fuck on the desk if you want, that would help," Maria jokes.

Ursula laughs and tells her to go to hell.

"I'm serious, slow down a bit, Maria, maybe you should stop looking for women just for a fuck and spend some time being alone, and if you can't, focus on looking for a woman for something more serious."

"Are you crazy?" Maria's eyes open exaggeratedly. "I lost you and I lost Marcos, I'm not going to lose anyone else. Besides, I'm doing very well like this, zero commitments and no explanations, do you know how peaceful I am? That's dedicating time to being alone, alone and satisfied."

Ursula's laughter makes her twist her expression.

"Don't try to justify your behavior by using me or your ex-husband as an excuse. I was just your lover and there were no strings attached, the commitment you had was with him and you did whatever you wanted. Deep down you knew it was a matter of time before he got tired."

"That's true too," the lawyer admits between laughs.

"Anyway, if being a predator is what you want to do now, that's fine with me," says Ursula, "but be responsible and don't be late to work because of a damn fuck, and go take a shower, damn it."

Maria smiles and leaves the building ready to obey, although the first thing she does when she sets foot on the street is light a cigarette and inhale the smoke eagerly, knowing she needs to take measures because lately, besides being a bit lost, she's also smoking more than before.

Maria exhales the cigarette smoke while walking through the parking lot to her car.

The reflection in the glass of one of the parked vehicles returns the image of an elegant woman but with a wrinkled suit and slightly messy hair.

She wonders when was the last time she really looked at herself in a mirror, beyond superficial touch-ups of makeup and hair.

She shakes her head, puts out the cigarette, and gets in the car, determined to take that shower she needs so much.