Chapter 5
5
ELIAS
E lias truly wished that the champagne, endless as it was, could do more for him. At least as much as it seemed to do for the mortals around him. But no, he was still far too sober for the scene Anthony was currently making in the center of the gala.
How funny—they were meant to deflect attention from themselves, and here was Anthony, favored pet of the Dominion’s archangels, gathering as much of it as possible. And although Elias consistently reminded himself that Anthony was, in fact, not one of them, it hardly helped. He couldn’t say that he had ever seen a witch act up like this either. Tlalli was both, and despite the angel wings, she still had some common fucking sense.
He could not say the same for her peers back in the Garden. In reality, Anthony fit in with them far better than Tlalli and Elias ever had. Michael was orchestrating a chaos that was building to impossible heights, and the angels in his employ were eager to hit that final note, whatever it may be. It wasn’t the war either. Elias knew that for certain. He had seen many wars, on Earth and elsewhere, and the greatest struggle wasn’t in the blood and bullets. It was in what came after. In the rebuilding, the recovery.
Elias wasn’t sure Heaven ever actually recovered from the last battle it witnessed. It never recovered from the Fall.
Stop it . He had been doing this a lot lately—questioning everything he thought he knew about both his own faction and each of their sworn enemies. Things had stopped adding up and making sense a long time ago, but Elias wasn’t one to stir the pot or kick up dust. He was just trying to get through the day.
But get through to what? He didn’t know. Eternity had looked exactly the same for ages, and there was nothing to look forward to. The younger angels thought the war would bring great reward. Elias knew better. Because what had been hidden from them—the lies, the deceit, the hypocrisy, the revisionism—could not be hidden from him. He had been there at the beginning of the world and through every stage of its history, and he would be there at the end.
“What the fuck did you say to him, Tlalli!” Anthony barked again, drawing another round of disapproving and disdainful looks.
Truth be told, Elias liked mess, although he never showed it. He had perfected the art of casual disinterest. Yet he wanted to hear all about whatever Tlalli had talked to Anthony’s dad about. That curiosity was only heightened when Elias saw the infamous Cahuani Reyes himself, looking like every sin Elias had ever been warned against. And every temptation he had ever been told to fight.
Therefore, he was invested in whatever story Tlalli had to tell. However, he doubted Anthony’s tantrum was going to get them any legitimate answers, so Elias would have to enforce his babysitter role.
“Anthony, maybe we can use our inside voices for right now, huh?” Elias said, allowing his voice to take on the slightest lilt of patronization. “People are starting to look at us funny.”
“I don’t give a fuck what these people are looking at!” he snapped back. “I want a fuckin’ answer!”
“And I do not care,” Tlalli said slowly with both her mouth and her hands, her fingers appearing to tap each word in midair as she said it. “I don’t know how many times I have to explain this to you, but I literally do not have to explain shit to you, Anthony. You are nothing to me but a coworker.”
“And this is work!” he bit back so hard that Elias was now actively considering an exit. “If you’re risking our fucking plans talking to the enemy, I gotta know about it!”
“And you think if she were, she would tell you that?” It came out of Elias’s mouth before he could stop it, and Anthony was immediately huffing and puffing. Ugh, Elias swore mortals were a full-time job in and of themselves.
Well, Anthony certainly was. Elias was beginning to feel real guilty for expecting Tlalli to put up with him when even Elias himself, known in Eden for his patience, was at his wits’ end with him on day one.
Every other trip before this where he’d been forced to babysit Anthony was starting to take up more space in his brain than he cared to admit. None of this was fucking sustainable.
Before Anthony could explode again, however, Tlalli stormed out of the hall, leaving the two of them there to field the glances they were still getting. Elias was certain the security guards near the door were going to come over at some point, and he wasn’t really all that interested in being subjected to that conversation.
“Go find her,” Anthony snapped at him.
Elias had known anger. Of course he had. It was a byproduct of existence, as a mortal or otherwise. But it had never come so swiftly. Apparently, Anthony had tested infamous patience long enough because he was thoroughly overwhelmed.
“Um, let me remind your ass that I do not work for you, Anthony,” he said coldly, stepping closer to the man and eclipsing him once he swelled to his full size.
