Dutch (BLP Motorcycle Clubs #4)

18. Dutch

All eyes were on me as I entered the club. Some were worried, and others were pissed as they waited for answers. I scanned the faces of my family, my brothers, people I would die for, except right now, I wanted to fuck half of them up.

"All right, let's get this shit over with." My voice boomed. "I know you're wondering why I went lone wolf on this one."

I ignored the comments that rippled through the room.

"I get it. I broke protocol, but I would do the same for any of you. I was ambushed trying to get to Makari."

There it was. The room went silent when I mentioned her name.

"In case you didn't know, the people who are gunning for Makari are coming for us, too. Thankfully, the resident mole has been put out with the garbage, so be angry with him."

I looked around the room, letting that sink in. "I owe you all an apology, but right now, we need to circle the wagons because, like it or not, gentlemen, this is war!"

"Who's ready to raise hell?"

"Bullshit!" Saint snarled. "You're compromising everything the Sons of Shadows stand for! All for some cop who'd throw us six feet under at the drop of a dime!"

The energy in the room shifted. Saint was always a hothead, but he had pull. And I saw doubt creeping into the eyes of some of the new members.

"Careful, brother. Last I checked, loyalty was still our number one code. Or did you forget while you were pointing fingers?"

Saint's jaw clenched, but I didn't give him an opportunity to answer.

"Let me break it down. This woman you seem quick to dismiss has intel that could save all our asses, not to mention staying alive should be a priority on our list."

I lowered my voice for dramatic purposes. "Unless anyone else wants to question my judgment, Jahlil's crew is coming for us, and I plan on being ready. Who's with me?"

The roar drowned out the doubt in my gut, and when it died down, the bravado I was wearing felt like a lie. I spotted Makari standing in the corner with her arms crossed. It was when I wondered how long I could keep this up. It was like straddling the line between club president and whatever I was to Makari. I felt like I was riding two bikes at once, and I was about to eat pavement.

"We'll reconvene in an hour. I need a minute."

I caught Makari's eye and tilted my head toward the office, and she followed. I closed the door behind us.

"Are you good?" I questioned.

"I should be asking you that. It seems like you're about to snap?"

I ran a hand over my head. "It feels like it. Today's been one hell of a day.”

"No shit, not to mention I'm not exactly everyone's favorite person?—"

"Hey, don't worry about them. I've got your back."

"And who has yours?" Makari countered, her eyes searching mine.

Her question hit harder than I expected. I wanted to reach out but decided against it. "I need you to understand something. This situation is dangerous, and some people don't take kindly to being put in dangerous situations."

Makari's eyes flashed with anger. "You think I don't know that? I've been living this since Malakai died."

"I know you have and can handle yourself, but Jahlil's getting desperate, and I have a feeling he's not playing anymore.”

She crossed her arms. "Neither am I."

I chuckled. "You never back down, do you?"

"If I did, would you respect me?"

The question hung between us. "Even when you drive me crazy, I've always respected you."

She grinned. "The feelings are mutual, big man."

I paused, knowing I needed to say my next words carefully. "Listen, I know things between us are complicated… we have history, but I need you to trust me. Can you do that?"

Makari's eyes dropped to the floor, and when he looked at me, her vulnerability caught me off guard. "I want to, but every time I let my guard down…"

"I know," I interjected. I was tired of making promises. Right now, I would move heaven and earth for her, and that scared me.

We fell into silence, and I knew she was trying to read me, but I forced myself to hold her gaze. Before I could second-guess myself, I moved close to her and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her into my chest. Makari stiffened for a second but then melted into my embrace. Her hands gripped the back of my leather jacket.

I buried my face in her hair. "I got you love."

I felt her nod against my chest. I reluctantly released Makari, and my fingers lingered on her arm. "Stay here. I gotta handle something."

She nodded. I turned away before I lost my nerve.

I found Saint. "I know you have doubts about me, but we have bigger fish to fry."

Saint scoffed. "You went off half-cocked, putting your brothers at risk for what a piece of?—"

"Choose your next word carefully, brother."

The room went silent as we squared up, waiting to see how it played out. Saint didn't back down, but I saw a flicker of uncertainty in his eyes.

"Jahlil's making moves. He thinks he can come at us sideways and pick us off one by one. The way he got to Diesel, he found a way to penetrate us from the inside out. Now he's working on turning us against each other. It will make it easier for them to overtake us," I warned, addressing the entire room now. "We're the Sons of Shadows. We don't back down. It's us or them, and I'd be damned if I let Jahlil take this from me."

"We move tonight," Saint declared, even though he was ready to rip me a new one a few minutes ago.

"I want eyes on every corner of Jahlil's territory. Find his weak spots and exploit them," I commanded.

"Let's light these motherfuckers up like the Fourth of July!" Rico declared.