He was certain Anthony could see his divine form bristling just beneath his flimsy vessel, the outline of it blooming from his back like a dark shadow. Elias had no qualms about providing the reminder: Anthony was beneath him. Anthony would always be beneath him, and no amount of kissing Michael’s ass was gonna change that. Anthony was beneath Tlalli too. It was time he accepted that.
“You don’t get to demand anything of me. You don’t get to expect me to clean up after you.”
Anthony chuckled. “You know damn well you’re not the front man here, Elias. This is my job. I call the shots.”
“Not to me.” Elias wouldn’t back down, no matter how large Anthony tried to make himself seem. “And whatever this dramatic shit is needs to wait—No, matter of fact, it needs to die. ASAP, and I’m so serious. Leave that girl alone, or I’ll call both of your daddies, the one Upstairs and the one in this house, and tell them you’re being a fucking child.”
Anthony’s face screwed up in petulant rage, but Elias only straightened up further, letting his power bleed lightly from his pores. After a moment, Anthony grunted and stalked off toward the door as well, no doubt to find Tlalli. Elias trusted that if she didn’t want to be found, though, Anthony wouldn’t have much luck.
Though Elias knew he loathed Anthony, he never really knew how to feel about Tlalli. Or at least, he never inspected those feelings. Sometimes, he felt sorry for her. Sometimes, he wished he knew how to be an actual friend to her. And sometimes, he wished he knew how to be something more.
But none of that mattered, because none of that was possible. They were coworkers trapped in an endless cycle of exploitative servitude, and he could offer her nothing beyond what she already had. Besides, they worked well together, likely because of how detached they were from everything and everyone else. It would be foolish to try and fuck up the flow. The work was all that mattered. The work was all that could.
Scrubbing a hand over his face, Elias headed for the bar at the other end of the room in search of something stronger than champagne. It wasn’t that he was completely immune to the alcohol. This was a human vessel, and he felt everything there was for it to feel. However, it took more to affect him, a lot more, and that was the issue at the moment.
A few minutes later, he sat glaring at a glass of straight tequila in front of him. The bartender had given him periodic glances of concern as he filled it, but Elias instructed him to keep pouring until he was told to stop.
“Try some of this,” a voice said from the other side of him.
Elias looked up to see a familiar but not entirely welcome face. Though if he were being honest, this face was far more welcome than Anthony’s right now. Or ever.
Xaphan slid an ornate silver flask across the bar to him before moving closer. Elias smirked.
“I imagine it’s filled with Gluttony’s bourbon,” Elias quipped.
“And it will never run dry,” Xaphan said with a nod.
Elias had met Xaphan on several occasions, in situations such as this, where interests overlapped but courtesy was still maintained. Xaphan had always been one of the more pleasant rivals to be around, but Elias still held his guard up at all times. One could never be too careful, and the demons were always scheming. Kind of like the angels always were.
Although the demons did seem to have given up trying to persuade him to join them. He almost regretted that development.
Elias picked up the flask and took a large swig.
“There’s no reason we can’t be civil with one another,” Xaphan said when Elias handed it back.
“I suppose not. Especially when you’re confident in your work.”
Elias didn’t truly believe Anthony’s claim that Tlalli was working with the demons, but the more he thought about it, the more he realized he didn’t much care. All this, every instance of tension between angels and demons, felt so... forced. The angels wanted a rivalry. Otherwise, they would have destroyed the archdemons a long time ago, torn them out from the root. Instead, they’d sent them away to a place where they could thrive. And grow stronger.
Hell was a monster of Heaven’s own making, and regardless of the cost, the Dominion would never admit that. Like a mortal comic hero and their favorite archnemesis, they needed each other. Or at least, the angels needed the demons.
Xaphan chuckled but he said nothing, merely glancing toward the entrance. When Elias looked at him, really looked at him, he thought he could make out the outline of his true form, equipped with massive corkscrew antlers and stone-gray skin. If he couldn’t, he must have been imagining that Xaphan looked similar to his creator—Lucifer, Prince of Pride, Head of the Puri. Or simply just “Pride” in most places. Someone Elias knew very well.
In fact, he knew every member of the Puri. Much better than anyone could—or would—ever know. And much longer too. He was there before they fell.
Elias himself wouldn’t call it a “fall,” but that was neither here nor there. Those lies had been born, bred, and built into an entire belief system by now. And there was no use fucking with a system he couldn’t beat.
He could admit it. He was a follower. He always had been. He had no interest in being anything else. He didn’t know how. So he made peace with what that entailed. He had to. He had to believe there was nothing he could do. Otherwise, all this shit would suddenly feel so much more miserable, and he wasn’t equipped to handle that.
“Greed knew it would be you,” Xaphan went on, taking a drink of the flask.
When the bartender gave Xaphan a questioning look, he let his eyes flash red, which quickly sent the mortal skittering off in the other direction, no doubt immediately forgetting what he was running from in the first place. Elias gave the demon a disapproving look, but that did about as much as anyone would expect, which was nothing at all. Xaphan merely shrugged.
“Well, you can tell Mammon I say hi,” Elias returned, making sure to emphasize Greed’s given name. Or at least the one given to him by the Righteous God all those ages ago. He knew it wasn’t fair, but existing wasn’t fair. None of this was, and they all had their roles to play.
“Oh, I will, don’t you worry... But I’m actually wonderin’ why your boys sent you down here with those two?”
“You know why Anthony is here, Xaphan.”
Xaphan chuckled. “To throw his old man off.”
Elias nodded.
“I just figured that was a bit... childish for the likes of Michael and Raphael.”
“Now I know you’re just bullshittin’ me.”
Xaphan laughed harder, and Elias’s lips twitched. Michael and Raphael could throw tantrums that put even Anthony to shame, and Elias’s stomach turned every time he thought about it. Because their tantrums usually had an astronomical body count. Ironically, that was what usually made them worthy of praise to their devout followers on Earth. Such was the life of the Righteous God’s favorite angels, Elias supposed.
“What did you really want?” Elias now asked, turning to face Xaphan fully. “I mean, you obviously didn’t expect me to run my mouth about what we’re doing, and you definitely didn’t have to come down just to share a drink, so...”
This time, Xaphan’s laugh was something much darker.
“You forget that I know you, Elias. And I’m not one of those young demons who think the war is a fun idea. I know what it costs, and so do you.”
“So you came looking for a kindred spirit.”
“Naw, I came to remind you that when you’re ready to do the right thing, we’ll be there.”
Ah, so they hadn’t given up on him. “I’m sure Greed told you to pass that along as well.”
Xaphan nodded without hesitation. “He did, but I mean it just the same.” He clapped Elias’s shoulder briefly. “And I’m here if you need a break from your babysitting gig with another drink too. ’Til then, have a good night, Elias.”
Xaphan disappeared, leaving Elias to sit there with a full cup of straight tequila and a heavy feeling in his stomach.
It was difficult to remember all the losses Elias incurred the day Heaven went to war with its own. When Pride fell, all the heavens shifted, and what was and would be changed irrevocably. The weight of those memories alone had kept Elias from forming any new relationships, especially with the younger angels. Especially with Tlalli.
She had been alive for only a few decades, her devotion forged from a history rewritten a thousand times by then. He could never let her in. He could never hand her the truth and expect her to carry it upon her shoulders. It wouldn’t be fair, and it wouldn’t be smart. And Elias would never be capable of opening himself up wide enough to gain her understanding, much less grant her any in return.
Ironic, considering that the wound that day left still felt wide open most days.
The Puri hadn’t just been Elias’s companions. They had been his friends, Greed and Lust most of all. But he had always been adamant about his position, because what was the alternative? Admitting he had wasted years trying to convince himself they had been wrong?
No, absolutely not. He couldn’t. Not now, not ever. The lines had been drawn. Elias had chosen his side. They may have been friends once, but they were no longer. They were the enemy. Greed was the enemy. And Xaphan, by extension.
After knocking back the entire cup of tequila in one swift motion, with a few whistles from his impromptu audience and a gasp from the bartender, Elias pushed away from the bar and headed for the door. He needed some air.